SB Nation - Login for mobile commenting

Lookout Landing

7/6: Open Game Thread, Part 2

Why settle for nine innings of the Mariners when you can have more than nine innings of the Mariners?

0 recs  |  543 comments

Comments

FIRST
Die a thousand deaths in a thousand days of pancreatic cancer....

for using this dead meme.

He's in the box
And to think he'd only just got out the box as well
We need penalty box standings
LFOJL wins
He made a Clown Jeff
I also one upped your Riggleman o war
I saw that

Good job

I immediately regret opening a new thread
This thread has 100% less worst moment of your life
What now motherfucker

I'm trying to find a gif this moment
Nobody cares enough
Ichiro breaks a bat?

That’s odd.

There seem to have been so many today
I think I might finally get my 17 inning game
Riggleman O' War

My favorite part is how it's repulsive
You faggot. You call that a Riggleman o war?

LFoJL wins.
I'm new to this animorph thing

Are you not meant to be able to tell who it is?

I'd also be curious to see what a Rigglemantis would look like.

Has a nice ring to it for sure

I want to see a Riggle Me Elmo
Wow, I was trying to find some other source pics for that

and did a google search for manowar…

HE IS THROWING REALLY HARD
Mariners are blowing really hard
I really don't want to go to the penalty box...
Studs don't strike out ever
Fagdrian Fagfag
I can't believe it has come to this
I'm trying to dead meme that word
Protecting your people?
I've found the one type of person that it's completely inappropriate to call a "faggot" is a gay person
He needs to be penalty boxed
2 minutes for fagging
Fagging
Hmm, so links in subject lines don't work

Fagging

The right to fag carries with it certain well-defined duties. The senior, called fag-master, also known as the protector of his fags, is responsible for their happiness and good conduct.
English public school is fucking weird

I went to a normal school, I hasten to add.

Felix has not struck out this year
Felix has exclusively hit grand slams this year
He is our 3rd best hitter by WPA
I should be saddened by that fact.

But I’m not.

We are the best baseball team in the history of baseball teams
Hey look, Cesar Jimenez is effective
Hay, Cesr Iminez is is effettive?
Are Extra inning games worth it?

Is there any data out there that shows the effects on a team playing a prolonged extra inning game?

Is it always worth fighting for the win or at some point does the usage of pitchers become a detriment to the team?

I am interested.

Never give up.

Neva eva.

I like seeing the pitchers get exhausted and the coaches having to get creative

Didn’t a position player pitch last year?

I can't think of any studies off the top of my head

but any effect is likely to be less significant than the loss you incur by giving up in extra innings.

Sexson/Cairo/Burke

Looks like we’ve got another inning of baseball on tap.

...Clement will pinch hit
He's just started swinging
?? Not for Sexson??
Are they going to pinch hit Clement now, that Robertson is away?
Surprise Dickey Time!?
No-one expects the Dickey Inquisition
Oh Clement, you will be mine
You'll get penalty boxed around here for that kind of talk
Iannetta been in the box before
That Soria shame
Au Rilia?
Been done
Oh man

I missed the original thread in my defence

That is, I Hafner seen the original thread
Graham will never forgive you.
I want this game to go to 30 innings
Sexson has such great power.
Sexson tore the cover off that one.
CLEMENT STRETCHING.
Why has he not started swingng already?
Riggleman doesn't want to send him to the plate until there are two outs.

That way when he hits a homer he won’t kill a rally.

Hey look, Burke's on deck.
And now he's at the plate.

bluhhh

RALLY JIG RALLY JIG
Rally Lion?

But you can see actually see the face on this one!
Who Egypt power
So who is he going to pinch hit for now?
Sabathia --> Milwaukee

Breaking.

Well shit, didn't see that one coming.

He went to the BrewBears.
+1
See you in a few minutes
I think crappy puns are LFOJL-bait.
Well what do you know

I can’t believe the Indians are as bad as they are.

That's why they play the....

...ahh well, you know….

I'm pretty sure Strasburg is why they play the games
Ichiro plays the games as he cares about his own stats
Hafner - Roids = 2008 Hafner
Talk about a contract anchor now. 4Y/60M hasn't even kicked in yet.
Way worse than Mike Young
What do you make of the Lidge contract?

$39m for 3 years. My first instinct is “ouch” but I’m no expert.

The one that was announced today, that is
Fair value is my first impression.

Lidge was never as bad as he was made out to be those two years and he’s been really filthy. Still in this early 30s and only a three year deal?

Three years with a club option for a fourth

Maybe Lidge’s self-confidence is still low post-Pujols

Though I have some reservations about his K rate going forward.
I can't believe what he did in 2004
25.2% swinging strike rate.

Think about that. Over 1/4 pitches he threw was swung at and missed.

Antonetti probably handed Hafner the money

Why would we want him?

And Garko....

Him and Hafner must be using each other as support to kick the roid habit.

Antonetti needs to jump that train wreck and join a team that's going places

haha...

I was thinking the same thing….

but then, in theory, that would free up someone from the Rays!

Or they could just hoard
They're doing that enough already.
Tampa are responsible for MLB wage inflation by hoarding all the good young players
A Friedman/Antonetti FO would be so fucking awesome.
If Antonetti comes to Seattle, I will shower him with the same love that I shower Ruskell with.
I read this as "if Antonetti comes to Seattle, I will shower with him"
I'd do that too.
You and Robert should have a gay-off
Robert would beat me.

His love for Timmay knows no bounds.

Time Ruskell is the only person that I pick up my phone for when I'm around Felix.
For whom is he going to play in the ASG?

Or isn’t he nominated? I don’t know, are the nominations already published?

If a Triunfel in the forest and nobody heard it, does it still make a sound?
Whoa. Slowey down there.
I hates puns
BRB gotta get some Raben noodles.
I prefer udon noodles.
Put a Liddy on it.
You're just plain wrong

Mi Goreng is the best

Accardon't
PUNS ARE BEING KILLED
NOW WHAT WILL I USE TO COMPLEMENT MY SHOPS
Actual wit and humor?
Fuck you, not all of us are that lucky
Your faggot movies
Oh no.
Admit it, you're upset too
I knOsoria
Damn you

puns are important

*LaPortant
You're dead to me, can opener
*Cano pener
You are now forbidden from participating
If I were a mod you would all be banned
And turn yourself into the new Rincewind?
Step away from the Lidge man,
Yeah, stop being such a Valderrama queen
You're all Fossum me to go insane
Why don't you just go walk the Polanco already
I'll just tell jokes instead

A man walks into Aybar…

he asks the bartender, Izturis pay phone in here?
yeah but it'll Coste ya.
What's it Werth to you?
A Hanson amount.
Rusty Kuntz

Wait, I did it wrong.

Name your Price
Puns don't work when the name is the word
I'm working up to a decent one
50 Schillings?
Hey, why the Longoria face?
And the Bartender says...

IZturIS! It’s over there…

Ah, puns.

After all, isn’t there a little Uter in all of us? In fact, you might say we just ate Uter and he’s in our stomachs right now!

Linky

That isn't loading for me but I'm going to pretend it wasn't someone beating me to the same pun
this game is awesome

I've got a feeling Bedard is going to land on the DL after this game.
Scratched from his start this week.

Might as well.

Twisted Uterus....

Prognosis to follow after an MRI.

Bedard has female organs jokes.

Oh how wonderfully original.

This is new and clever. Implying that he's a woman like that. Fresh.
Late.
Worth repeating.
Like the fact that Bedard has no testicles!
After this game they almost have to.
They need to send somebody down later the week anyway

So they can switch some guys already now.

Ichiro, powerswing please.
Houston and Atlanta are toe to toe with us

Also in the 13th.

And McCann just hackeysacked a foul tip to catch it.

It was great.

Two kids in the front row were playing rock paper scissors
I saw that; it was amazing
I play rock paper scissors through text messages
We will win in this inning
Nice call idiot

No wonder you arent allowed to vote

Well that was just a dumb thing to say
Whats our help win % right now
The better question is what will it be after the inevitable bunt?
Goddamn it.
Horrible luck there...

everything about that lined up perfectly to get Ichiro.

Fastball….
Letter High…
Perfect Throw…

Nothing you can do about that.

END! END DAMMIT END!
I hope this goes on forever
He estado pidiendo uno de estos juegos todo el año
Seria estupendo si el juego no termine
Para el turno

siguiente todo que digo será dicha en español

Pensé que Caberra fue supuesto para ser una grasa
babelfish?
Por supuesto

No puedo decir una sola cosa en español

Que Lastima!

Tomaste el frances?

Estoy muy triste que no participe en este hilo.
Who is pitching now?
Jiminez is still out there?

Was he a starter in AAA?

Si Jeff era elegante

Él practicaría con esto antes de su viaje siguiente hasta Seattle.

You bitch
En lugar Felix bebe su corona silenciosamente
Instead Felix drinks your crown silently?

My Spanish is rusty

Estoy hablando de la cerveza
This is a bad sentence
Se retarda Babelfish
I wish I were better at Spanish
The will to win is alive and strong with the all mighty Mariners.
Sean Green just told a joke.

How adorable.

Did it go like this?

Sean Green: My arm hurts.
Stottlemyer: hahahaha, you’re such a cut up Sean.
Sean: //whimper

Placido Polanco =

Mind-bottling
It is impressive...

that his brain is so large that his skull can’t even contain it.

He makes Bonds' hat size jealous.
Here's where we lose.
All losses are really just Strasburg victories.
There's no way we can keep up with the Nationals
You can't give up hope just because it's hopeless!
I have this horrible fear that we really are a middling .500 team.
Íbamos a progresar eventual

Esto hace que quiere escoger la fruta para el salario mínimo abajo

fucking stop
That would be a popular train station
You heard it from me first
Solamente un medio turno a ir
Fijaré en paint.jpg para el turno del fifthteen si lo hacemos
hay is is vitor artinez
Yeah, stopping by this game thread was a mistake.
Welcome to my nightmare
El círculo íntimo parece estar más bién un diagrama del vene
The intimate circle seems to be rather a diagram of vene
¿Círculo gay grande?
Great circle gay?
Siente como él
Never mind; I am no longer sad I was not here.
For some reason the girls have never liked hot guy on guy action.
Grahams not hot
You know I mean "guy on guy action this is hot"
I was referring to the espanol.

But no, guy-on-guy not so hot…not usually anyway.

My spanish was never good unless I was referring to shoestores or shoplifting items from Shopko.
You need to add cerveza and bano to your vocab.

That’s really all you need.

Way ahead of you an bano

“Cuando me bano yo toco los tambores.”

That line got me an A.

Yes, my teacher was awesome.

I see your Spanish sentence contruction is about on par with your English.
I'm sure the original made more sense, it's been mucho anos.
Plural adjective goes with plural noun
Éste es cómo los retruécanos molestos están a la gente normal
So this Cesar guy seems pretty decent.
Things say in Rome!

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiyooooooooooo!

fail....
I dunno.

I kinda thought it was funny.

The concept...yes...

The execution….not good.

Should I be angry I decided to watch season three of Arrested Development rather than the game?

Has it been a fun 14 innings?

What a stupid thing to do
MAKE THE SHITTY PUNNING STOP
This is what you get
It's just so awful, and not in a good way
Uno más fuera de este infierno
One more outside this hell
Veo que el babelfish es terrible en su trabajo
Hello inning number 15.
Needs more fucking Clement
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
CLEMENT

CLEMENT NOW!

dahahahahahaha
Que occurio?
Retroceda

Éste es mi meme

Ruled a double.

Example 431,231,877 why errors are stupid.

But how will you calculate Earned Runs?
GODDAMNIT RIGGLEMAN YOU'RE FUCKING AWFUL WHY THE HELL IS BURKE HITTING
WTF...how does Clement not hit now..fuck this shit
They called that a double

Fuck you Willie.

LEVANTATE GET UP
first word of spanish I was taught.
Fuck off and die Mariners
GODDAMN IT I HATE YOU RIGGLEMAN GO TO HELL
He has left an impression on me during his brief tenure as manager.

It’s not a favorable one.

Have you guys ever liked anybody though?
Piniella.

Melvin aside from the pitch counts.

Piniella had much better teams than everybody else though.
Beside the point. He was good at managing.
Based on what?

When he had crappy teams (see-Devil Rays) they stayed crappy. And his bullpen management was particularly great. How long was Bobby Ayala closer for?

*wasn't particularly great, rather.
I don't have time to go into this.

But he was good. No manager does everything how we’d like, but he did more better than most.

Okay.

I’ll take your word for it.

I don't have time to go into this.

But he was good. No manager does everything how we’d like, but he did more better than most.

Not a double anymore.

E7

I'm so motherfucking sick of white people

bunch a fuckin cracka ass racists

Drive 15 minutes south.
But I got you Utah Jazz season tickets for your birthday

:(

SHUT THE FUCK UP COMCAST FIOS IS STILL BETTER THAN YOUR SHITTY SERVICE
JAMIE BURKE PITCHING!

GAME OVER!

FUCK YES!!!!!!!
hahahahahaha

awesome!

This is Clement didn't pinch hit!!!!!!!!

WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

I am so in favor of this.
Sexson 0-6

FUNKY

RIGGELMAN REDEEMS HIMSELF
This game is taking forever...
Tienes ser hacer chistes
I enjoy burritos.
OMG THIS IS AWESOME
I crave this PITCHf/x data
Getting squeezed!
This is, for lack of better words, fucking ridiculous
Don't care, is awesome
Boy it's sad that Jamie Burke is going to be the biggest suckfest when this is all over.
84?

Holy hell.

That is total BP tossing..haha
Oh well.....

it means I get to go mow the lawn finally.

Jamie!

I’m so glad I stayed up for this one

Burke pitching

Oh wow.

JESUS CHRIST I'M HAPPY
Lieber alone

She’s been passed out on Hrbek for Sowers.

That

was a Gooden.

Throwing in the towel in a ridiculously amazing way
Why the fuck didn't Clement not hit?

Ditched the DH anyway.

What is Burke shaking off?

He has more than one pitch?

Clearly not.
I laughed when I saw that
He's just scared
Was that a curveball!?
He threw a curve!
Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
dahahahahahahaha
I love baseball.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
please strike out Pudge
This is one Strasburg of a decision
Burke for rotation?
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Someone should be Lofton a home run here soon
SWINGING K!
strike*

That’s gotta be embarrassing

I love it, I get back from softball

Burke is on the mound… at first I thought perhpas we called up some pitcher named Burke…

50% groundout ratio!
Take notes Felix
Rhodes seems pissed
Bedard was laughing
Burke needs to spot-start for Bedard next week
BUUUUURRKKEEEEEE!
REMEMBER THE ALOMAR

I’ve been drinking, a little. On the clock!

You know, without the wild pitch, that's a scoreless inning.
Which would have been even more hilarious.

Especially to see if he went out there for a second frame.

Gaining velocity
what was his fastball at?

I didn’t catch it.

85 the fastest
topped at 85
That was awesome...pure awesome
haha this is so random
Hahaha this game was totally worth it.
someone please gif the wild pitch
That was my favorite out in my entire tenure as a Mariner fan.
Outrageously awesome.

I wonder if this is their solution to getting Jamie more playing time.

Burke just killed USSM.
That was my favorite out in my entire tenure as a Mariner fan.
I can't believe I double posted.

That is fucking embarrassing.

Man

I am anticipating this write up so much

So, no Reed?

Clearly Riggleman wants to go home.

He pinch-ran already
That's right.
Reed already played. PR for Johjima
Get two runs now

Burke, W

Man I hope Ichiro homers or something

to give Burke the win.

Nevermind.

Yuni ruined my dream.

Burke for reliever
If they score a run...

Do they stick with Burke for the 16th?

Should've had Ichiro pitch
God damn you server
Yuni go back to Canada
Burke should walk over and punch Yuni in his silly monkey face
If Ichiro pitched I would die happy.
The hell? Why not bunt there to get RISP for Ichiro, who would get IBBed to bring up Lopez and Ibanez with chances?
So Ichiro hasn't homered in a while
Fuck the Mariners
Why did that raft Yuni was on have to make it here...damn him.
100 PA's without ebh?
Bah.

Oh well, at least Burke made it fun.

I'm blaming this solely on Jeff Clement
Fuck Yuniesky Betancourt.

Seriously, Jesus Christ how can you ever swing at the first pitch from a guy who only throws suck pitches?

Because all his pitches are hittable?
This is true..but Yuni sucks donkey balls.
And many are out of the zone
The one he swung at was not
I heard it and didn't see it.

It was Yuni so I assumed.

Bad job me

Not the one that hit Bloomy.
Yeah..Yuni can go Cory Lidle himself.
And the guy with the two homers yesterday was only allowed to catch the 15th.
And Burke gets the loss....

ugh.

Thank god thats over

I only had ideas for 2 more innings

So wait why didn't they just use Dickey anyway?
Hush sweetums the Mariners just don't care
They finally started listening to us
Has to start soon...?
Gayass Bedard didn't even bother to volunteer himself
Especially if my Bedard to DL theory becomes true.
I swear Yuniesky Betancourt has to be the stupidest player alive.
He always reminds me of 05 Beltre
Travis Hafner sounds less than sharp in his little "Keep Watching" cameo
Ahahahaha Logie's accusing Ichiro of being selfish because Burke pitched instead of him.
Jamie Burke has officially overtaken John Mabry as my favorite player ever
This

But only if you have a separate divisions for good and bad players

Fair enough
well, we now know that Burke is better than Dontrelle Willis
Want to be more angry?

Watch the Yankees/Boston game on ESPN WITH THE SOUND ON.

Simple groundball (with Crisp not running out of the box because he didn’t know where it went) to Jeter and the douchebag lauds the great play he just made!

Oh, and Joba is pitching…fuck this.

Your .gifs of the day:

Felix has some nifty shades.

He has better taste in that than cars at least.

I used to have those shades and then I lost them =(
FUCK BEES

WHAT THE FUCK IS THE EVOLUTIONARY BENEFIT OF BEING ABLE TO STING AFTER YOU’RE DEAD

Maybe they're like the Sammael creatures in Hellboy

If they sting you when they die, the stinger can deposit eggs into your skin that will hatch as soon as another bee is killed.

I DON'T WANT THIS TO HAPPEN
Spiders do this
I thought they just lay their eggs in your mouth while you sleep
HAHA..happened to me too when I was younger.
I have never been stung before
MY FOOT IS GRADUALLY GOING NUMB
You might want to get that looked at.
I'm actually kind of enjoying this now
Poking it with pencils?
Having one foot that works
How much longer till you get hired by Princeton Plainsbourgh?
I should start fighting the numbness with an addiction
Have you heard of the new wonder drug? I believe it's called Placebo
What does it cure
You so stole this from an episode of the Dilbert TV series.
You caught me

I loved that show

I did, too.

Shame it was picked up by UPN. It would have lived longer on another network.

That was the worst network for it
That was the worst network for anything.

UPN was a sitcom graveyard.

Dilbert was awesome.
I wish Pez addictions were cool

Cause they are so tasty.

They can be cool if you're creative about it
Swallow 'em dry.
Fuck that

I’m going start free basing them in bathroom stalls

Chop them up and snort them
Why chop them up?

Go straight for Pixie Stix.

Take about 50 miligrams of Benadryl.
This man sounds like he is a doctor

Listen to him

Nope, but I'm allergic to bees.

If you are allergic and don’t have an epi-pen, that’s the best thing to do.

When I was younger, my doctor made me carry an Epi everywhere.
I thought your MC was a MD
Only a BA.

MC are just initials – I can’t rap either.

I missed Burke pitching? Damn.
He gave up a wild pitch

but that was overshadowed by him getting Pudge to swing and miss at a “fastball.”

What in the flying fuck?
I kinda regret zoning out the Mariners this weekend
I only watch in hopes of seeing something awesome/crazy

ala Felix grand slam or Burke pitching.

Believe it or not I actually love watching baseball games

Its just that this team is so boring that I can’t help but go off topic.

Boring teams spawn off-topic discussion.

For entertaining baseball, I watch the Rays.

I am in the same boat as you
No you aren't
Evidence to the contrary:

A) Why is Corco in the dark while Robert is getting a tan?

B) Who the fuck gave their baby to Corco?

I don't know the answers, I was just hiding in the bushes
Queerly a fake

I’m not strong enough to paddle a boat.

The guy behind you is paddling the boat
I appear to be completely useless in this scenario
At least you've got a nice rack
Go figure
You look like a fish
He's sitting in my gigantic shadow
I'm good with kids :(
You need to photoshop Corco into a German car that is powered by minced American flags.
Would you flag that one?
depends on the quality
We weren't even out of fucking pitchers.
Rhodes and Morrow were apparently unavailable.

With Bedard likely to miss a start, Dickey was most likely unavailable too.

So what's up with Baker lately?

It seems like he’s hardly covering the team.

So Matthew and Graham are no longer overlords...

Jeff wants all the glory.

WTF are you talking about?
Maybe it's just my computer,

but on the bottom of the page under “Overlords” there are only Gomez, Jeff, and Devin.

I’d screenshot it but I’m not sure how.

Doesn't say that for me and I still have all my admin functions, so I think it's a goof on your comp.
Oh.

Carry on then.

Why aren't there any goofs like that for me.
Interesting.

In FF it shows all of you, but in IE it doesn’t show you and Graham.

alt+prt scr
Doesn't work...

):<

Just hit prt scr

Then right click and paste

Yeah but for whatever reason my prnt scrn button isn't working.

Oh well

Five-game lead for the Rays
Cinderella's slipper still fits.
What interests me more in the standings is the fact that the Giants are just 5 games back of Arizona.

Some small demented part of me wants them to not only win the division, but to ride that Cain and Lincecum to a World Series title. Because how hilarious would that be?

Slightly less funny than having Barry Zito lose the World Series for them

when he walks in the winning (Ray) run.

JEFF

They have Dogfish Head 90-Minute at the BevMo in Mission Valley. There were two four-packs, and I left one for you. It’s hiding on the back of the shelf.

I've heard but yet to confirm that they also have it at Costplus.

There’s locations all over, I’m going to try the Temecula and Escondido ones as soon as I get back from Seattle

Costplus in Seattle stocks it.
You are the greatest.

I may be making a pit stop on my way home tomorrow…

And Toronado finally has a sign up.
Still thinking about Friday, will keep you informed
I'm in. Jen's family's in town, and I need an out.

So yeah, even if you don’t go, I’m there.

You must Login with your SB Nation account and be a member of Lookout Landing to post a comment.