Ichiro has yet to step on even a practice field let alone see game action since he left Monday’s game against the Brewers after his second at bat complaining of light headedness.
Considering that he has had limited time with his team following the WBC, this is starting to feel a little strange. No doubt Ichiro can jump in Opening Day and be Ichiro, but still, three days away is concerning.
When asked about the situation before today’s game Wak replied,
“Ichiro, well still experiencing fatigue so we will have him checked out by the doctors today and should know more later this afternoon.”
“It is most likely Ichiro after an off season of preparation, the travel and WBC has finally hit the wall. I am pretty sure he has never even seen the wall before, but even Ichiro has limits.”
Ah, but see, when it becomes a wall, it ceases being a floor.
It’s inherent property, that of providing support against the force of gravity on a horizontal plane, has ceased to be and thus it revokes its symbolism as a floor and instead embraces its new role, that of support against the force of gravity on a vertical plane!
Aye, but if it was previously a floor, then one would note that it did not exist.
That which does not exist cannot embrace a new role, as embracing is an act which hinges on the property of existence. Thus, to say the floor embraced it’s new role would be to say that it did exist previous to being a wall, which is the pinnacle of haberdashery!
There are floors in existence obviously, otherwise, what are we all standing upon? They just do not happen to currently exist in the realm of the Mariners. That is why Ichiro, being the quiet and self-sacrificing soul that he is, has brought forth a wall with which to run into. Soon, the momentum for the collision with Ichiro will topple the wall over, and it will become: a floor!
Ichiro has brought us what will soon be our floor.
“The scenario that is now developing: The Rangers could keep Jones as a right-handed designated hitter to give them better balance against left-handed starting pitchers. Doing so, however, would probably cut into the playing time of both DH Hank Blalock and 1B Chris Davis and it would almost certainly mean the release of left-handed pinch-hitting specialist Frank Catalanotto. The Rangers owe Catalanotto $6 million in salary and buy-out clauses, but his role on the club had been greatly reduced even before the Jones situation arose.”
So Ichiro's been out of the lineups for a few days now unless I've missed a minor league game or something
no? Any word on what the deal is? I think the last I’d heard about him he was leaving a game feeling light headed.
Bearskin Rugburn - April 2, 2009
Supposedly just getting rest
if that is all it then I’m fine. He’s gonna play 150+ games this year, no reason for him to play in meaningless ST games.
bluemax - April 2, 2009
.
Shannon weighs in.
kevin_ess - April 2, 2009
It's a tumor
Kermit. - April 2, 2009
It could be auto immune.
bluemax - April 2, 2009
I like this line:
“It is most likely Ichiro after an off season of preparation, the travel and WBC has finally hit the wall. I am pretty sure he has never even seen the wall before, but even Ichiro has limits.”
msb - April 2, 2009
Walls are just sideways floors.
Matthew - April 2, 2009
That's cheerful.
royalcurve - April 2, 2009
In this specific case, Ichiro demonstrates how there is no floor by running into a sideways floor.
How very Ichiro of him.
Matthew - April 2, 2009
He can't do anything just regular, can he.
royalcurve - April 2, 2009
Regular is boring.
joof - April 2, 2009
I agree.
royalcurve - April 2, 2009
As there is no floor, wouldn't it then follow that there is no wall?
joof - April 2, 2009
All walls are floors.
see?
msb - April 2, 2009
Ah, but see, when it becomes a wall, it ceases being a floor.
It’s inherent property, that of providing support against the force of gravity on a horizontal plane, has ceased to be and thus it revokes its symbolism as a floor and instead embraces its new role, that of support against the force of gravity on a vertical plane!
Ichiro is very into existentialism.
Matthew - April 2, 2009
Aye, but if it was previously a floor, then one would note that it did not exist.
That which does not exist cannot embrace a new role, as embracing is an act which hinges on the property of existence. Thus, to say the floor embraced it’s new role would be to say that it did exist previous to being a wall, which is the pinnacle of haberdashery!
joof - April 2, 2009
Other teams have floors though.
There are floors in existence obviously, otherwise, what are we all standing upon? They just do not happen to currently exist in the realm of the Mariners. That is why Ichiro, being the quiet and self-sacrificing soul that he is, has brought forth a wall with which to run into. Soon, the momentum for the collision with Ichiro will topple the wall over, and it will become: a floor!
Ichiro has brought us what will soon be our floor.
Praise be he.
Matthew - April 2, 2009
Praise to Ichiro, the floor bringer!
So say we all!
joof - April 2, 2009
So say we all.
Matthew - April 2, 2009
Perhaps the entity existed in a stable transition state as both a floor and a wall previous to intervention
Schrodinger’s floor?
Jeff Sullivan - April 2, 2009
That would imply that Ichiro has chosen for it to materialize as a wall and not as a floor
with which we might all have been spared. This man decries Ichiro! Burn the heretic!
Matthew - April 2, 2009
Can we tie him to a tree?
Two birds!
Aaron Campeau - April 2, 2009
Perhaps the outcome was beyond the scope of Ichiro's control
and the wall shall soon be topped regardless.
Jeff Sullivan - April 2, 2009
You insinuate that there is a limit to Ichiro's power?
Matthew - April 2, 2009
Is this one of those subthreads only insanely smart people get?
Aaron Campeau - April 2, 2009
THERES A GAME GOING ON JEEZ
JI - April 2, 2009
We're reenacting yesterday's Jerry Springer show.
Matthew - April 2, 2009
How the fuck did Steve the Security Guy get his own show?
Seriously, what the fuck?
Aaron Campeau - April 2, 2009
I don't know what I'm talking about
Jeff Sullivan - April 2, 2009
That does nothing to answer Aaron's question.
Matthew - April 2, 2009
Suck off a horse
Jeff Sullivan - April 2, 2009
I imagine that the extent of Ichiro's power stops short of quantum determinism
Jeff Sullivan - April 2, 2009
Its
Jeff Sullivan - April 2, 2009
How very zen.
joof - April 2, 2009
.
PI.com
kevin_ess - April 2, 2009
LATE
and to yourself amazingly.
Matthew - April 2, 2009
I was just saying it was in the papers, not just from Shannon's keyboard.
kevin_ess - April 2, 2009
Drayer is more reliable than the papers.
Matthew - April 2, 2009
Well, I'll agree with that.
kevin_ess - April 2, 2009
What was it Bobby Engram was diagnosed with a few years ago?
Wouldn’t it be just swell if Ichiro had that?
BrianL - April 2, 2009
BTW
Niehaus made it sound official that Rob Johnson is the back up. Didn’t say what will happen to Burke.
bluemax - April 2, 2009
ROOGY
abender20 - April 2, 2009
Only in our dreams.
If he was a lefty, he’d totally be coming out of the pen.
James F'n X - April 2, 2009
This makes sense though.
Why not carry the younger guy on the roster.
Thingray - April 2, 2009
Hee heee bunts
Kermit. - April 2, 2009
I hope Ichiro brings back the slap bunt, just because.
Kermit. - April 2, 2009
Well that's not a bunt
Kermit. - April 2, 2009
Is this game on the radio?
Thingray - April 2, 2009
Seems like it.
I’ve got KIRO audio on MLB.com
bluemax - April 2, 2009
I wish I didn't have a gag response to Silva starts.
royalcurve - April 2, 2009
No puns
Kermit. - April 2, 2009
None intended. I usually don't intend them.
royalcurve - April 2, 2009
I fully supported your statement, I have no explanation why I chose to tag it with that comment.
Kermit. - April 2, 2009
It's that sort of day, isn't it.
royalcurve - April 2, 2009
: (
Like you said, like living inside a wool sock. That was instantly added to my repertoire by the way.
Kermit. - April 2, 2009
Fuck Endy Chavez
JI - April 2, 2009
Not on your good side, is he?
royalcurve - April 2, 2009
What would he have to do for you to get over that?
Aaron Campeau - April 2, 2009
Do it for us?
JI - April 2, 2009
Hey maybe Griffey won't totally blow after all?
EnglishMariner - April 2, 2009
YUNI WALKED.
EnglishMariner - April 2, 2009
Well he sure as hell doesn't have much interest in running anymore.
Too tiring.
Matthew - April 2, 2009
Hmm, Snelling in right field.
joof - April 2, 2009
Sigh.
msb - April 2, 2009
awwwww.
I miss Cammie.
msb - April 2, 2009
quick, someone trade their uniforms.
Matthew - April 2, 2009
Well all do, msb.
We all do. :(
Aaron Campeau - April 2, 2009
I miss him smashing Carlos Beltran's face.
abender20 - April 2, 2009
In a blog full of Mike Cameron fans it's probably not the best idea to list this as something to be missed.
pdb - April 2, 2009
Oh I miss Cammie.
abender20 - April 2, 2009
It was the other way aroudn >:(
BrianL - April 2, 2009
Around*
BrianL - April 2, 2009
Me too
My favorite player ever. And a hell of a player too. Bavasi letting him go without offering arbitration was a crime against humanity.
Decatur - April 2, 2009
It's TRI un fel, Rick. Not TRU in fel. Jesus.
kevin_ess - April 2, 2009
It's preseason, he's probably had a few
pdb - April 2, 2009
Ha!
our minor leaguers can beat your minor leaguers.
the Rangers cut Catalanotto to keep Andruw?
msb - April 2, 2009
Just heard that...
kevin_ess - April 2, 2009
per Evan Grant
“The scenario that is now developing: The Rangers could keep Jones as a right-handed designated hitter to give them better balance against left-handed starting pitchers. Doing so, however, would probably cut into the playing time of both DH Hank Blalock and 1B Chris Davis and it would almost certainly mean the release of left-handed pinch-hitting specialist Frank Catalanotto. The Rangers owe Catalanotto $6 million in salary and buy-out clauses, but his role on the club had been greatly reduced even before the Jones situation arose.”
msb - April 2, 2009
Random question
If you learned something bizarre/weird about a new coworker, from a television program, what would you do with the information?
This isn’t a hypothetical question either.
bluemax - April 2, 2009
If it gets them fired, is there a promotion for you involved?
Kermit. - April 2, 2009
Nah
it’s not gonna get them fired and there wouldn’t be a promotion for me.
bluemax - April 2, 2009
I'd loop it on a tape in the break room.
Only if it’s funny
Kermit. - April 2, 2009
You work with The Bachelor?
msb - April 2, 2009
How bizarre/wierd?
joof - April 2, 2009
I dunno
how bizarre is marrying your first cousin?
bluemax - April 2, 2009
This just screams "do nothing"
seriously, what good could come of “doing anything” with that information?
pdb - April 2, 2009
That's what I was thinking
I actually wish I didn’t find it out.
bluemax - April 2, 2009
See, you guys wouldn't cut it as commercial divers.
This type of information is solid gold.
Kermit. - April 2, 2009
interesting
msb - April 2, 2009
Huh well
I guess I just hope like most information I lose this from my brain in a few days.
bluemax - April 2, 2009
Marrying a step-sister might not cause any genetic problems either
but there’s more to familial relationships than blood. Still weird.
Aaron Campeau - April 2, 2009
well, it's not illegal. In most places.
and it’s not unheard of.
msb - April 2, 2009
It's illegal in some states, including Washington
List
Ezzra - April 2, 2009
Is she hot?
Graham MacAree - April 2, 2009
bone her?
Matthew - April 2, 2009
My coworkers are overwhelmingly male.
bluemax - April 2, 2009
Yeah, but is the first cousin hot?
joof - April 2, 2009
It's not bizarre if your coworker is from Shelbyville.
Jed MC - April 2, 2009
So Prentice Redman is still hanging around, didn't see that coming.
Kermit. - April 2, 2009
So, what are the odds they can carry this offense into the Metrodome?
msb - April 2, 2009
oh, wait, Vegas first.
Friday: Mostly sunny, with a high near 68. Windy, with a west northwest wind between 22 and 32 mph, with gusts as high as 48 mph.
Saturday: Sunny, with a high near 65. Northeast wind between 8 and 17 mph, with gusts as high as 25 mph.
msb - April 2, 2009
They're talking about Strasburg now...
Slurvey - April 2, 2009
I didn't expect this score.
ThundaPC - April 2, 2009
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