It didn’t seem to be some sort of personal issue to me, but I’ll admit I haven’t read every thread here so perhaps I missed something. It’s just that I’ve seen him bring it up multiple times, even when he, Adam J. Morris (lone star ball) and a few other guys had a roundtable chat previewing the AL West before the season.
It just seemed like an obsession to me so I figured I’d see if there was anything in particular about it.
So how's everyone doing? Nice night....not really trying to be a dick just don't see the humor in the drug jokes....it's kinda lame...and for the MOD of Lookout Landing to be the one making the jokes? Really lame.
I know AJM at Lonestar Ball wouldn’t go there….Just don’t understand why Matthew would? You lost….get over it.
For someone who's not trying to be a dick you're not doing very well at it
Honestly, if you haven’t spent any time here, you really shouldn’t come in and crap on the rug as a way of introducing yourself. If you have a problem with one of the mods, address them directly via the email links at the bottom of the page. If not, please keep your tone a bit more civil.
Why would you join a site to call someone an asshole for making a joke if it’s such a lame joke in the first place? Congratulations on LSB’s winning the SBN Sensitivity Trophy. I imagine that’s why Matthew is sour.
Even if I don’t find a joke funny, it’s hard to piss me off over it… even Tourette’s jokes (I have that… and I fully expect to hear lots of coprolalia jokes even though I don’t have that). I just wonder about motivation for the same not-so-funny joke being said over and over again, which is what started this whole thing in the first place.
I mostly noticed it in the AL West chat roundtable he was in with AJM and some guys representing the A's and Angels
He brought it up there a few times, and that’s where I really took notice of it. My computer hates 900-post gameday threads so I’ve missed quite a lot of what’s been said here.
“Josh Hamilton’s story is so amazing!” stories are way more annoying than “Josh Hamilton does drugs!” jokes.
In general I think most of us would agree that overuse will kill pretty much any joke, but there’s also a tendency here at LL to make jokes in bad taste just for the fun/irony/sarcasm/whatever you want to call it. I wouldn’t expect you to fully understand the way we work — and kudos for not being a complete asshole in this thread — but there’s some context that is probably lost on non-regulars. We really are sticklers for stamping out lame or overused jokes.
I figure it's hard to blame Hamilton for that being the only way an AL West team gets attention from ESPN, though.
Was the drug addiction his own doing? You bet. He’ll be the first to admit to that. I think the idea is that if he can find a way to get himself out of what hole, hopefully the many others in the same situation can find a way to do the same.
But then I am so old that I have known way too many people who try to turn their massive life failures and subsequent repentance into some sort of heroic story.
I find people who never fuck up far more inspirational.
I am glad that he goes around trying to help out others who are in the same situation he was in.
That doesn’t mean he’s going to escape occasional jabs from us. Nobody does even players on our own team that we actually adore. I mean hell, we make gay porn jokes about our center fielder at an incredible rate.
Meh, I wouldn't say we don't take offense here. We just take offense to different things.
I know people have been offended by what I’ve said here and vice versa. Though, I would say that in general, we’re not just randomly dicks to people, and we don’t take offense as personally. We’re just offended for a bit, then we forgive and forget.
I’m never sure how I’m supposed to feel. For instance, here I get:
1) Ew (alright, hahaha)
2) THAT kind… (hahaha, even better. Delightful)
3) <3 (Awwww, it’s not funny, it’s warm and fuzzy!)
And whatever you say, the heart leaves me feeling warm and fuzzy. Which is just downright confusing sometimes. Moral of the story: keep the heart, because fucking with people’s brains is awesome.
Man loosen up a little. This site is run a little differently so unless you want don't want to be keelhauled then try a different approach than calling people asswholes.
Prior to this I have made a single reference to Josh Hamilton and drugs.
I know I brought it up as a joke in the round table on BtB. That makes three cracks at it ever that I can recall. Hardly seems like an obsession to me.
At this point if you were to call him up where would he play?
At 1st we have Branyan who is better.
At DH you have Griffey…
At LF meh… I dunno he’d be the equivalent of Raul Ibanez defense wise and I don’t really know if his bat is that good in a platoon situation.
I was mostly just pointing out something that I was extremely surprised to see. Wonder if he has any kind of a future as a pinch hitter or occasional platoon player? That’d honestly be a much better future than I thought he had.
Wak sounded pissed about the offense. Threatening to make changes.
I think Yuni is in trouble. And it wouldn’t suprise me if Balentien get more time.
Furthermore, Clement could use a hot week here. The team is getting fed up with the lack of offense, so Jeff needs to get his act together (good game tonight) and make it easy to ditch that ass kisser Rob Johnson
Like seriously I just found out that Josh Hamilton was a crack addict
Isn’t it amazing how successful athletes can fritter away their god-given talent on drugs then come back, be worse than everyone thought they were going to be, and be hailed as a hero?
What an amazing story. Why haven’t I heard about this before?
Yeah, he'll make mistakes like that every now and then
Then people post “omg you used their instead of they’re lolololol” in the livejournal feed instead of contacting him directly to let him know. That’s a pet peeve of his.
Yes but I would be lazy and just have it shoot everything that moved
So that wouldn’t be very useful unless somehow I flipped the programming completely and turned it on whenever the opposition hit ground balls to short.
"So that wouldn’t be very useful unless somehow I flipped the programming completely and turned it on whenever the opposition hit ground balls to short."
The only time I drink coffee is that one morning a year I'm stuck eating breakfast at Burger King and I'd rather have a cold frappachino then a 6 oz children's apple juice.
No Matthew, the one who is hanging out with Sean Green is The Man. I can understand how you forgot seeing as how it has been a while since Jeff last updated the series but when he gets around to it I'm sure it will be worth the wait
but that’s still a different kind of stupid. That’s ignorant stupid (applying a stereotype that doesn’t fir the particular region) rather than retarded stupid (using good particularities about the region as an insult)
Silva is just about the worst pitcher in major league history, so being a member of Team Venezuela in the 2009 World Baseball Classic along with Mariners Jose Lopez and Felix Hernandez was a terrible decision by team Venezuela.
for linking this thread at LSB last night. It can be fun to revel in the misery of others, I guess, but mainly I was just pointing out what I find to be a tired joke (although I personally felt that putting the psycho-‘dilla soul eater on there more than made up for it…). I never intended for the trolls to come out like they did. Naive in hindsight, obviously. Anyway, I’m not going to apologize after all. Because in the years of lurking on here, this has turned out to be one of the more entertaining threads I’ve seen. In fact, I take full credit for it.
Also, I’ve never posted here, and probably won’t in the future (what with the divergent rooting interests and all), so I better take this opportunity to say great job to Jeff, Matthew, Graham, and the rest of the folks here, this community is awesome. I read it almost daily during the season.
So why was Vargas out after 73 pitches?
Just not stretched out enough yet?
Mariner John - May 12, 2009
I don't know. He's been starting in Tacoma so that explanation doesn't hold much water.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
It's the only one I could think of.
He seemed to be doing pretty well to me.
Mariner John - May 12, 2009
How much longer is GMZ going to let this crap go on?
We’re worse then the Giants right now.
houseofprime - May 12, 2009
Only one person can save us from mediocre RHP!
They’ll be too lost staring into his dreamy eyes.
Slurvey - May 12, 2009
I hear when you look deep into his eyes you see Graham crying.
kentroyals5 - May 12, 2009
Only if you can get past the maze when you stare into them.
Slurvey - May 12, 2009
Actually, I lied
When you look into his eyes you see the last pitch he swung through. It takes that long.
kentroyals5 - May 12, 2009
You see a groundball singled through the hole on the right side of the infield?
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
We're never going to see him. So let's see what we traded him for.
Let’s see that LH bat NOW!
Sinking Away - May 12, 2009
Dreamy.
msb - May 12, 2009
*ahem*
Aaron Campeau - May 12, 2009
Quit trying
JI - May 12, 2009
I haven't posted this in like nine months.
Aaron Campeau - May 12, 2009
Alas, he'll never play for Seattle again
sigh
JI - May 12, 2009
Mine is about 350,000 times better.
Aaron Campeau - May 12, 2009
That's neither here nor there
JI - May 12, 2009
My heart is full of hatred and loathing.
katal - May 12, 2009
Hey, Matthew, I've been wondering for a while...
What’s with your obsession with Hamilton’s past drug problems?
Inkara1 - May 12, 2009
Yep, this question is a good one and will lead lots of interesting places no doubt
Seriously, this kind of question is better asked in a direct email to the mods.
pdb - May 12, 2009
Matthew = Sore loser + wanna be comedian
Pocket Ninja - May 12, 2009
Math!
Teej - May 12, 2009
MATH IS FOR NERDS AMIRITE
pdb - May 12, 2009
Matthew!
Sec 108 - May 13, 2009
He must take notes from dane cook.
iorange555 - May 12, 2009
Matthew = one of the people that runs this site
if you don’t like it, you’re of course welcome to either address him about it directly via email or not stop by LL any more.
pdb - May 12, 2009
oh and Matthew I'm aware that you don't need anybody to fight your battles for you
pdb - May 12, 2009
What a gallant knight you are
abender20 - May 12, 2009
Do gallant knights wear biking shorts?
Sec 108 - May 13, 2009
only in your dreams big boy
pdb - May 13, 2009
If you don't wear bike shorts, the armor really starts to chafe.
msb - May 13, 2009
Ye Olde Bag Balm will take care of that
pdb - May 13, 2009
Rec'd in the hopes that you meant that the way it came out
abender20 - May 13, 2009
I guess I could e-mail him about it
It didn’t seem to be some sort of personal issue to me, but I’ll admit I haven’t read every thread here so perhaps I missed something. It’s just that I’ve seen him bring it up multiple times, even when he, Adam J. Morris (lone star ball) and a few other guys had a roundtable chat previewing the AL West before the season.
It just seemed like an obsession to me so I figured I’d see if there was anything in particular about it.
Inkara1 - May 12, 2009
Hamilton smokes crack huh huh....what kind of dump is this that he's a MOD here?
Fuck you, asshole.
Pocket Ninja - May 12, 2009
Maybe everyone's so fucking tired of hearing his salvation story that the only way to stay sane is to make fun of it.
Are you 10 years old? Who trolls baseball sites?
Teej - May 12, 2009
yeah, I can see you'll last a while around here
Seriously – keep it civil, please. If you just joined to troll, it’s been nice seeing you.
pdb - May 12, 2009
I'm not going to go to another site and insult the mods over it
It’s a genuine question I have and I figured instead of calling someone an asshole, I’d be better off asking my question.
THEN I might judge, but not before.
Inkara1 - May 12, 2009
And your approach is appreciated
pdb - May 12, 2009
Um pretty sure this isn't the best way to introduce yourself
Nick S - May 12, 2009
On the contrary it tells us all we need to know in two lines
you gotta appreciate that kind of brevity.
pdb - May 12, 2009
Upon further review he just joined from LSB so yeah
One fewer poster to take seriously!
Nick S - May 12, 2009
So how's everyone doing? Nice night....not really trying to be a dick just don't see the humor in the drug jokes....it's kinda lame...and for the MOD of Lookout Landing to be the one making the jokes? Really lame.
I know AJM at Lonestar Ball wouldn’t go there….Just don’t understand why Matthew would? You lost….get over it.
Pocket Ninja - May 12, 2009
Stop being so fucking sensitive about a joke
gregrabble - May 12, 2009
For some this is a joke but for others it is not.
Right Guard - May 12, 2009
Everything can be a joke.
Generally when people joke about these things they aren’t actually horrible people. They are just trying to be funny.
Mariner John - May 12, 2009
I'm a horrible person
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
I understand that.
I was just commenting in case some other people might have missed it.
Right Guard - May 12, 2009
Rule #1 I had to learn about LL.
Take nothing seriously.
Sec 108 - May 13, 2009
The solution is to never make a joke ever
Dewey N - May 13, 2009
For someone who's not trying to be a dick you're not doing very well at it
Honestly, if you haven’t spent any time here, you really shouldn’t come in and crap on the rug as a way of introducing yourself. If you have a problem with one of the mods, address them directly via the email links at the bottom of the page. If not, please keep your tone a bit more civil.
pdb - May 12, 2009
Why do you care?
Why would you join a site to call someone an asshole for making a joke if it’s such a lame joke in the first place? Congratulations on LSB’s winning the SBN Sensitivity Trophy. I imagine that’s why Matthew is sour.
Teej - May 12, 2009
And people wonder why the mods love drinking good beer all the time
coping mechanisms are awesome.
pdb - May 12, 2009
You would think watching Mariners' baseball all year would be enough motivation to drink.
Fin - May 12, 2009
You sure Halos Heaven doesn't still have that trophy?
Inkara1 - May 12, 2009
It's like the World Cup, win it three times and you get to keep it
so the new trophy’s still up for grabs.
pdb - May 12, 2009
You would think the Adenhart deal would've made HH a lock.
Fin - May 12, 2009
Sorry, that might've been too soon.
Fin - May 12, 2009
HH's lack of a sense of humor goes back a lot farther than Adenhart
That’s why I was asking if they still have the sensitivity trophy.
Inkara1 - May 12, 2009
Hmm, well I don't know, I don't read HH
But if anything, LL is the complete opposite, which is perfect for people like me, who aren’t easy to offend.
Fin - May 12, 2009
I'm pretty hard to offend, too
Even if I don’t find a joke funny, it’s hard to piss me off over it… even Tourette’s jokes (I have that… and I fully expect to hear lots of coprolalia jokes even though I don’t have that). I just wonder about motivation for the same not-so-funny joke being said over and over again, which is what started this whole thing in the first place.
Inkara1 - May 12, 2009
He's brought it up like 3 times
I’m the one who always makes fun of Hamilton and the nose candy
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
I mostly noticed it in the AL West chat roundtable he was in with AJM and some guys representing the A's and Angels
He brought it up there a few times, and that’s where I really took notice of it. My computer hates 900-post gameday threads so I’ve missed quite a lot of what’s been said here.
Inkara1 - May 12, 2009
My take:
“Josh Hamilton’s story is so amazing!” stories are way more annoying than “Josh Hamilton does drugs!” jokes.
In general I think most of us would agree that overuse will kill pretty much any joke, but there’s also a tendency here at LL to make jokes in bad taste just for the fun/irony/sarcasm/whatever you want to call it. I wouldn’t expect you to fully understand the way we work — and kudos for not being a complete asshole in this thread — but there’s some context that is probably lost on non-regulars. We really are sticklers for stamping out lame or overused jokes.
Teej - May 12, 2009
Jush like Hamilton was a stickler for not not doing the cocaine
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
I figure it's hard to blame Hamilton for that being the only way an AL West team gets attention from ESPN, though.
Was the drug addiction his own doing? You bet. He’ll be the first to admit to that. I think the idea is that if he can find a way to get himself out of what hole, hopefully the many others in the same situation can find a way to do the same.
Inkara1 - May 12, 2009
I find it pretty inspirational.
I’m also really, really tired of hearing about it. It’s nothing against him — just the saturation and incessant nature of the story.
Teej - May 12, 2009
So what we need to do is go to the ESPN offices in Connecticut and sell THEM nose candy, instead.
Inkara1 - May 12, 2009
I do not find it inspirational at all.
But then I am so old that I have known way too many people who try to turn their massive life failures and subsequent repentance into some sort of heroic story.
I find people who never fuck up far more inspirational.
Sec 108 - May 13, 2009
Cheap redemption stories are a dime a dozen
pdb - May 13, 2009
I am glad that he goes around trying to help out others who are in the same situation he was in.
That doesn’t mean he’s going to escape occasional jabs from us. Nobody does even players on our own team that we actually adore. I mean hell, we make gay porn jokes about our center fielder at an incredible rate.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
Would it be OK for me to make gay porn jokes about your CF too?
I’m trying to find a way to make a good “light up a fag” joke considering the British nationality of one of the mods here.
Inkara1 - May 12, 2009
It pretty much writes itself
JI - May 12, 2009
Goodness.
Teej - May 12, 2009
Meat Market!
JI - May 12, 2009
Look at that chin!
Teej - May 12, 2009
"Think I can get it in all the way to the pine tar?"
abender20 - May 12, 2009
Ahhhhhh!!!!
royalcurve - May 12, 2009
What? He's talking about pitching inside, that's al.
abender20 - May 12, 2009
Well this is disgusting and fantastic.
Teej - May 12, 2009
and thus must be rec'd
JI - May 12, 2009
I rec this out of fear.
.Taylor - May 12, 2009
Yes, I made this one green.
Can’t stop laughing.
Mariner John - May 12, 2009
I'll admit it, I shivered when I first saw that.
.Taylor - May 12, 2009
Someone help me come up with a good "maple bat" joke
Inkara1 - May 12, 2009
Wouldn't want it to shatter whilst doing something gay with it up your pooper because you might get splinters in your butt.
JI - May 12, 2009
That's why everyone needs a good piece of ash now and again.
Inkara1 - May 12, 2009
But has he ever done cocaine?
If not Matthew won’t pay him any attention
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
You can do/say whatever you want about our players at LSB.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
Meh, I wouldn't say we don't take offense here. We just take offense to different things.
I know people have been offended by what I’ve said here and vice versa. Though, I would say that in general, we’re not just randomly dicks to people, and we don’t take offense as personally. We’re just offended for a bit, then we forgive and forget.
At least, that’s how I’ve seen it.
BrettJMiller - May 13, 2009
We take offense at ignorance I would say.
Matthew - May 13, 2009
I'd say that's mostly accurate
BrettJMiller - May 13, 2009
Is it called the "Halos Heaven SBN Sensitivity Perpetual Trophy"?
Inkara1 - May 12, 2009
It's been renamed the Adenhart Cup
pdb - May 12, 2009
This thread has the makings of a signature LL Offend-A-Thon!
Teej - May 12, 2009
Ew.
Oh, THAT kind of cup.
royalcurve - May 12, 2009
Your sig always throws me off.
I’m never sure how I’m supposed to feel. For instance, here I get:
1) Ew (alright, hahaha)
2) THAT kind… (hahaha, even better. Delightful)
3) <3 (Awwww, it’s not funny, it’s warm and fuzzy!)
And whatever you say, the heart leaves me feeling warm and fuzzy. Which is just downright confusing sometimes. Moral of the story: keep the heart, because fucking with people’s brains is awesome.
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
It's no better than the drunk opposing fan yelling "Hamilton smokes crack.." from the stands. Are you that belligerent?
Pocket Ninja - May 12, 2009
Are you that sensitive?
Really – why does this bother you so much? Do you boo A-Rod when he comes back to Arlington? If so, stop complaining about people harassing Hamilton.
pdb - May 12, 2009
He wrote "snorts" not "smokes"
By the way
gregrabble - May 12, 2009
What you're doing here is pretty much the definition of belligerent.
Teej - May 12, 2009
Yes?
I also want Hamilton to die in a car crash
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Alone
pdb - May 12, 2009
I was gonna say but with Rob Johnson in the car as well.
Slurvey - May 12, 2009
Are you kidding?
I hope he shares his crack with half of the Rangers lineup and they collectively wrap themselves around a lamp post
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
I'm enjoying this way too much
gregrabble - May 12, 2009
I would imagine him and Kinsler having a good time.
Fin - May 12, 2009
I did catch myself thinking tonight about how little I'm going to be able to tolerate facing Davis and Andrus 16 games a season.
Might as well take care of them all at once.
katal - May 12, 2009
Preferably via drunk driver to the face
OlSalty - May 13, 2009
Josh Hamilton is a selfish prick who could have been in the World Series last year if he didn't try to throw his life away
everybody is fucking sick of hearing about him, and we wish he’d get Ardenhart’d and die
JI - May 12, 2009
Rec'd for extreme insensitivity.
Hooray for a blanket-pissing off
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
I love that an LSB'er flagged this
It’s like they’re extraordinarily sensitive to the fact that Josh Hamilton did cocaine
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Really now?
Fin - May 13, 2009
And you're a fan of Ankiel, who literally tried to throw his career away?
kentroyals5 - May 12, 2009
lol u sure pwned ji dood
Aaron Campeau - May 12, 2009
k
kentroyals5 - May 12, 2009
Please don't use chatspeak on LL
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Ok.
kentroyals5 - May 12, 2009
Co-Kne?
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
This comment fails on so many levels it amazing
JI - May 12, 2009
Actually I think literally he was trying to throw strikes and just did very badly at it
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Mental illnesses is never worth making jokes about.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
You bitch
http://www.sbnation.com/users/Matthew/search?advanced_search=true&all_these_words=robert&btn=Search&order=date&q=robert&scope=network&search_user[username]=Matthew&type=Comment
Robert - May 12, 2009
Hey buddy. There's a handy tutorial on using the link button that some savagely sexy person wrote.
Make use of it!
Matthew - May 12, 2009
Are you living vicariously through me living vicariously through you again?
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Once giant link does not make up for a lack of a half dozen small links
JI - May 12, 2009
That is something you would say.
And you did!
Matthew - May 12, 2009
I'll assume that that's why your grammar
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
It's more my editing than my grammar.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
The hitters in the Appalachian League would disagree
JI - May 12, 2009
I once told Hamilton I would get him some Heroin if he let JJ Putz strike him out.
He then homered in that at bat and Texas won the game. At least I didn’t have to go get him drugs.
BrettJMiller - May 13, 2009
Oh boy, what a relief!
Fin - May 13, 2009
I know, that's what I thought
BrettJMiller - May 13, 2009
I just love when people like this come here.
BrettJMiller - May 13, 2009
Man loosen up a little. This site is run a little differently so unless you want don't want to be keelhauled then try a different approach than calling people asswholes.
Slurvey - May 12, 2009
I eat with gusto, damn, you bet!
We’re sailing round the cape!
Keelhaul him said the bo’sun
there must be no escape!
pdb - May 12, 2009
Much too late for that.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
Men Men Men ...
It’s great to be on a ship with men
And sail across the sea-o
We don’t know where we’ll land or when
But it’s great to be with men
‘Cause men can sweat and men can stink
And no one seems to care-o
We’ll throw the dishes in the sink
And clog the sink with hair-o
Men, men, men, it’s a ship filled with men
So batten down the ladies room,
There’s no one here but men
msb - May 12, 2009
what
.Taylor - May 12, 2009
You are a disgrace to all people who reference what section they sit in with their username.
Sec 108 - May 13, 2009
I looked back through the LL archive.
Prior to this I have made a single reference to Josh Hamilton and drugs.
I know I brought it up as a joke in the round table on BtB. That makes three cracks at it ever that I can recall. Hardly seems like an obsession to me.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
Not like Josh Hamilton's obsession with the cocaine anyway
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Zing!
gregrabble - May 12, 2009
And looking through the round table chat, here are my lone two references to Josh Hamilton and drugs.
3:39
Eric Seidman: Do you mean Josh Hamilton’s numbers or references to his amazing story.
3:39
Matthew Carruth: I heard he took drugs of some kind
…
4:02
Matthew Carruth: I have to meet up with Josh Hamilton to sell him some candy. For his nose.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
My God where do you dig up this gold
oc - May 12, 2009
Columbia
I hear it’s also a lucrative country for cocaine manufacture
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Soon you'll have a formula for cokeRAA!
oc - May 12, 2009
Why would I need one?
Josh Hamilton wins noses down
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
To show everyone that you know what you're talking about DUH
oc - May 12, 2009
I tend to resort to my degrees for that
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Scan it and make it your avatar stupid
oc - May 13, 2009
Them
Graham MacAree - May 13, 2009
THE FUCK YOU SAY
oc - May 13, 2009
Not that often unless the Mariners manage to get a hit
Graham MacAree - May 13, 2009
Too bad the centerfielder from Texas keeps taking ours.
CapSea - May 13, 2009
I was going to say that was a 'low blow'
oc - May 13, 2009
I don't get it
Graham MacAree - May 13, 2009
By the look of this thread, I'd say you have a clue
oc - May 13, 2009
This is fantastic
seattlebruin - May 13, 2009
1's a pattern, 2 is a troll-worthy offfense.
abender20 - May 12, 2009
Three cracks?
That’s better than Josh Hamilton could say.
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
I think it's because in the past Hamilton struggled with drug addiction.
Right Guard - May 12, 2009
Is it true that he snorted cocaine?
Nick S - May 12, 2009
Has anybody seen what Bryan LaHair has done against righties in the minors?
That’s a fluke, right? There’s no way he’ll every actually be a worthwhile player is there?
DAMellen - May 12, 2009
At this point if you were to call him up where would he play?
At 1st we have Branyan who is better.
At DH you have Griffey…
At LF meh… I dunno he’d be the equivalent of Raul Ibanez defense wise and I don’t really know if his bat is that good in a platoon situation.
Slurvey - May 12, 2009
I wasn't saying that I'd bring him up right now.
I was mostly just pointing out something that I was extremely surprised to see. Wonder if he has any kind of a future as a pinch hitter or occasional platoon player? That’d honestly be a much better future than I thought he had.
DAMellen - May 12, 2009
I would be interested in seeing that happen.
For some other team.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
COCAINE
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
What is, "A classic Eric Clapton song?"
Inkara1 - May 12, 2009
COCAINE!
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Wrong it's "what are, things that Josh Hamilton does"
gregrabble - May 12, 2009
WRONG is "what are things that Josh Hamilton did"
He historically overcame it and went on to glory
Brian Floyd - May 12, 2009
My bad
He’s a hero, a glorious hero
gregrabble - May 12, 2009
No, I'm sorry. The word we were looking for was "vainglorious."
We’ll see you next time on the $25,000 Pyramid!
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
I'm sorry the word you were looking for was cocaine
Nick S - May 12, 2009
COCAINE
gregrabble - May 12, 2009
Josh Hamilton used to do it
gregrabble - May 12, 2009
Well fuck.
Should have known that one, I had a great time though
gregrabble - May 12, 2009
Actually, it was written by J.J. Cale
a well known songwriter.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
You think Hamilton and Richard Gasquet have the same dealer?
The same COCAINE dealer, I mean.
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
I thought you meant Chevy dealer. My bad.
Inkara1 - May 12, 2009
Hamilton only drives Ford Rangers
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
My dad had a '94 Ranger
It was a great truck. 4.0 V6, 2WD, 5-speed.
Inkara1 - May 12, 2009
So Hamilton isn't the only Ranger with 5 (grams of) speed
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
I don't know how much speed that truck had in it because the speedometer only went to 85
Inkara1 - May 12, 2009
Franklin helps out!
Nick S - May 12, 2009
It seems pitching against the Mariners is like pitching against a AAA team.
Fin - May 12, 2009
I'm banning every LSB poster who posts again in this thread who isn't Adam Morris or Ed Coffin
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Go...Mariners?
Oh, Belts, you were just heating up! GAH.
Charles Gipson is a Mangod - May 12, 2009
Wow. That's a real Murderer's Row up there.
I’m shaking in my boots.
msb - May 12, 2009
Yuni finally got to one!
JI - May 12, 2009
When did Texas start mowing their outfield grass in a US Army camouflage fatigue pattern?
It’s really distracting.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
That's roughly the best video quality my computer can do when working with the flash player!
JI - May 12, 2009
Good... that means the groundskeeper isn't doing cocaine or anything.
Inkara1 - May 12, 2009
Much unlike Josh Hamilton
gregrabble - May 12, 2009
Maybe just turning down the frame rate is enough
Experiments!
JI - May 12, 2009
Hahahaha
So cruel. He ranges to his left finally and knoblauchs the throw. 1 of 2 isn’t bad…unless it’s your job to catch and make the throw
Brian Floyd - May 12, 2009
Maybe someone should tell him that it's his job.
Sinking Away - May 12, 2009
Is it just me but with the lone exception of the Burger King one, your gifs have gotten quite shitty?
Robert - May 12, 2009
Only if you are big into picture quality
JI - May 12, 2009
JI has single-handedly de-valued .gifs of plays recs
seattlebruin - May 13, 2009
Will Yuni challenge Raul for most .gifs?
JLProck - May 13, 2009
Have I mentioned that Josh Hamilton used to do cocaine?
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
News to me
Next you’re going to tell me he found god, turned his life around, and became a superstar.
Brian Floyd - May 12, 2009
His home run derby performance filled me with love.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
But he had to stop playing the corners in case he got too close to the foul lines
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Winner
Brian Floyd - May 12, 2009
That joke is old and not a winner.
Much like how winner’s don’t do drugs.
Unlike Josh Hamilton.
Who did drugs.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
Unless I am mistake his team won tonight and he had the game winning hit, therefore he is a winner.
JI - May 12, 2009
The 1980s lied to me?
Matthew - May 12, 2009
As did the Ninja Turtles and Simpsons arcade games.
JI - May 12, 2009
And cheesy sitcoms and PSA's
Brian Floyd - May 12, 2009
Rick Reilly told me.
Teej - May 12, 2009
I thought he was into underage boys.
JI - May 12, 2009
Seems I was correct
http://www.lookoutlanding.com/2009/5/12/873742/16-17-chart#15643686
JI - May 12, 2009
Underage boys and COCAINE
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Snorting baby powder?
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
With the amount of COCAINE that Josh Hamilton has had
I wouldn’t be surprised if his brain had become addled enough from all the COCAINE to think that baby powder might have been COCAINE
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
I was thinking the REALLY underaged boys
But that works too.
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
I'm somewhat surprised he chose a profession where he's surrounded by a white substance.
kentroyals5 - May 12, 2009
Wak sounded pissed about the offense. Threatening to make changes.
I think Yuni is in trouble. And it wouldn’t suprise me if Balentien get more time.
Furthermore, Clement could use a hot week here. The team is getting fed up with the lack of offense, so Jeff needs to get his act together (good game tonight) and make it easy to ditch that ass kisser Rob Johnson
Rudy4three - May 12, 2009
Back on the boat little man
Time to float back to the homeland
Brian Floyd - May 12, 2009
Cedeno may get some time, but I wouldn
Sinking Away - May 12, 2009
*would be surprised to see Clement any time soon.
Sinking Away - May 12, 2009
Haha, Yuni is in trouble.
I’ll believe it when I see it.
Wilder. - May 12, 2009
Meanwhile
Here’s Don Wakamatsu kicking the Mariners’ asses.
ThundaPC - May 12, 2009
That's very good to hear
Hopefully some significant changes will be made before it gets too out of hand
gregrabble - May 12, 2009
His fault for sticking with Yuni and not using Olson against Hamilton
JI - May 12, 2009
"I think sometimes it's a lack of focus, and there's no excuse for it"
msb - May 12, 2009
Yuni go away. And Beltre is probably the easiest out alive in a close game. Talk about a choker.
Sadly, probably the two players with the lowest IQ in MLB right now.
What a waste of an unexpectedly solid start by Vargas.
Sam Regens - May 12, 2009
Hear Hear or Here Here. I'm not sure which or witch.
Sinking Away - May 12, 2009
The former
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Thanks.
Sinking Away - May 12, 2009
Unless you are cheering on the statement about Beltre being a choker or the easiest out in a close game.
In which case the proper response is derisive laughter followed by a simple head shake, the word ‘no’ and walking away.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
Yeah, I was going for the proper response. I guess I missed it.
Sinking Away - May 12, 2009
Or being stupid.
Mariner John - May 12, 2009
"Hear, hear," short for "hear, all ye good people, hear what this brilliant and eloquent speaker has to say"
Inkara1 - May 12, 2009
Jesus
BrettJMiller - May 13, 2009
Easy on the religiion there.
JLProck - May 13, 2009
This game made me feel bad. I need therapy.
.Taylor - May 12, 2009
Probably you do.
Sinking Away - May 12, 2009
I've just grabbed some footage of Texas's post game interviews:
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
His nose looks surprisingly good for someone who keeps it full of clams
abender20 - May 12, 2009
(that means he's dreaming about cocaine)
(which he used to do. A lot)
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Like seriously I just found out that Josh Hamilton was a crack addict
Isn’t it amazing how successful athletes can fritter away their god-given talent on drugs then come back, be worse than everyone thought they were going to be, and be hailed as a hero?
What an amazing story. Why haven’t I heard about this before?
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
(Cocaine is an upper)
(Means he was strung out and didn’t sleep and therefor didn’t dream)
Brian Floyd - May 12, 2009
You people are mean.
R.J. Anderson - May 12, 2009
Go dry hump a furry.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
And do some cocaine
It might make you feel better about losing Josh Hamilton to a tragic drug addiction
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
But he heroically overcame it.
Heroically.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
I wish I could fuck up enough in life to become a hero for overcoming COCAINE addiction
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
I decided not to have a beer tonight!
Someone should blow me now.
Aaron Campeau - May 12, 2009
Josh Hamilton would for some crack
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Heroic overcomings sounds like Robert when he sees Felix
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
How else would you hump a furry?
R.J. Anderson - May 12, 2009
moistly?
Matthew - May 12, 2009
Hose that puppy down
Brian Floyd - May 12, 2009
Or chicken... or cat... or dinosaur... or....
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
furry robot?
Matthew - May 12, 2009
After that, they take over the world
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
SO ATTRACTIVE MUST RESIST
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
How can you resist that ass?
Not to mention the tongue
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
You'd have to be high.
R.J. Anderson - May 12, 2009
on COCAINE
Brian Floyd - May 12, 2009
Or just sly
Robert - May 12, 2009
Poor Brian
Mariner John - May 12, 2009
Poor OrlandoRays :(
R.J. Anderson - May 12, 2009
Whatever, that sustained us through about three weeks of 2008.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
STRASBURG!
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
How did you two celebrate your anniversary
Robert - May 12, 2009
I took off my pants for his no-hitter
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
I still believe that fanpost would've broken all sorts of boundaries.
R.J. Anderson - May 12, 2009
Oh yeah, that reminds me.
Fuck Bill Bavasi.
Adam Jones is ridiculous.
R.J. Anderson - May 12, 2009
I was thinking the same thing
Watching the BBTN highlights got me choked up. They were talking about him and Longo being the future and playing the game right
FUCK YOU BAVASI
Brian Floyd - May 12, 2009
He plays the game right?
Really?
Really?
Matthew - May 12, 2009
Obviously just lazy ESPN people
The Orioles have Markakis play the game in right.
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
Well, it was kruky talking
Grain of salt
Brian Floyd - May 12, 2009
Well they both play excellent defense and are fantastic hitters so technically it's true.
Aaron Campeau - May 12, 2009
Needs a more inspirational background story.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
Let's get them hooked on heroin
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Evan Longoria's name sounds like a hot chick so he probably got teased
and Adam Jones falls asleep every time flashbulbs go off which makes things hard in marquee games.
Aaron Campeau - May 12, 2009
Stop being such a racist asshole
No wonder LL is such a cesspit
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Adam Jones also gets his posse to shoot people at strip clubs
seattlebruin - May 13, 2009
Don't call him "Pacman" anymore
Inkara1 - May 13, 2009
Adam overcame narcolepsy
The Typical Idiot Fan - May 13, 2009
I think this is the first time they've said this about a black player.
JI - May 12, 2009
How did he do today?
Robert - May 12, 2009
Jeff Clement had a home run and a double
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Jeff Clement is not black, an outfielder, right-handed
Or good, therefore he is not Adam Jones.
R.J. Anderson - May 12, 2009
He's never going to be on our team, deal with it already.
Sinking Away - May 12, 2009
Trade you for...
What do you have…that we need and will play.
Sinking Away - May 12, 2009
Yeah but he's actively fucking up R.J.'s life.
Aaron Campeau - May 12, 2009
Rec'd for Jeff Clement is not good
seattlebruin - May 13, 2009
If only we had traded him instead
Robert - May 12, 2009
Jeff Clement was valued by the front office roughly the same at the time.
The trade was not intelligent but I can understand why they went with Jones based on Catcher generally being a harder position to fill.
Right Guard - May 12, 2009
*whoosh*
Robert - May 12, 2009
I sometimes cannot figure out how you manage to read this blog.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
I can't figure out how anyone manages to read it.
Enough with the cocaine already. It’s hard enough as is.
Sinking Away - May 12, 2009
Am I incorrect?
If so, would somebody mind pointing me in the correct direction of a LL/SABER primer?
Right Guard - May 12, 2009
Yes
Alt+F4
d0nkey - May 13, 2009
Two homeruns and countless line drive catches.
R.J. Anderson - May 12, 2009
2-4 with 2 HR and 4 RBI
Right Guard - May 12, 2009
I still can't tell what I'm looking for here
Is it the otter(?) making the pelvic thrust?
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
No it's Josh Hamilton doing cocaine
Haven’t you been paying attention?
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Off of the pelvic thrusting otter(?)?
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
Who knows
You do some crazy things when you’re on cocaine
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Didn't Josh Hamilton do it once?
We should ask him…
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
I believe you were responsible for this as well
R.J. Anderson - May 12, 2009
I'm not sure if this is a good thing but this always makes me laugh.
Mariner John - May 12, 2009
The sad part is, I know the raccoon in this one personally
Nice guy, professional magician, but one of his exes was a psycho bitch.
R.J. Anderson - May 12, 2009
My stars.
royalcurve - May 13, 2009
Did he make her disappear?
Sec 108 - May 13, 2009
Wouldn't you be better off doing the 'saw a lady in half' trick?
Then throwing the top half in the dumpster and keeping the bottom tucked away in your closet for a rainy day?
d0nkey - May 13, 2009
This seems like my work
JI - May 12, 2009
I am pretty sure you are all assholes and I made both of these GIF's
OlSalty - May 13, 2009
You have succeeded when Robert has failed
and for that, you sir have earned a precious rec.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
FUCKING BULLSHIT
Robert - May 12, 2009
Where did fake arm girl go?
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Different take
JI - May 12, 2009
What is, "How not to do cocaine?"
(based on a lecture series by Texas Ranger Josh Hamilton)
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
rec'd for moist
JI - May 12, 2009
You a fan of webcomic Something Positive?
Furries explained
Inkara1 - May 12, 2009
They used "their" when they should have used "they're"
BrettJMiller - May 13, 2009
Yeah, he'll make mistakes like that every now and then
Then people post “omg you used their instead of they’re lolololol” in the livejournal feed instead of contacting him directly to let him know. That’s a pet peeve of his.
Inkara1 - May 13, 2009
I can absolutely sympathize with that pet peeve.
Matthew - May 13, 2009
I think Fiddle Cat and Josh Hamilton were getting from the same guy
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
I'd be more pissed if I were you
You know, the whole should be doing this in our organization until he did blow and we had to cut our losses deal
Brian Floyd - May 12, 2009
At least blow doesnt kill mitochondria.
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
Are you sure?
Matthew - May 12, 2009
Dude, Rocco's white, don't mock him.
R.J. Anderson - May 12, 2009
Dingos have a race?
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
Know what else is white?
cocaine
Brian Floyd - May 12, 2009
I was looking for "Rocco's white what?"
R.J. Anderson - May 12, 2009
Nope, but a doctor misdiagnosing the disorder does
Brian Floyd - May 12, 2009
Yeah, but without it, we may never get Friedman, Longoria, Price, etc.
So whatever.
R.J. Anderson - May 12, 2009
I'll chalk that up as a win
Brian Floyd - May 12, 2009
Clean up afterwards, Hamilton might see the dust
and think that it is COCAINE
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
cOCaiNE!!!!
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
hell of a drug amirite
JI - May 12, 2009
So who's stupider?
Vicente Padilla or Yuniesky Betancourt?
Mariner John - May 12, 2009
Assuming that's a legitimate question, I vote Yuseless.
Sinking Away - May 12, 2009
I don't think LL and LSB get along
Jeff Sullivan - May 12, 2009
There is definitely a thin white line between LL and LSB.
kentroyals5 - May 12, 2009
We should use their OT's just for fun.
Robert - May 12, 2009
They get to discuss politics and we resent them for being able to do so.
JI - May 12, 2009
I dunno, I bet if Josh Hamilton saw this he'd be snorting with laughter
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
I think this is the best Hamilton joke of the day.
Inkara1 - May 13, 2009
Lahaighter*
Fin - May 13, 2009
They're the only blog that trolls us.
Aaron Campeau - May 12, 2009
http://www.lookoutlanding.com/2008/7/7/566634/7-7-open-game-thread#7230817
Robert - May 12, 2009
That's not trolling, they're actually like that.
Aaron Campeau - May 12, 2009
I posted a giant picture of a stick figure raping another stick figure with a mariners cock and nobody fucking blinked
Robert - May 12, 2009
Well what the fuck else is there to do in Florida?
Aaron Campeau - May 12, 2009
Die.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
Disney world and universal studious and sea world and buschard gardens and cape kennedy and epcot and ripleys believe it or not among other
Robert - May 12, 2009
Florida blows.
Aaron Campeau - May 12, 2009
My vacations in 1989, 1990, 2001 and 2004 agree to disagree
Robert - May 12, 2009
Fuck your vacations.
My residence from 1996-2004 disagrees with your vacations. Florida does suck.
Fin - May 13, 2009
and animal kingdom
Robert - May 12, 2009
http://www.lonestarball.com/2009/5/12/873670/18-14#15642853
JI - May 12, 2009
Goddanm these are the worst non-DRB comments ever
JI - May 12, 2009
Shitty coffee? What the fuck?
Aaron Campeau - May 12, 2009
Coffee is for fags
Jeff Sullivan - May 12, 2009
Call me Frankie's Butt Buddy then.
Aaron Campeau - May 12, 2009
Says the man who once made up go 30 minutes out of our way to sample coffee form each of Seattle's main coffee chains.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
Adorable
Robert - May 12, 2009
I bet he was doing it ironically.
JI - May 12, 2009
I love coffee but I just want LSB to like me
:(
Jeff Sullivan - May 12, 2009
Post more pictures of you and Hitler
That should do the trick
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
I like you
oc - May 13, 2009
You're one of three people from which this is a good thing to hear.
Aaron Campeau - May 13, 2009
No he's not
Graham MacAree - May 13, 2009
He's better than most of them
Jeff Sullivan - May 13, 2009
But then we don't really have to have this discussion
Jeff Sullivan - May 13, 2009
What?
Matthew - May 13, 2009
I think oc is fucking hilarious.
Aaron Campeau - May 13, 2009
I was more objecting to your blanket noun of people.
Matthew - May 13, 2009
Well I'm just all sorts of confused.
Aaron Campeau - May 13, 2009
So's your face.
Matthew - May 13, 2009
Picasso's acblue period?
Robert Lintott - May 13, 2009
Men don't tend to have periods
Graham MacAree - May 13, 2009
As to why you'd name one after acblue I have no idea
Graham MacAree - May 13, 2009
I'd be more concerned about the blue.
Sounds like a kidney problem.
Matthew - May 13, 2009
=
JI - May 13, 2009
That's not cool, JI. The dude's on air character killed himself.
Show some respect.
Matthew - May 13, 2009
Spoilers you bitch
Robert - May 13, 2009
:()
My bad.
Matthew - May 13, 2009
This emoticon is more racist than the National Watermelon Fanclub.
Aaron Campeau - May 13, 2009
My apologies to their spokesman.
Matthew - May 13, 2009
This is the best thing I've seen in days
Robert Lintott - May 13, 2009
JI - May 13, 2009
People from other parts of the country must think we're the worst people alive.
Aaron Campeau - May 13, 2009
Like people from Texas do
Graham MacAree - May 13, 2009
They actually have to pretend like they're not racists though.
Aaron Campeau - May 13, 2009
They think we're awful because we have a sense of humour and something approximating intellect
Graham MacAree - May 13, 2009
The point is that northwesterners that don't suck are the vilest people on the planet.
Aaron Campeau - May 13, 2009
But people from Texas are the worst people alive
JI - May 13, 2009
Except Austin
An Oasis in the middle of a wasteland.
Fin - May 13, 2009
I kind of like parts of Texas.
Aaron Campeau - May 13, 2009
The parts that aren't in Texas!
amirite?!?!?!
Matthew - May 13, 2009
I don't think you're right based on the context of acblue's comment
Graham MacAree - May 13, 2009
He meant the parts
that were ravaged by the hurricane. Who doesn’t revel in the pain and suffering of Texans?
jimmylauderdale - May 13, 2009
Why is a white hand holding the watermelon?
Fin - May 13, 2009
The NWF welcomes everyone.
Aaron Campeau - May 13, 2009
Whoever .gif'ed that doesn't half-ass racism.
Glad to see quality work; it’s so rare these days.
Inkara1 - May 13, 2009
It got me craving some Grape Drink
Fin - May 13, 2009
Isn't that kinda like Tampico but in grape?
Wants to be juice when it grows up?
Inkara1 - May 13, 2009
Spelled it wrong.
Big Jared - May 13, 2009
There is a space in there.
If you forget it, you tend to sound condescending
Robert - May 13, 2009
Would have been better if I didn't get a HEY Y'ALL KUMAR'S DEAD spoiler from the fan club in my e-mail
JI - May 13, 2009
Well that seems weird seeing as how that's a completely different on air character.
Those people seem misinformed.
Matthew - May 13, 2009
Like I can remember his name
JI - May 13, 2009
Test for sarcoidosis
Graham MacAree - May 13, 2009
Mine has as picture
JI - May 13, 2009
Checking for gunshot wounds to the head seem like it would be a better use of time
Robert - May 13, 2009
Well that's a relief.
Aaron Campeau - May 13, 2009
Then why am I bleeding?
Robert - May 13, 2009
I understand your desire to feel a woman's pain but you have to remember to disinfect the razor blades.
Aaron Campeau - May 13, 2009
jimmylauderdale - May 13, 2009
Gynecologist Graham is in. The doctor will see you now
Robert Lintott - May 13, 2009
That actually sounds like an interesting comic-book hero
JI - May 13, 2009
Gynecologist Graham and his sidekick Midwife Matthew?
Robert Lintott - May 13, 2009
Matthew would be a shitty sidekick because he can never stop cracking Josh Hamilton cocaine jokes
Talk about conspicuous
Graham MacAree - May 13, 2009
You could always team up with 'jina Jeff
Robert Lintott - May 13, 2009
What sucks is there is not a whole lot that goes with J
Jeff the Jack
Jeff the Jerk
Jeff the Jock…well, that isn’t so bad actually.
Fin - May 13, 2009
Gynecologist Graham and Jackin' Jeff?
Robert Lintott - May 13, 2009
Judge Jeff?
Fin - May 13, 2009
How about Jeff the Janitor?
Fin - May 13, 2009
How do you get to be a certified gynecologist with so little training?
Seems fishy to me.
Matthew - May 13, 2009
That's just the ambiant smell
Robert Lintott - May 13, 2009
Thanks for hanging a neon sign around the second part of the joke.
Matthew - May 13, 2009
It's like a PBR sign too, nice and low-class
Robert Lintott - May 13, 2009
I was actually being sarcastic with my words.
I was not actually pleased.
Matthew - May 13, 2009
I knew as much
That’s why I chose a shitty beer reference for the resident beer czar
Robert Lintott - May 13, 2009
All you need to do now is work in the Queef Sisters
JI - May 13, 2009
Way to make this joke more stall than your giffing ability
Robert - May 13, 2009
I just wanted to type Queef and have it not seem quite as gratuitous as it usually would
JI - May 13, 2009
Up to date certification
Graham MacAree - May 13, 2009
I was going to make a joke about bleeding out the butt
then I decided not to
JI - May 13, 2009
I ended up in the hospital for a week because of that. Fucking scary.
Side effect of Henoch-Schonlein Purpura.
Inkara1 - May 13, 2009
Yes in fact there is currently a look of confusion on my face at the moment.
Aaron Campeau - May 13, 2009
It's all about Diet Mountain Dew.
Fin - May 12, 2009
Maybe SBN should have considered that away fans are annoying before they decided having more interconnectedness between blogs was a good idea
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
72 hour waiting periods are a good idea
JI - May 12, 2009
Or turning off the ability to post comments from certain blogs during series against that team would be nice too
Or forever, in the case of HH
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
It'll all be taken care of when LL secedes from this oppressive union.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
We'd make so much more money that way
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
I'd love for LL to function on a Graham-made box
JI - May 12, 2009
All I make are robots and buildings
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Like the Megazord?
JI - May 12, 2009
No
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Mega-Dragonzord?
JI - May 12, 2009
No
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
It's just so boxy it could be a robot and a building at the same time
JI - May 12, 2009
and it runs on music!
JI - May 12, 2009
.
Fin - May 12, 2009
Rec'd for Power Rangers Nostalgia
I loved that show in 5th grade. Funny how stupid it is in retrospect.
appleshampoo - May 13, 2009
That's VOLTRON!
d0nkey - May 13, 2009
I must have those :o
BrettJMiller - May 13, 2009
That would be a very bad building
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Not if it could move and shoot missiles like in the show
JI - May 12, 2009
There would be minimal fire escapes/daylighting
I don’t think you are thinking this through enough
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
MISSLES!
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
Wouldn't get it through DPD
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
I thought you jumped and yelled "aye-yah" and you were out
JI - May 12, 2009
Turns out we don't live in Texas
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
I love Johjima!
CapSea - May 12, 2009
Angel Grove is not in Texas
JI - May 12, 2009
Can you make one
that would be an anti-yunibot?
jimmylauderdale - May 12, 2009
Yes but I would be lazy and just have it shoot everything that moved
So that wouldn’t be very useful unless somehow I flipped the programming completely and turned it on whenever the opposition hit ground balls to short.
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
If it shoots everything that moves it probably wouldn't do much good against Yuni.
Aaron Campeau - May 12, 2009
"So that wouldn’t be very useful unless somehow I flipped the programming completely and turned it on whenever the opposition hit ground balls to short."
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Like I ever understand anything you say.
Aaron Campeau - May 12, 2009
I bet you understand it if he said aluminum
JI - May 12, 2009
Al-you-min-eee-um?
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
al-lim-min-eee-um
JI - May 12, 2009
lum
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Al-lim-min-eee-um-lum?
That’s just ridiculous
Robert Lintott - May 12, 2009
I fully admit my ears aren't the greatest
JI - May 12, 2009
Either that or I sub consciously Americanized it
JI - May 12, 2009
I just cut and paste your opinions into my own comments and change the spelling where applicable.
Aaron Campeau - May 12, 2009
I don't have opinions because I get all my opinions from the blogosphere
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
uh oh
Aaron Campeau - May 12, 2009
Angola?
Matthew - May 12, 2009
It's non-time travel predestination paradox
JI - May 12, 2009
Of course it would
knowing the only way to stay alive was by being still, Yuni would still swing away.
jimmylauderdale - May 12, 2009
?
Matthew - May 12, 2009
They're the only ones who consistently give us trouble and I'm pretty sure it's because I called them all retards once
Jeff Sullivan - May 12, 2009
Or maybe it's because they're retarded
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
I must say, they've presented a compelling counter argument.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
You called them all retards because they were massively trolling.
Aaron Campeau - May 12, 2009
/retarded
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
Shocking
JI - May 12, 2009
I didn't say I felt bad about it
Jeff Sullivan - May 12, 2009
I was questioning cause and effect.
Aaron Campeau - May 12, 2009
Eh
There are baseball fans from elsewhere who enjoy your writing. It isn’t useful to just hop to opponents’ sites just to get into junior miss combat.
Ed Coffin - May 13, 2009
I'll say
Jeff Sullivan - May 13, 2009
Go back to not commenting
Dewey N - May 13, 2009
I can't decide if I want to watch us or the hockey game tomorrow
Jeff Sullivan - May 13, 2009
Hockey
Jarrod Washburn
Graham MacAree - May 13, 2009
But...he's good this year!
Fin - May 13, 2009
No work so tomorrow will be drinking/hockey/poutine day!
Robert - May 13, 2009
LLLJ
Graham MacAree - May 13, 2009
Dear Jounal
Suck on my cock.
Robert - May 13, 2009
Yes except that's more of something you would like and not an insult
JI - May 13, 2009
I'd make a "nobody else is going to" joke
but I’ve decided not to.
Matthew - May 13, 2009
Very big of you
JI - May 13, 2009
People often comment about the size of my character.
Matthew - May 13, 2009
People often make comments about the size of Robert, too
seattlebruin - May 13, 2009
I'm a fucking mastodon bitch.
Robert - May 13, 2009
They're called mastodon cows dumbass
Graham MacAree - May 13, 2009
If we're still talking about the Power Rangers that means your short , black, and fat.
JI - May 13, 2009
... not that there's anything wrong with that
(apart from being short)
Graham MacAree - May 13, 2009
Like your one to talk
JI - May 13, 2009
Gotta compensate somehow
Robert - May 13, 2009
Actually it appears as though you did albeit in a clever backhanded sort of way.
Well done
Aaron Campeau - May 13, 2009
Nobody else is going to
Graham MacAree - May 13, 2009
Papercuts =(
CapSea - May 13, 2009
What?
How is that a decision?
Matthew - May 13, 2009
Like I was serious
Looks like I’ll be writing about a game I didn’t watch!
Jeff Sullivan - May 13, 2009
I don't see why you don't just write a Caps-Pens recap.
Except dibs!
Matthew - May 13, 2009
I'd read it
Extra points for using Mariners names for the losing team so we think we can understand it
Robert Lintott - May 13, 2009
I'll watch it for you.
JI - May 13, 2009
gif it so I can watch later
Jeff Sullivan - May 13, 2009
My computer can't take that and I just remembered it's a 5.00 start
JI - May 13, 2009
I know of a trio of people who would love to write about it for you!
Dewey N - May 13, 2009
I like how you arranged us by real life height
Thankfully it’s not to scale otherwise some posters that don’t have the best vision might have missed out on the joke.
Robert - May 13, 2009
Game sevens are usually gay
So I’d go with a split screen
JI - May 13, 2009
It's LL's other quiter
Robert - May 13, 2009
*Counting J/M as the same person
Robert - May 13, 2009
I'm upset I thought of this joke but was to angry to post at the time
JI - May 13, 2009
This is the greatest thread after a loss in quite awhile.
seattlesundevil - May 12, 2009
So...
Good game guys. Better luck tomorrow.
Gdawg - May 12, 2009
This thread is very angry.
CapSea - May 12, 2009
fuck you
Aaron Campeau - May 12, 2009
I'll angry you.
Matthew - May 12, 2009
So's your face
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
I hear people who do cocaine get angry
Graham MacAree - May 12, 2009
They get angry
when they do all their cocaine
jimmylauderdale - May 13, 2009
Yeah those things
Robert - May 13, 2009
HEY!
Saying Matthew looks like Dane Cook is a bannable offense, asshole. If you want to be such a troll, email him directly.
CapSea - May 13, 2009
Josh Hamilton did steroids?
Jeff Sullivan - May 13, 2009
Michael Young does cocaine?
Graham MacAree - May 13, 2009
Ashley Young does failure?
Matthew - May 13, 2009
Aston Villa
did choke this year. We are talking EPL, right?
jimmylauderdale - May 13, 2009
Ashley Young?
Willie Mays Haze - May 13, 2009
No just fertility drugs.
JI - May 13, 2009
Manny being Mammary!
Robert Lintott - May 13, 2009
For his whiskey dick, since he was an alcoholic.
Teej - May 13, 2009
LOL
Maybe we should all drink a little less coffee.
Right Guard - May 13, 2009
No chatspeak
Jeff Sullivan - May 13, 2009
Please refrain from using chatspeak on LL
Graham MacAree - May 13, 2009
Maybe he was just abbreviating Lookout Landing.
Fin - May 13, 2009
Sorry I guess I should have know that.
It’s kind of late and I forget the rules sometimes. Not saying this thread isn’t worth staying up for.
Right Guard - May 13, 2009
I don't even get it
JI - May 13, 2009
You guys seem rather worked up for it being 12:15 AM.
Right Guard - May 13, 2009
The only time I drink coffee is that one morning a year I'm stuck eating breakfast at Burger King and I'd rather have a cold frappachino then a 6 oz children's apple juice.
JI - May 13, 2009
BK is the only time I will slum enough to drink orange juice
Robert - May 13, 2009
I never even go that low
OJ is gross
JI - May 13, 2009
Well that's just crazy talk.
Aaron Campeau - May 13, 2009
It tastes like Sunny-D and toothpaste blended
JI - May 13, 2009
If you brush your teeth it will taste better
oc - May 13, 2009
Are you talking about OJ in general or BK OJ?
Aaron Campeau - May 13, 2009
All OJ
JI - May 13, 2009
Well that's just crazy talk.
Aaron Campeau - May 13, 2009
I apologize in advance if this is a dead meme
Inkara1 - May 13, 2009
I'm not OJ's ex wife or her boyfriend so I think I'm ni the clear
JI - May 13, 2009
Are you in the clear in order to cover up the cream?
Inkara1 - May 13, 2009
I already used this here, but I think it applies here.
Fin - May 13, 2009
With all the cocaine I feel this is just begging for Jeff to turn us to Club LL
Robert Lintott - May 13, 2009
Club LL is hanging out with Sean Green
and the two are never coming back.
Matthew - May 13, 2009
My apologies... I couldn't remember for sure
Won’t mention it again.
Robert Lintott - May 13, 2009
This is something that I am sad about.
I will still cherish all the fond memories.
Fin - May 13, 2009
No Matthew, the one who is hanging out with Sean Green is The Man. I can understand how you forgot seeing as how it has been a while since Jeff last updated the series but when he gets around to it I'm sure it will be worth the wait
Dewey N - May 13, 2009
Wow, this thread died in a hurry.
Fin - May 13, 2009
Wow, I think I've missed a lot over the past few hours.
Heydude - May 13, 2009
Well this was fun to read after the fact
appleshampoo - May 13, 2009
Well that was a pleasant surprise.
Mariner John - May 13, 2009
I see that a chart thread is 500+ comments, so I figure there had to be some sort of discussion/trolling/awesome or horrible event.
And it’s LSB being whiny bitches. I’m sorry I missed this thread.
Goose - May 13, 2009
Also, holy crap how did Vargas keep the Rangers to one run?
Goose - May 13, 2009
Vargas
This is as good an explanation as any.
ThundaPC - May 13, 2009
Yep.
Damn my shitty work schedule. Cocaine IS funny and I’ll bet Hamilton would agree if he was being candid.
Big Jared - May 13, 2009
I don't understand how you act like a whiny bitch after you win.
But it happened.
BrettJMiller - May 13, 2009
This was beautiful
pdb - May 13, 2009
LL is an
“infested whorehouse.”
Those coke jokes sure hit the spot, haha.
redwolf75 - May 13, 2009
I find it amusing that apparently we have no intelligent baseball discussion here
despite one of our mods being a THT writer and another one inventing a pitching metric that’s being used across SBN now
seattlebruin - May 13, 2009
Jeff is neat too
Robert - May 13, 2009
I, for one, can't believe Matthew and Graham decided to mod him given his clearly inferior baseball knowledge.
JI - May 13, 2009
I think it's more because he had a lot of spare time on his hands and they couldn't be assed to do the recaps on their own.
Robert - May 13, 2009
What???
I could have sworn that Jeff started this site.
Right Guard - May 13, 2009
This was sarcasm. Jeff did indeed found Lookout Landing.
Decatur - May 13, 2009
I thought it was Devin.
JI - May 13, 2009
Who is Devin?
I hear a lot of names get referenced here but they don’t seem to post anymore. How long has LL been around for?
Right Guard - May 13, 2009
I think it started in 1807 but I've been known to get my facts wrong before
pdb - May 13, 2009
A long time.
Lookout Landing’s first post.
Leone for Third.
Decatur - May 13, 2009
The LL archives are my job and I am doing a fine job by myself.
Robert - May 13, 2009
This is correct
seattlebruin - May 13, 2009
You're not much in to jokes, are you?
JI - May 13, 2009
My bad. Trying to look out for the new guy.
I actually attempted a joke at the bottom of the page, lame as I may seem.
Decatur - May 13, 2009
I saw that and gave it a hearty laugh.
Thanks for helping me with my baby steps.
Right Guard - May 13, 2009
Yes but when Robert and I do our usual sarcastic responses
it allows Jeff to scold us and look like the good cop.
JI - May 13, 2009
I see from pdb's post that this thread has taken a joking turn
but my original question was meant to be serious.
Right Guard - May 13, 2009
Apologies for the derail
but Decatur’s two links should tell you all you need to know.
pdb - May 13, 2009
I avoid mocking Devin because he has unlimited access to guns.
Robert - May 13, 2009
Matthew and Graham could have all the guns they want
if they only wanted to
(just not legally)
JI - May 13, 2009
If Matthew and Graham had guns that means I would have easy access to guns.
Robert - May 13, 2009
Oh that makes sense.
When did Matthew and Graham come in?
Right Guard - May 13, 2009
Graham snuck in through the doggy door.
R.J. Anderson - May 13, 2009
Sounds dirty
.Taylor - May 13, 2009
Fantastic.
royalcurve - May 13, 2009
Actually, Coach Owens was the original creator of the site.
His first post (one about the twists and turns of Jarrod Washburn’s social life) was so phenomenal that he quit and took a job with ESPN.
.Taylor - May 13, 2009
Matthew's helpful tip for the day:
Don’t be a blog commenter version of Carlos Mencia.
Matthew - May 13, 2009
[Insert racist comment here]
.Taylor - May 13, 2009
While I cannot make an informed comment on any infestation here,
I can say that no one is giving it up for free from my experience.
Sec 108 - May 13, 2009
.
Oh really?
seattlebruin - May 13, 2009
Let me clarify, I am not getting it for free from anyone.
Sec 108 - May 13, 2009
I bet Jeff wants a blog war on his hands.
You should be happy LSB commenter hate this place. It means we’re doing something right.
JI - May 13, 2009
A blog war would be the whitest thing we've ever done
Jeff Sullivan - May 13, 2009
Just make sure to throw in lots of star trek and monty python references.
pdb - May 13, 2009
All giffed.
Decatur - May 13, 2009
Star Trek was one of the blackest shows on tv at one point
JI - May 13, 2009
.
?
pdb - May 13, 2009
Roots!
Decatur - May 13, 2009
Reading Rainbow was whiter than jean shorts
abender20 - May 13, 2009
Darn tootin.
royalcurve - May 13, 2009
Whiter than a blog vacation?
Robert - May 13, 2009
Black people have access to computers too you hatemongerer
JI - May 13, 2009
not in texas they dont lol
Jeff Sullivan - May 13, 2009
only use chatspeak with animated emoticons
pdb - May 13, 2009
No chatspeak, please capitalise and use apostrophes correctly
seattlebruin - May 13, 2009
I could've sworn we only had one British Asian here
Jeff Sullivan - May 13, 2009
People change
seattlebruin - May 13, 2009
This would have been way better as "In my defence, people change"
seattlebruin - May 13, 2009
Like that combination is even possible
Next you’re going to tell me there are British African Americans
JI - May 13, 2009
There was a guy in the Ocean's movies that was that.
Robert - May 13, 2009
Or white African Americans
seattlebruin - May 13, 2009
I saw one of those on a bus ride to Pullman.
He was actually half and half though.
Robert - May 13, 2009
"One of those"!
royalcurve - May 13, 2009
That would be me.
My dad is from Africa, my mom is from L.A.
Fin - May 13, 2009
me too, it is just that the African part has been bred down over the years.
Sec 108 - May 13, 2009
What exactly is considered chatspeak on Lookout Landing?
Right Guard - May 13, 2009
LOL, kthx, +1, haha, ur, u, etc.
probably try to avoid abbreviations, too (w/r/t, w/e, b/c, etc.)
seattlebruin - May 13, 2009
I choose to laugh at the etc. as if it were a clever joke
Jeff Sullivan - May 13, 2009
Thanks!
seattlebruin - May 13, 2009
Asians aren't always clever you racist son of a bitch
Graham MacAree - May 13, 2009
They're almost as funny as Seattle/coffee jokes
pdb - May 13, 2009
Texas takes pride in its whorehouses.
Decatur - May 13, 2009
That's a porn star mustache hall of fame entry if ever there was one
bless you Burt Reynolds.
pdb - May 13, 2009
He also has a hall of fame laugh.
royalcurve - May 13, 2009
I still don't get how coffee and Nirvana jokes are supposed to offend Seattle fans
Coffee and Nirvana are awesome.
Jeff Sullivan - May 13, 2009
And I've never even lived in Seattle
Jeff Sullivan - May 13, 2009
It's kind of like how every reference to Southern California has to involve traffic and/or Hollywood
seattlebruin - May 13, 2009
But traffic and Hollywood are bad.
Matthew - May 13, 2009
It would be like me saying
“Ooooh, you’re from San Diego? Why don’t you go enjoy your beaches! amirite?!? lulz”
What kind of insult is that?
A stupid kind.
Matthew - May 13, 2009
So in reality it's the opposite
Jeff Sullivan - May 13, 2009
Well you're too busy enjoying your fabulous craft beer scene to notice!
haha, zing!
Matthew - May 13, 2009
Low blow, ass
seattlebruin - May 13, 2009
Personally I would trade Seattle's scene for Port Brewing and Pizza Port
Robert - May 13, 2009
But there's no traffic or Hollywood in San Diego
my uncle always asks what it’s like to live so close to Hollywood and how I deal with the traffic when San Diego really has neither
seattlebruin - May 13, 2009
Yes, I realize that
but that’s still a different kind of stupid. That’s ignorant stupid (applying a stereotype that doesn’t fir the particular region) rather than retarded stupid (using good particularities about the region as an insult)
Matthew - May 13, 2009
Good San Diego jokes would mention how a red-tagged house on a postage-stamp lot would still cost $750,000.
Inkara1 - May 13, 2009
and something about fish tacos, the zoo, and surfing
pdb - May 13, 2009
rec'd for fish tacos
JI - May 13, 2009
Fish tacos are magnificent
royalcurve - May 13, 2009
...
…
…
JI - May 13, 2009
You heard me.
royalcurve - May 13, 2009
I have a difficult time believing you could make this comment innocently
so therefore I will enjoy it on it’s own merit
JI - May 13, 2009
Or how this isn't true either
seattlebruin - May 13, 2009
Houses are cheap here now
Jeff Sullivan - May 13, 2009
As long as you want to live south of the 94 or in Vista
seattlebruin - May 13, 2009
But there is much more awesome here than Coffee and Nirvana.
Much more.
Fin - May 13, 2009
Oh, I don't know if it's INFESTED.
royalcurve - May 13, 2009
Infested with a terminal case of AWESOME
pdb - May 13, 2009
Is that why it burns when I tinkle?
abender20 - May 13, 2009
I have some pills for that, I'll have to rummage around the bottom of my purse.
royalcurve - May 13, 2009
Wait, no I don't.
royalcurve - May 13, 2009
Being awesome hurts
abender20 - May 13, 2009
You'd know.
royalcurve - May 13, 2009
This has been the greatest thread I have ever read here
d0nkey - May 13, 2009
You need more exposure to the Golden Age of LL then
seattlebruin - May 13, 2009
Most people do.
royalcurve - May 13, 2009
Well I will look forward to the next golden thread then.
I just loved how it went from HEY A COCAINE JOKE!
To a meme(?)
To a dead meme all in one thread.
That was wonderful. And reading the comments linked to LSB was just icing on the cake
d0nkey - May 13, 2009
We're a bunch of meanies
.Taylor - May 13, 2009
OK, who's messing with Wikipedia again?
seattlebruin - May 13, 2009
I see nothing in that entry that indicates tampering or incorrect information
pdb - May 13, 2009
It's just awful writing
Graham MacAree - May 13, 2009
Must have been written by an Asian
or an engineer.
OR MAYBE BOTH
seattlebruin - May 13, 2009
like there's any such mythical creature
pdb - May 13, 2009
.
3/4
seattlebruin - May 13, 2009
yeah whatever
he claims to be an expert on biomechanics and yet I’ve never seen his work featured on Driveline Mechanics.
pdb - May 13, 2009
I wish.
royalcurve - May 13, 2009
well, it is wikipedia after all
pdb - May 13, 2009
Muahahaha.
royalcurve - May 13, 2009
I came over here to apologize
for linking this thread at LSB last night. It can be fun to revel in the misery of others, I guess, but mainly I was just pointing out what I find to be a tired joke (although I personally felt that putting the psycho-‘dilla soul eater on there more than made up for it…). I never intended for the trolls to come out like they did. Naive in hindsight, obviously. Anyway, I’m not going to apologize after all. Because in the years of lurking on here, this has turned out to be one of the more entertaining threads I’ve seen. In fact, I take full credit for it.
Also, I’ve never posted here, and probably won’t in the future (what with the divergent rooting interests and all), so I better take this opportunity to say great job to Jeff, Matthew, Graham, and the rest of the folks here, this community is awesome. I read it almost daily during the season.
bhudson - May 13, 2009
There may be more good over at LSB than I had previously believed
Graham MacAree - May 13, 2009
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