Lookout Landing

I'm so glad Kenji is batting right now

Jeffie?

Well that was different.

I'm so glad Clement didn't pinch hit there

I don't think he can...or can he?

He's out until Saturday.

Aaron Campeau - July 23, 2008 reply

Fuck Kenji's extension

Fuck Kenji's existence

fixed that for you.

kevin_ess - July 23, 2008 reply

[deleted, dead meme]

[coat hangered meme]

Bryan LaHair, please return to AAA.

God, those last two swinging strikes were so far inside...

Well done LaHair

LaHair looks like LaShit and LaPlate

chinn - July 23, 2008 reply

*at

chinn - July 23, 2008 reply

We need the "Game still in question?" gif

Or "Putz in! Hey that guy that created the save just died, can we stop counting this stupid stat!?"

Ahahahaha

Rick Biggerstaff?

What

He doesn't have to rub it in everyone's faces

Why does she have a mic?

Yeah I was asking the same thing.

So they can find her in the crowd?

I think it was fixed.

The two rally fries girls looked like the recipient’s sisters.

Who the fuck drinks Ketchup?

That chick.

So two girls and one cup is what you are saying...

There was no evidence she actually squeezed ketchup in her mouth.

But you would be surprised what stupid things people do.

Apparently she can hear the people in the booth so if they have questions she can forward the answer.

For instance, since she can hear in the booth she might respond back:

“Yes, Rizz. I am wearing a thong today.”

I think we missed all three of Krueger's keys

but it’s still a tie game. WTF?

If they win he will still give himself three checks.

Girls are dumb:

The cap is on

I'd cap that

Underage Banned.

The cap on American Ketchup has hole as to squeeze the Ketchup through.

I can't stand ketchup

I'm not a huge fan.

Guys are dumb

(Shows every clip of Raul playing ‘defense’)

I think looking at her mother explains a lot of this.

Mom's pissed she's drinking it all. Mom's not going to share her jar of mayonaise now.

kevin_ess - July 23, 2008 reply

Exactly.

I had a friend who’s sister would eat margarine by the spoonfuls. It was gross.

Inappropriate joke.........will not be said........

I think I see where you were going there.

Good choice to keep it to yourself.

You know who keeps it to themselves...Robert.

Why?

Gross

I like how you're careful to say these things when I'm away.

Could have been sarcastic

You're never sarcastic.

JJ!

yay!

Wow. Good J.J. is back!

Every time Dustin Pedroia makes an out an angel gets his wings.

TRADE JJ!

Still would be selling low

KEEP JJ AND SEND MORROW DOWN TO TRIPLE A

I know..I just like yelling "Trade someone" after they do something good.

I think we gotta pray he stays healthy the rest of the year and then look at trading him over the winter.

JJ for Chris Duncan.

plus it would mean Morrow gets stuck as a closer

NOOOOOOOOOOO

Fields

Right, because the Mariners are noted for not using established veterans as closers

I was hoping someone would say 'Pastures'....and then I'd say 'Paddock'

Did they sign him yet?

According to Kevin Goldstein, it's a done deal.

But it’s the annual “wait around and don’t announce it so the market doesn’t get inflated” period.

Teej - July 23, 2008 reply

I'm feeling a walkoff in this game.

Anyone else?

I would have walked out after Felix was taken out.

I hate him so much

You should moderate him out of spite.

Who?

Tacoby.

Wheee

Woo, 97MPH swinging strike.

MORROW 4 CLOSER 4 EVAH!111!!!11

Let's go Strasburg?

Do Felix Day rules apply if he can't get the win?

Normally, no. But let's do it for the Rays.

Sounds good to me.

Besides, with our luck, Strasburg will be out of slot. >:(

Like, say, Josh Fields?

We went over slot to sign him?

I’m making this face…

$750K over slot is what I've been hearing

Nice that we did this for a college reliever

as opposed to, say, a shortstop.

They need to fix the system.

The system was supposed to be the fix.

Now it’s corrupt.

They need set $$$ amounts for each pick.

But but but but... inflation!

Multipliers!

Awesome Putz is back woooooo

I like this new/old Putz

Someone score so this does not turn into another 37 inning game.

Don't try to hide it.

You know you want to see Burke pitch again.

A Willie is fine too.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with that happening

Robert - July 23, 2008 reply

I love the long games

Frightening.

I leave for a half hour to commute home and we tie the game!?

GOD

Rizzs!

By a Vidro home run nonetheless.

With a man on base!

With the hotdog vendor about to leave the dugout area!

Awesome D, guys.

Outfielder is supposed to call for that ball.

Nice play Raul.

Goddamn it Raul.

I blame you for that.

Hahaha, how did Beltre beat Raul to that

Oh wait I know how

Adrian's not a reanimated corpse?

It's been awhile since we've hauled out the ol' Zombie Shakespeare GIF for Raul

OH NOES WE'RE USING OUR CLOSER IN A NON-SAVE SITUATION.

THERE IS ONE RIGHT ANSWER BLOWERS

He sort of got it.

Answer him Blowers

You fail you genital belch

Eeeew.

Aaron Campeau - July 23, 2008 reply

Wow. Gameday must be far behind the real thing.

Sit down, jackass.

Wait, so what's the situation? I have 1 out with Coco Crisp up and 1-2 count

Make that two out

Make that 3 out

1-1 to Ellsbury now

Inning over

I guess I'm confused then. I saw people above bitching about Raul and Beltre. No idea where that was from.

On a foul ball

I think it was the 2-0 pitch to Varitek.

Jaco power!

I know a Sox fan who said, before the season began, that Ellsbury was a better player than Grady Sizemore.

He denies it now, but the fucker is on record in writing. He probably feels really really stupid.

Ellsbury may yet turn into one hell of a player...

...but Sizemore is an absolute beast.

I wonder if the announcers talking about Morrow starting presages something?

Normally they’re the mouthpieces of the team…

They've talked about it before and nothing happened

Batista vs Parrish on Friday. That will be a lot of fun.

I think you misspelled "agony"

I think we should redo the Meche gif for Beluga Tits.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Damn you! I’m going to that game. Maybe I’ll take my laptop, I can get a lot of work done.

Faux - July 23, 2008 reply

Good God, we're going back to Toronto again?

Invasion pt. 2

Then to Texas!

2 countries on one trip.

Erin Andrews is the only good thing about ESPN.

zomg she has boobies

I think we would prefer Erin Andrews as a streaker

I'm guessing there's a streaker on the field.

Probably a Red Sox fan.

Somebody did this during a Rays/Red Sox game at Fenway this year

I bet you're right.

Do you think the security guards would tackle a streaker?

My favorite situation

Bottom of 9th or extras, tie game

I thought you were going to say:

Shirtless guy with cheesy asian tattoos.

I typed that before the field situation

Okajima looks disapointed by the streaker

Another one?

...pinch hit Yuni?

What a silly move.

Gotta give the fans what they want

He probably has squeak toys in his shoes today

Needs more hacking.

Betancourt PHing?

bwhahahaha

Wait, was there really a streaker?

If so, $200 says it was a Red Sox fan.

He was wearing pants.

You could see they were off his ass

He may have planned on streaking

That or he had plumber's butt

From Boston?

Probably plumber’s butt.

I hate him

Me too.

I bet you hate him even more now.

"Boy, he stroked that well."

Yeah, Sims!

I hate him

Ooooh...

So that’s what a good left fielder looks like.

Strange.

Good, defensive left fielder.

Offensively, Manny would have been out there.

CAIRO WILL SAVE US!

...pinch hit Miguel Cairo?

Cairo PHing?

BWHAHAHAHAHA

We are pinch hitting with Miguel Cairo

...

PLAYING THE PERCENTAGES!

You know how Vidro's a different kind of DH?

substitute “Cairo” and “pinch hitter” and you have Riggleman’s logic.

Miguel Cairo is our hope to keep out of extra innings?

Help us, Jeebus?

PH Yuniesky Betancourt. PH Miguel Cairo

KILL ME.

Revert back to

suck lineup.

Does this mean our lineup is good or bad?

So true.

Now bad

because all of the parts that we can at least feel good cheering for (Reed, LaHair) are now replaced with even more gritty heroes and impatient hitters.

Sigh.

I can't cheer much for LaHair.

He’s just not all that good. Reed could be a serviceable 4th outfielder though.

Yeah -

but I would rather see him do well rather than Cairo. Cairo success = more PT = :(

Same argument could be made for LaHair

I was really expecting a Cairo home run

Cairo walks?

Vidro has walked and homered already

This game clearly is not of this world

Throwing in the towel

WFB

Let my avatar guide the way

If WFB wins this for us, I'm going to shoot my TV

Willie Bloomquist XBH, right here.

If Carl Crawford can get an XBH off of Delcarmen, anyone can

They fear Willie. Have to bring in the righty.

Red Sox obviously afraid to throw to Cairo...

wait, what?

dkulich - July 23, 2008 reply

Maybe they're thinking about how he used to be a great power hitter

Wrong Miguel.

His ears have a gravitational pull...they are afraid if they threw to him it'd be a HBP.

That's how he can call pitches from the bench.

He can hear the seams gripping the air on a curve.

WFB walkoff HR incoming

I hope this goes 19 and we run through every fresh arm they got.

I hope so too

Burke for pitcher!

My vote goes to Beltre this time around

Ichiro!

pakipaki - July 23, 2008 reply

I want to see this once in his time with the M's

marc w - July 23, 2008 reply

470 era rofl

Willie might be overmatched here.

Might?

Is

What a scrappy groundout

He puts the crap in scrap

Well that was unexpected.

Astonishing.

Why are you astonished?

That’s what everyone thought would happen.

You mean Yuni/Cairo/Bloomquist couldn't bring in the winning run?

Shocking.

Why are you shocked?

That’s what everyone thought would happen.

That's...different.

Astonished is too big a word

I'm....fucking surprised.

Graham didn't go to Cambridge to use small words

Nope, just aluminium.

sound byte plz

I can't do it.

I don't get why that'd be such a hard word to say.

I say it correctly

*hilariously

Austounisheud-u

Is Pedroia like 3-feet tall?

Like?

Is

He's three apples high.

(also known as a Boone)

I'm guessing 5'3"

Oh my God this 22" widescreen LCD monitor is GLORIOUS.

ICHIRO ICHIRO ICHIRO

ICHIRO!!

OWNED!

Ichiro!

OH YEAH

WOO-HOO!

Too bad his skills are declining, right?

His defense is a bit less great.

Looked okay there.

He's had two bad misplays this week.

I know, but that happens to the best of 'em.

Still it's gone back a bit this year.

An off year for Ichiro is still pretty damn good though.

"less great"

ICHIRO!!!!!

Ichiro is dreamy

Ichirowned.

Wow Ichiro made a sick play there.

Understatement

It also helped that Drew is a retard.

It isn't June anymore.

Probably being extra aggressive since it's a tie ballgame.

lets go mariners

/s st pete

Here comes an Ichiro FB.

fb?

funk blast

Christian - July 23, 2008 reply

Oh god please

pleasepleasepleaseplease

So to those of us without a tv..what happened?

Fly ball to RF

Ichiro caught it and threw it to first to double up Drew.

ohh, that play...nice heads-up play by ichiro...i dunno why drew was so far off the base...

hit and run.

Christian - July 23, 2008 reply

Ichiro

Runs down a flyball and throws to 1B for a DP.

LD DP 9-3

pop up to CF

I like this response the best.

my bad, i thought you were talking about ichiro's atbat

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

So it's becoming apparent that this team has no faith in Reed at all

Faith?

zomg no religion!

Beltre woulda swung at that.

Christian - July 23, 2008 reply

The Immortal Sean Green warming up in the bullpen

The Rays will trade you Gary Glover, and he will become your closer

we'll even throw in hammel

Only if you take Jarrod Washburn off our hands.

We already have James Houser, AKA Washburn 2.0

Also I think it would benefit us more if you gave him to the yanks

We'd probably throw in him the rotation.

*throw him in

I'll forgive you guys for 95

If you walkoff Boston right now.

pollo - July 23, 2008 reply

Fuck the Yankees.

We only play for the Rays.

And ‘95 is nothing compared to ‘00 and ‘01.

I think its funny how it still bothers them

Robert - July 23, 2008 reply

Well when you cough up a 2-0 lead in a best of five series...

and go on to win 4 World Sreies in 5 years...

Doesn't really evoke sympathy, does it?

Didn't they choke away a 3-0 lead in a 7 game series too?

I think I heard something about that a few years back

When the Yankees collapse

they collapse in historic fashion.

A-Rod's fault.

Like WTC-historic fashion?

Huh?

These 2 buildings in New York city collapsed in historic fashion.

I thought it said WTO

Your eyes are making typos now

Bahaha

Graham beat me to it.

I thought that was already understood.

If I recall correctly that was a pretty disastrous affair as well.

Wasn’t that the one where there were douchebags rioting in Seattle?

Anarchist douchebags from Eugene.

Yep.

Fucking hippies

Actually, I guess anarchists aren't all that hippy. The hippies are off the hook!

Weren't they protesting at the Nike store and were wearing Nikes?

I think that's just an urban myth.

You must not have lived in Seattle 15 years ago.

I must not live in Seattle right now.

Me too.

Nine years ago.

Teej - July 23, 2008 reply

You are probably right.

It’s been 8 years since I lived in the Seattle area and I can’t gauge when some things happened in Seattle very well.

I wish Yankee stadium would collapse in historic fashion while they're playing the Red Sox

That would be the best thing ever.

It's like St. Louis fans being upset about the Haren trade.

Except four times over.

fuck you

Yeah, it sucks, but you won a World Series after the trade.

Could have had 2.

Greedy.

Smart.

Don't rise to the bait.

Lopez has learned from Beltre.

It's a good thing he didn't learn from Yuni

Or he’d try to bat left handed while standing on his head

We're boned

So boned

Jay making a comeback?

Everytime Rocco Baldelli gets on base on his rehab stint, good things happen. Welll..

Rocco Baldelli hit by pitch.

THE MARINERS ARE GONNa WIN THE WORLD SERIES.

*in 2067.

That early?

I know, I thought we'd all be dead.

Not until I write my "Now I Can Die In Peace" book.

You'll win 60 in a row, rockies style

Even if we do that, we still miss the playoffs.

I think we're set if we win 98 games

I 100% believe this.

marc w - July 23, 2008 reply

Why a stoplights on I-90 trivia question?

Seattle-Boston

Ah HA!

What a terrible road record.

RULE ONE: YOU DO NOT ALLOW BASE HITS TO JASON VARITEK AT ANY TIME, FOR ANY REASON

Fuck-you-Co-Co!

CLAP CLAP CLAPCLAPCLAP

What a silly out

He probably glued the ball to his hand so he couldn't throw it to first

Wow, this is more exciting than the All-Star game.

Just let Burke pitch and get it over with.

But his trade value!

Vidro/Beltre/Yuni/Kenji/Cairo/Willie

How the hell are we going to score a run?

Beltre FB.

Our only hope

Beltre solo homerun on a head level pitch while he crouches.

Best walkoff ever.

This game is still going?

Wow.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Bahahahahahahaha

TUUUUUURBO

Bwhahahahahahahaha!

That was impressive.

HAHAHA PAPLEBON SUCKS

GIF, GIF, GIF, GIF, GIF, GIF, GIF, GIF

MORE INNINGS

I feel psychic with the radio feed.

FUCK YOU PAPS

If Paps blows this I will make a post on how awesome The m's are

If Paps blows this I am making more Pat cards....

You're gonna do that anyway

...

Hm?

R.J. Anderson - July 23, 2008 reply

What hm?

I can't wait to see all those little kids sad faces when Smear blows this one.

Pat Smear?

*Paps

Yep, boned

There goes our scoring opportunity.

More free baseball!

My coworkers will be now be able to escape the office.

Stephanie the ballgirl

gives the ball to the M’s fan kid standing in between two Sox kids. Good on ya, Steph.

YOU NEED TO SCORE ON THAT YOU MISERABLE FAT FUCK

Scoring from first on a single to right?

YES

Do we have anyone on the bench available to pinch run?

Anyone?

Washburn

I'd consider it.

You need to watch more Tony LaRussa

I think you can get second hand grumpy from watching Tony LaRussa

Yes?

Time for Cairo and Willie to kill this rally dead

FUCK YOU PAPS

Wow Vidro... made it to third on a hit and run

Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

OH GOD NO NOT KENJI

This will end well.

It's okay.

We have Cairo and Bloomquist up next!

Graham

sorry for feeding the troll. I should’ve known better.

Don't worry about it

Jesus not Kenji

Like the next two guys in the lineup would be any better

Jesus not our lineup.

SQUEEZE

THE OUTFIELD

HIT THE BALL INTO THE OUTFIELD

I bet Kenji was told to just hit it hard somewhere.

A sac fly would be a little anticlimatic here.

Vidro would be running.

Hard. But quite foul.

Thanks.

Now it's time for a walkoff.

OK Seriously

Im now 100% convinced that “Kenji” is really a crazed Ben Davis in a Johjima mask, and the real Johjima is in Ben Davis’ basement.

Karma Police - July 23, 2008 reply

AHAHAHAHAHAHA

BALLS

good GOD

sixth - July 23, 2008 reply

WHAT THE FUCK

GO TO HELL KENJI YOU MISERABLE WASTE OF CARBON MATTER

Nice one, Kenji.

Yay!

Three more years, three more years!

DIE IN A FIRE KENJI

THREE YEAR EXTENSION

God Damit Joh.

AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAH

DIE DIE DEATH DEATH DIE DEATH

I am going to go get some food.

This game better be over before I get back.

Why does anybody actually want the game to end?

Because we want to be assured of our hold on first.

That...was disappointing.

That...was astonishing.

Boneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-d

I need like 3 more innings so I can get out of work without the traffic nightmare.

For a second I thought

that with a man on third and one out we might actually win.
I shouldn’t be so optimistic.

sixth - July 23, 2008 reply

WTF did they not bunt. They never bunt the guy in from third

they had plenty of opportunities in that game that Burke pitched as well

nwtrev - July 23, 2008 reply

Thou shalt not bunt

Squeezes are good.

Vidro running

You can't give up an out to win...duh

damn. my bad.

forgot where we were playing, who was batting and what team was on the field. sigh

nwtrev - July 23, 2008 reply

Use your shift key.

You beat me to it.

I was about to post a preemptive Shift gif

nwtrev - July 23, 2008 reply

bigger

And where you were posting.

We only bunt when it won't actually help us win the game

Kenji can't bunt for shit

Problem is he can’t do anything else for shit either (except GIDP)

sixth - July 23, 2008 reply

Because Joh can't bunt?

Proof?

Remember that time he bunted into a double play?

No.

Bunting is easier than hitting.

It's still not guaranteed success

Joh almost never bunts

I'll bet Burke can bunt

wow, Kenji is fucking awful

MFAN - July 23, 2008 reply

I was hoping Ellsbury would homer.

I heard Sean Green doesn't care about his right arm

Racist

I heard

he likes mudkips.

Ugh

that was horrible.

Don't worry, I didn't get it

Shame on you.

qft

He actually took some good hacks...

td32 - July 23, 2008 reply

God dammit.

IBB

This is not going to end well.

TIM BECKHAM COMMANDS THE M'S TO WIN

Timothy Beckham doubles (2) on a fly ball to left fielder Rafael Fernandez. Tomas Francisco scores.

walking Drew to get to Youk is not smart..

but we will find that out in 5 minutes.

pollo - July 23, 2008 reply

Assface DP FTW

Fuck you Willie.

GRITTY FAIL!

Wow... Good one Willie

Nice fucking defense

Bloomtastic!

HAHAHA WILLIE

TOO BAD REED IS A PILE OF SHIT WHO CAN’T HIT

:facepalm:

Willie you blow

you are the worst CF I have ever seen.

BAHAHAHAHAHAH DUMBASSS

Too bad it missed his face.

Have you guys won a game in extra innings this year?

J/w

2-4 in extras

2-5

Literally heard that coming.

What sound did it make?

Ohhhhuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuugghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

this one

www.sadtrombone.com

FrayLo - July 23, 2008 reply

I now have a new toy to play with.

Not as good as my rimshot.

Disagree.

Better

Awesome

I like clicking it a lot really quickly

Clement's probably out til Friday

But he can apparently hit.

At least he can hit, right?

Oh…wait…

/facepalm

FrayLo - July 23, 2008 reply

Er

Yay Strasburg

And there's your ballgame.

We lose

Not with a bang...

With a whimper.

Game Over.

I hate this team

THANKS FOR SUCKING YOU PIECES OF SHIT!

Well shit

Wow, Kenji sucks ass at blocking the plate

Hard to block the plate when the ball isnt' there.

When the throw is late, it’s not blocking the plate it’s interference.

Any complaints by Rays fans? Send them to the Mariners c/o Kenji Johjima.

Fuck Boston.

lol buck foston

red cox

dead box

I told you not to sleep with that chick, but you didn't listen

Sorry Rays.

We still get to sweep you, right?

By all means, please.

Maybe Price can make his debut vs. Felix

King Felix Vs. King David

I hope Felix doesn't face you guys.

David Price Vs. M's lineup = Hilarity

They don't have a normal DH you know.

R.J. Anderson - July 23, 2008 reply

We have 4 pitchers in our lineup

Does that mean Felix hits on off days?

No sweep then

I'd love to see the Mariners win.

I doubt it will happen, though.

:<

R.J. Anderson - July 23, 2008 reply

Thanks Mariners.

You ban me and now you lose the game. You’re about as useful as Gary Glover in a 2-1 lead over the Yankees.

This is killing our pythag.

Fuck it I'm watching the Simpsons

DENTAL PLAN

LISA NEEDS BRACES.

DENTAL PLAN

DENTAL PLAN

LISA NEEDS BRACES

Remember when the Marlins were trying to unload Lowell on anyone?

HgH works wonders….

td32 - July 23, 2008 reply

So Lowell took HGH so he could be strong enough to move the left-field wall 100 feet closer to him?

Teej - July 23, 2008 reply

hahaha

the correct capitalization

is hGH.

We could still come back

Lol?

Oh hey, he caught that one.

Holy crap Washington has a -106 run differential

-102 for San Diego.

How can we hope to match this kind of ineptitude?

*-104 for San Diego.

Fuck this I'm seeing Dark Knight again

good choice

I’m seeing it again tonight.

MFAN - July 23, 2008 reply

Me too!

Two Face needed his own movie

If you take all of the stuff about two face that happens after his big reveal out of the movie it’s like a top 10 all time move.

As it stands it was just very very good.

SPOILER ALERT:

THE JOKER HATES PENCILS

Atleast see a good movie

like Mamma Mia!

LFOJL is on it.

...when it comes on HBO

I'd see it.

The women dragged me to it.

I enjoyed it more than TDK.

Hehe...even comcast gave up on the game.

hahahaha

hahahaha

Would you like to play a game of lucky hit?

Hey, tying run to the plate!

Here is the false hope portion of our program.

Time for a walk-off FS

Oh awesome.

Everything rides on the Protector.

Vidro will save us!

Vidro, oh sweet irony.

Mark Whitten

HIT A GS VIDRO

GO FAILI...er...MARINERS!!

I know I’m late

Well we're fucked.

A different kind of DH for a better kind of world

Wait...Vidro 3-4?

Every whale has his day.

or not

3-5 with a FB?

not bad

DONT SWING

I SAID DONT SWING YOU STUPID BASTARD.

So do you guys still do the GIF thing

Take.

BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

A weak groundout, imagine that.

damn you vidro

5 in a row:
www.sadtrombone.com

FrayLo - July 23, 2008 reply

;_;

Fail

Sure glad Vidro was batting 4th.

He kept Raul from being walked.

http://instantrimshot.com/

haha

I told you pollo was bad news bear