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Lookout Landing

7/27: Open Game Thread, Part 2

And we're losing now.

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Go home, maple syrup drinkers!
Brewers lose 14-5

Washburn! Washburn!

You think that loss is going to increase the chances of a trade?
You think your family loves you?
If anything that trade is now more unlikely than before.
Wow, Melvin told you that?
OK, my bad.

It seems to me that that trade is now more unlikely than before.

His common sense told him that. As I would hope it would any other sane person.
Today's loss probably lowers their playoff odds by less than 2%

And that is even granting the front office credit for evaluating them properly.

I think a 14-6 loss to the nationals

is a little more discouraging to a front office than your run of the mill 4-3 loss to the average teams of the world.

Try to remember that you are wrong
I'm sorry do you watch the brewers?

I’ve watched just about every game. They’ve progressively gotten worse since about early June. They are accelerating in a negative direction. I am not nor do I think anyone else is claiming to know what Doug Melvin is thinking. But when you watch their games and follow them, it’s been quite evident for several weeks to resonable brewer fans that the team is not a buyer.

Yeah. Why don't you put down your spreadsheet and watch the game, Graham?
I don't watch the Brewers, but unlike you I do pay attention to how sane front offices operate.
Fair enough.

You know more than I do about front offices. But common sense is not specific to GM’s and stat heads and you don’t have to be a dick to disagree.

.

That looks warm and crunchy. Mind if I join you?
Common sense is generally retarded which is why it is called common
Passive dickishness apparently is a-OK though
My apologies.
Or their good start put them in a position where they can absorb a bad month
Or maybe they'll see that as further proof that they need a SP.

Point being, you do not know and it would help to avoid speaking like you do if you do not.

Because...

blowouts are worth more than one game.

They're in on both the WC and the division
If anything, watching another of their starters get lit up should add some urgency to get a starter.
I know, right
I can't tell you how excited I am for the Kazmir/Carpenter/Harden/Sheets/Bedard rotation.
You forgot Mark Prior
Fuck and yes
And Randy Johnson!
YES YES YES

Two #51s

Jeff Francis?
Mark Mulder from three years ago
So is Swedish, they just laid foundation on a new wing
People have been talking like the Brewers were out of it, in the same sort of position as us

so I always forget that they only around 3 games out.

Rod Fucking Barajas did not just go deep of of Felix right?

Rod Barajas? Are you serious?

Whenever we tie the game Felix unties against the next batter

Fun!

I don't want to see Jeter.
I was going to make a comment about the bottom
Let's hear it
I forget
Figures
It's wasn't a Washburn joke
I expect better from you.
Short memory
What's a 1 piece bikini?
Potentially awesome.
Rod Barajas has an extremely square head.
Yeah it's not like they have tits
What a weird place for this to show up.
Jeff is the worst GT moderator of all time
Not for my purposes!
Upon this, I agree.

Also, “have not speaker to you” ?

My coworker pointed this out and yet I still missed that
There have been a lot of HR's hit here the last few days
Meteorological effects related to the hot weather?
I AM SO BORED
Beer
It made me sleepy
More beer!
I feel like if I don't at least put up a chart someone will yell at me
Matthew will do it and people cant tell the difference except for the people that get off on bugging you
You can handle the entire rest of the season with a flatline
You could let me put it up and then people will yell at me for not being you?
Or they wouldn't notice
CLEMENT HOMERED TWICE YOU TWAT
I don't write about non-prospects
I can't beLLieve he wasn't interviwed
Hard to interview someone with your mouth full
Graham doesn't do interviews
That would be the cutest
I want Graham to interview Rob Johnson

minus =

Subject line asshole
Matthew I am going to need you to unban me in a minute
It's so he can't moderate it
So thats how it works, good to know
This is the worst
Why is Washburn still here?
Tomorrrow is a tuesday

just saying…

I'm bored too
Tell you what

Let’s order a pizza and HAVE SOME FUN!

Stuffed Crust Pizza jumped the shark
Stuffed Crust Pizza is the shark
Should we give him the pizza back?

WHAT?!?! NO!!!!

I'll give you five dollars to overact that in person
Nothing's better than some sloppy wet pizza
ROB JOHNSON IS HERE FOR YOU JEFF
I seriously want to hurt the idiots chanting

“Let’s go Blue Jays”

Deception!
Does UZR count baiting baserunners
Rob Johnson...
Rob Johnson is somehow turning the fact that he can't catch the damn ball into something useful
It's the defensive equivalent of the Ronny Doublebunt
He's probably doing it on purpose

Tricks the runners into going

I'm looking forward to this theory being established alongside his CERA.
I thought we were batting just now...

wow…

Did the homerun give it away?
Rob Johnson is a ninja

He has given opponents the illusion he can’t catch the ball just so he can gun down everyone with a rope a dope

Branyan's been trying to do that all season
Saundermania!
SAUNDERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What is that, three strides for him to first base?
Get that one you old fart!
Saunders is going to fit right in
Saunders is a ninja too

Haha

HE SHOULD HAVE A HOME RUN
FUCK CHRIS GIMENEZ
Steal a base!
Is Saunders good Canadian or bad Canadian?
The non-French kind.
Oh God we're doing it again
"Another good idea."
Should've stolen that base Saunders.
Saunders is so tall

he could trip and steal second

Bill Brasky isn't tall enough to do that
This game is getting repetitive.
Take that Mauer!
We are tied
We're still down one
Good god Guti has no hair on his upper lip!

he’s making a conscious effort to look like his bobblehead!

GUTI GUTI GUTI GUTI GUTI GUTI GUTI GUTI GUTI GUTI GUTI GUTI GUTI
woohoo goooooch!
Gootiedez!!!!!!!
FELIX HUG PLEASE

oh wait. he’s on base.

That would be very entertaining, though.
Yay two-hole hitter!
This game is actually kind of entertaining.
Woo hoo!

Gutz with the big hit. Saunders scores!

FRABKLIN IS A STUD
Is Frabklin like the Shrabster?
Saunders is so adorable, I just want to nibble on him.
Saunders does some weird thing with his hands when running
This is 3 more runs than I expected out of this lineup.
Franklin is responsible almost everything good and wonderful in this world.
Im growing tired of Sims pronouncing every part of Guti's name

Goot-E-Air-Ez

Someone's got a man-crush.
For the last time

Gutierrez requested that.

I don't even notice
Probably because you are around people that know how to pronounce Latin American names
Seriously I have never noticed him saying Gutierrez
I hear ya brotha
I didn't until people started whining about it
Its pretty bad...

I think he tries to hard.

Because i've been here long enough to be a part of that specific discussion
This comes up literally every other day
This is how Gutierrez told him to pronounce it for the eleven billionth time
Form a line with nobody else.
I NEVER NOTICED UNTIL GAMETHREADS
How else would you pronounce it?
The American way because of [deleted, really mean personal insults]
Goo-dee-air-is
That's how I thought it was said.
It's a trick he wants you to think he's a caucasian
Gary Payton could do more damage
Cause he's black yes we get it you are a racist
Griffey is also a brother
The PC term is negbros
GRIFFEY TIME MOTHERFUCKERS
That went well.
He was better when he was good
Griffey is no longer enjoyable to watch in the slightest.
Shelton is too ugly to have an irrational affection for.
I am a fan.
I am too, but it's not a whirlwind affair like with Gutierrez.
I hear if you pick him up by the ears it don't hurt so much
Have you seen Jeff Clement
PeopLLe only think Clement is sexy because Graham does
He is a glorious stallion you fool
He does not prance
How can a stallion be a stallion if he doesn't prance?
Stallions run and stud. Prancing is not in their contract.
John Carlson prances and his cock is more than capable of studding my tonsils in.
Some of us don't think Clement is sexy.
I thought he was sexy when he was a highly touted catcher and not a busting DH
Chris Shelton is busty
I have an irrational affection for him

I have this weird problem with redheads. :/

Griffey:

Ewwwwwwwwwwww...
This is the worst jpeg of the night
That looks like tuna
Giant squid?
When do we crucify Mike Sweeney upside down?
After a few hours you could pop his head like a balloon
They left that out of the bible.
SINGLES! SINGLES! SINGLES! SINGLES!

It’s singles night tonight, apparently. I thought that was the USSM/LL get-together.

It's August 8, I believe, so yes.
Can you smoke in Safeco?
In designated smoking areas.
THERE AREN'T ANY
THEY SAY IT IS INSIDE BUT I CAN SEE THE SKY AND THERE ARE NO WINDOWS
SHITSHITSHIT!
Can you not smoke on the terrace by the water in the 300-level?

Granted, you can not see that game from there either.

No.

You used to be able to but you can’t since the indoor smoking ban passed because clearly the terrace is indoors.

If you want to smoke and aren't sitting on the first level you are going to miss at least half an inning
What a crock of crap.
Steaming!
It is probably not steaming

because that would imply some sort of smoke

*heat
That is not funny at all.

God.

How can a person drink beer and watch baseball from the bleachers without smoking?
Quite easily.
It's more the total bullshit reasoning that pisses me off than anything.
I shoot up instead
Robert could do lines off the small of Qwest's back
If you squit you can see the new wide screen monitors from across the way
In the stadium? I did not know that, I thought they had to stop allowing it
THEY DIDN'T THEY JUST WANTED AN EXCUSE
It was nice, you could watch sunsets while bathing your cells in nicotine.

Christ I really want a smoke now

Just do some more qualudes
Jeez doc, the guy on the corner is out can I get a script?
Just find something with a Mr. Yuk sticker on it and huff some.
Your insurance provider is going to love you
The easiest way to cut down on the cost of health care is to just offer up what's under the sink.
The Dr. is in!
At least your bedside manner is probably terrific. Right?
Shut the fuck up and huff some of this glue.
Jesus christ what degree mill did you graduate from anyway?
Miguel Batista bestowed upon my my degree.
me my
And your poetic touch.
How's that working out anyway? Subpoenaed yet?
Apparently you can't extradite people to the DR for fictitious crimes
Maybe he'll just use his poetic license and kill you
It might be heating up soon. I told my dad that story while we were watching Tits warm up at the game Friday about 10 feet from him. Maybe he heard.
Nope, but they have in/out so keep your ticket stub. They scan the bar code
Rob Johnson would have moved out of the way for that split shot
I love Hannahan's swing

If he ever made contact it would be pure sex.

I was trying to figure out who Romero looks like this whole time...

LL Cool J

This lineup has four runs in five innings
And Felix has three runs allowed :(
Boy should your face be red
Hannahan has sort of a Pat Borders thing going.

Minus a few decades worth of sun and chaw, of course.

WHY DOESN'T HE JUMP MORE
Wow nice camerawork guys
We have 10 hits. All singles.

Suck it, Angels.

A new day, the Angels way.
Extras!
We're still winning dipshit
My mlbtv is ahead >:(
ROB JOHNSON COCK FACE
THIS IS MAY FIRST ALL OVER AGAIN
Felix hates leads.
This is not a rivalry you idiots

who the hell has a baseball team flag

Every team?
I believe you are correct

sir

Rob Johnson continues not to be able to catch the ball or block the plate...
You have no idea how to use that big piece of leather on your hand, do you Rob?
It's good for those oocasional naps in the clubhouse.
It's Felix sucks day
I am unsure of my feelings towards Felix's facial hair configuration.

But I’m pretty sure I don’t like all these runs.

It had an odd chin line the other day, which is fortunately now gone.
His face is a bit round for that, I think.

God, I’m actually dreading tomorrow night’s game. How sad.

Well well well...
Rather than applying the tag, Rob Johnson decided to re-adjust his athletic supporter.
Time to shave your chinny chin chin, Felix
*chinn
How would he feel about that?
As much as we need to trade for a shortstop.

Trading for a catcher wouldn’t be too bad of an idea.

Yes it would
I hope Adam Moore is good at the things catchers are paid to be good at.
Not really, but he can hit.
Call up Moore and be done with it.

At least he can hit.

Because Kenji/Rob Johnson is working out well?

I know Moore is on the way, but it would be nice to get another half decent catcher in there.

If Moore is ready by 2010 and we are out of the race, why?
Anything to replace Kenji/Rob Johnson.

Just like Hannahan, he’s not the future at 3B, but he was a cheap upgrade over Woodward.

What is the point?
Wieters for Bedard
Mmmmm. Bedard.
I'll just drop it, sorry.

It was mostly game thread emotion, I can’t stand Rob Johnson.

If you hadn't noticed, the season is essentially over. Adam Moore is waiting.
I miss Beltre
Boy are we terrible
Ahahahahahahahahahaha
We need a shortstop Clap Clap Clap Clap Clap
The Mariners are first in sucking
We need a shortstop.
I HATE THIS TEAM FUCK THE TAINT BACK INTO THEIR ASS EXCEPT FOR FELIX I WILL DO THAT FOR YOU GUYS
JJ HAR-DY CLAP CLAP CLAPCLAPCLAP
Next time we tie the game please pull Felix
And put in Batista?
How I had longed for 2008
ITS JOE FUCKIN ENGLAND
Jesus this inning is irritating
They are doing the same thing to us as we were to them.
Yeah but that was us
Two outs, so what?
MOTHERFUCK, FELIX!!!!
I'm sorry, I should have said

Chinga tu madre.

Wait a sec

That’s not even right.
I love this discussion.

I CAN'T BELIEVE HOW UNDERPRIVILEGED I AM
I'm glad I didn't go to the bar to watch this.
Griffey hasn't homered since July 1st
How many gb in a row is this?
This inning:

Pop out
Groundball
Groundball
Walk
Line drive
Groundball
Groundball

You'd think Felix would just strike someone out
Well, the clubhouse can't complain if they do start trading.
The Jays are playing us at our own imitation of the Angel's game.
This is like 2007 all over again!
I was hoping for a walk and a Scutaro grand slam
Throw strikes you assbandit
DEATH SPIRAL

LETS GET THIS PARTY STARTED AHA

BURN THE TREE
AHAHAHAHA AHAHAHAHA
WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
What the HELL.
Them Cleveland guys were right about our defense
And them Taxas dudes, too.
Oh for fuck's sake.
Angels in Canada.
I think we'll still win this in extras
One weekend

One weekend is all the time it took for this to feel so normal again

It's just like riding a bike.
I don't know how to ride a bike
Samesies!
Thirdsies!
WHAT IS GOING ON
You knew this about me.
Can you swim?
Nope
Whoa.
I can stay afloat.

Good enough for me.

Good thing you can;t ride a bike to the lake, then.
They could film a reality show about your triathlon attempt
I bet he's big into guns
I'm thinking of a different triathlon
I can run in theory but watching me try to keep going would be entertaining enough.
If you learned the backstroke, you could theoretically smoke throughout.
Will you be my physician
With the other hand, you could be eating kettle chips!
You will have to keep yourself alive long enough for me to get through residency.
My grandmother smoked two packs a day for twenty-five years and drank a sixer of Miller Lite every day until the day she died.
She died when she was 84 by the way.

This wouldn’t be impressive if she had died in her 40s.

I was wondering if she did that from 0-25.
She was a bartender in a whorehouse!
I hope you were old enough to hear stories.
She didn't tell them but he sisters had big mouths.
Out of respect for your great aunts, I won't make the jokes I want to make.
They were a bunch of bithces except the crazy one that I never got to hang out with so go nuts
Once I've abstained, the mood is just ruined.
If true, this is the best grandma story I've heard in a long time.
I was gonna say...

“Well that’s nice. i hope she didn’t die at 52 from lung cancer and liver failure.

But she took up smoking at age 59?
Cough again.
I could probably still swim

but I haven’t been in a pool since high school.

How on earth were you a little kid without learning this?
PEOPLE FORGET
Was this one of the things that you forgot in a instant?
I remember everything that happened from before and during Lieutenant Labia
You sit on the seat.

You pedal.

I hadn't been on a bike in a decade and it took about five minutes to be comfortable again.

You’d figure it out.

Seriously?
It's the brain damage
You probably knew before the baseball hit you
No

I knew when I was a kid, grew up, figured out it was faggy, forgot, and never re-learned.

This is what happens when you go to college in a cold weather state.
I can rollerblade like a motherfucker
And that is somehow not faggy
That is SO MUCH FAGGIER than riding a bicycle
That was the joke
No you're gay
I'm sorry

I don’t know any gays who rollerblade. Either pick something gayer, or turn in your Gay Card.

We make gays carry ID cards now?
The original law was arm bands, but it was negotiated down.
With the pink triangle and all?
Let me know the truth.
We don't MAKE them, silly

It’s like a rite of passage – you just need poster board and a Bedazzler. Chuh!

Oh really?

huh.

Jeff has nice legs in that picture!
I like the little fan/sign.
I don't know that I should check it

It took me ages to find this discussion, for some reason my computer wasn’t interested in the back button actually working.

;

This is weird now

Is it now.
I like how my 10,000th comment was tonight. And it was

“oh, sandwiches.”

Way to excel, me.

Wake me up before you go go
I hated roller bladers on campus

except the guy who only had one roller blade and went barefoot, he was cool.

I'm telling pdb
Bikes are the tits knees and if they weren't so expensive I would ride them to tomorrowtown
We crash into parked cars?
Zip it the both of you.
If only we could have switched last weekend for the 2008 Oakland series
We'd be watching our #1 draft pick board a plane for Japan?
How much money do the Angels have coming off the books the offseason after this?
Clearly this is because of the Washburn trade talk
If Wash sucks tomorrow and does not get traded...
At least we traded for Holliday
I hope he pulls a Hancock
We wouldn't get draft picks >:(
You could still try to offer him arb and hope that Washington bites
ahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
What? He'll still move around better than Dunn.
So Felix's tRA for this game

is going to indicate something much different than the number of runs scored.

Brad is awfully defensive about the accuracy of the tracer there.
And about how it belongs to EQC
It is?
I mean it does?
No
I was trying to make a sarcastic joke there.

But yea, I don’t understand why it needs to be reminded so many times, unless EQC pays them more to do those little tidbits before the innings begins.

Come on Whitey
Sean White is much better at pitching than Felix Hernandez
The mini buffalo ranch commercial has grown on me. I love it now.
Jack in the Box is good at making commercials.
Those "spirit of youth" commercials on the radio really, really need to go away though
OH MY GOD THEY ARE FUCKING INFURIATING
They were clearly created by an old person.
In better news, Steppenwolf is coming to the EQC!
John Kay & Steppenwolf, you mean.
Mars Bonfire was a cool name
B-B-B-B-B-BAD
WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS??
So Rob Johnson, personal catcher, is doing just great right now.
His CERA has gone to shit today.
Bedard had a shitty start too.
Adding Insult to Injury

Were any of those balls hit hard? It seemed like they were almost all medium speed grounders. Why did the announcers keep making reference to Felix getting “tattooed?” Medium hard groundballs does not mean tattooed. They make everything worse.

There was one line drive. Everything else was fustrating bullshit.
He gave up two home runs,a deep sac fly, and multiple line drives. He wasn't sharp today at all.
The 6th was just a lot of grounders finding holes
I thought it was the 5th
Top of the 6th?
Oh were they just talking about the 6th?

In that case, yeah, that inning Felix was pitching pretty well and was just unlucky.

He got a ton of grounders.

Fangraphs has it as sixteen grounders, seven flyballs, and only two line drives. That’s 64% grounders and 8% line drives. Yeah, the two strike outs kinda sucked, but the one walk was good. Having two balls leave the yard sucked, but I don’t think that was too bad of a game. He certainly wasn’t “tattooed.”

Only 2 Ks, though.

Not a terrrible start, but a below average one.

I'll concede it was below average, but can someone tell that to all the old school douche bags I'm sick of listening to?
Who were you listening to?
Mike Blowers.
Wow, you would never see a walk like that in 2007.
Rob Johnson is a ninja

He just snuck up on 1st base

This is the worst
You think so?
I'm probably just letting my emotions get the better of me
There have to be worse things out there
6-4 Angels
They'll lose
They never lose
Why does Kemp hit 8th?
Because Joe Torre is a fucking genius
Alternatively because Ned Colletti is a genius

and wants to keep his cost low.

J. Martin hits like Willie Bloomquist
Good thing Carlos Santana is almost ready
Not if you trade Kershaw and Loney for Victor Martinez
Cliff Lee is a proven winner

Kershaw is just a kid.

Note

I will personally kick spit on Frank McCourt if they deal Kershaw. Loney is replaceable.

The best part is Martinez would play first
Can't stop Russ J.
Ned wouldn't dare displace another fan favorite at Catcher

even though the fans hate Russell now.

I heard the angels enjoy having penises put into their mouths.
you could say woodward sacrificed...

He sacrificed johnson so he could get on base

Rookie hazing.
My first comment is..WE Blow Nutsack Tonight
LOL
TOTALLY, D00D
dood!

Why does that poor penguin have peg legs?
Prinny dood!
I sense great things out of you
You're off to a great start with your username, first comment, and signature.

Have fun with the wolves.

What if it's Matthew testing us?
Paranoia! Awesome, that's like stage 3. Or something.
Our Win Expectancy *blows* nutsack tonight.
<3 Dave Sims.
You share an IP address with someone who goes by yuni4life
Your signature causes me to immediately dislike you
What a terrible first comment
Welcome to Lookout Landing!
I'm not a fan of Dave Sims either.

But just FYI, a handful of opinions are not allowed around here, dissing on Sims is near the top of the list.

It's allowed, it's just that everyone will tell you you're fucking crazy
Which is why you'd want to keep thoughts like that to yourself.
If your reasons for hating Sims weren't crazy we'd leave you alone.
If it's a legitimate diss you can diss him all day long.

Make sure it’s not something like “he’s not genuine”

HE DOESN'T READ BOARDERLINES HOMERUNS WELL!

I like Dave Neihaus though.

I can tell you're going to offer a lot of insight to the blog. Welcome!
This is going to be like the Virgin Mary getting an abortion
Is that like the boy who cried wolf?
The boy who cried wolf didnt save the world from a bunch of trouble
No Oscar...stay AWAY from the net...
Isn't his hat cute tonight?
my brother
Use the reply function
Well something runs in the family
Is it down syndrome
good catch frankie
Well, there you go.
REALLY GUTZ??
I HAVE NO SOUND!

WHY DO I HAVE NO SOUND!

What are you hoping to hear, exactly?
The nice commentary of Dave Sims.

Or just baseball sounds.

Like sounds that should come out of the TV when a baseball game is on.
Boy did we ever give up
WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON
Season Over.
uhhh could this night be any worse
Yes.
There is no floor.
ack gooch

So were almost to the all star break right?

That crash in the wall must've taken a toll on him.
This is the stupidest thing in the world.
I can't comprehend the things I'm seeing
I think some Evil Genius has an Evil Genius ray of some kind at the ballpark tonight .

He is causing slight tremors in the fabric of time.

You know.

Dr. Horrible!
It’s not a death ray or an icebeam.
That's so Johnny Snow
I think I know what I may doing shortly.
...

Italy is such a better choice
That would work too.
By the way, I wansn't here, how the fuck did Felix give up 7 runs?
Crappy command, crappy pitch selection, crappy luck.
Ninjas took his command of the strike zone

while he was getting gatorade

Single, HR, single, misplay, single, HR, single, single

Something to that affect

I am sure Jarrod Washburn won't mind being traded now.
Way to hustle.
Langerhans has that
Does Saunders have to stop at customs if he's trying to drive in a Mariner?
Langerhans is our last set of Griffey knees

the rest of them are our infield tonight

Langerhans would be a superior DH
We're going to give up 9+ runs for the fourth game in a row
Saunders has bad work ethic
No we went over this, he's a white guy
Bloody foreginers
He's white?
and Canadian.

They always hustle. It’s the lousy Russians that are all about showboating.

Just watch their ice-dancing.
I can't believe we're losing
Ten grand
My disbelief is genuine
I don't believe this
Your disbelief is unbelievable
Believe that
Buleedat. C'mon Fogel.
Both of us are white
Believe you me?
I hope that if I ever have a kid with a terminal disease,

and the Mariners send someone to visit him/her in the hospital, they send Bill Krueger.

How I would laugh that day!

I'd laugh it it was Ebola
This is wonderful.
I would laugh cause it would be almost time to get back to making babies
Remember like 4 days ago when everyone in baseball was talking about how great our pitching is?

Good times

I BET I KNOW WHAT HAPPENED TO THEM
I'm just glad we got all of our regression out of the way at once!
ERA! ERA! ERA!
It's called regression, you can learn about it by doing an internet search.
Try using the Google search engine

http://www.google.com

Alexie Ramierez's brethern came from outspace and are wearing our pitchers like body suits?
It is disheartening how those people

never seem to step back and ask themselves why, if our pitching was so good, it blew up all of a sudden and that perhaps there might be other explanations.

Washburn trade rumors, duh
We were doing just fine until Gutierrez turned up
Washburn hasn
hasn't* regressed yet, so obviously they will hold this up as an example of why we need to re-sign him
Funny you say that...

every talking head on the radio today was advocating signing Washburn to an extension because winning in 2010 is a high priority and clearly this team is close.

Because signing veteran pitchers did us wonders in 2008!
And you need his veteraniocity and ability to replicate this year's success in future years.
The bullpen wore down from overuse
If we had more guys like Washburn they wouldn't get so worn down
We can't even trust Felix to go out there every day and go 7 innings and win now. All we have is Washburn
We should have learned after 2007
That Felix Hernandez should go back to Cuba
Seattle is always streaky

Especially if you threaten to put us in the playoffs. Once we don’t have to fear taking the division anymore… we’ll be awesome again

That used to be the Seahawks problem!
I thought their problem was that they sucked.
They only suck in a row

They are goodin a row too.

Boy do I want to go gambling with you!
As long as it's your money we're playing with
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In case anybody is wondering this is a magiceye of Slurvey's father
Just wait until September right?
I am just so frustrated right now.
What the fuck what happened toi the sock puppet?
bellies the truth
Did somebody say "belies"?
Our playoff chances are deader than him
Yay Ichiro!
My stream is so far behind...
So how will the Mariners Angel their way to 4 runs this inning?
Why can't they just set the Bobblehead on a table?

Why do they need to pay some girl to hold it up?

She comes in the box too.
Not like she's good for anything else!
Yes she is...
SHE PROBABLY COULD SUCK DICK?
Like a bobblehead?
If that analogy works for you
Yes...

but goodly?

She is probably paid with that Bobblehead.
thats the rally fry girl

She was already paid

Well Whoopdy doo.
Griffey vs. a sidearming lefty. Let's play Guess the Outcome!
Defying expectation
Who will become team tickler if GRiffey doesn't come back???!!!
I hope it's Bedard so we can call him the French tickler
Saunders.
He's not French
They speak Frenchian in Canada.
Not in British COlumbia
In Holland they speak Hollandaise.
In Rand McNally they wear hats on their feet and hamburgers eat people.
Some places people juggle geese.
Goslings actually.
This whole team except Ichiro apparently has learned hopelessness.
Has Griffey retired yet?
He was just retired. Pay better attention.
So facebook is another place not to go to read comments on Mariners news.

In case anyone wanted to know.

I cannot believe Robert has not mentioned how J. Carlson is pitching.
He's too busy being angry at me.
This situation is unbelievable
I am afraid of posting pictures of dicks on work computer
Also this is the non-union version of him
Canada has different, but no less real, unions
maybe Ichiro can steal around the bases

and then back to first

Yay to false hope!
Wow we have 11 hits.
I thinkwe are setting up the woodward SLAM!
That was not a strike
Anyone know what Felix's tRA was for this start?
We're going to lose the next 14 games
History says only 9 or ten

then a 8 game win streak

So uh can we get rid of Washburn already?
If Washburn pitches tomorrow for the Mariners, I think I may lose it.
I would just be fucking baffled. We're about to be 8.5 back.
I expect that he will
It's cool, we'll get 'em tomorrow.
Just kidding we won't.
Does it even matter?
Perhaps Washburn will outduel Halladay and we'll be able to trade for Drabek and three other good prospects.
Don't tease me, you big silly man
Atta boy Teej.
Well good for Lincecum
15 strikeouts, that's some impressive stuff.
Eh, Dan Haren is better.
Is it possible to....

trade teams?

You can go root for the White Sox.
Cleveland and Kansas City did

They are entirely old mariners

Washburn stopping this losing streak will be the cherry on top of his shinyness.
Cito Gaston sounds like a petrol station.
Washburn almost looks sad
Why is Halladay smiling
Because he's an asshole.
He's illiterate
I would be happy to be leaving the shithole of Toronto.
The only good thing about Toronto is Canada's Wonderland
Soon to be far away from JP Riccardi's crazy
He's going to be on a contending team in the next couple days probably
He might like the city of Toronto

before tonight’s game i believe Felix and Tim Lincecum had the same E.R.A. and Felix had 1 more win..I wonder what the stats are going to look like tommorrow.
Felix 11-4 2.70 era
Timmy Lincecum 11-3 2.35?

Something entirely meaningless, I'm sure
And your point is?
Please obey the site rules to capitalize and use the subject line.

Also, pretty much nobody here cares about ERA or pitcher’s won-loss records.

ERA doesn't have punctuations but other than that you are golden
It does in The New York Times!
FAGGOT FINALLY CAUGHT ONE
I STILL HAVE NO SOUND! FUCK YOU VERIZON! I KNOW FIOS DOESN'T ADVERTISE SOUND, BUT I FEEL LIKE THATS PART OF TV!
That's odd, I've got sound.
It's just FSN too. It's obnoxious.
Ew, that was gross, the guy telling the ball girl

“Give it here, sweetie”.

That's for wearing a Jay's shirt to Safeco, numbnuts
Hey guys how's it going?
Eleven inches
Somebody's been taking their vitamins.
He's cutting it all off for Locks of Love
I'm packing Blyleven inches
I'd circle that.
*Oval
Not necessarily
More of a cylinder, really.
Sometimes I wonder how I come up with all this fresh material
I don't know, but you did a good job to Spahn a conversation on penis geometry.
Johnny Dickshot
So I don't know if it's been mentioned.

But Jimenez tried to steal a HR from Morales but it popped out and went over the wall for a HR. I don’t know if you’d like that because of Saunders, or hate it because fuck the Angels.

You better be fucking joking
Nope. It's in gameday if you can view that. Morales' 2nd HR.
GOD
I know, right?
I'm less lucky than minority children
I was going to talk about how awesome it is to root for a first place team but then I just saw Alfonso Soriano hit a walkoff gland slam

Why does every .260 hitter in the league and lower kill the mariners..cough Rod Barajas…Magglio Ordonez…Its like Tyronn Lue and the Blazers

Yes that is so insightful please share more of your wisdom with us.
Could you please use the subject line
You should let Matthew do this
He boxes people who talk back >:(
Cuz the gameplan says...

Don’t let the good hitters beat you

Ok, this is painful to the eyes.

1. Please use a subject line.
2. Batting Average isn’t a good stat to use, trying looking into wOBA.
3. It seems that being a good ballplayers isn’t a qualifier when succeeding against the Mariners.

Sorry if that came off as too rude.

HOLY SHIT YOU ARE FROM OREGON WHY DOES THIS NOT SURPRISE ME?
Oregon is so much cooler than Washington
Assholes are cooler than the outside world in this weather I agree
A TIMBERS FAN EH???
What price veteran leadership now?
And now the wave.
Happy happy Jays Fans!
Haha who came up with the idea of the wave is what I want to know
They must be so annoyed
CATCH THE FUCKING BALL RETARD
Another +9 run game for the opponent.
So when can we see Moore?
That pitch was almost a strike
Willingham hit two grand slams?
Why am I still watching this?
Because it's too hot to get up and change the channel?
Car wrecks are impossible to look away from
Because LL gets more interesting in times of despair?
Yeah both to left center saw the highlight when i changed the channel cause I Was pissed at the Mariners
Comment sense makes None why subject line used though so good
I can understand this
Regression is a bitch
3rd straight double-digit game!
I can't even work up any emotions over that. Rob Johnson has robbed me even of that.
Our titties are getting murdered by Canada.
Why didn't we trade for Octavio Dotel!?
butterednakedman is marinersin07
I was talking about Willingham's Grand Slams
USE THE SUBJECT LINE
AND BY THAT I MEAN REPLY FUNCTION

I’M A RETARD

I want to play Evony
Someone in SoCal please check in on Jeff and make sure he's okay.
THE TORONTO BLUE JAYS ARE BABY RAPERS!!!!
So, White is falling on his sword for the bullpen tonight.
That's awful nice of him

I guess…

Thermopylae!
This is funny if you look at it.
DFA'ing Wlad made the baseball gods mad at the Mariners.
Sure, that's what happened.
Now that we got our regression out of the way we can make a heroic run at the division
oh fuck I blew it
That isn't how it works....
Your shoelace is untied
By this I mean duck

It’s too hot for jokes dude

I'm not wearing shoes

Who’s the idiot now?!?!?

And there is something on your tie.
Good thing they can't do this 3 days in a row.

Shit.

What is that sound I hear?

Chants for the Blue Jays? I should have gone to the game…

All game long, "Let's go Blue Jays" Over and over again.
The picture of Scott Downs on Gameday says it all.
Holy hell the Indians have 4 runs on 15 hits.

Angels are maybe a bit lucky.

The Angels are silly gooses.
I hope all the Angels die in a mutual erotic asphyxiation accident.
What the fuck happened?
This game does not deliver the perverse sexual satisfaction that I crave
Perhaps we should turn this comment into a conversation about sexual fetishes
Foot fetishes
How does that work?
Who here likes burakke?
No politics
Rec'd for having the stones to post it.

I was going to but pussed out.

This is a conversation I am qualified to participate in.
One day I will find myself in a room with you and then you will regale me with stories
And somehow you're always around for them. Do you get like a bat signal?
Something like that.
Maicer wiggles his ears
He actually comes up to me and grabs my ears and wiggles them.
That's adorable!
Go stuff a crust
So that's why it tastes so sketchy
All I know is it's white and gooey in the center and that's only part of stuffed crust pizza I like
Meow.
A Pooch who liked cats would be a pretty weird fetish.
It would if your life was like that movie Crash.

And not the shitty one that won an Oscar because people that vote for Oscars like to give themselves handjobs. I mean the one with Jeff Goldblum.

I would give a movie about car-crash masturbation 14 Oscars before giving one to Paul Haggis' monstrosity.
But Ludacris learns from his mistakes!

Sandra Bullock gets less racist!

I'm usually not overly opinionated about movies.

I think about 80% of the films I see fall in the “yeah, it was solid, I might watch it again” category. Ten percent blow me away. And the other 10 percent are “Crash” and “Hustle & Flow.”

You've seen 20 movies?
Rec'd for math.
I consider it more of a genre than actually just the two movies.
Or whatever the hell it's about.

I read part of the book but haven’t seen Cronenberg’s film.

DVR pause

Half dozen folks looking miffed. Maybe I should be glad I didn’t go to the game.

I am sure Waka must be really frustrated now.

Alexei?
Wait,

what is the Alexei meme?

Alexie Rameriez is an Alien.
Aardsma Express time!
Stoney blogs

UPDATE 9:28 P.M.: Here’s some good news, Mariner fans. Joe Mauer went 0-for-4 tonight, and his average dropped from .363 to .358. Ichiro has three hits, and his average is up from .359 to .363 to take over the AL batting lead.

Other than that, another rotten night for the Mariners.

I actually find myself caring about batting average a little bit because I want Pujols to win a triple crown.

Because even though it’s stupid, Pujols deserves every accolade ever.

His worst ever season wOBA is over .400
I hope he allows a homerun here.
He needs to get it out of his system
Why is David Aardsma being dragged into this pile-up?

frown

He has to pitch sometime.
He hasn;t been in a game since the 23rd
The poor guy hasn't pitched in so long...
Just because someone's hungry

Doesn’t mean you feed them McDonalds. Grrr!

Never mind me, I’m just annoyed.

You do if they're going to starve to death and it's the only thing available
No

Not even then. I’d rather die.

Well, I guess he needs to throw something….

Seriously, I can't think of another reliever who hasn't been hit around in the last few days.

hmm…Corky?

He isn't with the team
Oh. That's probably why i haven't seen him.
Everyone has to take a turn

Fiddling with the suck knob.

Interesting terminology.
It's standard install on any sound board

Just ask a roadie.

Oh dear lord you just set them on a tee, don't you?
I am not 100% sure how to answer this

And even less sure that it’s directed at me…..

So I’m going to nod and say no.

Reread your comment but look for the multiple entendres.
You could also shrug and do the diagonal head movement.
I'm gonna take this door

It’s too hot to think that I might have just been subconsciously filthy.

And that makes me sad.

Managers always get dumb with closers on losing streaks
Ronny :(edeno shows us how pros do it!

HAHAHAHAHA

Jeff: Let's see if we can go the next 48 hours without using any form of the word "regress."

Can I at least declare that we’ve been assrammed evidence that cERA to be utter bullshit?

Can anything quell the intense sorrow?
BOOZE
Also boos
Can't drink. What now???
You can do anything

If you try hard enough.

Beer!
Hornsby's Hard Cider is surprisingly refreshing when your face is melting from the heat
That is as close to beer as I'll get. The amber draft is wonderful.
Yeah, they need to sell it in 24 packs.
Yes, and YES!
That sounds good.

Spire Mountain cider is also good too.

Fogel just did.
Foot fetishes for everyone!
The Toshiba ad is very stupid.
Fuentes is in the process of blowing it.

You’re welcome.

That doesn't do us any good now.
Schadenfreude?
"Fantastic Play" in 5, 4, 3....
Time to Rays them!
:(edeño.
AHAHAHAHAHA FUENTES
Also Willits you suck, try jumping for it next time.
That was cute of him
WhoopsieFuentes!
Back-to-back.
It just gets better! Back to back.
Fuentesaurus!
Fuck, why can't this faggot Hayhurst copy Fuentes right about now.
Watch your mouth about Hayhurst.

That guy is awesomeness defined. Not as a pitcher, but as a writer and a humorist.

I saw your comment posted right after mine.

And I thought to myself “O crap”

Hey, the Non-Prospect Diarist is pitching!

Who care about the Mariners? Dirk Hayhurst is the fucking bomb. Read some of his diaries from a year or so ago…golden stuff. Guy’s a hugely talented writer.

I:(hiro.
Dude...

Not even on an 0-4, three error, not smiling Ichiro day.

I think you need to be below the Mendoza for the frowny things.
We've got a lot of players who qualify.
Ok, how about I:)hiro!
No.
Maybe just a little bit when no one is looking?
Ichr:O
I mean Ichir:O
GOD

Look what you’ve started.

Ok, this might be of your approval, I>:)hiro
No nonononono.

The face-in-a-name thing is for Cedeño only, and anything more is overuse and ruins it.

I don't think you caught the joke.

> = eyebrows, get it?

\m/ICHIRO\m/
I don't know what this is, but NO!
Someone make me a mod.
Let's take every meme and kill it dead
Or better yet put them to poor yooz.
I love Johjima.

Raben doubled in the eighth while Kenji Johjima had backspasms and John Olerud was sucking. =(edeno then took over for Yuni the monkey and [coathanger] the flipping Lilibridge. PUNS!

Eli Whiteside has an oldtimey name that not many modern people have as their own names
That's the spirit
What an awful Felix day
Griffey blew it
:Griffy
I think you need to stop trying that joke.
I think I do too.
FUCK IT'S OVER
Anyone know what the best tasting stuff under the sink is?
Try mixing the Lysol with lime.
Tastes just like Bud with Lime!
More like Death-Sprite!
No, but Doc Minus could probably tell which one cures cancer
Tumors stop growing shortly after your heart stops beating.
Impeccable treatment regimen Doc, your success rate must be phenomenal
Is that 42-10 in the last 4 games?

Ugh

TRADE WASHBURN NOW!
You know if he pitches well tomorrow, all we will hear is that you can't trade him because he is the only good pitcher.
Fuentes really screwed the pooch huh
Yes that would be an accurate description.
He engaged in bestiality on the mound?

I feel like if this were true, it would be a headline somewhere.

Damn east coast bias.
The fettish st is above.
Hey go Gary.

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