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Lookout Landing

4/29: Open Game Thread, Part 3

This seems ominous.

Post-7th inning update: Yep.

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Comments

Was Beltre not clearly safe on that steal attempt?
Apparently the bag was blocked
I thought he was out.
he was clearly illegally blocked.
Beltre would've been safe if Ramirez hadn't been blocking the base.

That was a pretty good play by Ramirez – Beltre had no way to even touch the base there.

Isn't that illegal?

I know you can do it at home, but I’m pretty sure the other bases are not allowed to be blocked.

I'm not really sure about that.

It’s been 2 years since I’ve read the rulebook all the way through – maybe I’ll go check now.

SIT THE FUCK DOWN YOU HICK.
FUCKING SIT YOUR SHIT DOWN BITCH

NEW YEAR, SAME OLD SUCK

I can't believe the calls these announcers are making.

“Quentin would like nothing more than to untie this ballgame.”

Suck dick.

Thanks for making note of this.

Can I blame you now?

I bet he'd rather have world peace

Can we offer him that to take it back?

I doubt it.

Diplomats don’t get paid as much. He’s probably happy with his career choice.

AND FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK
Yep. Boned.
Fuck you Quentin

I’m out

That's the game
well fucknuts
SHIT BURGERS
no fuck no fuck no fuck
AWESOME

FUCKING FANTASTICLY AWESOME

3-1 TO 3-4 NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
That one was coming from a mile away.
Well that's it
TRY PLAYING IN A REAL STADIUM WHITE SOX
NOT EVEN THAT BAD OF A PITCH
Quentin's gonna get his.

At least it wasn’t Lillibridge or Anderson orsomething.

WOW I NOW KNOW WHY PEOPLE COMMIT SUICIDE BOMBINGS

PEOPLE LIKE HAWK HARRELLSON

What a great way to start off the thread

Any newbies today will be putting the "delicate sensibilities’ waiver to use

HAWK YOU CAN DRINK MY DIARRHEA
Moose muffins.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
FUCKING BAND BOX
DIE DYE DIE
No one who speaks German could be an evil man.
Well that was fun
Ohhhh God.

Well that’s it for me.

ITS A DOUBLE TEABAG
Fuck it... later
WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Yep, fuck this game.
ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL ABOARD
I'm going to kill myself

Give me a second.

5-6 in our last 11 games
This is an awful way to not be working.
Wow okay I'm gonna get off the computer and go hang myself
Thanks for reminding me why I hate Chicago sports, WGN.

God these announcers are fucking awful.

This stadium is such a joke.
what
Kelley's FB still looks like shit

His slider was death but he either didn’t throw it at all or didn’t throw any fastballs to keep hitters off balance

HEY COOL ... A TOTAL DISASTER
Following up that inning with a Match 4's commercial

is just adding lemon juice to the wound.

Maybe they'll show a mini sirloin burger commercial next
I hate both those damn commericals!
seriously, what
THIS GAME IS WORSE THAN AVIAN FLU + SWINE FLU COMBINED.
Get rid of all the Asians and the Mexicans?

Who would be left to play baseball… The Canucks?

Well, until all the pitchers get injured.
Or get converted to releivers
If you add a little human flu, and a Texas infant

you’d be dead.

Or Mad Cow Disease

That’s a good UK-centric outbreak

WE WERE CURSING UNTIL YUSELESS RUN US OUT OF THE INNING,
I trust you mean cruising

And that we’ve been cursing since then

I HAVE CURSING ON THE MIND.
And knocking Yuni's fucking monkey head clean off?
I LIKE YOUR SIG
I like where it came from!
The heartfelt sentiment overwhelmed me
ITS ALL YUNI'S FAULT
Clearly bad positioning.

He should be in the bleachers.

Maybe we should do that.

Since our OF defense is so good we could just stick Endy in the stands when Washburn or Silva starts.

This is such fucking stupid shit
Yuniesky Betancourt is the Mariners' starting shortstop. FML.
Throw more strikes you pig fuckers
SWINE FLUCKERS!
I'd say this team's start has been fairly flukey.
M's are gonna brew a late inning rally.
And stick our balls in the blender
STOP SHAKING THE BABY
DOES WEARING THE RETRO UNIFORMS MEAN THAT WE DON'T HAVE TO USE OUR BLACK PLAYERS?

AND THUS YUNI CAN’T PLAY?

He's Cuban
You mean he's monkey.
Nope
Isn't he a Cunab?
Back in the day you were white or you were black

There wasn’t a distinction, just ask David Allen Coe

He'd fail the paper bag test.
Pyerzinski reminds me of Lars Ulrich
He's possibly my second least favorite player in the majors.
Ditto

I wish both painful deaths

I wanna comeback to win this for no other reason to here these announcers cry.
AJ, seriously. I sincerely hate you.
Have you heard about

My hatred of AJ Pierzynski? Ask me!

You hate AJ?
AJ's mother hates AJ.
I hate him more

Than earthquakes and ebola combined…

Oh yeah well I hate AJ more than all y'alls!

2005 ALCS….fucker.

Yeah, but that was funny.
Good thing AJ is slower than dirt.
Don't bring dirt's good name into this...
Fucking christ get an out
This is retarded
That's an insult to retardation.
I kind of feel like I need to take a walk of shame

And get away from this game before the TV wakes up and realizes I’m gone

Stop hitting the fucking ball.
White Sox offense: Needs more Yuni
They seem to like their Cuban shortstop.
This must be one of those regression to the mean games.
Regresssion...

… thy name is Mariner

How about our motherfucking home runs regress to the mean

Fuck

THE LAST HOUR HAS BEEN WORSE THAN THAT TIME I SNAPPED MY BANJO STRING.
I wish we sucked less donkey penis
Me too JI, me too.
My lips are tired. Can I be shot now?
You have other holes for the donkey penis to violate
All the world is a stage and I'm working a donkey show in tejana.
Charming in the face of this game? Impressive.
I try. I try because I care.
ALL ABOARD THE UNWELCOME-FUCK WAGON
Anderson looks as po'dunk bland as JI

JIM THOME

Injury delay?
Yep

Sounds like a hip flexor

Anderson hip flexor, it would seem.
All for offering a bounty for severing Hawk's vocal cords?
I have 17 cents.
I can't stand to listen to this fucker anymore.
who is injured?
One of the bad guys
Brian Anderson

Their CF

LETS GET THOSE RUNS BACK
JI, once a run is scored it cannot be unscored.

This is basic baseball.

YOU READ THE SCORE DIFFERENTLY THAN I

CURRENTLY I READ IT AS “-2”

Longest. Bullshit. Ever.
Thank god thats over
Well my laptops about to die - I'll be home in like an hour to check the results

God I hope we rally

WE ARE ONLY TWO RUNS BEHIND WE CAN STILL WIN WE HAVE A 2% SHOT
14%.

Probably a bit lower with Linebrink/Jenks/The Ministry in the equation.

Yeah I factored in the Mariner Equation.
C'mon you real world grown up edition of the Bad News Bears score some fucking runs.
This is a clever Bedard = girl joke.
I just realized that if this were true Bedard would in fact be a girl.
I am late.
In that case

Aardsma’s going to keep pumping the fastball.

This is what it feels like to not be on a boat.
Fucking mafia.
The splashing? The gurgling? The flailing?
Having a mermaid punch you in the cock.

That about covers it.

That kid stole Sims' hat
Fuck Scott Linebrink
Linebrink sounds like an ASCII control code
Alright, rally time.
HIT THE DAMN BALL BALENTIEN

GRAHHHHHHHHH

Come on Wlad.
Straight fastballs.

HIT IT

Well, he swung at least.
I like it that Gameday now refuses to tell me what the pitches are.
Are they just not picking it up? Seemed dodgy yesterday too.
And also that the strike zone is no longer displayed.
I feel like that comes and goes.
I was wondering if that was just me...
OH GREAT, ROB JOHNSON
HIT THE BALL WLAD

HIT THE BALL

dfksjhsdjkhgjkdsflghsdfklj

AAAAAAAAAAHHHHH

Going to vomit

Fuck. Wow. FUCK

HIT IT ROBBY

HIT A HOMERUN HIT ONE HIT ONE

I wanna molest the White Sox.
I thought that was what most teenage boys did.
Most 13-year-old boys are probably in the same boat.
god wlad pisses me off.

hes fallen behind all day. fuck the rest of the m’s too. jesus christ on a stick.

Let's see Rob Johnson hit a homer to start an improbable comeback :o
More likely he turns into a ball of yarn.
At least he'd be useful in that case.
And I would like to see a cat bat him around with its claws.
Like maybe a mountain lion.
I keep making ugly faces while watching Gameday.

In turn my prof is giving me funny looks

Awwww

I get back from a meeting to this shit?

Come on, it's the Mariners.

What do you expect?

Precisely this shit
More pop rocks

Less pop ups

Rob Johnson is both ugly and bad at his job.
This game is a pimple.
A pimple ... on your ass.
A pimple ... on the inside of your ear/
That's actually herpes

From getting ear fucked by the White Sox

Leave my ass out of it, Gareth.
First name treatment

Must have struck a nerve

Heh no, I just like his name.
Fun to pop?
fuck this i'm out

besides the felix game, the m’s have played like retards.

FREE JEFF CLEMENT
Hooray!

Tying run to the plate!

If Yuni hits a home run, will you all be nice during the off day?

Deal?

No

I’m willing to sacrifice this AB if it gets him his rightful spot on the bench. He has no business still playing in this game.

You know I can't answer without lying
I think you're nice anyway.
Come onnnnnnn YUNIBOMBER
OK MONKEY DO SOMETHING YUSEFUL
too bad

he’ll swing like a little bitch and get himself out. aargh.

Yuni-BOMB.

Yeah right.

Time for a popup!
I'd compliment your guess...

but it really was too easy.

I'd like to score one this inning.

Of course, I’d love for two or three, but I’d settle for one to make the 9th potentially interesting.

If Yuni ties the game, I will refrain from booing him until the Texas series starts.
DITTO
Bargaining is one of the stages of grief
It's a deal. Now let's make it happen!
Pube-chin is warming up.
pitch in the dirt

And Yuni doesn’t swing? DOES NOT COMPUTE

Come on monkey, 2 run homer!
NOT FAR ENOUGH ASSBAG
If you can't hit it out here

We need to trade you to Cincinnati. Or better yet, Texas, so we can play against you 18 times(ish) a season.

adslkfjhasdjklfhaskldjfhakjsdlhflkajsdhfkjlsdf
FUCK YOU YUNI! GO DIE IN A FIRE
So the Angels won.

Figured now would be a good time to bring that up.

You are trying to distract us from Yuni's failings.
Just trying to enhance the grief.
So basing your username on Yuni ... I bet whilst it seemed a good idea at the time, you'd rather have chosen 'Pujolsform' instead huh?
But what's the fun in rooting for a player/team that always succeeds?

That’s like rooting for a casino. Or death.

I'd love to root for a casino.

Especially if Yuni developed a gambling problem there and my goons got to break his fingers with a hammer.

Well this game eats butt
unless you like that type of thing or are a White Sox fan
White Sox fans and sex perverts aren't real people.
There's a difference?
Eheh....eheh.....ehehEHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA……HAHAHAA….haah…ha..hah……ha….

*sob

I dislike this game.
Ah ha a Mariners fan.
Ah ha a English Mariners fan.

And to think, you could’ve picked the Yankees or the Red Sox.

I know this feeling.
Mark Lowe needs to pretend he's not bad
The best thing about this game was the part where I convinced myself we would win, and then didn't.
Same here.
A walk? Really?
Its ok. He's just setting up the DP....
Should be a pretty neat DP.
LEADOFF MOTHERFUCKING WALKS
WHAT THE FUCK LOWE.
Fuck well we screwed the pooch in Chicago

lost two of three despite outscoring them

Evertime our pitcher walks somebody, I want to see 10 pushups.
Cause this walk crap drives me nuts.

Similar idea worked in Major League 2. When Hays wouldn’t keep the ball on the ground. He wanted to “go deep”

Whyz
STRIKES

THROW THEM

Hello Mark, I am the strike zone.

Just wanted to introduce myself should you need me at anytime.

Gameday says that two of those could have been strikes.
Gameday has no power here.
I just realized how amazingly mediocre the American League is right now

Only four teams have winning records.

And we are one of them!

WE CAN BUILD ON THIS

Haha he's getting squeezed on the sides.
MARK LOWE NEEDS TO GO TO AAA ASAP
After Lowe throws ball 3, Hawk: "Attaboy"
Ugh.
Hawk pleading "drop, drop, drop" is more annoying.
YUNI DO YOU KNOW WTF A TAG IS!?!?!?!?!?
STOLEN BASES ARE NOT FUCKING FORCE OUTS
Clutch Yuni right there.
NICE TAG ASSHOLE
I wish it wasn't finals week so I could just get wasted right now, because what the hell mariners?
Get the fucking out, you AAAA bitch.
Niehaus "It's a little bit like agony watching him work."

Understatement.

Quote of the day, that's why I still love Dave.
Stop being so bad at pitching. It's Brent Lillibridge, asshole.
No, no it's Lilliburg.
fucking finally.
Can we send in Felix in?
I can't stand this game

and I am out.

Clement can do that.
God is not a Mariners fan.
Rob Johnson you are so so so so so bad.

GO AWAY

I HAVE WASTED OVER THREE HOURS OF MY VERY LIMITED SPARE TIME ON THIS SHIT.
FREE CLEMENT

Johnson, you are a thorn in this team’s asshole.

Screw you guys, I'm going home
This sucks so bad.
I wish this game were a little bit less like waking up with a pair of sweaty hairy testicles on our collective foreheads
Yeah.....
Oh come on RC, don't be modest. I know we've all been there.
Too many times, Eyebrows. Too many times.
It's rash and illogical, but I really am just done with Mark Lowe.

Watching him last year and this year, I just have a horrible feeling he’ll never get it back.

His velocity is there, his control is just awful.
Why is that rash and illogical? The guy couldn't pick a corner if he was sitting in it.
Let's give this fat pig swine flu!
Niehaus had the voice of dread on that pop up.

I was sure it was going to be gone, especially in that stadium.

God, If we win I promise to start going back to church.
Quick outs! Sweet!
Well this was a waste of a morning/early afternoon.
First pitch Ichi? Really?
He wants Jenks' FIP to get below 4.60
Looked like a good pitch to swing at to me.
Back-to-back-to-back home runs. I'm calling it now. :o
Well I hope you enjoyed that.
Close

Back-to-back-to-back home runs strikes. I’m calling it now. :o

Well that was a pile of balls.
Shvetty balls?
Another painful loss.

How the hell are we in 1st place?

AL West sux
We're so lucky that's true.
Angels = AAA Salt Lake
So those 6 LOB in the first three innings really look a lot worse now.
Alright folks, April is over. May could be a really sweet! 140 more games to go!
I never thouht I'd be happy about this, but sweet god Kenji is back on Friday. Couldn't come soon enough
Haha if only you could have seen this comment in 2008.
I'm still not sure what to think about it.

Rob’s wOBA >> Johjima’s 2008 (and 2009, of course). Some of that advantage may be offset defensively, but I don’t think we know that at this point.

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