Seattle: 13-19
Rangers:13-19
Game 1: Jarrod Washburn* vs Kevin Millwood
Game 2: Miguel Batista vs Sidney Ponson
Game 3: Erik Bedard* vs Vicente Padilla
Game 4: Felix Hernandez vs A.J. Murray *
I'd like to be able to point out how we have a good matchup in each of these four games, with the first being the worst in terms for us, but Washburn at home isn't nearly as bad as Washburn in Texas. I'd like to be able to do that and, coming off a series win against the downtrodden Yankees, point to a good chance to go 3-1 (or better) in this series to re-establish a .500 record and gain a ton of momentum heading into a soft part of the schedule.
Instead, I now fully look forward to experiencing a new worst moment in Mariner fandom when Sidney Ponson comes in and shuts us down for 7 innings on Tuesday.
Likely Starters:
C Gerald Laird/Jarrod Saltalamacchia^
1 Chris Shelton
2 Ian Kinsler/German Duran
3 Ramon Vazquez
S Michael Young
L Brandon Boggs^
C Josh Hamilton*
R David Murphy*
D Milton Bradley^
Filling out this lineup based on the Rangers last few games, there were a couple people originally filled in as "? Lastname" because I had no idea who they were. And since I'm not Joe Morgan in terms of keeping tabs on baseball, that's a pretty bad sign. Boggs is a replacement for Marlon Byrd, though you might end up seeing Milton Bradley take the field and Laird and Saltalamacchia both in the lineup at DH and C respectively (what a concept).
Milton Bradley: .333/.427/.516
Ben Broussard: Benched
Josh Hamilton: Destroyer of Our Dreams
I don't have much to say here. The Mariners did everything possible to make me look like a fool for trying to look on the bright side of this offense. Regardless, everything looks ugly right now and the urge to come up with some sort of psychological cliche like take it one game at a time, focus on the small things, etc is going to be hard to overcome and it's all pretty much bunk for us to speculate on since we don't have close access to these players. We cannot know if they're loafing, or pressing, or sick, or whatever. We can speculate about what sorts of moves the management should make in order to put the best team possible out on the field, but that's about the end of our analytical projecting rope.
The talent is there. Someone just needs to figure out a way for it display itself.
K-C≡N
You figure it out.
0 recs | 302 comments
I call a split
Does that make me an optimist or a realist?
Frosty Raptor - May 5, 2008
Stay away from Potassium Cyanide
I much prefer beer. I picked up some Cherry Wheat yesterday and was wondering what you guys’s thoughts are about it
Susheel Ramasahayam - May 5, 2008
If you're talking about Sam Adams Cherry Wheat, go with the Cyanide instead.
Pick up a Stone IPA or Anderson Brewing Co. Oatmeal Stout for a better flavor experience.
I tried Lagunitas Maximum IPA and their Imperial Stout this weekend, and although they are good beers, I won’t add them to my regular rotation.
Jed MC - May 5, 2008
I had some Anderson Valley Summer Solstice this weekend
and now I have a new favorite beer. That’s some mighty impressive beer.
pdb - May 5, 2008
Anderson Valley is a very, very good brewery
we’re spoiled out here.
JeffS - May 5, 2008
I've had a couple of their others
and liked them pretty well, but I’d never had the Summer Solstice. Damn, that’s good stuff.
pdb - May 5, 2008
Yes.
Their winter solstice and summer solstice beers are the best things they make.
And that’s saying something.
marc w - May 5, 2008
100% disagree on the subject line
Matthew - May 5, 2008
What, not ricin?
eponymous_coward - May 5, 2008
Cyanide is good?
Were you in LTTE training camps recently?
Susheel Ramasahayam - May 5, 2008
If you click the up button
you can see which comment I replied to.
Matthew - May 5, 2008
Cherry Wheat not too bad?
Susheel Ramasahayam - May 5, 2008
Cyanide is good = sarcasm
Jed MC - May 5, 2008
My girlfriend liked it. It was too much Cherry for me.
So I picked up a six pack of Belgian White. It tastes quite good.
Susheel Ramasahayam - May 5, 2008
Something tells me that those of that are going to go to LL Night
aren’t going to be paying much attention to this game.
Goose - May 5, 2008
You're going to perform a striptease?
JoeyJoJoJuniorShabadoo - May 5, 2008
Good job. You just ruined the surprise for everybody.
Goose - May 5, 2008
Interestingly enough, a Google search for K-C=N turns up this first
KC n JoJo “All My Life”
Frosty Raptor - May 5, 2008
I'm not drinking that
pdb - May 5, 2008
Frosty Raptor - May 5, 2008
How many games back is enough to gow into "Let's blow this team up" mode?
thewyrm - May 5, 2008
Dunno, how many games back are we right now?
6.5? 6.5 sounds like a good number for blowing this team up
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
i don't know
but i DO know that no amount of mathematical tinkering can quite
define just how fucking awful they looked this weekend…
seriously, is anybody gonna sit here and say THAT team has any
business in the playoffs?
short of about 5 guys simultaneously pulling their heads out of their
collective asses… what’s the point?
lyleleander - May 5, 2008
What's the point in what?
Shift key is nice, too
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
if there was ever anything that made me want
lyleleander - May 5, 2008
to drink, it's reading incomplete sentences from people.
pdb - May 5, 2008
pudding, it's watching people eating pudding and talking about how delicious it is.
Mmmm. Pudding.
Graham MacAree - May 5, 2008
so you're into those
“gay cowboys eating pudding” type of movies, huh?
Eyebrows - May 5, 2008
There are movies about pudding?!
Graham MacAree - May 5, 2008
Yes, but he's talking about American pudding,
not the general English term pudding.
Llewdor - May 5, 2008
Beg your pudding?
OlSalty - May 5, 2008
trying again:
if there was ever anything that made want to bother with the shift key less, it was watching that coat-hanger abortion the mariners put up this weekend.
so why bother with playoff speculation at this point?
unless, of course, we’re intentionally trying to drive ourselves insane.
lyleleander - May 5, 2008
No one here is speculating about the playoffs
“blow up the team” implies that we will dump all of the veterans and see what the younger players can do. That or make a panic trade. WOOOOOOOO PANIC TRADES!!!
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
I'm speculating about the playoffs
my speculation is that they will, once again, be Seattle-free. Does that mean that it’s time to set the tree on fire? hmmmm.
pdb - May 5, 2008
Stop disproving my points.
It’s causing me to look stupid and impotent.
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
But at least you know which buttons to push
so that’s something. And something’s not nothing.
pdb - May 5, 2008
So conclusions from this subthread
1. pdb knows what buttons to push
2. so does seattlebruin
3. Knowing what buttons to push is something
4. Nothing is not something. However, “nothing” is the worded version of the Mariners’ playoff chances. And offense, for that matter.
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
I feel like rec'ing this post
and I have no idea why.
pdb - May 5, 2008
You and your rec button
Why don’t you two just get a room already? We know how badly you want to… use it ;)
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
you're just jealous
because I know which buttons to use.
pdb - May 5, 2008
And I don't?
Watch this…
REC’D!
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
I just got served.
unfortunately, I did not get served a delicious beer because I’m still at work.
pdb - May 5, 2008
I'd have some beer now but I've had a rough experience with Captain Alcohol recently
I’ll save it for tomorrow.
Graham MacAree - May 5, 2008
Why is Alcohol a captain? Why not a sergeant or a major?
Or even a general?
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
Did Captain Alcohol pull rank on you?
that’s no good.
pdb - May 5, 2008
Turns out Graham can only pull rank on LL
in the real world…
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
Speaking of pulling rank
and replying to myself we should have LL ranks. That will make us more nerdy, and thus push us closer to our mother’s basements and more like other bloggers
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
you're just trying to give Buzz Bissinger more ammo, aintcha?
pdb - May 5, 2008
I think Buzz Bissigner sounds like a really crappy Lieutenant from a bad Korean War movie
If that’s the case, he hardly needs more ammo
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
I yell at my left back more than I bitch out anyone here.
Graham MacAree - May 5, 2008
hey, at least you didn't find out you're allergic to beer
as i have in the last week.
lyleleander - May 5, 2008
Oh, dude. My condolences.
all alcohol, or just beer?
pdb - May 5, 2008
beer, mostly
because of the yeast. but apparently all alcohol has it
in some measure. it’s not horrible… i just wake up with a
runny nose… kind of feel like i’m getting a cold… and then
it goes away around noon.
lyleleander - May 5, 2008
That happened to me with milk
I’d cry if someone took my booze away from me too
Graham MacAree - May 5, 2008
What would you rather give up, alcohol or tea?
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
Alcohol
Graham MacAree - May 5, 2008
Tea or tRA?
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
Tea
I suffer from withdrawal when my intake drops below 4 or 5 cups a day.
Graham MacAree - May 5, 2008
That is, I'd rather lose tRA than tea
Graham MacAree - May 5, 2008
I'm the same, actually
marc w - May 5, 2008
Gin will be your friend
that, and good vodka.
pdb - May 5, 2008
yeah
Exactly. Gin and Tonic has a little bit of god in it.
lyleleander - May 5, 2008
Amen
However, do not, as I did on Saturday, replace ‘tonic’ with ‘pringles’ and call it dinner.
Graham MacAree - May 5, 2008
I see you've stolen a page from my cookbook
Both my wife and I have this problem where we start drinking and forget to eat. Then, several hours in, we end up scraping around the kitchen for whatever we can find, which usually ends up being a handful of Wheat Thins or Doritos; this is a recipe for disaster.
I always thought that I’d eat better when I got married, but my wife eats like a bachelor too.
pdb - May 5, 2008
You know what vodka is surprisingly not that bad?
The Kirkland Signature one. I swear.
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
Note that "surprisingly not that bad" != good
but I may have to give that a try.
pdb - May 5, 2008
Yeah, we only found this out when we permitted the cheap roommate who doesn't drink anything worthwhile
to buy the birthday party supplies. Usually it’s lots of crap, a two 12 packs of good-ish party beer (almost always Blue Moon) and one handle of Grey Goose or Belvedere.
My roommate came home with Coors Light and Kirkland Signature Vodka. I was not pleased.
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
Most vodka is interchangeable with other vodkas
when put into mixed drinks. Even freezer-chilled ones can surprise you- I’m convinced that the Poles keep their good stuff at home and put the second-class stuff into fancy bottles to sell to stupid Americans.
Case in point: we had a vodka party where we all brought freezer vodka to drink straight shots, and the one that won out over the Belvedere, Vox, Ciroc and Grey Goose was the Wyborowa I got from a friend of mine who went to a wedding in Poznan… and he paid something like 600 zlotys for it ($5).
eponymous_coward - May 5, 2008
when was this?
because 600 zloty is like $250
Matthew - May 5, 2008
All he said was it was about $5 for a fifth once the exchange rate was taken into account
Maybe I got the zlotys wrong.
eponymous_coward - May 5, 2008
the USD figure is probably right
that jives with what I remember about alcohol prices in Poland.
the zloty is way off. Like 10-20 zloty.
Matthew - May 5, 2008
And I'm rather fond of Wyborowa, obviously.
Pity it’s damn near impossible to find in this state.
eponymous_coward - May 5, 2008
Really?
I used to see it a lot; it was never my favorite, so maybe I just haven’t been looking.
Currently, I sort of have a crush on Imperia Vodka, something from Russia. Man, that’s good stuff.
And while I agree that the distinctiveness of top shelf vodkas is often minimized in mixed drinks, I don’t think it just disappears. And if you’re having a martini (1/2 Imperia, 1/2 Hendricks/old Raj), having something good is pretty important.
marc w - May 5, 2008
OK, conceded on the martini point.
I’m thinking more along the lines of people putting Grey Goose in their screwdrivers.
My favorite Russian vodka right now is this one:
http://www.stawskidistributing.com/Russia.html
eponymous_coward - May 5, 2008
Let's not forget whisky, bourbon, rum and tequila here.
eponymous_coward - May 5, 2008
20.0 Games back.
ThundaPC - May 5, 2008
BURN THE TREE!!1!!!!
I’m not sure I WANT to blow the team up, given that our returns on vet-for-prospect trades have generally sucked, compared to our draft choices. Maybe we should just let guys walk in the offseason.
eponymous_coward - May 5, 2008
Walk off cliffs?
Bye Richie!
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
Pity that Johjima isn't one of them.
I don’t see why they couldn’t have waited until the offseason to come to a decision to bring him back, but it’s the Seattle Mariners: extending contracts to fading veterans since 2002.
eponymous_coward - May 5, 2008
yeah
The more i think about the Johjima resigning, the more i’m bummed out. Why couldn’t they have told him (or his agent, or themselves) that they wanted to re-sign him, but that he had to put up some solid numbers before they committed?
We all know Johjima is more than likely to regain some semblance of normality, but it’s still so goddamned par for the course for this team.
lyleleander - May 5, 2008
The problem with the signing isn't the timing,
since Kenji’s BABIP is ridiculously low and it’s ludicrous to think that he won’t somewhat regress to the mean. The problem is that catchers have this unfortunate tendency to break down really fast because of how much they get beat up, and locking up a catcher for his age 32-35 seasons when he is only a marginal asset with the bat is shortsighted at best. Especially when Jeff Clement is coming and his value lies in him being able to play catcher.
I like Kenji a lot, I really do. Just not at $24M for season 32-35
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
Mmmm Type A free agents
Graham MacAree - May 5, 2008
Exactly.
As opposed to Bill Bavasi using his awesome skills at finding dead-armed AAA pitchers.
eponymous_coward - May 5, 2008
yeah, good point. funny how you thought about that...
i had another sentence in that post about ‘especially when he’s a catcher on the bad side of 30 and is blocking our no.1 prospect’
but cut it out for length.
we were all thinking that when it happened though. but johjima is such a nice guy, and means well, that he kind of absolves himself from our wrath.
another thing is, what effect did it have on the other players on the team when they saw a guy in the middle of a slump get handed a huge wad of cash. you can’t tell me that wasn’t an ego blow to at least a few guys.
lyleleander - May 5, 2008
johjima is such a nice guy, and means well, that he kind of absolves himself from our wrath.
Wrong
Graham MacAree - May 5, 2008
Okay, he's not Vidro
how about that?
lyleleander - May 5, 2008
I don't care
That extension was criminally dumb.
Graham MacAree - May 5, 2008
Agreed
I honestly don’t understand the hesitation a lot of us had when it happened to just call total bullshit. Or maybe i missed something.
lyleleander - May 5, 2008
Some people did, some didn't
My feeling was that we now have the Japanese version of Dan Wilson.
OK, Johjima’s a better hitter than Wilson… though thanks to decline phase + typical C wear and tear, he’ll be in the 90ish OPS range. By the end of the contract, he should probably be a backup.
eponymous_coward - May 5, 2008
the japanese version of dan
wilson, with a better bat, and less communication skills
with his pitchers.
lyleleander - May 5, 2008
How do you know this
I’ve never met Johjima myself so I have no idea whether he’s a nice guy or a complete asshole.
Whenever you want to championsome athlete who you know next to nothing about is a “nice guy”, remember two words: Kirby Puckett.
JI - May 5, 2008
i'm not saying i know
But i’m saying that he comes across as affable, and down to earth.
Yeah, he could beat his wife everynight and scream ‘FAGGOT’ out the window when he drives by guys with long hair…
But, i guess i’m just assuming he’s a good person, and so are other people who maybe didn’t immediately scream bloody murder when he was re-signed.
lyleleander - May 5, 2008
Joh is my favorite Mariner
The first M I ever bought an authentic jersey of in fact, and even I think that contract was probably a bad idea.
thewyrm - May 5, 2008
There wasn't much hesitation here that I recall
Of course, I was seeing red at the time so I most of my attention was focused on calling pro-extension people idiots.
Graham MacAree - May 5, 2008
I think we had three different threads with 600 total comments
all of which hated it.
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
I'm a nice guy, and I usually mean well
can I have several million dollars now please?
pdb - May 5, 2008
Are you Japanese? Do you play C for the Mariners?
eponymous_coward - May 5, 2008
Well, no, but apparently niceness and wellmeaningness count
so I figured it would be worth a shot.
pdb - May 5, 2008
Several?
I’m at least Japanese. Can I have the rest of the $24M?
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
I am 1/4th Japanese, 6 M please?
hcoguy - May 5, 2008
Well, pdb gets his share first for being nice and well meaning
you can have 1/4 of what’s left though
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
I just now noticed I typed "gow"
I’m retarded
thewyrm - May 5, 2008
Or you could spin it as inventing your own language and syntax
pdb - May 5, 2008
Sadly, I don't think anyone even noticed. I didn't
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
You know how they say that how to be a playoff team
is to go .500 on the road and make it up at home? Well we’re like the opposite. .500 at home and lose the rest on the road :(
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
Days Unitl We Are Completely Boned:
4
JI - May 5, 2008
You're doing it wrong
Days until we’re completely boned
-35
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
-180
Llewdor - May 5, 2008
is it too early to just give up?
I love them and they just keep hurting my fellings over and over and over.
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
Break up!
Group therapy session imminent?
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
i don't know if a break is in order, but we might need to spend sometime apart.
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
So basically you're saying you're already seeing someone else
and this is just trying to soften the blow. WTF
IT’S THE A’S ISN’T IT. DAMN YOU!!!!
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
They can't hit worth shit and they have a fake Suzuki. WE HAVE ICHIRO!!
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
cubs, sorry
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
Psh, whatever
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
they have Fukudome
and a fisrt basemen who can hit and a 3rd basemen who is almost as cool
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
And they also have
a SELFISH LEFT FIELDER who thinks he gets THREE runs for 600 foot homers!
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
ha ha
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
Stop chopping down trees!
Is felling really that important right now?
Llewdor - May 5, 2008
shit feelings
I’ve donng that a lot this morning.
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
We could hold a fan press confrence to let the Mariners know we have decided to see other people
thewyrm - May 5, 2008
Wait so this hacker POS erased my drunken playoff guarantee?
What a fucker!
Alright, I guarantee we make the playoffs, even though I am currently sober
dbroncos31 - May 5, 2008
I guarantee the playoffs will occur this season
anyone think that someone said that in 1994 too?
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
I guarantee that the World Series will have one NL team in it
pdb - May 5, 2008
I guarantee that it will also have one AL team in it.
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
I guarantee the World Champ will win 4 games in the World Series
Gomez - May 5, 2008
I guarantee the first team to win 12 games in the playoffs will be World Champions.
eponymous_coward - May 5, 2008
You only need 11 playoff wins to win the World Series...
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
Not if you need a one game tiebreaker for the division.
Fin - May 5, 2008
Not a playoff game. Check the Rockies record from last season
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
I'm sure the Mariners could make the playoffs
They probably have an inside angle on tickets, being MLB employees after all.
eponymous_coward - May 5, 2008
I laughed
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
He also erased my post about not yet giving up hope
the hacker has a profound sense of symbolism.
JeffS - May 5, 2008
do you mind reposting
because like those stupid insurance commercials
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
i'm there
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
We're currently working to restore old posts that got deleted
but we’ve never had to do this before, and the database is huge, so it’ll be a little bit.
JeffS - May 5, 2008
it's not hacking if you do it yourself
we’re on to you now.
pdb - May 5, 2008
I will go with my instincts that it was Jon Garland
He erased all the tRA stuff too.
dbroncos31 - May 5, 2008
This has to be true
JeffS - May 5, 2008
Except the specific 'Jon Garland is a lucky Jeff Weaver' diary
This confuses me no end
Graham MacAree - May 5, 2008
FanPost
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
Fuck you I call them what I like
Graham MacAree - May 5, 2008
Except they're called FanPosts
if you started calling tRA “Graham’s super duper cool pitching stat,” no one would know what it meant! I’m just going for consistency here!!
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
Yes they would
Graham MacAree - May 5, 2008
Everyone likes Graham's super duper cool putching stat.
Llewdor - May 5, 2008
Haha putching
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
Haha BLAM!
K-klunk
Llewdor - May 5, 2008
Garland was trying to deflect attention
Luckily we have Igawa on our side
dbroncos31 - May 5, 2008
Well, if someone sees tRA posted somewhere else claiming it to be their work... we know who it was
does Jon Garland have a blog?
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
Ok so
I just got a text that said, “The Mariners have dealt IF Greg Norton to the Braves for a player to be named later or cash considerations”. What the hell? I thought we just shit canned him?
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
He had 10 days to be traded from Wednesday
Graham MacAree - May 5, 2008
got it. Thanks. I don't know any of those rules
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
To the Braves?
Do I smell a Lillibridge flip? No, I guess that’s just my socks.
pdb - May 5, 2008
nasty
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
Player to be named later...
Rafael Soriano.
It’s only fair.
Frosty Raptor - May 5, 2008
I'd rather have Brent Lillibridge
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
no shit we got rolled
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
Rickrolled
I love the thought of John Schuerholz rickrolling Bavasi down the phone repeatedly.
Alex B - May 5, 2008
Titles of the next 13 Scherholtz text messages to Bavasi
We’ve know each other for so long
You know the rules, and so do I
A long commitment’s what I’m thinking of
You wouldn’t get this from any other guy
I just want to tell you how I’m feeling
Gotta make you understand
Never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and desert you
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you
Here, take Brent Lillibridge
Gomez - May 5, 2008
I'm entirely OK with this if the end result is getting Brent Lillibridge
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
Hehe
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you
Alex B - May 5, 2008
Getting Brent Lillibridge will close the circle on the Bedard trade.
Fin - May 5, 2008
We flipped Norton to the Braves?
Hmm…..
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
How much money do you think Bavasi got for Norton?
$50? $200? More?
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
Just a reach-around.
Llewdor - May 5, 2008
a $100 gift certificate to Chilli's
and the change in John Smoltz’s pockets.
lyleleander - May 5, 2008
He got his drink tab covered at the next GM meetings.
eponymous_coward - May 5, 2008
He should get drunk at the meetings
He will make terrible trades anyway, so they might as well be rediculously crazy drunkard trades as well.
thewyrm - May 5, 2008
hehe
That brings up an interesting question. Do you think the owners or upper management of a team would have any recourse with the league if a GM got trashed and made a horrible trade?
Like, say, Clement and Triunfel for Kerry Wood and Corey Patterson.
I mean, you have to wonder sometimes when you see GMs in any sport making trades that a fourth grader who doesn’t even know what a jock-strap is would be able to tell you is shit.
lyleleander - May 5, 2008
SPRING BREAK WOOO
Graham MacAree - May 5, 2008
I would so organize "scouting trips" to Cancun
Or better yet, can you see Bavasi stumbling around the French Quarter with a half empty hurricane from Pat O’Brians in his hand screaming “Show me your tits!”
thewyrm - May 5, 2008
Creepy Girls Gone Wild Infomercial guy:
The party doesn’t get started ‘till Bill Bavasi makes the scene! Bill: “I aint got beads, but you can show me your tits for a prospect or two!”
thewyrm - May 5, 2008
Well, the DR DOES have resorts there...
eponymous_coward - May 5, 2008
No, send him to Mexico
JI - May 5, 2008
Yeah
Like Carlos Guillen for Ramon Santiago…
...ah son of a bitch.
Frosty Raptor - May 5, 2008
I was thinking more like Soriano for HoRa-aw, crap.
eponymous_coward - May 5, 2008
Speaking of which
I am imagining Greg Norton having a stellar year in Atlanta, as a pinch hitter or whatever they will have him doing there. And Bill Bavasi will have nothing to show for it.
Fin - May 5, 2008
Except his drink tab
don’t forget his drink tab
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
Also:
Why is Duran Duran playing 2B for the Rangers?
eponymous_coward - May 5, 2008
You mean this fella???
Fin - May 5, 2008
increasingly desperate for relevance in the 21st century
they’ll do whatever it takes.
pdb - May 5, 2008
tigers just dfa'd jaques jones
whatever.
lyleleander - May 5, 2008
BrianL - May 5, 2008
I already tried
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
I thought a visual might be helpful.
BrianL - May 5, 2008
I think that the right hand shift key is the most useless of all the keys.
JI - May 5, 2008
scroll lock.
darmok - May 5, 2008
Pause.
And F4. Also, this little symbol: `
CapSea - May 5, 2008
F5, excuse me.
F4 Rules.
CapSea - May 5, 2008
F11 is the most useless function key in my opinion.
BrianL - May 5, 2008
All my f keys do different function
since I have a macbook. For example, F3 displays all the windows with expose, and F4 displays my dashboard, while F11 turns down the volume and F12 turns it up .
Fin - May 5, 2008
F10 is really important
and that’s the one key my keyboard is missing.
JI - May 5, 2008
Num Lock
Fucking Num Lock.
Paytheline - May 5, 2008
How would lock your number pad if there were no num lock?
JI - May 5, 2008
Insert.
I fucking hate insert. When I click it instead of “delete” and suddenly all my text starts overwriting itself. Fuck that. Who in the world needs that?
CapSea - May 5, 2008
Fuck that shit, indeed.
JI - May 5, 2008
I fucking hate insert too
Took me like 4 years to figure out it was insert that was overwriting my text all the time.
Fin - May 5, 2008
That may not be insert's fault
pdb - May 5, 2008
This may be the most useless sub thread in LL history.
JI - May 5, 2008
I was typing that when this posted.
CapSea - May 5, 2008
Hall of Fail?
CapSea - May 5, 2008
I blame it on Washburn starting tonight
Alex B - May 5, 2008
Might use
some of those keys with numbers on them on top of the letter keys.
Paytheline - May 5, 2008
No way. Number pads are far better.
But I have no number pad on my laptop, and I DO have a number lock… So… That may actually be the most useless key on my keyboard.
CapSea - May 5, 2008
I can use a num pad accurately without having to look down.
JI - May 5, 2008
What the hell are you talking about!?
The ten-key is God’s greatest gift to mankind.
BrianL - May 5, 2008
After breasts.
CapSea - May 5, 2008
Ah yes.
Breasts, then the ten-key.
BrianL - May 5, 2008
Also, Firefox.
But the 10-key is pretty high up there, to be sure.
CapSea - May 5, 2008
on my keyboard at work
F11 replicates the Z function on this here website.
pdb - May 5, 2008
Hey, mine too!
Which is good because my left hand just can’t handle game threads.
JI - May 5, 2008
Righties are weak.
CapSea - May 5, 2008
ZOMG NO POLITICS
JI - May 5, 2008
Well played.
I did not see that coming.
CapSea - May 5, 2008
F5 is refresh
Graham MacAree - May 5, 2008
nope
” ` ” is a tear: :`(
JI - May 5, 2008
No it isn't. An asterisk works better: :*(***
How is the tear leaving from the far left of the eye. I think not.
CapSea - May 5, 2008
looks like a booger
JI - May 5, 2008
So does your face.
Snap.
CapSea - May 5, 2008
:`(
JI - May 5, 2008
@---<---------
CapSea - May 5, 2008
. .
O <=====
JI - May 5, 2008
fa-
BrianL - May 5, 2008
(_|_)
CapSea - May 5, 2008
JI - May 5, 2008
O....
K….
CapSea - May 5, 2008
It's too bad the new Dugouts will never approach
this type of hilariousity.
dbroncos31 - May 5, 2008
~~~~~~~~~~~~
who uses this??~~~ You can;t even use it to write Iba~nez
Fin - May 5, 2008
I do.
It means “about” or “roughly.”
So, Sexson is a ~.200 hitter.
CapSea - May 5, 2008
i use it ~5 times a day
darmok - May 5, 2008
You just have to click hard enough.
Ibañez. See?
Eyebrows - May 5, 2008
huh?
question marks? parenthses? brackets? asterisks?
Matthew - May 5, 2008
without parenthses
(you couldn’t do this)
JI - May 5, 2008
might be a decent option for RF
I don’t think Wlad is gonna be the answer.
MFAN - May 5, 2008
If Jacque Jones is the answer
Then I do not think the question relates to Wlad in any way.
Sec 108 - May 5, 2008
'Name a worse player than Wladimir Balentien'?
Graham MacAree - May 5, 2008
Jose Vidro.
JI - May 5, 2008
Not a question.
CapSea - May 5, 2008
Die
Graham MacAree - May 5, 2008
Dude. It's your language. Learn it.
Llewdor - May 5, 2008
"Who is not French?"
CapSea - May 5, 2008
Anyone who can help it
Alex B - May 5, 2008
I thought it was pretty clear.
The Who are British, not French.
Eyebrows - May 5, 2008
Matt Scherzer starting tonight for the D-Backs
23 innings in AAA Tucson: 38 K, 3 BB
4 1/3 perfect innings, 7 K’s in long relief in only MLB outing last week
vkut79 - May 5, 2008
And he's one crazy-eyed mofo
Alex B - May 5, 2008
Which one's the crazy one?!
BrettJMiller - May 5, 2008
He looks like a Real Doll.
Llewdor - May 5, 2008
Holy..... whoa!
How does that happen?
I’m probably gonna end up watching their game… cuz the M’s are pretty darn boring.
vkut79 - May 5, 2008
They call him Mad Max.
Goose - May 5, 2008
It's a bionic eye!
Like the $6million man! That’s why he has such good control!
Eyebrows - May 5, 2008
I think $6m was his signing bonus, oddly enough
Alex B - May 5, 2008
It's Max Scherzer
Goose - May 5, 2008
Looks like I was focusing so much on spelling his last name that I forgot about the first
vkut79 - May 5, 2008
ok so what happended to the html guide ? I was trying to embed something
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
The hacker blew up everything because he doesn't deserve to live.
BrettJMiller - May 5, 2008
prick
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
Video cannot be embedded with the new LL format.
You have to make it into a fanshot.
CapSea - May 5, 2008
well they're pricks too
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
I misread "Video" as "Vidro"
He is also a prick.
Alex B - May 5, 2008
No one wants to embed Vidro.
Not even is wife.
CapSea - May 5, 2008
You're right
She’s probably shacking up with Pepe.
I wouldn’t mind embedding him under a bus though.
Alex B - May 5, 2008
here is a letter I am sending to the M's regarding the up coming series. I was hoping to embed the youtube video
May 5, 2008
Dear Mariners (Except King Felix Hernandez, Erik Beddard, Adrian (Captain Awesome) Beltre, and Ichiro),
It saddens me to write this letter, especially after so many years, but you have broken my heart too many times. If you don’t change your ways, I’ll have to move on. I am not one to just toss around ultimatums, but I feel you have taken me for granted for too many years.
Time and time again, you’ve told me that you will change, that you will do better, but they are always hollow promises. Recently it seems you have become even more nonchalant, which I think could be my fault. Admittedly, I have been hanging out with people on the North-side of Chicago and in Tampa Bay. They are fun, but they still don’t hold a candle to what you and I had in the old days.
I will give you four days to me show you still care about us. Please don’t let me down.
Yours,
Neil
P.S.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PdZb2inh4YM
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
Bedard
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
thanks
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
Sorry, didn't want to be snarky
but it would look really bad if you sent an email to the Mariners and accidentally mis-spelled the name of the one of the star players
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
no thank you. I fixed before i sent it.
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
I think you meant
P.S.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0
Alex B - May 5, 2008
ass
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
Let me guess.. Rickroll?
Thingray - May 5, 2008
Yep.
Haven’t you memorised the URLs yet?
Llewdor - May 5, 2008
a funny rick roll
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
no such thing
pdb - May 5, 2008
This one is pretty funny:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I36f8uHHumk
CapSea - May 5, 2008
Woah, mindfuck
Try this one for size too. I think even pdb might find this one amusing:
8-bit Rickroll
Alex B - May 5, 2008
Knowing pdb, I doubt that.
But I find it entertaining.
CapSea - May 5, 2008
Not so much
but better than the standard rick roll if you must do one I guess.
pdb - May 5, 2008
King Awesome
BrettJMiller - May 5, 2008
I prefer captain becuase there's really only one king
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
Why not Duke Awesome, or Sultan Awesome
there’s lots of royalty out there.
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
I read that as
Satan Awesome.
Llewdor - May 5, 2008
Close enough
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
Yeah but that's not the nickname.
BrettJMiller - May 5, 2008
i am ok with being wrong
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
I just popped over to Bluebird Banter. Man that place is deserted.
Llewdor - May 5, 2008
I think we need a running "Player of the day" type deal like
Bluebird Banter’s Jay of the Day or Boyfriend of the Day at Royals Review.
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
seems too much like panther
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
Except without the word"panther"
and this might actually be witty too
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
Panther of the Day?
Llewdor - May 5, 2008
Halos Heaven does a panther of the game. Don't ask me why
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
Why?
Llewdor - May 5, 2008
becuase your mom told them to
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
Mom can be a bit ditzy like that.
Llewdor - May 5, 2008
Probably a joke that failed
Much like the Rev
Alex B - May 5, 2008
Scapegoat of the Day
Would seem more fitting in these dire times.
Alex B - May 5, 2008
Hmmmm
I could get on board with Scapegoat of the Day.
seattlebruin - May 5, 2008
or ass bag
InSpokane - May 5, 2008
Do other team's player count?
Omerta - May 5, 2008
limited control of reply button..
Omerta - May 5, 2008
MATT KATA!
Llewdor - May 5, 2008
Or how about
Bonds of the Day
Today’s BOTD is Barry Bonds
Alex B - May 5, 2008
Knowing the M's, our Bonds of the Day would probably be
Gary “U.S.” Bonds
Llewdor - May 5, 2008
Series EE Bonds
pdb - May 5, 2008
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