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Lookout Landing

This Could Not Be More Humiliating

Mike Mussina has a little league fastball. Mike Mussina has a little league fastball and an assortment of slop that he throws in an effort to screw with the hitters' timing of his little league fastball. Through his first six starts he struck out all of 12 batters in 32.1 innings while putting up a swinging strike rate of six percent. SIX PERCENT. In middle school one of my English teachers taught me her little rule of thumb that you should spell out numbers up to ten and then switch to numeric form for higher ones. If I'm spelling out your swinging strike rate, that's bad. That's almost impossibly bad.

And yet there goes Mussina, whiffing five - all swinging - over six effective innings.

Top 6th: Seattle

- R. Ibanez struck out swinging
- A. Beltre safe at first on third baseman M. Ensberg's throwing error
- J. Clement struck out swinging
- R. Sexson struck out swinging

I can't even blame it on the lineup being too right-handed since three of the strikeouts were by lefties. So instead I'll blame it on the lineup being bad. This lineup is bad. And while I expect it to get better as Clement and Balentien get their sea legs (not a pun, shut up) and Johjima regresses towards the mean in a good way, it'll still be bad, and it'll still be a problem that costs us games. Our pitching is good, but it's not spectacular. We need run support, and right now, do you trust these guys to provide it?

There will be streaks. There'll be streaks where we look back on this post and think it's stupid, and there'll be streaks where we look back on this post and think I wasn't being harsh enough. But what matters is the overall picture, and when you can count the number of players you expect to consistently get on base on the severed right hand of Mordecai Brown, you're in trouble. This lineup just doesn't have enough talent to get away with making so many easy outs.

I suppose on a day like today, I shouldn't be picking on the offense, not when Felix was as bad as he's looked in forever. But where Felix has earned the right to have the occasional stinker, this offense hasn't, and the longer it takes to get its shit together, the further we sink. At 13-18, we're tied with the Nationals and behind San Francisco. This is a big hole. This team is in danger of ending its season before it even begins.

The clock is ticking.

Wake up.

5_3_08_medium

Biggest Contribution: Ichiro, +10.0%
Biggest Suckfest: Felix, -26.6%
Most Important AB: Ichiro single, +10.1%
Most Important Pitch: Jeter double, -10.9%
Total Contribution by Pitcher(s): -25.9%
Total Contribution by Hitters: -30.1%
Total Contribution by Opposition: +6.0%
(What is this chart?)

0 recs  |  177 comments

Comments

I am so depressed right now
Lookout Landing Suicide Pact?
Call it a party and I'm there

awesome

Jeff needs to take more pictures

See I have permanent low expectations for the M's...so this isn't morbidly depressing. Just expect.
According to the Baker

Johnny Mac gave the team a closed door beating (of the verbal kind). I’m not really sure yelling is a constructive way to reach people though. Meh. Go Blue Jays.

I wish it was of the physical kind
Really?

I am sure Mac has them shaking in there lil booties. I don’t see McLaren as a scary guy. Have someone else lay into them, better then Grandpa yelling. He might hurt his shoulder again.

Ruh rah rah

I don’t understand it either. How is Mac supposed to instill fear into a bunch of guys who make a ridiculous amount of money to play a game? Mac can’t dock their pay.

“Closed door beating”, my college really needs to raise its standards for Literary majors.

Baseball players, by and large, actually want to do their job well.

And while I’m not sure that these sorts of ass-chewings ever actually produce results, I don’t really think it’s fair to chalk up the lack of results to the amount of money the players make.

What a joke

We’re not winning shit this season. We should just nuke the whole team for prospects and start over since our farm system is now gutted.

Theoretically

The Mariners shouldn’t have to enter another “rebuilding” cycle. They have the resources to “retool” instead, much like the Red Sox are doing. It just requires competent management. I’d really like to see Ichiro get another shot at the playoffs, and all the important pieces (or most of them) are coming back next year. Plus, if Vidro’s option doesn’t vest, his 8 million and Sexson’s 14 million come off the books.

They've tried this before.

It didn’t work. I agree that a competent front office could, given the amount of money the Mariners have to spend and the core of players they have coming back, could make a “retooling” plan work. The current regime (or whatever clones they’re replaced with, if it comes to that) have shown me absolutely nothing to make me think they’re capable of doing so.

I try so hard to be optimistic about this team and it’s future, but at this point, it’s impossible. And it’s gotten to the point that they’re going to have to go through a very long stretch of making smart decisions for me to ever feel optimistic again.

I think the White Sox are trying to follow this

After their disaster of a season last year, they decided they still have a core that they could compete with rather than completely stripping the team down and rebuilding. We’ll see how they do later on. I think I’d like the Mariners build a core around Ichiro-Beltre-Felix-Putz-Bedard.

We're not at that point yet
This tree you speak of. Does it burn?
I believe that this ship is sinking

and that we are to play for ourselves IIRC

I feel like such a douchebag for thinking this team would skate through the AL West
I completely agree, and I think the front office has to know this lineup needs help BAD.

The thing is, I don’t think it matters in the least, because to make the team demonstrably better, they’re going to have to add current ML talent from somewhere else. And I just don’t trust this front office to do that with any measure of success. If this team had the same record and personnel but a different GM, I wouldn’t be all that concerned. There probably aren’t enough pieces out there to compete with the Angels, but there’s at least enough to make this an above average team, and it wouldn’t impact next year’s chances in the least. There’s no way you can convince me that the M’s couldn’t pick up sort sort of an upgrade at a corner outfield spot without giving up anything of tremendous value. Even though Richie hasn’t been the biggest problem with the offense, there are still upgrades at 1B falling out of my ass right now. (And Richie would be a nice platoon partner with Clement at DH and a decent enough bat off the bench to boot.)

And I know that I’m not saying anything right now that hasn’t been said a billion times before by people who know more about baseball than I ever will. But it’s just SO FUCKING OBVIOUS that I’ve convinced myself that if enough people keep saying it, eventually someone will catch on. Far fetched, I know, but what the fuck else am I supposed to do?

well there is always

the all time HR and modern OPS leader… i heard he’s pretty good.

Missed the game.

Why did Felix take such a big dump today?

Not sure, not worried
Maybe he was daydreaming

about the mythical kingdom of “run support”

No sunshine, no lollipops, no rainbows

make Felix something something…

Fiber overload
BONDS
Right.

King Barry rules the Kingdom of Run Support

I wonder if Reggie Stocker is available...

(Yes, that was an MLB: The Show joke. Yes, I am ashamed of myself.)

If not Stocker

then perhaps that Jon Dowd guy…

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jon_Dowd

Did everyone see the encomium of Mussina at USSM?
Welcome to Mariner Offense

Played 6 games this week:

Total runs scored before the 9th inning: 9
Total runs scored before the 9th inning outside of Wlad: 6

Total number of multi-run innings: 2
Total number of multi-run innings before the 9th: 1
Total number of multi-run innings before the 9th outside of Wlad: 0

Bavasi: “This pitching rotation is designed to stop losing skids”
M’s Offense: “We’ll just see about that….”
M’s Defense: “Muhahaha….”

so what needs to happen to fix this offense?

They’ve power flushed Wilkerson and Norton in favor of Wlad.
They’ve moved Vidro to the bench in favor of Clement.

What else needs to be done to make this an AL average offense?

The schedule

The next 13 games after Sunday looks like this:

4x Texas
3x White Sox
3x Texas
3x San Diego

If the offense is going to sort itself out that would be the time to do it. If they don’t by the time they finish San Diego this season will be over because:

3x Detroit
3x New York (Yankees)
3x Boston
3x Detroit
3x Angels
3x Boston

That’s a mighty long stretch of facing expected contenders.

So yeah...

How bout ‘dem Seahawks?

Yes, but you guys nailed it!

Going in, the prevailing opinion was:

1) The Bedard trade didn’t make since because the Mariner’s really weren’t that close.

2) That’s because: nothing was done in the off-season to correct the defensive suck in LF, RF and 1B, and

3) nothing was done in the off-season to correct the offensive suck at 1B, RF and DH.

4) The bullpen would be solid, though the loss in consecutive years of Soriano and Sherrill made it much thinner and therefore more harder to withstand injuries or suckage to/by key guys.

5) The Pythag could catch up to us in particularly humiliating ways.

And so, you guys were right! At least for the first month, that’s pretty much what happened. That’s why the ’’re-build” course was such a popular choice (develop Clement to catch and replace Joh at mid-season or next year, develop Morrow as a starter, play Jones everyday in RF, keep Butler and Tillman moving through the system, keep working the draft, etc.) before the Bedard trade, the Silva-Wilkerson-Cairo signings and the Joh extension.

The upshot: It’s hard to watch the bad stuff come true, knowing you can’t go back to “re-build” alternative easily.

But: The M’s have lots of resources, still, and the season will also deliver some pleasant surprises. We just haven’t had many yet.

Yes it could.
Update: Sunday, May 4th, 12:47PM

I told you.

er, "didn't make sense"

apologies to offended sensibilities.

The new line-up has just begun.

Clement and Wlad are doing fine, we have forgotten how new they are to the Majors…give them a few weeks to settle in. They will be far better than Wilkerson and Norton. I don’t know how the hell Cairo is still on our team, that is beyond me… Also, after Wilk/Nort getting sent down, I’m sure it’s put pressure on other struggling players that don’t want to be benched… JJ should get his groove back hopefully…. We can still have a great season.

I'm glad you seem to think...

that these young kids will settle in fine… Personally I believe that this team needs to address the black hole that is 1B… I’m not convinced that JJ is fully healed… You’re far too optimistic…

I don't think

Sexson is exactly a black hole… he’s right about the middle of the pack for 1st basemen in the AL…...
The biggest problem for this offense is Ichiro not being Ichiro yet….. he’s 10th in AL for CF in OPS, 7th in BA, 10th in OBP….

He’s the important factor for this offense, getting on and creating runs… he’s not doing much of that so far this year and that’s a big problem.

Sexson is having success against LHP...

But he can’t seem to handle life against RHPs…I propose an Ibanez/Sexson platoon…Perhaps call up Reed to play LF…

Reed will help some but not enough to make a difference.
What Reed can't do with the bat...

he makes up for with his defense…

Exactly, its a wash. He doesn't help us enough to make a difference.
Why don't you watch Raul play left a little more

and get back to me on that.

I've seen Raul and he is terrible.

But I believe Raul makes it up with his bat which evens things out. Adding Reed would improve the defense a lot but his bat doesn’t even come close to Raul’s or Richie’s. I just don’t see how Reed would make a difference.

Raul can't hit lefthanders

Sexson can’t hit righthanders. You platoon them at 1B you mitigate the suck factor both of them bring to the plate. Reed may hit as poorly as both of their bad platoon splits (which I doubt), but in the end might net a win or two with his defense alone.

Thats a great idea. If only the M's thought that way.
BTW, Raul v LHP + Richie v RHP

combined .691 OPS.

What about Raul vs. RHP + Richie vs. LHP?

I think we should really start mentioning this. If Geoff Baker gets wind, he usually passes along the idea to the team if he likes the idea.

.902 OPS combined
Pretty.
A 1B platoon makes too much sense

But I doubt the M’s would have the balls to platoon a 14 million dollar man and the FOF.

Yikes.

I didn’t realize it was that bad.

Even with the horrid glove play

this team is putting out there… giving up runs isn’t out of hand…. scoring runs is the problem. Putting Reed in the lineup is not going to help this team score runs which is the most significant issue this team has right now.

preventing a run is just as valuable as saving a run

improvement is improvement.

cool

so they lose 3-1 instead of 4-1… that’ll make a lot of difference in the W-L column.

So what would you do to improve the team?

Seems you’re not overly keen on improving the defense and keeping Richie/Raul’s suck platoon splits out of the lineup.

I'm not interested in Reed

Unless some bigger impact can’t be brought in to help this offense.

Otherwise its shuffling the cards with the same exact hand.

You can put Reed in LF and Raul at first. You gain defense in the outfield and don’t gain any offensive increase, and likely make the defense at first even worse….. side step.

There’s nothing in the minors left that’s going to make this team better, so its time to look outside the organization to see what can be acquired…. or just play the hand you have and hope they get better.

Raul does far less damage at first

than he does in left field. It’s an overall net gain to platoon Raul with Richie and put Reed in LF. Dramatic net gain? No. Improvement, Absolutely.

far less damage based on what evidence?

Raul hasn’t played first in years…. he’ll have a ton more responsibility in the infield then he does to the outfield.

So far Richie has had 263 total chances… Raul has had 61. There’s a much bigger chance that Raul costs this team alot more outs moving to first

a chance in LF is not equal to a chance at 1B
Really?

based on what?

common sense

firstbase may handle the most chances, but it also handles the most easy chances. Left field, particularly in Safeco Field, involves more skills (running, throwing) than first does.

Also, a good reference tool

Richie would have more total chainces though

if he ever was able to get to a groundball.

We should flip Sexson and Beltre on the infield

that way our best fielder could handle the most chances.

This post is highly amusing

but still a very valid way to illustrate that defense deals with far more than total chances.

If the M's are completely out of it in September,

I would completely endorse something like this. Put Richie at short, Johjima in center, Yuni catching, and Ichiro pitching ever five days. I’d buy a ticket to watch that.

The sad thing?

I probably would too.

I would pay a LOT of money to watch that
so on that defensive spectrum

first base is #2 and LF is #3 ….. Raul having not played there in years, not being exactly mobile, its highly predictable he plays far worse then Sexson…. so you stregthen one position with Reed, weaken another with Raul…. and still have a sub .700 ops hitter in the lineup with Reed.

again… that still equates to a side step in my book not an improvement that’s going to make a lick of difference to the W-L column of this team.

That's the general defensive spectrum

In a park like Safeco or Yankee Stadium, left field is much more important than it is in a typical ball park. Think of left field in Safeco as almost a second center field.

I’ve said this before, but it bears repeating here; the outfield at Safeco is backwards in terms of defensive setup. While center field is still the most important position defensively, left field is not that far behind, with right field being the least important. The alignment of the walls is the big factor here. Simply put, the best chance for a double or a triple in Safeco is to hit one into the left center field alley. In most stadiums, right center or the right field line is the place for gap hits to turn into extra base knocks. However, because of Safeco’s short porch down the right field line and relativel shallow RF-CF gap, combined with the wall aiming caroms toward the center fielder, that isn’t the case in Seattle.

So, while it’s true that most teams can simply hide their worst defensive player in left field, the Mariners are not in that position. Left field is an important area for defensive value. Safeco is traditionally a flyball park, making outfield defense more important than in a neutral park, and it’s also a park that is at the extreme of run values on balls hit into the LF-CF gap. Balls hit there that are turned into outs are more beneficial than average, while balls hit there that get down for hits are more harmful than average.

In fact, if I was going to design a defensive spectrum for Safeco specifically, it would go SS-CF-LF-2B-3B-RF-1B. I’d argue that left field is the third most important defensive position (excluding catcher, a whole other animal) for the Mariners, and the fact that they’ve assembled a staff of flyball pitchers only emphasizes that.

linky

Also, keep in mind, the gap between each position of the spectrum is not equal.

Wow, thanks for this link.

Going straight to the bookmarks.

whatever the gap is it doesn't make this team

any better if at all, because this teams biggest problem is scoring runs. You can put all the gold glove fielders out there you want, if they can’t hit they don’t make this team better and Reed can’t not hit any better then what Raul and Sexson do in their negative splits.

Yes scoring runs is a problem

but given that there are no realistic options in house or via trade that this club is going to look into, you’d best start give the defense another look. Regardless of whether Reed’s bat is an asset or not, his defense coupled with platooning Richie and Raul DOES make this team better.

this is just wrong

there’s no other way to put it.

Some defensive systems last year had Raul giving away more wins with his glove than he provided with his bat—which is astonishing considering that he is a good hitter.

Think of it this way (and lord knows that the LL authors could use actual numbers instead of estimates and explain this better)

hypothetically (using not real values, but made up estimates)

that Raul’s bat is worth enough runs to equal 3 wins, but his fielding is so atrocious that it’s cost the team 4 wins, you have a player’s who contribution is worth -1.

Let’s also say that Reed’s punchless bat is worth -3 wins, but his glove adds 4, you have a +2 player. Raul’s contributions: -1, Reed’s +1.

This is the fundamental reasoning behind the Reed for LF bandwagon.

"if they can’t hit they don’t make this team better"

Bullshit

Reading this again,

it’s amusing to think that at some point we expected Yuni to learn to steal bases

Its gonna depend on your pitching staff a ton

With a GB% out there 2B and 3B definitely are more important than LF. I still think it might be a little hyperbole to say LF is that important.

One of the problems with using a defensive spectrum

is that a LF (Ibanez) doesn’t necessarily become a better defender when you move him to 1B. Thats not what this tells you. Do you think Betancourt would make a good CF for example? We just don’t know how good of a 1B Ibanez would be.

Well it would be hard for him to suck *worse* at first

...but yeah, it’s based on the general talent pool. Obviously, this doesn’t hold true for every player.

You're assuming that these differences are binary.

Where 1 = good defense and 0 = bad defense.

By your logic, all the Mariners would be doing in this situation is changing LF from 0 to 1 and changing 1B from 1 to 0.

Reality says that the improvement Reed provides to the overall defense far outweighs the disadvantages of moving Raul to a 1B platoon.

I give up

go with Reed… I expect we’ll then be a much better team and see a marked improvement in this team.

It doesn't have to be marked to be an improvement.

I don’t think anyone’s arguing that this will make the team awesome. Just better.

many little granules of better can add up to be one pile awesome
Total chances include the ball being thrown to your chest for an out,

so obviously Richie’s going to have way more than any other position. Raul would probably be worse than Richie, but he’d do less damage than he’s doing in left field. It’s lower on the defensive spectrum.

Exactly.

The whole notion of a 1B Richie/Raul platoon is to mitigate the damage both players can cause. Defensively, Raul does far less damage at 1B than he does in LF.

You'd prefer losing 4-2, obviously.
Dump Cairo; Call Up Reed

There’s your bench:
1. Burke - C
2. Johjima/Clement – C
3. Bloomquist - UT
4. Vidro—Bench Space

Yeah, it sucks, but I could live with it as long as Ibanez is not in left field.

I don't think that bench sucks.
ICHIRO HURTS THIS TEAM BY CHANNELING THE SUCK OF HIS TEAMMATES
It seems like half of Baker's blog

is calling for Ichiro to be crucified right now. How they overlooked the rest of the lineup and jumped straight to Ichiro is beyond me.

Ichiro has been the target of idiots/casual fans since he set foot in the U.S.

The guy is classy, goes about his job like a true professional and very good at what he does. I just don’t get it.

I've never understood why the casual fan hates Ichiro so much either.

Just go to a game and watch him in between pitches playing defense and warming up in the batters box. He’s always preparing to make a play. Rarely do you see any kind of mental lapse with him (Today’s error is one of the few times you’ll ever see him pull his eyes off a ball in play). He simply understands the game and its nuances more than any other player in the sport.

And really, if they’re complaining about his slow April start this season, didn’t he get off to a similar one when he broke the ML single-season hits record?

And last season when he hit .351

As far as I remember, the only season in which Ichiro has had a good April was his first in the US.

Last year I saw him in April in Anaheim and I swear he looked disinterested and behind Ervin Santana’s slop fastballs. That turned out OK btw.

Whatever to the casual fans. He’ll turn it around, and when he posts another .335/.380/.430 season with 50 steals and good to great CF, we’ll be once again talking about what a genius deal his contract is

Fuck Dave Samson.

Eh most of those casual fans will be gone come June anyways.

Well, if the team continues to play the way they do.
I hate the Mariners
That wasn't very nice.

I think you just made poor Howie, Chuck, and Billy cry.

They smile as long as we buy Mariners tickets and merchandise.
It's OK because I'm not helping them there either

my ticket money is going straight to the Angels and Padres!

Wouldn't it somehow end up with the Mariners anyway

With the revenues sharing? There is no escape!

We suck.

This is the first time in a long time I have felt bad for our starting pitching.

Um.

Be careful what you wish for.

I mean, yeah Mike Mussina totally sucks and all, but he always, ALWAYS finds a way to kill the Mariners.

What could be MORE humilating?

Getting shut the fuck out by Horacio Fucking Ramirez.

At least no one is dumb enough to put HoRam on a Major League ballclub.
Texas should

a. because it fits right in with their team concept
b. because it’s hard to suck more

dru nk hjigh hahah yeayyyyyyyyy

wooooooooooooooooo fuck the ms!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

go felic nad bvetlere domainate the ms will make the plaoyffs guartenteed.

fucking shit

go felix and beltre and well make the playoffs guraenteedd

wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

How did your typing improve so much in just 60 seconds?
because io fpocused on what i wasd writing

wellllllll thats all folks…we just smoked and ran from the cops so wooo hahahahtats crazy

im gon na lauyght at this tomorrow hahahah thius team needsa to not suck cock they need to dominate and win the playoffs.

FLyers woooooooooooooooooo

Having a hangover during a shitty Mariners game is the best part
He still types better than I do.
That's cuz im a champ

i dont playu around i tun this.

hahahah im wearin my arod mariners jersey

Are you singing?
Translation

We got drunk at our lan party while playing GTA4.

False

we had a case race and then we smoked so im pretty fucked up now. kess so than before but pretty bad.

fuck the yankees

Haha

Agreed.

I'm drunk and it's difficult to see what exactly you were going for...expect

Fuck the Yankees…and I agree.

Today's depressing fact:

Micah Owings was drafted in 2005 in the third round by the Diamondbacks with the pick they received from the Mariners for their signing of Richie Sexson.

Why must you make me cry?

That’s not as bad as Conor Jackson(.350/.431/.610) being drafted in the first round with the pick they received from us because we signed Greg Colburn(or was it Quinton McCracken?).

We signed him, and then gave him away for "Q"

linky

Micah Owings couldn't hit much as an AL SP

We’d have no idea he was anything other than a decent SP, if we had hypothetically drafted him.

Nah.

They’d stick him in the bullpen. He’d never find his way into the rotation.

We'd have flipped him to Atlanta for Peter Moylan or somebody
No, we'd flip him to Atlanta for Brent Lillibr . . .

Nah

Couple Solutions

-Get them all glasses
-Make them play video games to improve hand-eye coordination.

Glad I missed this one.

I think we all need some video games

to take our minds off this godforsaken team. Liberty City awaits . . .

Im not a fan of the wanted level system.

Other than that, the game is pretty freaking good.

I'm pretty impressed.

But yeah, outrunning that “wanted circle” is a bitch.

If its more than 3 stars, I mmight as well give up

And im a good driver.

But I do love driving into people. Id had a hooker go through the windshield. I pushed a guy on the train tracks and kept pushing him until he came after me…then I let him chase me until the train was coming, i jumped and watched him get drilled. I also got hit later by it, hit a pole, and fell off a bridge.

Ran out jaywalking and didnt see a taxi coming as it flew into my side at a high speed and killed me.

Also jumped off the train tracks trying to land on cars. Never made it, but i had one instance where the dude’s leg hits the side causing him to fly forward, head first into the car door. Door was dented badly. And my guy died. Good times. Without playing online…

Awesome lol

Imagine describing this game to someone living 30 years ago

Teams I hate:

1. Red Sox
2. Mariners
3. Anaheim
4. Yankees

You misspelled

Cubs.

It's only a four team list.
and Carlos Zambrano is a prick wagon
I think I'll need an illustration

of what exactly a “prick wagon” looks like.

What about...

The athletics. trying to match us with another Suzuki batting leadoff.

Ummm, Ichiro leads off for us not some Suzuki guy.

Who is this Suzuki that you speak of?

Kurt Suzuki

He catches for them. He’s Hawaiian, not Japanese though.

Most persons of Hawaiian ancestry (like myself)

are at least part Japanese as well. I’d be surprised if he wasn’t mixed between Hawaiian/Japanese/Chinese given where he’s from and his surname.

All that being said, Ichiro Suzuki >>>>>>>>> Kurt Suzuki. But Kurt Suzuki isn’t too terrible

yeah

I think when i was watching the A’s Red Sox series in Japan they said his parents or grandparents were from Japan

Y'all sound like we did

last week over at the Rangers blog, LoneStarBall. Cheer up. The Rangers are coming to town. Nothing cures an offense better than Rangers pitching.

Nothing cures an ailing pitching staff better than Mariners hitting.
I think the two teams could work something out
I don't know.

With Turbo’s mass and both team’s collective suck, we might be looking at a scenario in which a black hole forms and destroys the Earth.

Scary shit, yo.

Yea, it could be something of a paradox

Since the pitching and the hitting sucks so bad, it might not even be possible to get an out, or a hit.

Frightening.
Boring

Mariner’s are boring. They’ve been boring for some time. During this boringness, they have wasted the sublime talents of Ichiro and are wasting Felix Hernandez as well. The face of this boring team is Raul Ibanez. He’s a boring player in the classic, boring Mariner way. Bloomquist is boring. The entire bench is boring. Sexson is not boring, he’s pathetic. Lopez is Boring. Betancourt is on the fence. He wasn’t boring a few years ago but now, has the disease. Washburn. Boring. Beltre is not boring and is being wasted as well. Whoever is in Right Field is boring. Johjima is not boring, but something is wrong. I think he is getting the sickness as well. The coaching staff is boring, the management is boring and the ownership is boring.

Want to join Jeff and become Rays fans?

I hear they’re not boring.

So they're like this?

Oh now I see what that is!

For some reason that looked like a toilet to me.

The name of the guy in right field is Wlad Balentien.

And I wouldn’t say he’s boring. And Burke isn’t boring either.

Balantien

Until he hits .275 with power and regularity, he’s boring. Burke is not boring, per se, but insignificant. If they used him more, he might be less boring.

How impatient are you?

Balentien has 24 career AB’s.

Speaking of humilating

ESPN’s segment on the game featured Raul’s hilarious “throw”.

“If throwing the ball into the ground was a skill… Raul Ibañez would be an All Star.”

Can someone turn that into an animated gif and sidebar it?
I am seeing what I can do about the animated gif, but for now...

Here's another from a different angle:

I especially like the last shot of him starting to run after the ball.

I think Raul Ibanez is able to defy the laws of physics
that was hilarious

What the hell??????????

Rec’d

Talk about a Rally Dino
The best part is that he actually looks kinda scared.
the Mariners

we’re the cure for every other team’s slump

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