Lookout Landing

any chance FSN will waive the rights

to all our Sims’ hat screen shots?

The article was bad

But it’s not ‘Holy shit did he just go out of his way to call the best hitter of all time a non-’gamer’?’ bad.

Yeah, but Woddy Paige writes for an actual fucking newspaper.

and say what you want about the gamer thing, at least its an ethos. The Paige article was just a page and a half of nosense, no point, barely a thesis, and a bunch of faux clever puns. at least the gamer article TRIED.

Well, I've watched a lot of ATH

I expected nothing less from Paige than straigjht nonsense with no clear meaning. I suppose it’s got a lot to do with my expectations of Paige’s writing.

Of course, I did expect much from Iggy and Papa Bear, either, but that just blew me away with stupidity.

The server is dieing.

Good news for Voltron

The two things alive I want dead in that pic

Valle and Sims’ hat.

Sims has done worse:

Tonight on a very special "What's Happening!!!": Rerun helps a plane do an emergency landing

I like Sims' hat.

I have a similar one I wear to gigs.

Okay, the techies are looking into the lag issue

it's fine for me now

KKKKKK!!!

nasty slider

God.

That took me forever to get in this thread.

Looks like things have sped back up a decent amount

KKKKKK

1 more innning from Felix hopefully

Felix and Webb copying each other tonight.

I have them both on my fantasy team - I should be doing a lot better tonight=/

Jordan of Boise - April 22, 2008 reply

So offense, yeah.

By the way, in case you're concerned about Felix's command tonight

he’s really sick. So that’ll do a number on your performance.

that would explain the mclaren visit over Mel

Webby does have a double, 2 RBI, and a run scored.

Bah, that was supposed to be in responce to Jordan.

You and your sources

RUNS PLEASE!

kthxbye

first pitch swinging kicks ass!

Gritty out for Willie

My god does Mike Keenan loves changing goalies

4 straight goals

radio off, season over

Sorry, dude

The Sharks are the last team I care about that are still in it

Jesus christ

Guthrie has thrown 52 pitches you douchebags, take a goddam pitch.

Didn't Guthrie do this to us last year?

"Coming up on FSN: the latest on Shaun Alexander's status with the Seahawks"

6 hours isn’t enough time to record a timely promo?

unemployed?

Kenji gets the hit, but it doesn't excuse back-to-back first pitch swings.

Yuni is tiring me out

The Sharks are kind of dominating

just a tad

It looks like the rout is on

Fuck no no not a hit and run with Kenji

goddamn you dumb fucking manager

Valle: "I like that"

That’s why you’re out of a job.

That Fucking asshole

When a right handed hitter is up there is man with dark hair probably in his 50’s who keeps on waving to the camera while talking on the phone. Its going to be the end of me. Does anyone know that guy?

Yeah he reminds me a lot of that huge shit I dropped in the toilet today.

large stab picture

You know Kenji is going 3-2...

yep, thank god it was a walk

Jeremy Guthrie doesn't look Mormon enough

I don’t know what this comment means but I’m absolutely certain about it.

Perhaps it's the spray-on tan

i must have missed that one

Elder Bednar.

No relation to Erik Bedard.

Nice toupe

I found this by typing "perfect mormon" into Google's image search.

That picture is also up on the BYU.edu website at the moment.

That is very funny

Man it would suck to live in Utah.

It does.

It's ok

There are plenty of mormon here in washington as well. They are nice people…just a little too nice, you think they might have some deep dark secret. (Having multiple wives doesn’t count).

Mormons haven't practiced polygamy since the 19th century.

There are radical sects who do, but they are not in association with the 14 million worldwide membership group.

It's called FLDS

Anyone here read Under the Banner of Heaven? Jon Krakauer work.

Excellent book.

Agreed

I want to

I’m working on a big term project based on Into Thin Air and the Everest tragedy. He’s an awesome writer, so I want to check that out next.

I joke

Sorry its a stereotype I probably shouldn’t have brought up, I apologize.

No worries

I’d say it too if I wasn’t already informed that people can be offended. Mormon jokes are supreme.

Easy now.

I’m Mormon, though I swear like a drunken sailor.

I laugh.

But sometimes people don’t know the difference.

I see

But, I do have to ask in seriousness, do you have to wear special underpants?

Why is this everyone's second question?

I am sorry

I just heard mitt romney wore magical underwear, and I wondered if that applied to all mormons.

I really wish Mitt Romney had never run.

Question 3:

How can I get my own planet?

To quote Jeff

subthread closed.

Yes, I wear garments.

They beat boxers.

The only thing really special about them are stitchings for reminders. It is not much different than people who wear crosses around their necks or WWJD bracelets.

(done with religion discussion due to TOS)

One of my coworkers is a mormon AND an eskimoe.

I found this

Hits like?

“Lord forgive me for I drank caffeine”
“Oops I looked down her blouse”
“Let’s spread the love door to door”

No gay jokes?

Amazing luck.

Yuni walks?

Snaps alive.

Happy Earth Day

Mariner fans did their part by not driving to the game.

Holy shit Betancourt walked

DON’T BLOW THIS RARE OPPORTUNITY PLZ

omfg.

FUCK!

HE WAS SAFE

OoOOOoooh

WTF??

that’s a Mormon play right there

WTF

IS YOU KIDDING!@

CURSE YOU JOSEPH SMITH

Dumb da dumb dumb dumb

excellent reference

Well done

What's the score?

Gameday said it was 1-1, then 2-1 after nothing happened, and now it’s back to 1-1…

ewakio - April 22, 2008 reply

1-1

SAFE

Booooooo

Nevermind

Barely out.

Holy Shit

Guthrie did get him.

This just in.

Kenji is slow.

Offence

We fail it

Sliding there is stupid.

How is sliding there stupid?

It looked like he had him beat if he runs it out

the slide slowed him down

So you are suggesting to run through the bag at third?

Try it and let me know how that works out

When it's gonna be that close

And it’s a force out I’d go in standing up and hope I can stay on the bag, gives you a better chance than sliding there because he has to apply the tag after you beat him instead of just touching the bag, but whatever.

There's no way you could sprint to third and then hold up without coming off the bag

Stupid awesome

Pillow Vs. Pillow?

?

DEFENSE WINS CHAMPIONSHIPS!!!!

YUNI!!!

Oh shit!!!

GOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGOGO!

YUNI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YES!!!!!!

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

AAHHHHahaaaaaaahhHHHH!!!!!!

Betancourt

Is a sexy rounded beast!

WOOOOOO

YUNI

AHAAHAHHA and he blew it!

Yuni ran the stop sign!!

YUNI FTW!!!!

HJGKDSFGJKHFGJKHGFKj!!!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

God damn Kenji is slow.

OMG YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

YUNI!

Walk, the scored on error

Whoooooo

~~BAD~~ GOOD BASERUNNING

we dont need a third base coach

SCORE YUNI HAS BETTER JUDJEMENT

BWAAAAAA

HE RAN THROUGH THE STOP SIGN! AND SCORED!! HO HO!!

Oh Sims, you slay me.

Run, Yuni, you crazy son of a bitch!

HAHAHA FUCK YES YUNI I LOVE YOU

HAVE MY BABIES!!!!!

That was pretty funny Yuni

Sam: ::gets up to show the stop sign::
Felix: SIT THE FUCK DOWN!

Jordan of Boise - April 22, 2008 reply

That

failed.

Fuck you

Well he's right

No thanks.

But give EnglishMariner a call.

saves picture for future use

win

Felix is pumped!

HAHAHAHA WEEEEEEEEEE!

excellent call by Sims

that was absolutely classic

agreed

I love how genuinely surprised he was that Yuni was running through the stop sign.

Sims is just so awesome.

Fuck off perlozzo!

Man, there's something about the brunette woman

in the Comcast commercial…she’s hot.

I like the blonde who is a "VIP".

PhilKenSebben - April 22, 2008 reply

Yeah, she's alright, too.

But I like brunette’s more.

she has quite a forehead.

PhilKenSebben - April 22, 2008 reply

I wonder if Sims has ever seen someone run through a stop sign before

He probably does it all the time.

and not get his ass thrown out?

I would think not.

I love how Sims isn't solely a baseball guy

it brings an otherwise unique perspective to the broadcast.

OAK ahead now...

Gameday = fucked up tonight.

All season*

Gameday has had a high failure rate this season.

ok, true

I just can't listen to the game tonight with math homework going on in my apartment.

Headphones

can't find 'em

Check your backpack.

Luke Scott and Felix both need to do something good for my fantasy team

Where’s the production, Luke?

Quick inning Felix...need to go 7 IP...

It was a third straight failure for

...the baseball ninja

more bendy balls weeee

Dude, I swear they were this big—aaand we’re back from our break,. Now the time to answer that Aflac trivia question.

It wasn't THAT great a pitch

i do love

the felix curve

I don't love that one

OMG

someone get a screengrab of JJ talking to that “Sherriff”

There are two Sheriff's in the Mariner bullpen

i lol'd

PhilKenSebben - April 22, 2008 reply

FUCK

Aw fuck it all.

fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck

Argh.

mmmmm fuck

fuck this shit

way to give it back

crap crap crap

aubrey huff

die in a fire

FUCK.

Sucky

they threw it back-nice

disagree

How fucking original.

throwing it back never gets old.

Wrong

...

fuck me

fuck your couch, aubrey huff

unless the Orioles score again...

it’s gonna be a long night folks

What if the Mariners score again?

2-2

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

This is an appropriate response

we already had our miracle last inning

Bendy thing too.

Nothing Felix could do about that .

Pretty awful location for a 1-2 pitch

I take that back, it wasn't awful

but it should’ve been lower or more inside.

That's what, uhhh...

Take backs are for pussys

Pussies cannot be undid

I'm pretty damn sure that there are doctors who make a lucrative living proving you wrong

To be one of those doctors

I'd have a hard time not considering my work to be a god damn shame

You could cry about it on top of your piles and piles of money next to your harem of beautiful women

I guess I'd never have to worry about being tempted to sleep with my patients

Or wouldn't you?

...

My attorneys have advised me not to make any comments at this time

I regret that Coach / Corco isn't here for this sub-thread.

I'm not entirely sure that Coach would know what the hell we're talking about

That's a given.

Which makes things 5 times more awesome

Let's not hang out

Wise move

Yeah, it wasn't a terrible pitch.

It coulda been out of the zone a bit more, but it certainly wasn’t a hanger

maybe not throw 3 or 4 in a row

He could only just tip his cap

Felix is still having a good outing, he needs some fucking run support.

You know

since game one Betancourt’s throws have looked significantly better.

Raul tried

a Beltre dance.

hey Raul's back everyboddy

Where the hell has the offense gone?

Atleast we're not losing.

Paula Cole?

i don't wanna wait for felix's moundtime to be over. I want to score a run before he leaves.

I can't believe only 5 innings have gone by.

You’d think Tits was pitching

APPEAL!

What the hell Beltre!!!

Ahhh

APPEAL AND FAIL!

I want to see

Beltre, with two strikes, check his swing on a pitch that gets past the catcher. Catcher doesn’t make the appeal, Beltre does, ump says he swung, Beltre takes first. Then I forgive him for all his past appeals.

Erasmus - April 22, 2008 reply

I think all the bats are sick too

hats for bats, keep bats warm

Ugghhhh.

Good thing Beltre appealed that strike

haha

Jesus Christ Beltre

Stop fucking swinging at everything

Felix @ 100 pitches

and I’ll bet he’s sent back out there for the 7th anyways…

That will greatly upset me if true.

If the M's take the lead, I doubt it

if they don’t, I imagine he’ll be sent back out there in the hopes of a quick 1-2-3.

What about flu-like symptoms?

Here comes the embarrassing strikeout.

Doesn't Guthrie know he needs to throw low and away to get KA to swing?

TrashiDawa - April 22, 2008 reply

Or Bendy thing.

appropriate

link

damn

http://www.moviesoundscentral.com/sounds/major_league/outside.wav

Hmm?

I just saw a black power sign

Fuck, Mexico City, 1968 again…

Vidro is now 0 for 3

this thread can now go into a flood of Bonds Photoshops

You're gonna have to do better than that to keep your job, Turbo

Jeremy Guthrie's asian, right?

sweet left-handed stroke!

Fuck you Vidro

Quit hitting the ball in the air fatboy.

Felix back in

Was anyone even warming up in the pen?

No

This is what pisses me off

If you’re going to send Felix out back out there @ 100 pitches, at least have someone ready to come in.

No but we got a big redhead that everyone loves.

Just sitting there tonight.

Geena Davis?

In a league of her own

Cactus League, to be exact.

That guy booing

is great.

i was saying boo urns

Love the guy booing Vidro.

Nice

I am going to boo Vidro next time I go to the game, which happens to be against our Hated Rivals, the San Diego Padres.

YOU ARE NOT A POWER HITTER

YOU ARE A BAD HITTER

Frank Thomas, anyone?

vidro = very poor man’s edgar

Ummmmmmmmm

Bizarro Edgar

Vidro, in no way, equals any part of Edgar even remotely

itsajokesilly

Okay, gotcha :)

Not funny >:(

I love Edgar

I [enter antonym for love] Vidro.

agreed wholeheartedly

very poor man’s edgar > vidro.

gtfo

Edgar -> Poor man's Edgar -> Dumpster Diving Edger -> Vidro

"Edger"

Nice.

Fuck

Vidro = Very poor man's Angie Mentik

WINNER

War Veteran warming up.

Rhodes warming up.

Oh noes

Any updates on Bedard and Putz?

Putz is back

He’s active for this game. Bedard still out, possibly back for game 3 of the series but who knows

As a matter of fact, he's probably for Thursday

Not getting hopeful, but at least it’s there.

Probable*

I think he is probably going to pitch saturday.

thanks, good news.

Rally Fry pandering hits an all time low:

What the hell is she going to do in Iraq

Dudes

Fair enough

She's gonna go look for a husband.

bad form, Jack

I thought they were deserved

Jack?

and buh?

Hook

www.en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Popper

That song has the most clever and self-referential lyrics in history.

And a guy worth 2 Vidros wrote it.

Popper

probably beats Vidro to 1st, don’t ‘cha think?

GothamMariner - April 22, 2008 reply

Popper and Vidro

Everytime Popper performs a virtuosic harmonica solo, Vidro digests a harmonica.

good form

I have no idea what the sub-thread means.

Get in line

First!

wait….

Hook

The movie

Haven't seen it since I was 7.

That's a good thing.

That movie hasn’t stood the test of time very well.

Hmm

Now that I look at it all in context (or lack thereof) I see what you mean

Its a movie...

Hook… Robin Williams… Dustin Hoffman… Rufio

It really does give the concept a bad name

I think I have enough of these to make a

“The Douche Bags of Rally Fires” calendar.

Guthrie looks stoned

He hung out with Weaver on 4.20

Still recovering.

Felix beats Chuck Norris

He kills cockroaches.

Fuck you, Roberts.

Sit your non-ranging-to-your-left ass down

Sit, fuckstick

K!!

He was wrong... that was the 7th K right?

Squinty is ready to punt this game away

Rhodes?

Louie, Louie

I ♥ Felix.

I feel a LL bustedtee coming on.

I think we should all wear these to the USSM/LL event.

Or Quiet Riot

Doesn't have his stuff

gets squeezed, really sick…yet somehow Felix still has a good outing.

You’re awesome, King.

Nice work, King.

Awesome, awesome changeup today

How the fuck did Felix get through 7 innings?

It's freakin' King Felix, man!

I know

He had like 50+ pitches under his belt through 2.

Mac slipped Felix some Pepto in the 2nd inning.

Wow did Felix recover from innings 1-2 in amazing form

He's, uh, Felix.

Duh!

So who gets called up

If Wilkerson is out? Jimmerson, Sardinha, or Saunders?

Malcontent1 - April 22, 2008 reply

Jimerson was DFA'd.

I thought Jimerson was in Tacoma.

Did he clear waivers?

I know not.

he is, but dropped from the 40-man

Jimerson's in Tacoma. He's still availible (although it isn't happening).

available*

Re-signed him to a Minor League deal.

He’s back in Tacoma.

Wlad?

Please?

Wlad is bruised

he won’t be up for at least a couple weeks more

Malcontent1 - April 22, 2008 reply

Whoops forgot about that.

Reed?

Yeah

It would probably be Reed

Reed is slugging .379

Wilk with D?

Malcontent1 - April 22, 2008 reply

Better than Wilk with Wilk

If Wilkerson is DL'ed

I can see Wlad coming up to play every day.

That would rule.

Don't forget, Wlad is already hurt himself

woot for felix

Please get that man a run and a beer.

Amen

Hail Hail

HOCKEY!

I'm so happy that I have a reason to watch the next round

And hopefully several more rounds after that

If I start thinking like that I'll just have my heart broken again

You can't break what's already broken

Just give yourself time to heal, Jeff

Don’t worry. You’ll get your groove back in no time.

Classic Sexson

I want the funk.

Felix gonna pitch the 8th?

Uhhhhhhh

Felix over 100 pitches > Rhodes

long term!

I suppose

still, this could suck

Really?

Please god no....

110 pitches?! Would be nice to have Felix for the rest of the season and not ruin him this early

Dusty Baker?

C'mon Cunningham!

FISTER

Funny story me and Doug were on the same high school baseball team.

CstSnow - April 22, 2008 reply

Again, fuck you Millar.

Fuck you, Millar

C'mon Joh

juuuuuust a bit outside

http://www.moviesoundscentral.com/sounds/major_league/outside.wav

Yup

yeah, i don’t think these links have worked since Google was a twinkle in Larry and Sergie’s eye.

Sorry about that. lol.

Way to score runs guys

What does Felix have to do

to get some run support

and oh shit here comes Rhodes.

Go to the NL and Bat for himself?

He can just pinch hit for Vidro.

If we're going to lose this

I’d rather Felix not get saddled with the L.

Rhodes in, game over.

Has a much different meaning than, Putz in, game over.

To be fair

I realize Rhodes is a veteran, meaning he is crippled and can’t pitch, but he hasn’t been so bad so far, should we be so harsh on him now, or should we wait until he does show his veteran crappyness.

Rhodes in

game over?

Thanks for making that play during the ASG dude

Brian fucktard Roberts

Seriously?

You might need more HGH to field the next grounder, doucheface.

M's have scored 15 runs in the 37.2 innings Felix has pitched

That's utterly reprehensible

And unforgivable.

Hey Safeco, be emptier

is attendance sucking this year or at least tonight?

i hope not

Kids are still in school

Plus it's as cold as a fucking bastard here right now.

And our only home series have been Texas, KC, LAnaheim (which was pretty well attended)

and Baltimore tonight

Don't forget about American Idol!

:D

:o

:(

That would explain that then

I hate that people are going to be talking about the trash at work tomorrow

Your coworkers sound like tools

My apologies

Most of the white ones are

fuck children

No it leads to children.

No, that would lead to prison

and/or an appearance on “To Catch a Predator”

Naw

27k+

Plus…
(kids still in school)
Weather sucks
And the weather sucks

Ah, a classic.

Someone should revise this.

yea, to Squinty.

Precisely.

Morrow warming up

let’s double our fun

Uhm

Why Rhodes? Why Morrow?

Time to put RRS back on the milk carton

I'm partial to Graham's very English missing postuer myself...

This is not a good time for pussy hits

92? Really?

I thought that was gonna be another pussy hit.

Screw the Greeks

Yes, bring Morrow in after the bases are loaded.

I'm hoping you're BSing

because with gameday being behind, I can’t tell.

These pitches do not look like 93 mph.

ITS A CONSPIRACY TO MAKE HIM LOOK NOT WASHED UP

Rhodes has been locating these fastballs damn well

93? Really?

quite possibly

Rhodes still has some gas I must say.

94? Come on!

94?

94!

"When the money is on the line Arthur Rhodes has preformed well in the past"

There are so many things wrong with this statement.

That was weird

Rhodes just followed a 93mph fastball with an 88mph fastball.

Cutter?
2 seam?
Split?
Radar gun fixed?

Lined into DP

DP!!

Awesome.

Double play woooooo!

Works for me

We needed that

Lined into DP.

Yuni says fuck it I'll do it myself.

Unassisted bitches!

"Rhodes has performed in the past"

Clearly, we decide not to count the LCS as the past.

I love balls stroked to Yuni

I love balls all over Yuni

Mmmmmmmmm

I love stroking my balls to Yuni

funk DP?

Pussy hit negated

Ha ha

Sucky managing benefits us for a change

Wait

Why is there only 1 rbi even though there are two runs?

Scored on the botched throw to 1st

Yuni scored on an error.

Beltre charged with an error.

Second TOUR OF DUTY

Alright

So maybe Rhodes no longer personifies doom….

Copy & Paste what I said earlier

To be fair, I realize Rhodes is a veteran, meaning he is crippled and can’t pitch, but he hasn’t been so bad so far, should we be so harsh on him now, or should we wait until he does show his veteran crappyness.

I'm just so used to his past, and a bias against old guys coming back from major surgery

But he’s been pretty solid so far.

uhhh

the only reason he did well the last time out was because of a screaming line drive hit right to Beltre.

K!!!

Rhodes wooooo?

Yeah

doesn’t really sound right does it?

I AM TOTALLY TRIPPING BALLS RIGHT NOW

Rhodes

Freakin heck, that was nice.

K!

He’s BEEN THROUGH WARS!!!

Rhodes woo?

Rhodes hasn't been bad this year...so far

But, he looks pretty good.

K

Wow, nice work arthur

is he wearing those magical earrings. Fuck you Omar Vizquel!

New from Olive Garden: 5th Meal.

You mean Taco Bell?

That's 4th meal.

But when you have the craving for something oily, undercooked, and utterly without flavor, only one thing will suffice…FIFTH MEAL.

I'll admit it

I’m beginning to think that Rhodes could be okay.

Same.

And fuck, he's looking just a

little better than EOF so far.

Agreed

The girl in the Chevy commercial has a great ass.

I want to eat pancakes off it

Then lick all the syrup off.

Hoooooooo baby

This would be more funny sans punctuation plus typos

Or with more Corco

to an extent

you don’t wanna to OD on Corco

it’s a very fine line

Eh stuff it McKenna.

I’ve had a computer in my own room since I was ten.

JJ's warming up

break up the rythm:

GET ON BASE

BETANCOURT HUSTLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes, go MIN

Yuni!

YUNI!!!

YUNI!!!!

FUCK YEAH

Yuni you're a madman!

SIMS AND YUNI ARE AWESOME

YUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNI

YUNI!

YUNI!!!

Bomber!

Yuni is the fucking man.

CstSnow - April 22, 2008 reply

REARRANGE

God damn it Yuni is so fun to watch play

Alrighty then,

If Guthrrie finishes this inning that will be 3 of the last 4 games tht the opposing starter has gone 8.0 innings.

Putz woo?

I LOVE YOU

My Guess

Ichiro bunts.

Yuni woo

Uhh? IBB? No?

RED!!

FUCK

Fail.

Ichi-no!

Is it just me or does Guthrie look like the long lost Carradine brother?

I can see a resemblance

Don't tell me that was a sac bunt attempt

from Ichiro.

he does that all the time

late with a runner on second.

I'd rather him try the power swing.

it was either Lou or Melvin

that used to get driven nuts by Ichiro bunting with a runner in scoring position…. then Dave Neihaus got on the bandwagon for it too.

That looked more like it was for a base hit

Fucky fucky fucky fucky fuck fuck!

ICHI...oh

....what

BURN ICHIRO!!!

Dave Sims refers to Adam Jones by first name

It’s like Adam’s a long gone boyfriend that Dave just can’t forget and get out of his head. Like, and I bet they had a song. Linger by The Cranberries. Yeah. Perfect.

Last Fan Of Jose Lopez - April 22, 2008 reply

Everyone's song is linger

Lame.

wtf Ichiro?

HR

More like Lopez single into the gap.

Wait, oxymoron much?

Ichiro channels Joh

Are the O's bringing in John Parrish on our ass?

Fuck.

fuck

Save us Raul.

god dammit

come on, Raul

Kashmir?

Beat me to it. Thanks.

Kazmir.

Nah dude, thats Puff Daddy...

Whats a Kashmir?

die

haha

So this isn't infuriating

this is one of those "why do I fucking watch this shit" games

Felix!

CLASSIC Seattle style-situational hitting

We don't deserve to win this

ralphie81 - April 22, 2008 reply

why?

I’ve never understood that particular phrase.

WTF???

Save us King Awesome.

KA time.

If Bonds was behind him

Raul would be getting fastballs right now.

Hehe

However Bonds' bad chemistry would distract Raul into a K

"Beltre's 0-12 is a lot more appealing"

That was a cute albeit inadvertent play on words.

he has been "appealing" swings to first a lot lately

Get pissed, KA!

Please shit on a pitch, Beltre.

RED!!

RED !!!

Yay RED

Sims:"Red is here, pulling for his guy."

Fuck yeah

That's fantastic!

I owe Red so many beers for the joy he brings to these games

RED!!

Sims gives a shoutout.

watch him walk

and leave it up to Turbo.

Ugh.

Yeah, then who's patronizing Turbo? Ganesh?

dave knows red by name

Diatribe - April 22, 2008 reply

That's awesome

haha, i'm trying to study

but i turn around to see the tv, and it’s Red with Giant Beltre head

LantermanC - April 22, 2008 reply

Take!!

We love you Sims.

Huh.

That was a strike?

HOW THE FUCK WAS THAT A STRIKE

this ump is retarded

LantermanC - April 22, 2008 reply

Pitch inside much?

Mr. Tracer is an infinitely better name than Joe's Tracer

Not a strike..

Oh shiz.

How the fck was that a strike?

Up to our professional hitter

Slampig ftw?

oh crap

Up to Turbo

Sad face.

So

Beltre saw 6 balls that AB

J_G - April 22, 2008 reply

and instead of norton, fatass stays up

Uh oh's.

Vidro gets a base hit here and say no to Frank Thomas

That's in writing.

I didn't mean personally

I personally want Vidro run out of fucking town, I was talking about the front office.

wait, that full count pitch that almost hit beltre

wasn’t a strike?

LantermanC - April 22, 2008 reply

Bases are loaded! For....

....um, Vidro.

turbo time

Any chance we can delay the game.

sign bonds and have him pinch hit

Bases jacked for..

....oh dear.

Well this sucks either way

Fuuuuuck

Turbo…. yay..

Do not swing

Bases loaded for Vidro....

sigh

Remember what Vince Lombardi said:

If you lose, you’re out of the family.

C'mon you fat piece of shit.

shit

a wise manager would pinch hit here

Who do we have that is capable?

Norton, I guess.

And sweet, it's all up to Bonds.

wait

WHERE THE FUCK IS BARRY LAMAR BONDS?!?!?!

If Jose Vidro doesn't come through here

Every one of my posts from now on will have the subject line as “Sign Frank Thomas”

BB...BB....BB

Is it possible to walk

and lower the team’s WE?

TURBO!!!!!!!!!!!!

what just happened?

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

SLAMPIG!!!

base hit, bitches!!!!!!!!!!

SLAMMMMMMPIG!

TURBOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

VIDRO!!!!!!!

UH OH HOT DOG!!!!!

PLU Tim - April 22, 2008 reply

TURBO!!!!!!!!

Well I guess Frank Thomas is going somewhere else

FUCK ME, and FUCK YOU VIDRO

Mariners are winning though

So I’m happy about that

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

PEPE!!

WOOOOOO!!!

Devin - April 22, 2008 reply

What?

Vidro's lefthanded twin.

Nevermind.

Devin - April 22, 2008 reply

FUCK YEAH!!!!!!

Nojf33 - April 22, 2008 reply

MAGIC HOTDOG POWAH

HA!!!

TURBO!

I'm not showing emotion.

Wha???

ralphie81 - April 22, 2008 reply

YEAHHHHH!!!!!

WOOOOOOOOOOO SLAMPIG WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

FUCK YOU BARRY

TURBO SINGLE

HOLY FUCKING BALLS.

who needs bonds

Vidro!

apigjperoeprogeprogerpgoerp PIGGY

VIDRO FUCK YESSSSSSSSSS

PEPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPEEEEEEe

LL just exploded.

TURBO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

seattlebruin - April 22, 2008 reply

Hahaha

suck it you orange fuckbirds

don gato - April 22, 2008 reply

Professional hitter at work.

Still want a better DH.

HAHA I think I just woke up my roommate

OINK OINK OINK!

We no need no Frank Thomas

(just kidding)

TURBO YEAH MY TV ISN'T BROKEN

Good to be back, sir.

Fuck Yeah

Sure is nice to see that again

YEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSS

woo-hoo!

been a while…

Oh JJ how I've missed you.

PUTZ

DOUGH BOY IS CLUTCH

SIGN FRANK THOMAS ANYWAY

Almost destroyed Beltre

OBP FTW!!!

OPS FTL!!!!

and this is why I fucking watch these games

Hopes of Turbo being replaced-dashed

Seriously though

Why the fuck was Guthrie still pitching?

Because...

He said “I got him.” in refernce to Vidro a couple times… apparently.

Three run funk blast to seal the deal?

No.

If we are going to see J.J., we want to see him close it out in proper fashion.

I'm shaking in anticipation of mr splitty and the gang

AAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHH YEAAAAH!!

I thought you wrote "Mr. Spitty"

Ew.

Vidro's unlikely hit

destroyed LL for me.

She doesn't need to use her hands at all!

The lady in the Ford commercial sounds like Kathy Griffin.

Jesus had nothing to do with Turbo's hit.

Jesus.

.....damn that's creepy.

...Why?

WTF?!?!?!

SethGrandpa - April 22, 2008 reply

Jesus, get it away from me!

:O

Never, ever post this again.

Creeeeeeepy.

aaaaah wtf

I'm shaking in anticipation too!!

Wow.

This is weird even for LL

Never post this again.

Ronald McDonald scares the shit out of me.

So many questions...

...so many answers best left unsaid...

Auto-BAN!

That's the scariest thing I've ever seen

Have you seen who our DH is?

What

OMG....

creepy as shit.

PLU Tim - April 22, 2008 reply

I set it as my desktop.

It’s so I have a constant reminder that Jesus died for my sins.

you will be going insane soon

Nobody ever answered me

Guthrie is asian right?

Yes

THANK YOU

Who the fuck knows what anyone is anymore

I’m not even sure what I am. I know I’m 1/64th gypsy

I'm half Chinese and two-thirds Scandinavian.

I'm 2/15ths American Indian.

?

You don't watch The Office.

...a third Jewish and 1/16 German

Are you a self hating...

Erm… a self hating… uhhh…

You're more than a person?

That must be awesome!

no Valle, no

Funny how Guthrie was still out there

At 110+ pitches

Seriously

Sarfate is the shit. I would be irate if I was an O’s fan.

After last years bullpen issues, I'm not surprised they're a little gunshy

Sarfate is a monster though

Awful AB there by Richie.

Wow Richie.

PUTZ IN!

GAME OVER!

PUTZ!!!!!!!!

That was easy

Sexson wants to see JJ quick too.

Putz wooooo

Good God Sarfate is terrifying

Putz is motherfucking in bitches!

Vidro and Putz share the diet of winners.

Tony S - April 22, 2008 reply

camel

toe

lol

Make me unsee it!!

Why are we getting carpet bombed with scary shit?

So can we get a temporary ban on posting pictures?

I liked it better when you had to do a bunch of HTML bullshit

it kept the n00bs at bay.

Am I the only one who's a little bit scared right now?

no.

Oh yeah Sims, the place sure is rocking.

16 thousand fans ARE GOING NUTS

Putz In. Game Over.

dbroncos31 - April 22, 2008 reply

96

I’m pleased

Safeco's 96 |= 96

96!

96 MPH... yes

98mph, 98mph

I think he’s ok

I don't

ZOOM! 98!?!?

According to gameday anyway.

Feck.

Fucking hell Raul

I want to blame this on Raul.

Fuck Raul

......

Uhh, eww

Grr

Still not worried

Huff had to reach to get that one

Damn

NOT GOOD NOT GOOD

As Charton Jimerson rots

Jezz...

Huff is anoying.

You've got this JJ

Putz nooooo

The classic JJ Putz strategy

Give them hope that you may take it away.

Rope a dope?

Yeah that was pretty lucky..

good sort of throw the bat out there and guess the timing hitting.

Watch Jones fucking belt one

I will go out and kill a Jew tonight if this prophesy is fulfilled.

What the fuck, man?

Seriously this thread has taken a pretty dark turn in the last few minutes

I would win.

GTE to the MAX!!!

breathe easy Jews

Go get them, Adolf...

I mean… what?

not cool

jksnake99 - April 22, 2008 reply

uhhhhhh

...seriously...

I thought I was the resident bigot...

Be more antisemitic

Kill a dentist?

.

What ever happened to our traditional whimsical approach to humor?

I didn't think I'd have to come up with game thread TOS, but alas...

Use the banhammer.

A comment like that earns the offender a week away from LL.

Sorry, did I say jew?

I meant to say Fall Out Boy.

Bee yew ti full

B-E-A-utiful

Back to you, fuckers

Wait, what?

This is not a sub-thread of the antisemtic remark.

Quoting a movie

Bruce Almighty…

Oh....

That split didn't look like it a ton of bite on it

Adam Jones gets a home version of the game

K!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SIT DOWN JONES!

K! FUCK YOU JONES!

EYAHAJKED

THANK YOU

K!

Fastball’s OK though

Overmatched

1 Out!

SIT THE FUCK DOWN

Bye Adam

You really suck at the plate right now

K

Nice try, Jones.

ahahahahahahaha

K

K!

FUCK YOU ADAM SIT THE FUCK DOWN

Adam jones, prove to use that the trade was worth it

Why don't you have a seat, Jones

Sit down AJ.

That’s why you’re not here anymore. And Ibanez running around is the reason we wish you were.

Gotta love when the "new comments" popup

Takes up the whole screen

ralphie81 - April 22, 2008 reply

IVE ALWAYS HATED ADAM JONES

Was that the splitter?

Those were 2 lovely pitches to O Hernandez

Man

Those are some EVIL bendy things.

I think the ump wants to go home

seattlebruin - April 22, 2008 reply

Offspeed stuff out the wazoo

KK!!!!

stfd!!

KK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YEAHHHHHHH!!!!

NASTY

KK

OWNZ!!

Sit Down!!!!!!!!

Nojf33 - April 22, 2008 reply

This is awesome

K!

K!

Mista Split!

Meester!! Meester!!

OMG JJ

God I love you

I ♥ JJ

sweet

Tony S - April 22, 2008 reply

KK!!

That one bit!!

KK!!

Holy shit that was NASTY

THATS HOW YOU THROW THE FUCKING SPLITTER

SIT THE FUCK DOWN COCKGOBBLER

He didn't see a single fastball

Eww.

I missed JJ lots.

Hernandez doesn't even get the home version of the game

3 Mr. Splittys in a row

KK!! THIS IS FUCKING BADASS

lol Jay Payton

olololol

Diatribe - April 22, 2008 reply

Strike. This. Motherfucker. Out.

I SAY AGAIN

GIVE THEM HOPE SO THAT HE MIGHT SNATCH THAT SHIT AWAY

Jay Payton

ahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Jay Payton looks like he's going to wet himself.

Wet if he's lucky

At least he'd still have his pride

5 strikes in a row

Man, JJ is on a fucking mission.

J.J. > Jay

THIS IS TOTAL FUCKING GODHEAD

Just surrender.

Hoyl shit Putz is most definitely back and ready to fuck people up

Clap, Clap, Clap.

JJ not messing around.

Get um JJ

It's time for the splitty.

are they playing the old Sasaki song?

What song was that

I missed it, and forget

I mean... Fun? Go?

Disturbing

but not nearly as disturbing as the Ronald goblin

seriously, why?

like, what type of creepy GTE is this?

A bit too rapey

even for LL

let’s stick to Felix sex and child molesting jokes PLZ

I sometimes have difficulty expressing my self in the written word.

Pictures, sometimes, are a superior medium.

What exactly is this an expression of?

Deep seeded resentment toward his mother?

Richard Simmons holds his mother in nothing but the highest esteem

But she and Majic had a falling out a few years back after that deal went bad down in Guatemala

unyielding rapey joy?

You have produced yet another desktop

And I tiled this one.

Your creepiness is unparalleled.

I like your disturbing pictures

They are unsettling, creepy, and awesome!

Well everyone in the world knows its going to be a splitter..

blow him away please.

THUNDERSTRUCK!

Aubrey Huff

Is a girl name.

FUN GO!! FUCK YEAH!!

HE'S BACK!!!

M's WIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GAME

PUTZ WOO!!!!

GAME IS FUCKING OVER

WOOOOOOOOO

GAME!!

HOLY SHIT THAT WAS FUCKING EPIC

GOD I MISSED YOU JJ

Whew it's nice to have ya back JJ!!!

seattlesundevil - April 22, 2008 reply

PUTZ WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

“Order’s been restored in the Pacific Northwest!”

No strikeout?

GAME OVER!!

Bullpen power, restored.

FUCK YES

PUTZ IS BACK AND KDgsdgjlsanasgASDGMDSAGKLMASDKGMAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WIN WIN WIN

Now Nathan get that shit done vs OAK

Nice call by Sims...

Putz wooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!

Ballgame byahhhh

ORDER HAS BEEN RESTORED

Fuck yeah!

When is Bedard back?

Saturday

against the A’s.

M's WIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I wish JJ was just a giant soul patch on the mound.

But still as dominant.

MARINERS WIN!

SIMS GETS SUITABLY APOCALYPTIC!

OK, now please send down Morrow when Bedard gets back

Corcoran can stay, and Morrow needs to BE A STARTER!!

This was a good Felix Day

Not for Felix's quest of a Cy Young.

Need more W’s, unfortunately.

Doesn't look like C.C. or Verlander, or Beckett are gonna get a lot of w's either.

Greinke is.

As wild as that sounds.

Wonder how he'll handle the attention...

Here is a preview:

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

seattlesundevil - April 22, 2008 reply

I am recommending this FanPost

Emoticon, where is the emoticon?

Matsuzaka is winning it this year

Actually

It helps when these are Felix’s bad games, and yet he’s still able to settle down like he did.

If his ERA stays around this, he won't need wins

signed,

Roger Clemens

Good is a fair word to use

Krueger: No more mentions of "baseball gods" until you lose the Brylcreem

Total Contribution by Pitchers: 99.7%

Oh man

I can’t believe how this game turned out, considering how it started. Felix ended up having an awesome day despite two shitty innings, and PUTZ IS HIMSELF AGAIN AND THEN SOME!

This is great news, I have high hopes for sweeping this series.

That would be some great revenge.

seattlesundevil - April 22, 2008 reply

Oakland down to their last out!

The power of King Felix.

Mariners win.

Angels, A’s, and Rangers lose.

Are we watching the Rangers?

Really?

Dave Cameron says they might surprise.

That pitching is still scary bad though.

Dear lord the pitching is horrendous!

Yeah, Barton just K'd.

Oakland loses

M’s 1 back in the West

The Orioles analysts are trying to justify Guthrie staying in to face Vidro

Aww… It’s so cute to watch them try

That was one awful decision

Why didn’t they just go to Walker to face Ibanez?

Uhh? IBB? No?
by JI on Apr 22, 2008 9:19 PM PDT reply reply actions actions

I’m fucking brilliant.

Vidor sucks against eveeryone

so I don’t see how it matters.

The entire team should pull a prank on JJ for this

Like anal rape in the shower or something harmless like that.

Game threads are going to lose their freedom of speech privileges

JEFF IZ A NAZI!

Were the Nazi's known for being anti-analsex?

Actually they were

why do I have an apostrophe in there? damn nazis.

I love that as your punctuation improved your capitalization deteriorated

TOO MANY GUIDELINES

I typed a 10 page paper today and just don't care anymore.

I composed a 128 bar saxophone quartet chart.

Stop your whining.

Does this apply to you to or just the rest of us peons?

None of my rules apply to me except the politics/religion one

but sweet Jesus things lately have just been really over the line.

I guess

Maybe some guidelines are in order

How about

1. Use some common fucking sense.

My common sense is used 99% of the time

The other 1% of the time it’s thrown out the window

1. Don't be an idiot

Those guidelines are too loose

You are asking for trouble with general TOS like that!

If you feel the need to cross the line

make sure it’s A) amusing, and B) done in moderation

otherwise don’t

Use your common sense, like Goose said

if you’re saying something for the sole purpose of getting a reaction, don’t say it. The beauty of GTE was that it just came out.

I go by this guideline.

Haha

Picard sure has been making alot of appearances on LL this season.

Picard: >0. Kirk: 0

No love for Pike?

This is now beyond my comfort zone

Embrace your inner nerd, Jeff.

Embrace it.

Even if I wanted to I can't go back in time and have a more Trekkie childhood

You could if you slingshotted around the sun!

This is true.

Bring a whale back with you.

Say "Nuclear Wessels"

Nuclear Wessels

Ha.

Fuck sling shotting around the Sun

You can do that any most bars

at*

Captain Sikso FTW

Wrong.

Epic wrongness.

How did I miss that?

The order is

Picard > Kirk > Janeway > Sisko

Sisko > Janeway

Eh...perhaps

It’s close.

You couldn't be more wrong if you tried

Sisko >>> Picard >>> Kirk >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Janeway

I think LL has offically jumped the shark.

I better find a new hobby/life

No Jeff.

You’re one of us.

One of us.
One of us.
One of us.

Always unsettling

Resistance is Futile.

If < 1 ohm.

Glad I could help.

Whoops?

I'm thinking Sens blog

That’d be way more cheery!

...

No man

Cardinals blog.

No Joel

never again

Franklin?

Holy shit you’d have so much material ready to go!

Too bad Player A got the boot.

*You now know that I suffer twice as much as the average Mariner fan.

Oklahoma Sonics, man.

How could that fail?

Why are we such masochists?

Comes with the territory.

Some people are born to hurt others

Others are born to hur themselves.

Know your role.

Jeff Sullivan - April 23, 2008 reply

Picard is still the greatest

Sisko is still the worst.

I'm gonna get slammed for this but

Kirk>>Picard>>Sisko>>Archer>>Janeway

The Ronald McDonald chicken >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Archer

I refuse to believe that show happened.

Season 4 salvaged it a bit for me

As far as I'm concerned

Star Trek disappeared after DS9 ended.

Season 4 was excellent.

Enterprise was following the same formula as it’s predessecors by getting really good around season 4.

Then they cancelled it because the real hardcore living in their mothers basement trekkies couldn’t handle a few fucking continutity errors.

Season 4 sucked balls

but less so than the others.

Wrong

Season 4 was what Enterprise was supposed to be initally. The backstory of the forming of the Federation.

Agreed

My hatred of what this show did to the franchise

is similar to my hatred for the Vidro trade.

...really? What did it do to the franchise?

This is what I don’t get. People act like the show killed Star Trek. Last I checked, they’re still making another movie(it remains to be seen if it will suck as much as Insurrection), Star Trek is still insanely popular, and it’s still got arguably the biggest fanbase in tv history.

Really, what did Enterprise do to that franchise. Enlighten me.

Goose - April 23, 2008 reply

It was one of the lowest rated shows on tv, if not the lowest rated

And no it didn’t kill it in a technical sense, it just killed everything that was supposed to be decent and good about it. It was soul-suckingly bad.

JI - April 23, 2008 reply

That's what the whole show was supposed to be

but it wasn’t, it was about staring at some ugly chick in a cat suit and listening to Scott Bakula whine.

There was no plan, no story line, and no stories that hadn’t been done before.

I recommend this site it’s hilarious and is almost 100% right about everything that was wrong with the show.

Star Trek bringing in chicks to boost ratings is nothing new.

And Scott Bakula is awesome.(Quantum Leap is one of my favorite shows of all time) Yeah his character was a little bit of a pansy in the first two seasons, but that changed in a hurry in season 3.

Besides, can’t we agree that the mirror universe episodes in season 4 were awesome, and they should of made a series out of that instead?

Goose - April 23, 2008 reply

Are you kidding?

His character got worse and worse as the show wore on. he was a loud mouth ill informed moron asshole. Pretty much the worst type of person—let alone a character that was supposed to be revered.

Sure the were a handful of good episodes but the main reason the show sucked was bad writing: reused plots, reset button plots, zero character continuity, and complete character assassination (the characters are complete idiots: 100% incompetent). On top of that, it wasn’t a good trainwreck, it told boring stories and had mundane action sequences.

JI - April 23, 2008 reply

I love Evil Hoshi

ningwers - April 23, 2008 reply

And I've never been interested in the orginial

so I could give a shit about continuity errors. It was just a suck ass lame horribly written, planned, and acted show.

Agreed.

Oh, so you're one of those

“OMG ENTERPRISE IS THE SUXORS BECAUSE THE TITLE DIDN’T HAVE THE WORD STAR TREK IN IT FOR THE FIRST TWO SEASONS!” people then?

No, it was just a poorly written

and executed show.

No

The show sucked all kinds off balls and was embarrassing to watch / being caught watching it.

I'd switch Picard and Kirk

but otherwise I have no problem with that

Hey now, Cassidy was a good looking woman

...

And that’s enough of that conversation