SB Nation - Login for mobile commenting

Lookout Landing

4/20: Open Game Thread, Part 2

If I left my house right now, I think I could park and get inside the stadium by the ninth...

0 recs  |  1215 comments

Comments

This is a really bad decision by Scioscia
that works perfectly

crap.

it's genius

give Wilk some confidence by allowing him a RBI hit and they keep him on the roster for another year

it backfired
I can never decide if Mike really believes in platoon splits or not.
Still a bad decision
I love it when we make bad decisions

look brilliant for opposing teams.

To be fair

there was like a 65% chance of that happening anyway.

Wonder what the rationale behind this bullpen move is...
O'Day's been pretty good and Mike still thinks we have a shot at the game.

I’d guess.

Was the new thread just to distract people

from your calling Wilkerson a switch-hitter?

No, that was just a happy coincidence
Ok I'm starting to get tired of defending Wilk...

Even though he is admittedly still our best option.

McLaren-esque call

of course, it never works out in our favor.

Fucking hell I am not happy with you Brad
Am I the only one that thinks Wilk

has about zero bat speed left?

I'm beginning to think that he's finished
You are not the only one.
I'm not defending him as hard as I used to...he's swinging through really hittable pitches.
YOU SUCK WILKERSON FUCK OFF BACK TO RUSSIA
That was a golden opportunity. I can't stand you anymore Brad!
Okay

I’m officially pulling my support of WIlkerson until he shows me something.

Because that was not fucking something.

Wht the hell is a SPorts Emmy?
Here comes the Martin Scorsese of the Angel pitching staff
Whats up with all these Tits Ks?
I guess you could say the Angels are going Tits up?
Batista....pitching.....good?
What the fuck are the Angels doing?
Adopting the Mariners' gameplan.
Whatever it is, keep it up
The same thing the M's were doing

Against Santana.

Only you guys are doing this

versus Beluga Tits.

I won't argue that Halos come off the worse

in that comparison.

You know what's good exercise?

Go to your local BevMo/liquor store, spend $100, and walk around holding the cart for half an hour.

and you would do this....why?
Because you're indecisive about what else to buy
thought you didn't drink liquor
Beer
$100 worth of beer is heavy
Indeed
I really need to go beer shopping

tomorrow seems like a good day

I was long overdue

glad they had Stone Russian Imperial Stout this time.

maybe I'll go after this game

I’m thirsty now. Also, who needs dinner when you have newly bought beer?

You should do it tonight

no sense putting it off. Some Unibroue would hit the spot…

I'm wondering about hours on Sundays

since I go to smaller stores, but this game should be over soon enough.

My local liquor store doesn't have room for carts.
Coincidentally, just got done with my workout at the gym

glad to see the M’s actually winning for once.

Carts do have wheels, you know
I meant to say basket

god dammit.

Well at least you weren't lazy

Wheeled tools, p’shaw

the wheel was mankind's worst invention
Big Willie Style has had a much longer legacy than I thought it would
Adam Jones would have....
That's a long run for Raul

How often does Dave Sims say that?

DIE RAUL DIE YOU SLOW FUCK.
Milton Bradley would have caught that

And injured himself

and torn ACL
"and injured himself"
Lol

I was trying to add severity to the injury. I realize my grammer was bad there.

Chris Snelling makes that catch and then explodes
But still OPS's around .800
Adam Jones, Wlad, Reed, Saunders, me

all make that catch

Bonds could make that catch
Oh good, Mr. stranded baserunners himself.
Rex Hudler play of the day...

1st basecoach earflap.

Now let's go full circle by talking about Alfredo Griffin's sunglasses
DO NOT WALK HIM

DO NOT WALK HIM

I approve of this message
WOOOOOOOOOOO K!
thanks for swinging at the GMJ
dammit "at that"
Siddown punk
That was an Angels rally?
As mad as i am at Wilk

This is pretty funny

6Ks for Beluga Tits
SIT THE FUCK DOWN YOU PIECE OF SHIT FUCK OFF
*Headhitsdesk*

Ball 4, GMJ.

There there.

At least you don’t have Vidro.

or

Kenji,
or
Wilkerson
or
Morse
or
Cairo

So refreshing to not see Sexson topping this list.
Word

Looks like Sexson is going back to 2005-06 form (so far, not saying it will last just yet, can’t agree with the casual fans about his comeback just yet).

WHERE IS YOUR FUCKING RALLY MONKEY NOW BITCHES
Taking the day off to go to Disneyland with Hunter.
Its ok

Apparently Squinty took last Sunday off after winning two, I guess its only fair you guys take today off.

I will let her buff my batting helmet any time.
A Don Henley reference?

reeeeeaaaalllly?

Woahhh forgot about TJ Bohn.

Took him like 6 months to get his first hit. Then they sent him down.

So...re-sign Joh?
Over my dead body
been nice knowing you.
They cannot be that stupid, surely.

:(

seriously?

as long as he doesn’t end with a Richie-esque line I’m betting he’ll be picked up.

A Richie-esque line is like an .880 OPS
last year Richie

BA and OBP

Signing a catcher through his decline years for $tonnes

When your best prospect is a ML ready catcher?

That would be a worse signing than Washburn.

Two words for you

Bill Bavasi.

I'm still holding out hope that this offseason will be awesome
might not be making those decisions
Even Bavasi is not that dumb.
Bavasi trade for Jose Vidro

he is that dumb.

Re-signing Johjima is way dumber than that trade.
It's not.
Yes it is
What Graham said.
Youre' assuming the Clement won't be traded

won’t be traded for Brad Lidge once Philly fall out of the race.

How does that make it any less stupid?
You're assuming that you're not saying dumb things.
Too Graham-ey
Whatever, I'm right. :o
You're taking all of your opinions from the blogosphere

Sheep

Faggot I'm the mayor of sheep
Yeah it is

It would be the dumbest move any manager ever made ever

The Vidro trade was the stupidest trade I've even seen

I can totally see them re-signing Johjima because the M’s don’t cut veterans loose until the completely roll off a cliff. They’d then move Clement D… holy shit that is stupid.

How can that be the stupidest trade you've ever seen

When that same offseason we traded Raffy Soriano for Horacio Ramirez

Trading a fragile RP for a starter

*good idea(!)

believing HO had talent= *dubious

He has to throw money at Teixeira, right?

Right?

NYY needs a 1B >:(
Maybe Hank will let them rebuild after their 82-80 finish this year?
Huh?

What are you talking about, yankees never rebuild? They have to win, every season! Or else their fans will disown them!

The early 90s disagree
How about the last 12-13 years?

They’ve tried to defy the success cycle by spending way more on seasons where they were supposed to rebuild.

I hope Morgan Ensberg kicks some serious ass.
Only if we get to make Whale Meat out of his fat arse.

He needs to lose weight the fat shit.

Most predictable news story of the day...

Snelling on DL with knee inflamation. But TJ Bohn is up!

Philly really is M's East.
Gillick wants to recreate the minors system he trashed.
That was a really good pitch

Completely wasted on Bloomquist

Yeah I'd just save my arm and let him hit it off a tee.
What a day for O'Day!

When a supervirus finally comes around to destroy all of humanity, I hope they call it Hudler.

"What a day for O'Day'

die hudler die

What beach should I visit in America?

We need a beach holiday next year – where should I go? Can be east or west coast.

Hehe, "America"
does it have to be continental U.S.?
hawaii
amen brother

anywhere in Hawaii is great

Bit far that mate.

That’s like a 14 hour flight. But I’d love to visit Pearl Harbour….

and England to Seattle isn't a long flight?
That flight almost killed me.
Pussy
seriously, that's not even 10 hours
Hell of a lot longer than 14 hours
It was 9.5 hours to Seattle from London.
It would basically be a full day of travel
is it just me or have airline costs

gone through the rough in the last few months? They were already bad, but I was checking into Amsterdam back in November and it was ~650 for non-stop from Seattle with only 2 weeks notice. I just checked for July and it’s like $1200

Fuel costs, mostly

Although increasing monopolization doesn’t help much.

When people ask me why I hate America

I direct them to Orbitz.com and tell them to try booking a flight.

You could just direct them to Houston

or Anaheim for that matter

Yessir.

Fuel surcharges are a bitch. Shop around for special offers though: I have flights to NYC for £250, which is awesome.

Well of course part of that is that July = travel season

but yeah, prices right now are awful. I’m not even looking because I’m afraid.

I think so

but its also more expensive in the summer for trips to Europe

Southern California

assuming Hawaii’s too far.

Jeff needs someone to bond with.
Jeff would hate me.
Alkai Beach

In Seattle.

Unless you like. y'know, want to go swimming or something
I was jk

I was suggesting she go catch a Mariners game while she’s here, in Seattle.

Galveston in Texas

on the Gulf of Mexico.

Shut up Anaheim :)
Yeah I was just thinking that...few things more satisfying then thousands of dissapointed Halo fans
Poi pu (sp?) or Oceanside CA
GTFO Wilkerson.
also a hidden gem in the Northwest is...

Lake Ozette. Take a 2 1/2 hike from the lake and you are at the ocean. I love it there

O yea

Or Lake Chelan.

I don't like Chelan

So many people

plus it's f---in cold in the water!
I'll say it now:

Vlad is declining.

Probably because he's 42
Vladimir Guerrero: AL Comeback Player of the Year 2009

After Sexson wins it in 2008

O wait, shoot, take that back

I shouldn’t be cheering for angels players

Is he lying about his age too?
He's 2-3 today...
I think he's losing his HR power
Possible.

I’m gonna give it a few months before I get too worried.

His HR/FB has dropped for five consecutive seasons
It's not an FB when it's an Angel in question.
They have a new phrase for 'fly ball' in Anaheim?
I fixed, Graham.
I'd already hit post!
So did I!

Who’s the credible one now betch!

Oh wait, you meant fly balls didn't you!
He seems to be hitting more ground balls

Dunno if that’s true or not

Ok, Rex, there is no way I would ever want my Little Leaguer to do that.

Definitely ends with him breaking his glasses, a nose bleed, and lots of crying.

What would an Angel inning up at the plate be

without a little nubber Sims.

Far less infuriating.
That was punishment for the suck Kenji
Wow Kenji just ate that like a champ.
Raul: "I got it!"

Willie: “You sure you can get to it?”

Raul: “It’s just a pop-up!”

Willie: “Again, You sure you can get to it?”

Oh fuck you Aybar.
Holy crap, good arm
jeez. hate to see that but great play
Oh my god that was a great play
Thats a nice play
Aybar's got like 4 great plays today.
I remember when Yuni

used to make plays like that.

Why is Lopez slow?
Aybar's like the Halos version of Betancourt

Great range, good arm, propensity for really stupid mistakes on routine plays.

I wish Yuni still had that kind of range
Getting fat?
This one hasn't happened yet.
When elected president I will make the date of Rex Hudler's death a national holiday

and I will also be responsible for Rex Hudler’s death

And the Hawk?
Put it on the board....

YESS

Jeff will just damage his psyche so much that he's left sobbing and eating his on excrement in a mental facility.
get him elected

president of Iraq and we won’t have to worry about them every again…..

Can I have you take responsibility for Uwe Boll's death?

Bastard has it coming.

Jeff Sullivan Has The Skeletons In His Closet You've Always Wanted In Yours
The Jeff-Robert ticket

Will outshine the Hudler-Physioc ticket.

I think he needs someone less white to balance the ticket.
Fine, the Hudler-Jake Woods ticket

Happy?

No, Jeff.
Graham is half-foreign

that’d do the trick.

Is he eligible to run?
Does that come with Matthew? Because they're pretty much the same person.
I'm entirely foreign

I’m just half not white.

And I can only be Prime Minister

It's too bad we don't have a monarchy

You two could marry each other and merge your counties.

How bout Johnbai?
America's not ready for a wigger VP
Just make it Matthew if Graham's inelligible. Seriously, it's not all that different.
I'm meaner
Shadow goverment then
GRAHAM IS IN THE ILLUMINATI
RON PAUL WAS RIGHT!!!!

NAFTA AND THE ILLUMINATI ARE GOING TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!

You can be prime minister.

Control over two areas of the world.

You underestimate my meanness potential.
Then we're back to the honkey problem
I'd rather by ambassador to the UN anyways

talk about a cushy job

Fuck it I'm running on my own

Jeff for president, Jeff for VP.

Well, you'd capture the delusional narcissist vote.
Very very white, but an awesome running mate.

Could go for Mace Windu if race is still an issue.

Whoa, that's bigger than the one I thought I copied.
Try Supreme Court Justice.

You get it for life, and you only have to work when you feel like it.

I like to travel

and those robes are not flattering.

I'm sure you could come up with "fact finding missions."

Senators do all the time.

And you could tell everyone you were shot at!
Just tell everyone that Robert has a black friend.
Cuban friend
Tell them you'll put an Indian in your cabinet.
Well, his cupboard at least.

Hah, take that esoteric reference.

And that's close enough!

Uhhh just reading through the game thread now and thought, “someone has to finish the joke”

I have an Afghan friend

Does that count?

Thats kind of like Obama's middle name being Hussien

It could work against you…

I'm trying to report him to the NSA if it makes it any better
Dude, think of all the opium you'll miss out on.
I think you need a half black-half mexican woman.
I can be black yo
10,000 little leaguers = 10,000 crushed little spirits
When elected president, can you place a ban on children?
I will place a ban on other people's children
I will place my dong on other people's chil-erm... wait...
JEFF IS A NAZII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111111111
It got elected once, it could happen again
Once your elected you can cancel all elections.

I’m surprised no president has thought of this.

Mugabe has >:(
Worked for Hitler.
Lesson to Jeff:

Do not invade Russia in the fall/winter

If I had a time machine

I think I’d go back and tip Hitler off.

World would certainly be a different place.

Doubt he would have listened though. You don’t speak German.

"I am a donut"
Honestly I'd probably just sleep with Traudl
Downfall's a good movie
Very

and Traudl was hot.

her father was a master brewer from Bavaria

I’m for this.

I need a time machine so I can travel to WWII Germany and have her
the hell with causality

I’m fucking shit up!

Upon closer inspection

only the actress portraying Traudl was hot.

Romanian

damn those eastern europeans and their hot hot women!

To hell with America, I'm moving

the Romanian leu is stronger than the dollar, right?

At this point, probably.
it's sadly not that far off

worth 44 cents

according to IMDB, she's single!
I'm coming for you, Alexandra!
Kenji gets nutted more than any other ballplayer.

T/F

Hey a baserunner with less than 2 outs.
If you cut off Physioc's cliche IV

he would die instantly.

They're kinda stirrin... liek a hen does... in the... in the... chickenhouse
This game needs a good

collision at home plate….

Hopefully it takes out Squinty.
Noise sign back on. Lame
K!!!

Tits is fucking awesome

Sit the fuck down!
That is a beautiful pitch

Miguel’s been all over the edges today.

Sweetness

Napoli flailed and bailed

That's why you don't swing at the 4th pitch.
Has tits EVER had 7K's for us?
2 times last year.
never 8 though
That's the first time he's had 8, though.
Dmitri Young has 2 at bats this season

that was an awesome extension Bowden.

Jesus Christ

Two at bats? What the hell is he even doing on that roster?

he's not even pinch hitting for pitchers? WTF?
Batista is looking around wondering what the fuck is going on...

Not to see his defense, Rex

Sims allllmost called that.
Sweet Tits K!
8 K's!

Holy shit

Tits is fucking dealing
Ever think you'd type that?

Ever?

KKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
8K'S IS GENUIENLY IMPRESSIVE!
OK, this has become distressing.
Distressingly comical
Now you know how we feel

when we allow crappy pitchers to go 8 innings.

Batista's not good but he's not crappy.
Think he'll come out for the 8th?
Except we don't strike out this much against them
Give Miguel his body back, Felix
...why?
Because Felix needs to be back in his body on Tuesday
Well he should take Miguel's every time Miguel pitches

...ladies
You want some power pitching?

Look like Captain Picard's clone

from that horrible movie that killed Star Trek.

Bootcheck is a shit name
Not as cool as Booty.
Haha

That was just like Yuni and Ibanez

Vidro thinks he's setting a trend

Fat short men with smooth sunglasses

Vidro/Sexson/Wilkersuck

Odds of a 1-2-3 inning?

It's time to accept this

Richie’s been good.

I have no problem accepting this.
Its just hard to admit that Squinty was right about something

(Sexson possibly coming back).

even a squinty squirrel gets a nut once in a while
I can't get my head around it and I refuse to believe it is real.
God damn he's hitting everything hard
you are talking

about Sexson not Wilkerson … right?

crap

should have waited for him to finish the at-bat.

That's what she said.
WILKERSON!!
Good thing he didn't do that when the bases were loaded

:(

of course, a hit when the bases are empty
that's a classic dan wilson hit
WILKRDOUBLE!
FUNK WILK DOUBLE
I still can't picture him hitting a HR.
time to update his blog, he hasn't had much to write about lately

http://blog.bradwilkerson.org/

Holy shit Wilkerson hit

so…confused….right now…

I don't like unpredictability.
Apparently Wilkerson's had too many basehits today.
That was a power pitch and you didn't hit it out
Okay fine I'll jump on the bandwagon

JEEEEEEFFFFFFF CLLLLEEEEMMMMEEEEEENNNNTTTT!!!!!!!!!

As long as we trade Kenji for value and actually use said value

I’m all for him right now.

No matter how irrational, I still have a hard time beliving we don't re-sign Kenji.
I would go all stabby stabby
Experence has taught me

to expect a lot of stupid.

I think it's very rational

when you take into account who’s running the show…

He's mine
Fine you can have Clement's man-children.
You guys will regret this.

When Kenji hits .330 with 30 homers with another team. :(

You're being sarcastic, right?
No we won't

because we’ll have Clement.

I'd rather have Joh.
That's why you are you.
Because you are insane
Thank god you're not the GM
Just because he's struggling

doesn’t mean he’s going to hit bad all year.

Which has nothing to do with Clement
Yes but it's abundantly clear that Clement is a better hitter than Joh.
Why can't we have Joh as catcher and

Clement at 1B?

Because that's a complete waste
No, it's not. Who do we have in the minors

at 1B? We always have Moore to be catcher as well.

No

It’s a complete fucking waste of a catcher prospect to move him from a 3.5 spot to a -1.5 spot

I just want Kenji on this team.

You guys sure weren’t complaining about him before the season.

I'm sure I've been on record saying I'd kill things if we re-signed him for a while
We did however admit that Clement should be starting in 09
When has anyone ever said they want him re-signed?
Nobody

But there are lots of free agent 1B who are better suited for the position.

As far as catchers go, though, Clement is much better than Kenji

We can sign Teixeira or draft someone.

Finding an average hitting 1B is not hard.

Because it's a stupid fucking idea.
Because that's a complete waste of Clement
Because Clement can't play 1B?

And where would we put Teixeira? And Kenji’s on the wrong side of 30? And he’s never had patience so his bat will only get worse from this year forward?

And he costs a lot for someone who'll suck in 2 years?

And fuck just take the draft picks

He may suck in one year or less :o
Like we'll offer him arb...
Shush
Mike Cameron, Jose Guillen...
Shush
The Ibanez siging

we just don’t give a shit about those things.

Never change, my friend, never change.
You fucking kidding me?
If this is an act, he should get paid for it.
Trust me, it's not.... :\
Coach Owens is actually Rev HaloFan
That would kill my head.
And everything would finally make sense
Plus Clement's bat is much more valuable at catcher.
And he can do it at 600k a year

And let us go after Teix or another impact FA

...OR RE-SIGN FELIX

But you make bad life decisions
John Olerud Sucks
I will make a bet with you

If Johjima outhomers Clement in 2009, I will not drink for a month.

If Clement outhomers Joh in 2009, you will drink for a month.

I'd kill to see this.
Be less obviously sad and pathetic and peole will like you more.
Don't listen to him.

Any kind of attention is good attention, right?

Are the meltdows as fun if you try to ignite them?
This is correct.

I advise you to start wearing your little sister’s jeans, dye your hair black, and cut yourself after school.

Don't listen to JI

You exist for my amusement. More belligerent randomness please.

In my weaker moments I feel bad for him.
Imagine how much it would suck if we lost this?
shut the fuck up >:(
kinda weird that we're only up 4
You live for unhappiness
The Halos only hope now lies in McLaren.
The truth in this statement is frightening.
Dunno if he can even save you now

Flailing fixes everything

I think tits is determined for the shutout
Sexson's also making routine plays
Guerrero=warning track power
Looks like Jeff is right about Vlad's HR power.

Vlad thought he had that.

That's actually just what I was thinking.
declining power you say?
The wrong side of 30, you say?
Needs more roids
Nice power old man
Vlad = warning track power

Old man Vlad

How was that not gone?
That kinda scared me off the bat...
Yeah, Vlad is losing it

Seems obvious now

NO NOT RHODES NO!
It may be opposite day... so this could work.
Putz not in. Game still in Question.
Rhodes

your late inning situational lefty.

thank potatoes for that
SIT THE FUCK DOWN SQUINTY!
Nice game Tits

We needed that, thank you

Well this is an excellent idea
Yeah hell of an outing.
Watching Major League on TBS

My favorite baseball movie, but its edited so it isn’t as funny.

Look at this (silly) guy.
strike this (guy) out
They're still (lousy)

The opening day crowd reminds me of the crowd at the Oakland Coliseum.

Why not let Batista try for the last out?

He hasn’t thrown that many pitches.

Oh and watch Scioscia counter by pinch hitting Quinlan.

110 pitches.
Doesn't seem like that many. >_>
stop rooting for us to fail
I have a funny feeling you're right
Interesting items turn up when you search Arthur Rhodes:

That's how I discovered I share the same name as an outspoken white supremacist
Rhodes threw that 91.3 MPH according to gameday.
Rex Hudler Surgery

brain transplant

I think Rex Hudler surgery is where they remove your scrotum, and place it where your brain used ot be.
'Rex Hudler surgery'

a complete removal of the brain

Be more creative
Potatoes in for Tacoma

still no luck – walk, popout, single, groundout, single RS, groundout.

Not worried about it...

This Rhodes kid looks sharp

Poor hapless Irish person..
Arthur Rhodes is great on MLB The Show.
been, through. wars.
The Show gives Raul better defensive stats the Wlad

Just an FYI

The Show rates Wlad WAYYYYYY better than Adam Jones.
I lol'd at that too

Wlad’s stats put him close to Major league ready and Jones’ stats look like a AA player.

So Boston is like way better than us
What a stunning revelation
Fascinating stuff.

That's clearly Captain America >:(
Still have to admit that's a funny pic.
I like this one

There’s a few others on Google Image search that are fairly good.

Water is wet.

Ground is down.

Polly Shore is irrelevant.

Isn't it 'Pauly'?
Not in my head.
So Shore's a transvestite in your head?

Weird shit going on up there.

it's not a stretch buuuudy
To be fair,

in my head, everybody’s Polly.

I want a jam sandwich
A little jam sandwich
I think Jose just shit his pants.
SHUT UP YOU FUCKING KIDS
Rivera Izturis Napoli, huh?

Well, it’s theoretically possible to score 4 runs in an inning.

Putz isn't available

Game still in question! (Insert pic here).

You can't grow up to become Mark Lowe

Mark Lowe is already Mark Lowe

Some stats from my Mariner MLB The Show franchise:

M’s:

38-18

Raul – .370 BA, 16 HR
Beltre – .388 BA [leads AL], 9HR, 16 2B
Wilkerson – .344 BA, 14 HR
Chipper Jones [traded for Beak!] – 288BA, 15 HR
WLAD – .322 BA [in 2 hole], 7HR
Lopez – .355 BA, 6 HR

Turn up the difficulty

Also, The other GMs in the game are like Bill Bavasi, you can get away with highway robbery.

Haha seriously
....

maybe he’ll grow up and become Mark Lowe, a relief pitcher for the Mariners.
aaah my brain

Lowe is basically back to where he was in 2006
Except for the part where god dammit
I still think his velocity is down
His velocity is down a little but his strike/contact rates are fine
oh yeah, he's back to being good

I just meant he’s not going to be touching 101 like he did on occasion in ‘06

kds;ksdk;jdjk;sdkl;
Throw strikes you ass
Hoo boy time for some excitement eh?
I knew this game felt too easy
WHY MUST YOU CRUSH MY SOUL MARINERS FFS
NOT TOUGH DFA RHODES
Okay

Get Hyphen out there

Or Morrow

Or anyone

THROW SOME FUCKING STRIKES YOU CUNT RAG
HYPHENHYPHENHYPHENHYPHEN!
Abandon all hope, ye who enter the Mariners bullpen
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT
OMG. STRIKES PLEASE
This game is over....

the M’s are made of fail.

Actually they're 97.5% Fail, with a 2.5% Crushed Hope impurity.
This is exciting.
Changing the channel now...
FUCK FUCKFUCKFUCK FUCK
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK
OH MY FUCKING GOD DIE DIE DIE
We will lose...
McLaren...

don’t fuck it up…

JESUS CHOCOLATY CHRIST BRING IN RRS
28 bucks says we win this one
get him out of there FFS

Opps forgot to use all caps.

Dave Sims needs to be

A) More stereotypically white

B) More stereotypically black

Neither

I enjoy him as he is.

A all the way
No

Dave Sims is fine the way he is. But I guess A would be pretty funny.

The correct answer was B while doing A.
After Felix possessed Batista

Morrow possessed Lowe

OH NOES MORROW
RRSRRSRRSRRSRRSRRSRRSRRSRRSRRSRRS
Morrow?!
We need someone who won't walk people. Duh
Morrow up

THIS IS THE WRONG IDEA

Morrow's warming up!?

YAAAAAAAAARGHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Beauuuuuuuuty changeup
MORROW?

Squinty decided this inning hasn’t had enough walks

I'm glad Hudler and Physioc haven't heard of Grant Balfour
K!!!

Now get the fuck out of this Mark!

I love Lowe's change
That wasn't a strike
It's been a wide zone all game
That was the sexiest at bat of the game
that was good
OH SWEET JESUS THANK YOU!
Shut up Scoscia, it's not like you just walked two in a row
BIG STRIKEOUT!!!
Okay....he seems to have settled down

How about warming up a little better next time Mark?

RING HIM UP MARK!
Lowe's velocity is down.
slow gun

gameday says he’s ok

Yeah, I just noticed Lowe and Rhodes both hit 94 on the TV gun

But Rhodes was 91 and Mark was 96. WTF?

Great play Mark.
Holy shit what a play.
Oh man that off speed pitch [slider?] is deadly.
Uh he was definitely out.
SIT THE FUCK DOWN MIKE
TOSS HIM! TOSS HIM!
hahaha

safe.

fuck the Angels.

moron arguing with moron time
Thanks for the false hope, Lowe.
Daily Scioscia bitchfest!

whinewhinewhinewhinewhine

YES TAKE THAT ANGELS PUSSY HITS

LOWE SAYS NO

hahaha he was safe!!!
Nope he was out

Juuuust barely

Seriously man

That’s the closest correct call I’ve seen in a long time.

Tied

50% of the time they call him safe.

I saw the season flash before my eyes
He was out

Don’t worry.

I thinkg he may have been out.
I think Lowe just barely got him.
Smells distinctly like salmon hotpockets in here

Almost like a Chone Figgins pussy hit is approaching

That changeup...it's just, dude
Because the Angels don't get enough cockshit hits

They need more.

I enjoy that word...
Do. Not. Walk.
doomsday is approaching
sHIT FUCK DAMN HELLFUCKINGAL;KJA;SLKJDF;LKAJWERM
walks are stupid Mark
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK

IT’S CHONE FIGGINS JUST PIPE IT YOU MOTHERFUCKER

well shit
OHGODOHGODOHGODOHGOD

OHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGOD

This is really annoying
Do. Not. Want.
GMJ is a Mariner Killer :(
PINCH HIT HUNTER GOD DAMN IT!
OK he got a hit, but I stand by my demand.
we're going to lose
Please do not bring Morrow in
Please end this.
Hmmm

I wish we had Sherrill and Putz to go to =(

GROUNDER TO LOPEZ PLEASE
TO LOPEZ...

not in the hole

So ... when we stranded those two RISP with 1 out early on

Is really sucking now eh?

I refuse to believe GMJ won't get out
That was fast

His differential is impressive. This will come into play.

FUCKITY FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK
where was Sexson on that play?
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCKFUCK

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK

PENIS!!!!!!!!1
Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck
FUCK FUCK FUCK
IBB Vlad

It’s not even a question

FUCK NO ANYONE BUT GMJ

WHY THE FUCK ARRRRRRRGHHH

Oh what type of cockery is this
Needs more putz
Beat me to it
holy fuck

[flashbacks to baltimore]

Nauseating

Needs more Putz

We're going to lose with Vlad proving me wrong
That's what I'm thinking...
Vlad, if they don't walk you....
Does GMJ do this to anyone else...
IBB, get RRS for Anderson PLEES
RRS. DO. WANT.
I seriously am not watching the Mariners for a week or two if we lose this game...
This could ... kill me.
I dno't know why

But I’m totally unconcerned right now.

Because you've accepted that we're boned?
I haven't been able to feel emotion for the Mariners since Hunter's catch
4/20 treat ya well huh?
Walk his ass, RSS pitches to Anderson.
Hit Vlad in the head!

I mean…..walk him…..yeah…...

Then a single ties it... I say not
OH FUCK IT'S MORROW DAMMITFUCKFDAMMITHELL
Oh no...into the fire.
No morrow no no no no n ono n ono no no
Morrow?

Sad face

Morrow??!

Oh shit I”m fucking scared!

Baaaaad feelings about this
I might need to double my intended alcohol intake...
Morrow, yeah, this'll work.
Morrow for Lowe?

Seriously….what’s the point?

DISASTER POTENTIAL: HIGH
THIS IS So FUCKING STUPID

I’M GONIG TO HAVE TO REITERATE HOW MAC NEEDS TO BE SLOWLY BEATEN TO DEATH WITH A RUSTED STRAPON

God I hate my life.
Will someone make me feel better please?
I'm worried you'll squirt on me.
danger danger AWOOGA AWOOGA
We're gonna win

You heard it here first.

SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!!!!!!!!
I mean it.

We’re gonna slip this one out.

False

I bet on it about 50 comments ago

Can we delay the game and fly in Putz?

Fuck this shit man

IBB THEN RRS IBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRSIBB THEN RRS

see what happens when you walk people Mark?

we made this offense look shitty for 8 innings.

So I just tuned in to a pretty crazy situation looks like
JEFF NEW RULE ANYONE WHO PREDICTS ANYTHING IS IMMEDIATELY BANNED
I predict that I'll have sex with your mom
I predict nobody likes you
I predict everyone likes you
so, Morrow hangs a slider?
Sounds about right
Leverage index - eleventy thousand
GET WELL SOON JJ
NO ITS NOT WHAT I WANT TO SEE

I WAN TA GODDAM CHIRST FUCKING INTENTIONAL WALK

FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
oh fuck we need those ump
Hello, gun store.. yes..

Thats is right only one bullet please.

Bring in Felix.
I WILL BREAK YOU

WTF CURVEBALL!?!??!????!
Guess it was 12-6 Slider?
That's been a strike all day
just thinking that
OHSHITSOHSHITOHSHIT
I was gonna get a shower with the game over.

Now im just naked.

FUCKING GOD TIT SHIT COCK

I HATE THIS BULLPEN MANAGEMENT

I'm going to die of a heart attack at 26.
STRIKE 2! Mind dying here.
thank god vlad has no eye

strike 3 please

MORROW: "Gotta walk the world BRB"

GOTTA WALK THE WORLD BRB

oh jesus christ

i just ducked sitting in my living room

Thanks Vlad.

How was that a good pitch?

FUCKFUCKFUCKITYFUCK
RRS RRS RRS RRS RRS RRS RRS RRS RRS RRS RRS RRS RRS RRS RRS
Thanks for the walk

BRING IN RRS NOW

GOTTA WALK THE WORLD BRB
FUCKING HELL

Who didn’t see that coming?

RRS in Game Over
PLEASESAVEMEHYPHEN
Ball 4.

Nailbiting time.

If we lose you have approximately an 8 hour head start
GOOD NOOZE

RRS

We believe in you hyphen
another walk, we aren't winning this
Morrow still sucks
Should've walked Vlad anyway, right?
oh fuck me

THANK GOD HYPHEN

Big Fucker....

came in and walked the world.

Leverage Index: 6.97
I can't take this shit.
OY OY OY

FUCK ME HARD

cmonnnnnnn Hyphen
Where's the superhypen picture?

Post it!

They have one hit in this inning
Holy shit balls please don't let this stoic bastard beat us.
I have gone beyond GTE here.

I don’t even know what to type any more.

who is dying here?
BULLPEN MANAGMENT NOT AS BAD AS ORIGINALLY THOUGHT

BUT STILL WHAT THE FUCK

Super Hyphen!
If you're gonna walk the walk

you better talk the…..fuck YOU MORROW AND LOWE

jeezus

NOW IS NOT THE TIME FOR FUNGO
save us RRS
I understand the Morrow BB but what the fuck was up with Lowe?
WTF was Mac THINKING bringin in Lowe? Ugh.
It was a good decision
Mac actually made a good decision.

Just didn’t work out.

HYPHEN!!!!
I FUCKING HATE EVEREYTHING IN THE WORLD

STOP PLAYING WITH MY FUCKING HEAD!

And rally cap one
Having the JJ fungo bat ad seems like taunting.

F you, FSN NW.

I can't deal with this
Hyphen goggles of justice... GOOO
Based on small sample size

Morrow can throw strikes with off speed, not with fastball

We will win this guys.

We will win because I know we will win.

I can feel my pulse in my ears...
Please

Dont hit it to LF.

MORE BENDY THINGS RRS
love that pitch
Niiiice 2 more to go
The Angels are boned now.
GO AUSSIE GO
THROW ANOTHER CURVE
Nice swing fagmo!
AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE
COME ON RRS!

THROW THAT CURVE IN THE DIRT!!

RRS made GA look bad

“that was easy”

Please please please god
1-2

Having a heart attack brb

Keep em coming
FUCK FUCK FUCK COME ON RRS
whoops

spelled strike wrong

Why did we not PH hunter?
He's at disneyland?
He's on deck?
Anderson is clutch
That foul gave me ten heart attacks
I literally pissed
Hahahaha easy win easy win
oh gawd...

that one scared me

BLOW HIM AWAY UP AND IN
whens

football season start?

TOO SCARY COME ON AUSSIE
YES

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

FUCKING SERIOUS BULLSHIT
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME
What. The. Fuck.
WHAT THE FUCK????
MIKE REILLY!
SERIOUSLY
FUCK MIKE REILIY
Mike Reilly again!
Are you kidding.
HORSESHIT FUCK YOU

DRINK MY SHIT

FUCK MIKE REILLY
FUCK MIKE REILLY
Mike Fucking Reilly
FUCK MIKE REILLY
FUCK THESE FUCKING PIG UMPS GOD DAMN MAKE THE CALL
FUCK THAT

He went

Damn it, Neihaus
The goggles! They do everything!
What does Mike Reilly want from us, blood?
FUCK MIKE REILLY

THANK GOD FOR RRS!!

MY OH MY!!!!!!
OHMYGODILOVEYOUHYPHENLETMEHAVEYOURBABIES!
SIT THE FUCK DOWN!!!!! BITCH
Oi Oi Oi!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BOOM

Suck it, Angels!

This is intense!

YEEEEESSSSSS

M's WIN??????

WOOOOOO

SIT THE FUCK DOWN
YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHh

“AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE”

-Dave Sims

Take that

Reilly you piece of shit.

RRS YOU'RE A FUCKING HERO!!!!
OH MY GOD I NEED LIKE 5 SPARE HEARTS
K!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Home plate ump gave us a makeup call.
Not at all...

That pitch was a strike. Look at it on gameday.

Looked like a strike to me.
It was close. I assumed if it was close the ump would give it to us
That was a perfect pitch
Well I mean I thought it looked good but regardless I felt that if that ump saw one that was close he was calling strike 3 regardless
I don't care how questionable that last one was he went. Thatta baby RRS
AND FUCK YOU MIKE REILLY
not sure they needed 3 pitchers for that

but ok

Where is the Super Hyphen pick?

Someone post it dammit

RRS for President

Oh wait he’s austrailian.

RRS for Governor!
He's still more qualified than the other 3
You have an intriguing sense of how government works.
WHEW!!!!!!

That was way too close!

Christ that was digusting. What the hell was Anderson even doing.
LOS-ANGELES-ANGELS-OF-FUCKTOWN

YOU HAVE BEEN HYPHENATEDDD

Damn.

Perfect pitch.

AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE
FUCK YES!

I WANT HYPHEN INSIDE ME. I’M GOING TO FUCKING KILL MORROW ND LOWE, BUT GODDAMN, I AM GOING TO FORNICATE WITH HYPHEN ALL FUCKIBG NIGHT LONG>

Over the top.
Why is it that non-Jeff people think they're allowed to make rules?
Not making rules; just a statement.
Why is it that non-Jeff people insist on having opinions?
Because they were inexplicably taught that their opinions matter

I’m such as a student of the technical humanities you know this one better than I though.

I'm sure.

Balls

I am amused.
Fuck you in the eye
Oh. You.
I am not sure I'm sober enough to effectively verbally spar with you

So instead I’ll make a passing remark about Iowa.

Iowa fucked your mom! Hah!

I did not notice this comment until now.

Cherish your irrelevance.

I respectfully disagree
You saw Forgetting Sarah Marshall didnt you
oddly enough, no
I just saw that. Too many dick shots
Wasn't as good as Superbad or Knocked up

or definately not 40 year old virgin, but it had its funny moments. Didn’t need to see that guy’s penis several times though.

I totally get amnesty.

Also, 6.9 leverage index.

I NEED TO SHOWER
And that brings me to my next point...

Don’t do crack.

Son of a bitch. Wow, what a game. GO MARINERS!!
RYAN, THAT WAS A NICE CLIMAX

HEHEHE

Pardon me while I clean my pants.
RRS DOES NOT HAVE THE MINDSET FOR HIGH LEVERAGE SITUATIONS
I'd have sex with RRS. There, I said it.
Let's not do that again.
Woooooooo

I can bathe!

So we're back to two games back
I AM GLAD THAT I DO NOT HAVE TO MAKE A DIARY ABOUT HOW MIKE REILLY RAPES LITTLE CHILDREN
AND PUPPIES
YES PUPPY RAPE IS TERRIBLE
BUT MIKE REILLY DOES IT DURING GAMES
I KNOW I SAW EARLIER
AND IT WAS A REALLY REALLY CUTE PUPPY TOO AND I COULD HEAR IT WHINING
AND PANTING
AND IT SOMEHOW LOOKED UP WITH IT'S TEARY EYES RIGHT INTO REILLY'S LAUGHING FACE.
Not if they deserve it.
Or if they're asking for it by wearing a skirt.
Wait, puppies in skirts?

What kind of dog wears a skirt.

the kinds with owners as messed up as these?

why?

That was fun.
Or death inducing

I can’t stop shaking

You're not alone
Yeah but now you feel good right?

Hell, it’s 1 am here and I got game 4 of the Finals tomorrow and I’m fucking stoked!

HYPHEN BETTER BE CLOSER TIL PUTZ GETS BACK!!
I think he's back Tuesday

Mariners are off tomorrow

Well, there you go.
Has RRS gotten a pieface yet?
Yes, Texas last year
Do you keep track of that?
It was easy to remember, JJ did the honors
I think Morrow showed some composure

he didn’t throw a wild pitch, so things are looking great for the team

My heart....

Apparently McLaren feels the need to put our cardiovascular systems through wars.

Oh man, it was a ghost! Did you see it? Did you see the ghost?
Aussies sound so hot.
Sweet tits my aorta is sticking out of my body
I think after the Adam Wainwright game

nothing baseball related can kill my heart.

Wait...it's not supposed to do that?
Brad Adams voice cracked on the air twice

furthering my theory that’s he actually 14 years old.

three. four. FIVE times

get some puberty Brad.

I hear its overrated
Goodbye to Rex Hudler until August

Assuming we get the M’s feed when they come visit us

Thank god for that!
He's an utter atrocity
Throwing a changeup

on a 3-2 count with the bases loaded in a 4-2 game in the 9th.

Hyphen has fucking balls of steel.

Gameday is saying slider, and showing perfect location on the outside corner.

It was a superb pitch from a player who is proving that he has what it takes to get results in high leverage situations.

You're right.

Hyphen is saying slider too. Even gutsier.

Balls of fucking kryptonite.

RYAN FUCKING ROWLAND SMITH

EAT IT ANAHEIM

hey guys, I’m home, and clearly, I turned on the TV just in time.

Jiminy Christmas

Tuned in in 8th. Nice to win on strike four.

Fuck plain

Peanut M&Ms

Word.

Peanut is the way to go.

So anyone want to explain why Hunter wasn't PH'ing?
He took a day off with the rally monkey

and went to disneyland.

Not man enough.
Garrett

is a seasoned vet that’s been thru the wars?

If we were Angels fans

do you have any idea how pissed off we’d be about that?

If we were Angels fans we'd be too stupid to notice
Do the angels disappoint

as often as the Mariners though?

Hopefully they're agonizing over it right now.
Ding ding ding
But seriously,

GARRETT ANDERSON IS THE FACE OF THE FRANCHISE WHO HAS SEEN COMBAT ON MULTIPLE OCCASIONS

No doubt we were saving him for Kotchman.

After all, Anderson’s a veteran of da warz.

Anaheim clearly thought Hyphen was some loser lefty like Matt Thornton

They clearly thought wrong.

Was I the only one

who wasn’t worried?

Yes

Once again proving that you are totally insane

I’m insane??

Yes
That's funny, coming from you.
Wait, I don't get it.

Are you trying to say that Graham is insane, and you are not? Let’s run through this one more time.

That's exactly what an insane person would say though
Of course I am.
What
How is Graham

not insane?

How is he insane?

And congratulations, you know how to use italics.

He generally greets new members

with an evil greeting of doom?

I personally find his greetings charming.
Graham had me at hello
How does evil greeting=insanity?
You should be nice to people you don't know?
Why?
Because. It's called basic

human courtesy.

But most people are retarded. People should have to earn your respect

It shouldn’t just be expected.

This is one of those things you're taught as a kid that's wrong
It doesn't exist, but if the kid wants to be

an idealist, let him be.

It's better not to jerk him around.
Why? He ain't your kid.
Doesn't. Fucking. Exsist.
You'll notice that I'm courteous until someone annoys me
So, joining the blog annoys you?
Probably that rather arrogant comment

about you being able to answer any questions about the Mariners. Respect is demanded, it’s earned.

People's stupid bullshit annoys him.
JI gets it
So does your mum

Everynight

My father is a virile man
I reallt think the kid should listen to

George Carlin’s post 80s cranky old man phase. It’s fucking funny, freely available on teh internets, and it will teach him a lot about life.

"It's Bad For Ya"? Great routine.

And totally calls out all the stupid fucking self-esteem BS we’ve tried to force down kids throats that has led to the exact opposite.

The best one ever is

You Are All Diesaed(?), where he opens with the airport security rant, and finished with “Religion Is Bullshit”. It is literally the best thing ever. But they’re all really fucking awesome.

Oh yeah. There isn't a single bad Carlin album.

Man’s a genius.

One that goes underappreciated that I really like is “A place for my stuff” with the interview with Jesus.

Haven't heard that one.

His other airplane rant is really fuckin’ funny too.

The 16 minute version is the best one
"Basic human courtesy"

is an artificial construct designed to maintain insitutional predominance while simultaneously suppressing emotional and intellectual expression.

Why?

Probability says that the overwhelming majority of the people you meet will be stupid.

Case in point
Misanthropy is not the same as insanity

Me: I don’t like people.
Insane: The penguins! They run rampant! The East Coast Bias has sent them to steal my socks. I KILL YOU

I still don't get it.

You’re not insane and Graham is? Is that the gist of it?

And the answer you're expecting is...?
Yes

my heart rate has yet to return to normal

Kenji Jojima has Back Spasms
That's because we were watching the game while you were playing with glitter
Nah, it's just because

I remain calm through problematic issues.

Well that explains the constant failure...
Somebody's has forgotten about his entire career on LL
Oh, and what a career it's been
Well it's different when like 15 people gang up on me.
You see, you've got to ask yourself

“Why do people gang up on me?” And the answer is not because we’re all wrong.

I'm

always right.

There's your problem.
Can anyone find that diary where Coach introduced himself to LL

And said he’d be able to answer any question we had about the Mariners?

How did I miss this?
I can't find it

Fuck SBN 2.0’s search ‘capability’

You're looking for Will Thompson (sp?) not Coach right?
No thats a coach moment
God I wish I'd come to LL

upon its creation. I’ve missed so many great Coach moments.

He's been here since october 2006ish

After he got banned from ussm

This happened?

How could you not send me the link. Dude’s got his own wang in the LLHOF.

Because I can't fucking find it
I deleted it. Muhahahahaha!
Way to stay calm ya drunk
I'm perfectly calm, Jeff.
I don't know why

But I have this mental picture of you as that Artificial Intelligence from Close Encounters

Ah. Pussied your way out of it.
Wrong. I simply solved a problem.
What
It was a problem for my status here.

So I solved it.

You don't have a status here
How bout "Pending"
Unintentional jester?
I'm a cult hero, Jeff. I'm surprised you

haven’t realized that.

Like Ed Wood?

Or Joe Don Baker?

MITCHELL
These guys couldn't shake a trolley!
A prepubescent Don Quixote
I can't wait 'til you grow up

And the ATF raids your compound to seize your stockpile of “heavy weaponry”

Literally. Like, 100LB per sword heavy.
Heroes are generally respected.

You’re more like a cult whipping-boy.

I think it only served to enhance your status here
Hahaha

Good thing you dodged that bullet, it might’ve made people think you were stupid.

You can't delete diaries.
What
Copycat.
Graham's a copycat then too.
Liar
You like being weird, don't you?
Yes. No. I don't know. Maybe.
Oh no!

He called you weird! What are you going to do about it? If somebody called me weird, I’d just die. Seriously.

Oh crap I guess I'm dying then
Sarcasm! I love it!
So do I that's why I used it.
The penguins! They run rampant!
I remember it too

But it was ages ago….no idea what thread it might be in.

You sir, are the most mature person I have ever met.

I find myself basking in the wisdom of your gentle, aurific words on a daily basis. Please, continue sharing your enlightment with the rest of us.

No, that's like the definition of a problematic issue
Okay, problematic issues

during the Mariner games.

Don't you go into all-caps mode because of time zones?

Or was that some other completely fucking crazy kid?

John Olerud Sucks?
You? Calm? What?
You're what, 14?

Not throwing a hissy when people refuse to read your lame poetry doesn’t count as a “problematic situation.”

No that's me
Oh, yeah, uh...You're poetry's really...great.

Nice use of the, uh, symbolism. Really got the point across.

I know he only threw one

but I’m liking Morrow’s breaking pitch so far

So I read this in the story about A-Rod

getting hurt…... when did Ichiro not start a game this year?

Rodriguez began the afternoon as one of only two AL players to start every game, along with Josh Hamilton of Texas.

RRS on postgame sez:

“I have one more save than JJ!”

HAHA!

Nice job Mariners.

I will now consume only half of the beer at my disposal.

So we ended up losing the series by two feet :(
You're assuming our bullpen could have held...
balls of steel

what a fucking pitch for the K! holy crap.

This was like the inverse of Friday's game
Picture of Doom Slider:

http://blog.seattletimes.nwsource.com/mariners/angells3%20030.jpg

Geoff Baker is fast and good.

Frame that picture and send it RRS
not sure what that picture shows...

Anderson hasn’t gone around yet, and the perspective makes it difficult to see where the pitch is. It could even be lying on the ground a few feet outside of the batter’s circle.

Who cares what it shows

We won. So it’s cool.

The end

I see Luke Hochevar got destroyed by the River Cats
Is Angie Mentink gone because she's pumping out another unit?

I thought she was just getting fat, this huge stomach looked different.

she's usually off

on the weekends.

So she is just getting fat?
Of course

Manmilk has tons of calories.

Krueger's manmilk?

Added calories from all the grease.

MacNaughton's has never tasted so good.
Can people please stop trolling

on Halo’s Heaven? It’s lame, and it validates them. Why stoop to their level?

Agreed

I’m not going to go over to HH, but if you could give me the names of the people trolling, I’d appreciate it.

Some guy called althemarinerfan

I’ve seen Coach there from time to time, although not recently, and usually not really trolling.

He's in this thread
"although not recently"
Ha

I read that wrong. I thought he said he’s seen alt here from time to time, but not recently.

Uh oh

Someone’s in trouble.

GRAHAM DID IT

I JUST STOOD THERE AND WATCHED

They're your fingerprints
None of them post on LL.

Well they might, and those are alternative usernames, but you’d need their IPs.

“almarinersfan”
“Go Manures”

Make that "althemarinerfan" and he indeed has been posting here.

Douchebucket.

He won't be posting here for long.
Seriously, we should just not care about anything HH does.

You shouldn’t read HH, much less post there.

If I want to read somthing tantamount to intellectual rape

I’ll read the National Enquirer. There’s no reason to read HH, let alone troll them.

National Enquirer>HH
World Weekly News > Halos Heaven
It's like watching a train wreck

I don’t want to see, but I can’t look away.

Okay, I'm sick of this analogy

everybody always wants to see a train wreck. Nobody wants to look away. People are sick.

It's like 2girls1cup

You’re curious because everybody keeps talking about it, but in the end you will end up having nightmares in a pool of your own vomit.

Much better analogy

Tubgirl works as well, but it’s become too much of a cliche.

I heard about it

And I’m not curious at all. That is just too much for me.

Too true

Although I find their flailing to be humorous every once in a while, as a pick-me-up.

I laughed hysterically when I saw that.

And I also thought…what could she have eaten to produce such a massive movement.

agreed, it's pointless
What I think some people don't get is....

That by trolling Halo’s Heaven you actually become WORSE than they do since as bad as they are over there they don’t flood Lookout Landing whenever the Angels beat the Mariners. Sure we’re all over anyone who even SMELLS like an Angels fan when we lose but still….

Optimist is a classy guy

But yeah, trolling Halos Heaven is pretty low.

Which is why I don't do it anymore.
No one's accusing you.
Just pointing it out, buddy.
He needs constant validation and this is the only community that has come close to accepting him.

Textbook, really.

I'm sure Detectovision would take him in
Think she'll be sad enough after the game to want to drown her sorrows with a comforting presence?

which one?
I think he means the one in the white hat.
That would be a boy.

I’m talking about the girl with the cleavage and red Angels cap.

The hot one, not the mom.

I’d have to hide my Mariners pillow though.

No, maybe she knows to be subserviant

to the superior M’s fans.

Just caught up.

Wow, that ending was awesome. Unnecessarily nerve-wracking but awesome.

HOLY HELL

that was awesome.

Adam Jones

had the #2 web gem on BT. :(

Who are the two douchebags

who keep trolling HH?

DUCKS LOSE

DUCKS LOSE DUCKS LOSE DUCKS LOSE AHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA

Fuck you Emilio!
The flying L!!!!

You must Login with your SB Nation account and be a member of Lookout Landing to post a comment.