So you see why I wasn't ready to call last night a turning point, then.
What with SBN having scheduled downtime coming up in a little bit, I'm just going to take this opportunity to re-post (a slightly edited version of) what I wrote on Sunday afternoon, since (A) it's still applicable, and (B) no one saw it the first time since we got hacked like 20 minutes after I put it up. You'll notice that a line or two looks pretty much identical to what I put up last night but whatever I'm allowed to go back to that well if I want. And away we go.
----------
The season isn't over.
The season isn't over, and you shouldn't pay any attention to the people claiming otherwise, because they're overreacting. As bad as things have been, and as big as this hole has gotten, it's still the first week of May, and there's time to right the ship. Look at the standings a year ago today and the Rockies, Yankees, and Phillies were all sucking pretty hard. Not this hard, mind you, but what I'm trying to say is that we haven't reached the point at which it's time to give up.
But we're close. Closer than even the most pessimistic of Mariner fans would've thought we'd be this early. After 34 games, this team is tied with the Rangers and Tigers for the worst record in the American League. The worst. Worse than the Royals. Worse than the Orioles. Worse than the White Sox. Worse than everyone but the Rangers and Tigers, with whom we're tied. They're 7.5 back of the Angels and 6.5 back of the A's, and no matter what you thought of the M's playoff chances back in March, now they're down in the single digits. Thanks to a horrible first five weeks, the Mariners have made their season about five times more difficult. That's not really the start you're looking for when you've invested so much in winning right now.
No longer is this about simply being better than the Angels and the A's (who I definitely didn't see coming). Now this is about being significantly better than the Angels and the A's. Dave already outlined it here. Five months seems like a long time, but making up the ground the M's have lost will require that either they play really well, or their competition doesn't. And that would require that things turn around pretty much right now. The Mariners just can't afford to waste any more opportunities. They can't pull stupid stunts like getting owned by Baltimore - who blows - or getting swept in the Bronx by a mediocre team when they've got their top three starters on the mound. Things like that are inexcusable. It's stupid to say "good teams don't lose to Darrell Rasner Sidney Ponson" because shit happens and even the best teams go slumming from time to time, but when it becomes a pattern, that's a problem. This team has problems. And they need to be fixed as soon as possible, else everything the front office worked for be wasted effort by June.
For the next two weeks, the Mariners will play 11 more games against the Rangers, White Sox, and Padres, one average team and two cellar-dwellers. It's an easier stretch of schedule than those of the Angels and A's, and if the M's play well, they can jump right back into the thick of things in the division. The opportunity is there.
They just need to seize it. Because the alternative sucks.
God damn this team.
Biggest Contribution: Jose Lopez, +6.1%
Biggest Suckfest: Miguel Batista, -31.8%
Most Important AB: Lopez single, +6.2%
Most Important Pitch: Murphy homer, -8.9%
Total Contribution by Pitcher(s): -39.5%
Total Contribution by Hitters: -10.5%
Total Contribution by Opposition: 0.0%
(What is this chart?)

Do me a favor and spare us all the bullshit about how you want this team to lose 100 games so that there will be major changes up top.
(1) no you don't
(2) it's not an original thought
(3) it's not funny
(4) it's May 6th
(5) this team isn't going to lose 100 games
(6) there's no evidence that they'd make any major changes
(7) there's no evidence that they'd replace the current guys with anyone better
(8) executives smart enough to find a better GM wouldn't need a 100-loss season to do it
Seriously, just drop it. It's tired.
You know what isn't tired? Wlad!
0 recs | 113 comments
When you said 'slightly edited'
I was actually expecting you to use the Fresh Prince ending.
Gomez - May 6, 2008
Your mom's tired...
ningwers - May 6, 2008
Your shipwreck photo also reminded me of this old classic
Seemed appropriate after the last week (yesterday’s game notwithstanding)
ningwers - May 6, 2008
When does training camp open up?
BrettJMiller - May 6, 2008
When do pitchers and caters report?
SethGrandpa - May 7, 2008
*catchers
SethGrandpa - May 7, 2008
Its gonna be 10 miles away from my house! :-)
Robert - May 7, 2008
I like attention. >:(
JI - May 6, 2008
Here we gooooooo.....
ThundaPC - May 6, 2008
Well I know what shirt I'm wearing tomorrow.
BrettJMiller - May 7, 2008
On the bright side Josh Hamilton had a solid game.
I have a $20 bet with a friend at 30-1 odds that Hamilton will win at least 1 MVP during his career. If he plays us enough he’ll win one in no time
dbroncos31 - May 7, 2008
Lucky for you, he plays 1/9 of his games against us for the forseeable future
seattlebruin - May 7, 2008
By the way...
how far did that ball go? It was a shot, that is all I know.
elsid - May 7, 2008
Johs's Homerun
That ball was demurdurized (if it’s not a word, it should be) to the upper deck. I’m not sure where to find out how far it went (or was projected to go).
ThundaPC - May 7, 2008
*Josh
(Joh hasn’t hit squat yet.)
ThundaPC - May 7, 2008
Usually, Hit Tracker is awesome
but for some reason, they don’t have Hamilton’s homer up yet
Hit Tracker Online
seattlebruin - May 7, 2008
it's still flying
so they can’t calculate the final distance yet.
pdb - May 7, 2008
They never will.
It achieved escape velocity, which from there is about 30,000 m/s
Llewdor - May 7, 2008
I've been a reader for years, but only decided to post now
Because i would really love it if we started calling Balentien “Dubya.”
You know, Vlad/Wlad both in the AL West…
eday - May 7, 2008
Without violating the NO POLITICS ON LL rule
Because i would really love it if we started calling Balentien "Dubya."
Uh, no. The Curacao Crusher is a great nickname, and Dubya is, to be charitable, not.
pdb - May 7, 2008
I have to disagree.
The Curacao Crusher doesn’t shorten easily to something punchy.
Llewdor - May 7, 2008
It's still way better than Dubya or anything else we've come up with.
Jed MC - May 7, 2008
That's the whole point
it doesn’t NEED to shorten to something punchy. That’s the problem with nicknames today. People think “nickname” means W-Bal or something like that. I’m sticking with the Curacao Crusher, thanks.
pdb - May 7, 2008
Spot on
Aptness, wittiness and intelligibility are far greater attributes than punchiness when it comes to nicknames. Therefore: Curacao Crusher >>>>>>>>>> Dubya.
“Tienybopper”, anyone?
Alex B - May 7, 2008
The beauty of a good nickname is in its poetry
and you could write an entire story about someone called “The Curacao Crusher” without even knowing who it actually is. It evokes something bigger than a mere baseball player. It evokes a larger-than-life legend, someone who is capable of things us mere mortals can only dream of.
pdb - May 7, 2008
Willie Boom-Boom agrees
Alex B - May 7, 2008
Not to mention, I already have the sign in the works.
Since I will be taking it to at least 20 games this year I guarantee you it will be getting some exposure. And I just cannot agree enough with pdb on this one. Nicknames have become so lame in recent years. At least Curacao Crusher is different.
On another note, I guess that drink I made was pretty good because my wife requested I make one for her after dinner last night.
Sec 108 - May 7, 2008
Did you make up the nickname yourself, Sec 108?
Because it’s definitely the best nickname I’ve heard for an M’s player since… I can’t remember. Maybe A-Rod, since that was actually original at the time
seattlebruin - May 7, 2008
If you look at my Diary err FanPost
I linked to article that said he had already been called that. I scoured a ton of articles about him and that was the one I liked best.
Sec 108 - May 7, 2008
Besides
You can always shorten it to Crusher if you’re in pinch, while maintaining Curacao Crusher as the full nickname
ningwers - May 7, 2008
I like this.
pdb - May 7, 2008
We can shorten it to CC or something later
catchy, although not terribly original, when asked what it stands for, we can say Curacao Crusher. Plus, “Three CC’s” is so much easier to say in a bar
seattlebruin - May 7, 2008
I don't like this
Stick with “Crusher”.
pdb - May 7, 2008
Was just a suggestion
I like just “Crusher” better too
seattlebruin - May 7, 2008
I'd just be worried that if you said "three CC's" in a bar
somebody would hand you a syringe full of heroin or something. Whereas if you made reference to “my friend Crusher” you’d probably never get harassed in a bar again.
pdb - May 7, 2008
Or, they might pour you three glasses of Canadian Club rye whisky.
And that wouldn’t be so bad.
Llewdor - May 7, 2008
This is true.
pdb - May 7, 2008
Can't we just call him "Curacao"?
ThundaPC - May 7, 2008
BLUE!
I’m calling him Blue.
There. That’s punchy.
Llewdor - May 7, 2008
At least we didn't get shut out?
Graham MacAree - May 7, 2008
First picture that comes up when I googled "at least we didn't get shut out?"
Fin - May 7, 2008
I'm scared to do that with the content filter off
Frosty Raptor - May 7, 2008
Just the idea of the Moose and Rule 34 together frightens me
Gomez - May 7, 2008
That didn't come up at all for me
One of Mike Timlin did though
ralphie81 - May 7, 2008
Sure enough
there’s Mike Timlin on page two.
BrianL - May 7, 2008
Liar
Wilder. - May 7, 2008
You forgot the quotations, homeslice.
CapSea - May 7, 2008
Not liar
Wilder. - May 7, 2008
Skipping the game thread is a good thing sometimes
Went out, had a few beers with some friends, and now I’m totally zen about all of this. Whereas if I’d been here and watching the game as it happened I’m sure I would be filled with the urge to find the nearest living thing and squeeze the life out of it.
OlSalty - May 7, 2008
Yeah it was pretty bad
I turned off the tv when it was 5-0.
phil333 - May 7, 2008
I gave up in the first inning.
It’s the fastest I’ve ever given up on a baseball game before.
Hey Miguel! Lose faster, please!
seattlebruin - May 7, 2008
Oddly enough the game threads for bad games tend to be the most entertaining
ningwers - May 7, 2008
Lopez biggest contribution! Wooo
Told you! Hall of Famer!!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Slica - May 7, 2008
I dunno...
If he would’ve grabbed the ball in the third inning, for the third out, that would’ve stopped the bleeding. A 3-0 deficit is less intimidating than a 10-0 deficit. After watching the replay, that ball looked gettable.
PositivePaul - May 7, 2008
Yeeeahhh
that was definitely gettable. I’d like to say it had spin on it, but the hop looked normal/true. Just right under his glove.
That would’ve made things different.
marc w - May 7, 2008
I had a dream last night
that Yuni died. Weird shit. I wasnt even thinking about the Mariners heading towards bed…but yeah, I was told in the dream he was bleeding out his ear. Went to surgery, and didnt make it.
Wild shit. I woke up a little shocked, but fell back asleep quite quickly…
Slica - May 7, 2008
Whoa, I just ate a whole box of Hostess Donuts and drank a liter of Dr. Pepper
This is what it must feel like to give up 10 runs to the Rangers.
Frosty Raptor - May 7, 2008
Sec 108, was it you who dropped that HR from Murphy?
Whoever it was, that fan mimiced the M’s by dropping the ball.
Jed MC - May 7, 2008
I was at home last night.
I think the person in our seats was a random who bought the tickets from my buddy.
Sec 108 - May 7, 2008
You picked a good night to stay home...
redwolf75 - May 7, 2008
Whiffey is not your savior!
John Brattian’s Bringing up Junior article posted at the Hardball Times notes some of the interesting memories from the 2000 Griffey Jr. trade. Here’s one of them…
A nitwit poster named “Gallagher” who spammed the Cinci.com message board after the trade with tirades about what a mistake the Reds had made in acquiring Griffey. His usual refrain was “WHIFFEY IS NOT YOUR SAVIOR!!”
Heh. Somebody needs to make that into a sign and stick in Chuck Armstrong’s office.
Frosty Raptor - May 7, 2008
Dear God
It hurts. It physically hurts to read that. Man, in 1999, it seemed like a WS was inevitable with Junior, A-Rod and the pitchers we had (Freddy, Moyer,
RoidsRyan Franklin, Aaron Selebefore he fell off a cliff, Sasaki, et. al)seattlebruin - May 7, 2008
Needs more disaster
seattlebruin - May 7, 2008
I approve.
rtang - May 7, 2008
I <3 Wlad.
So as long as he and Clement are still playing, I really couldn’t care less how they do unless they suddenly surge to the playoffs.
CapSea - May 7, 2008
I like how in the past week
Drunkeness has increased ten fold on LL.
Robert - May 7, 2008
Losing'll do that to a man
and his liver
ningwers - May 7, 2008
I wonder when we will hit our Balmer peak
Robert - May 7, 2008
There are no Royals fans left
They all drank themselves to death…. well, except for royalsreview, but still.
Gomez - May 7, 2008
I also like how pictures of shipwrecks have increased tenfold this week
seattlebruin - May 7, 2008
JI - May 7, 2008
Now your typos are spreading to you posting pictures
Robert - May 7, 2008
This comment made me laugh out loud.
Well played, sir. Well played.
BrianL - May 7, 2008
JI - May 7, 2008
So listening to KOMO 1000 this morning
I learned that 7 out of the 10 lowest attendance totals ever at Safeco Field have occurred this season. Furthermore, ESPN says that the Mariners are 20th in the league as far as attendance average goes at 26,000 (a poster at USSM points out that Milwaukee is outdrawing us by 8000 per game).
Has the “ballpark experience” factor that keeps making money for the FO worn off?
BrianL - May 7, 2008
Kinda
but it’s also really early in the season (so it’s cold), the M’s are playing, uh, not well, and they’re not playing marquee teams. I fully expect that Friday/Saturday/Sunday games will sell a ton more tickets once the weather gets warm – not selling-out numbers, but back into the mid-20K range.
pdb - May 7, 2008
I still have to think this is a troubling trend
for the ownership/Lincoln/Armstrong.
BrianL - May 7, 2008
It happens every year
so I don’t think they’re that troubled by it. What you’re seeing is the definition of “casual fans” – the only fans at the park this time of year are the hardcores, the more casual “hey let’s go to the ballpark why not?” fans don’t start showing up until it’s shorts weather.
pdb - May 7, 2008
Although if they keep playing this poorly through May and June
could we be looking at a season-long attendance drop-off? The allure of watching a middling team seems to be fading.
BrianL - May 7, 2008
I'd have to look it up
but I’d wager that attendance has dropped every year since 2003 – I used to track it, in an effort to justify putting a better team on the field, but then the M’s got so bad it stopped mattering so much. And again, I’m not sure how much management cares, at least in a “attendance is falling so we’d better get a better team on the field” way.
This is not, historically, a team that has had stellar attendance – Seattle’s a place with so many other things to do, and the media environment is such that even Seattleites aren’t forced into only watching the Mariners. So to expect a mediocre team to come close to selling out Safeco every night is probably something even management doesn’t expect, or worry about too much.
I’m not saying this is a good strategy, but it seems to be their mode of operations.
pdb - May 7, 2008
So I guess the question is
at what point does falling attendance catch ownership and management’s attention? Does it ever?
BrianL - May 7, 2008
I don't think so
I think that’s my point – it can’t have not caught their attention, and they don’t really seem to care – at least as I define “care” (field better team, challenge for division regularly, attendance goes/stays up).
pdb - May 7, 2008
So...
Further proof we’re stuck with Lincoln and Armstrong until they die/retire?
Today is a very depressing day.
BrianL - May 7, 2008
But your shift key meme worked on bholdr
so not all is lost
seattlebruin - May 7, 2008
I still need to send that image to Jim Street.
BrianL - May 7, 2008
Yup.
Anybody that believes they’re going away soon doesn’t really get how the Mariners operate. Yamauchi and the ownership group are happy with the job Lincoln and Armstrong are doing, by all accounts, and it’s their toy to do with as they please.
pdb - May 7, 2008
I think I need a happy song.
BrianL - May 7, 2008
Attendance figures for the M's
2001 – 3,507,326 ave 43,300
2002 – 3,542,938 ave 43,300
2003 – 3,268,509 ave 40,352
2004 – 2,940,731 ave 36,305
2005 – 2,725,459 ave 33,648
2006 – 2,481,165 ave 30,632
2007 – 2,672,223 ave 32,990
They were 1st in attendance in the AL in 2001 & 2002. 2nd in 2003, 3rd in ‘04, 4th in 05, 6th in ‘06 and ‘07.
MfaninAlaska - May 7, 2008
correction
2001 average was 43,300
2002 average was 43,740
MfaninAlaska - May 7, 2008
Yeah, DMZ had a few good points about this
The cold weather alone makes a night at the park a hard sell. Add in losing, meh pitching and a meh opponent, and I wouldn’t be surprised if an usher had the LF bleachers all to himself again.
Gomez - May 7, 2008
Stadium's almost ten years old
another overlooked factor – of the two horrible years (04-05), Ichiro got 262 hits one of the years, and that in and of itself was a big draw for them
seattlebruin - May 7, 2008
That's the answer.
The Mariners obviously need a new stadium. I mean, how can they be expected to be competitive in their current, outdated stadium?
pdb - May 7, 2008
MOVE THOSE FUCKERS TO OKLAHOMA CITY
God knows my life would probably have less anger in it without the Mariners around
seattlebruin - May 7, 2008
but it would also have less beer threads.
which is problematic.
pdb - May 7, 2008
It would also have less beer
seattlebruin - May 7, 2008
Is it still illegal to serve beer on Sundays in South Carolina?
Llewdor - May 7, 2008
As of 2-4-08
yes
seattlebruin - May 7, 2008
Nice laws.
I Alabama, it is illegal to serve draft beer except “in rural communities with a predominantly foreign population”.
That’s awesome.
Llewdor - May 7, 2008
Move the fences in
Duh.
Gomez - May 7, 2008
I wonder if Kenji could hit a homer here
Maybe with this guy as the pitcher, too
seattlebruin - May 7, 2008
Results still the same
Weak grounder to third.
BrianL - May 7, 2008
Kid's got a brutal two-seamer.
Teej - May 7, 2008
High Desert?
Wait, can’t be… there’s actual vegetation.
Gomez - May 7, 2008
Fences won't get moved in
Until Griffey has re-signed, retired, and given his blessing.
Alex B - May 7, 2008
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