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55-51, Game Summary

I hate sloppy nine-inning games that take way longer than they ought to, so in protest here's my quick but descriptive summary in 50 words or less.

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Ichiro (7) RRS? uh oh RRS :( Beltre too shoulder OK? Lopez is all right Griffey death rattle Yuni hustle Yuni heads-up wizzle wozzle Branyan BABIP double Gordon/Butler no Web Gem why now Yuni why us Branyan BABIP single D’ohjima Aardsma? Aardsma?? ICHIRO!

5 recs  |  79 comments

Comments

Well Done

short succinct descriptive compact efficient myomy

I wish the game was one-fourth as pithy as you.
Sounds like the average Twitter update.

Someone remind me why that site is suddenly all the rage? Status updates are nothing new.

Brilliant!
I can't think of a better way to summarize this game with less than 50 words.
I like d'ohjima
I LOVE D'OHJIMA!

If you’re gonna do it, do it right.

It's funny and all, but not very informative. What's wrong with RRS?

I missed the first half of the game. I assumed he just had a mediocre game (maybe combined with some bad luck on balls in play). Did he get hurt?

It's only informative if you watched, I guess

RRS just had an off night is all. Not hurt, and his velocity was good for him.

What do you want from me?

I work til six! I watch what I can…

LL isn't exactly the AP
That explains why the Pulitzer committee laughed when I sent them this
I thought it was the fact that it was a funny game recap

and the laughter was sincere. There just isn’t a shred of humanity left in these people.

What a snoozer, bookended by Ichiro fireworks at both ends of the game.

The highlight clip of his catch is fantastic, what an incredible player.

Here's a link to the catch, as called by the KC gamecaller:

Ichiro’s catch.

Look at where he started from, and how far he had to go to get that final out. What a gamer!

As the KC announcer said, Ichiro WANTED that ball!
Wizzle-wozzle?
Playoffs!
Our playoff odds are are 1%
That's what they told the light brigade!

But did that stop them? FUCK NO!

Ours is not to reason why
Ours is but to swap vets for prospects when the price is high.
A third of a league, a third of a league, a third of a league onward.

Into the valley of the West rode the 30(0).

If these were the 06 Mariners, I wouldn't mind them all shot to shit by Russian cannon at the end of the season

this year not so much.

and I buy a lottery ticket once a month

what’s your point?

My point is that Fogel is a retarded homosexual
So Kelley got a Batitsa win.
Ah, now I remember Ichiro's favorite saying...

Good times.

Apparently Guillermo Mota brings it out in people

Today was the second time a hitter has come to try and hunt him down after a game (Piazza was the first)

Mota pitches for the Mariners/Royals?
The two match ups have uniform color similarities that may have caused this confusion.
Every game summary should end with Ichiro!
Don't look now

But the M’s just gained a game on the Angels for the first time since July 17th.

It….BEGINS!!!

I was at the game...

and I have to say that the reaction of the fans to the Ichiro catch at the end of the game made the whole, sweaty-ass, aggravating game worthwhile.

And I was apparently in the Mariners Fans Only row of seats

The 12 year old kid in our row had a DIY Hyphen jersey, either that or the “replica” jerseys have cheap iron-on lettering that peels off after a year of regular wear…

So how did the fans react?

Just curious

There was, in fact, a collective groan on the pop-up

but when the ball appeared to disappear into the crevice they all seemed tm think that it got away and almost everyone was on their feet cheering. After about 3 seconds of cheering, there was a millisecond of silence followed imediately by cries of futile outrage and shame. As bad as the Mariners have been off and on in the last 20 years, I still can’t imagine the humiliation of being a Royals fan.

I can't type

Or form a clear, entertaining narrative for that matter…

I heard a huge collective groan when Buck popped up.

Was that it?

Now we know what was wrong with Aardsma.

apparently, he is unavailable tonight as he just had a boil removed from his posterior.

And speaking of posterior boils, Bedard is going to have another MRI
RC is gonna kick your ass.
Ahem. It is the situation, not Erik.
ALWAYS SHOOT THE MESSENGER FOR IT IS THE BEST WAY TO GO
Please don't shoot Randy!

He didn’t do anything to Aardsma’s Butt or Erik’s shoulder.

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