There's no official confirmation on this just yet, since it's playoff time and Bud Selig doesn't like to see non-playoff teams in the news while playoff teams are playing, but by reports all over Twitter and elsewhere, the Mariners have decided to hire Eric Wedge to take over in the dugout. Wedge wins out over Bobby Valentine and the other four guys you won't be able to remember three years from now.
It's fitting that Wedge is the guy. Since the Zduriencik front office took over in Seattle, Indians fans have been telling us how many parallels there are between the two organizations. In a lot of ways, the Indians were the new Mariners before the new Mariners. They had a sharp front office that blended excellent scouting with advanced statistical analysis. They were said to be among the best-run organizations in baseball, a team in good hands that should be able to compete year after year for quite some time. And then they enjoyed only moderate success while cracks began to form and the team greatly underachieved. All along, everybody figured the Indians had the right process, but they struggled to get the results.
The Indians from earlier in the decade were a lot like the Mariners from later in the decade. And now the Mariners have hired the Indians' old manager.
As we've been writing throughout this entire interview and hiring process, we can't say whether this is a good move or not, and no amount of research will reveal the answer. Wedge, obviously, has some very good qualities. He also has some bad ones, and things certainly didn't end up very good for him in Cleveland. The trouble is that a manager's primary responsibilities concern things like morale and accountability and communication. These all fall under the broader term of "chemistry," and as the entire 2010 season just proved to us, you can't predict how chemistry is going to work out.
It's quite different from actual laboratory chemistry when you think about it. In the lab, you can mix a bunch of known compounds and end up with a known product (and several side products in appropriate molar ratios). In the clubhouse, you can mix a bunch of known compounds, but you have no idea ahead of time how it's going to work. The Mariners, I assume, have a pretty good understanding of who Eric Wedge is. They also have a pretty good understanding of who their players are. But you just don't know how they'll come together. One wrong statement can spoil a relationship. We saw this with Wakamatsu and the whole Griffey ordeal. Through the simple action of benching Griffey without properly communicating the message, Wak lost the entire team. Those things can happen, and you can't see them coming.
From here, Wedge seems to be a fine choice. He's managed teams like this - teams that are at least pseudo-rebuilding, with a blend of experienced veterans and wide-eyed little kids. A number of former players seemed to like him, and those that didn't like him at least respected him. Wedge has been a good communicator. Wedge has been a leader without being an overmanager. Wedge has been respectful and protective of his players, and his players have been respectful and protective of him back. Wedge's track record is encouraging. It's just - again, it comes down to what we can't predict. Every Mariners player in 2009 would've said good things about Wak. It's funny how moods change when things go sour.
A lot will be made of the fact that former Indian Milton Bradley once walked around the clubhouse wearing a shirt that said "fuck Eric Wedge". It's definitely weird, and a funny if unsettling story. But Milton Bradley last played for Eric Wedge in March 2004. It's been six and a half years. Bradley was a young player who hadn't yet turned 25. Wedge was about to begin only his second season managing. People change. Who were you six and a half years ago? Who were you when you were 24? Who were you when you were 30? People mellow out. They become more understanding. They become more forgiving, and less sensitive. It's possible that Milton Bradley may still hate Eric Wedge. But six and a half years ago, I hated grapefruit. Now I have one every morning.
Additionally, it ultimately doesn't really matter what Milton Bradley thinks anyway since Milton Bradley isn't a part of the future, while Wedge, ideally, is.
So this is the guy. The Mariners have been managed by the guy who argued to cancel the snow game, and the Mariners will now be managed by the guy who argued to keep playing. It's exciting to have a new hire. Even a new hire as seemingly bland as Wedge, at least when compared to Bobby Valentine. That excitement will die down after a while, and once the season's underway, most everyone's feelings for Wedge should settle somewhere around "mild dislike". He'll bat players where you don't want him to bat players. He might call for too many bunts or hit-and-runs or bad sinkerballers out of the bullpen. Eric Wedge is no sabermetric hero. He'll have his annoying managerial ticks, just like they always do.
But the true test of how good a manager he is - that won't be quite so visible. We'll only know if Wedge was the right guy when the season's nearly over. And even then, we won't know if he's the right guy for 2012. Everything changes. Everything is hard to predict.
Hopefully Eric Wedge pans out. Hopefully, he sticks.
0 recs | 176 comments
Obviously
No one has read this yet:
http://www.letsgotribe.com/2010/10/14/1751918/eric-wedge-a-very-convincing-guy
Actually, I’m really surprised. I thought for sure Bobby Valentine was the lead for the job out there. With his ties to the Japanese league, your Japanese ownership and big star I figured he’d be perfect. Well, good luck with Wedge—at least you’re taking him off the market and making the Cubs’ decision making process a little easier while your at it.
snowyman28 - October 15, 2010
Incorrect.
You had already read it.
Sec 108 - October 15, 2010
Looks like those Cubs fan repellant candles are dying down again.
Better order a few more.
Eyebrows - October 15, 2010 via mobile
I have a spare one
Eyeball Kid - October 15, 2010
Wedge sort of looks like the blobfish in that one.
JY - October 15, 2010
.
ThundaPC - October 15, 2010
Works for me.
Teej - October 15, 2010
Punnnssssss
Jeff Sullivan - October 15, 2010
Who's gonna be first to make the obvious "He's gonna drive a Wedge between the clubhouse!" pun?
Goose - October 15, 2010
You.
Thingray - October 15, 2010
Chone Figgins can't get a word in Wedgewise!
Jeff Sullivan - October 15, 2010
Much better.
Thingray - October 15, 2010
NOT A PUN
Matthew - October 15, 2010
At the press conference.
“Excuse me, mind if I Wedge in here and ask the new manager a quick question?”
Does this qualify?
Thingray - October 15, 2010
Still not a pun
pdb - October 15, 2010
Can we have quips?
Ence - October 15, 2010
How about a Wedgie instead
Kermit. - October 15, 2010
I'm apparently not exactly clear on the definition of "pun" then.
Of course English is my second language.
Thingray - October 15, 2010
Who cares! Lets run this into the ground before we all get boxed!
Kermit. - October 15, 2010
A pun is a humorous play on words
Using a last name as an action word isn’t strictly a pun, I don’t think
pdb - October 15, 2010
Seems to me like it fits.
Otherwise you’d have to say “look at Eric over in the corner”.
Then the next person says: “Yeah, it’s almost like he’s wedged in there”.
Pun, right?
Thingray - October 15, 2010
More like a double entendre
lemonverbena - October 15, 2010
Bitch...
Then I seriously don’t know how to make a pun.
Thingray - October 15, 2010
Personally I'm waiting Antilles officially announced as the manager
Before I get too worked up about this one way or the other
Kermit. - October 15, 2010
THAT IS A PUN
Matthew - October 15, 2010
I must be the village idiot, because I don't understand.
Thingray - October 15, 2010
Well I'll be
Jeff Sullivan - October 15, 2010
Why do I get the feeling that you're agreeing that I'm an idiot?
Thingray - October 15, 2010
Antilles=until he's
joey90 - October 15, 2010
Wedge Antilles = Rebel pilot from the Star Wars movies.
I think that’s all the necessary pieces.
PissedMick - October 15, 2010
I get how it sounds.
I just don’t get how using the name of some islands in the Caribbean makes this a pun.
Thingray - October 15, 2010
Puns require that the word in question sound like, but not exactly be, the phrase replaced.
Kermit uses Antilles to replace “until he’s”.
You, or anyone, using Wedge to replace “wedge” is not a pun.
Matthew - October 15, 2010
"Puns require that the word in question sound like, but not exactly be, the phrase replaced."
Okay, now I understand. Thank you Matthew.
Thingray - October 15, 2010
Except he's wrong.
A pun is pretty much any play on words. You were right.
Liebkartoffel - October 15, 2010
This is correct.
Homonymic puns are puns that the same word has different meanings, in this case the word Wedge when referring to Eric Wedge, and a wedge.
CapSea - October 15, 2010
Though it is a little lazy.
CapSea - October 15, 2010
As long as you consider it
as a play on the two meanings of Wedge—one being “something that serves to part, split, divide, etc” and the other being “a middle aged man who is overpayed for making largely incorrect calls.”—then it works out.
Liebkartoffel - October 15, 2010
No, it's not funny.
Matthew - October 15, 2010
Not particularly,
but it can safely be designated as a “pun.”
Liebkartoffel - October 15, 2010
`
http://www.lookoutlanding.com/2010/10/15/1753654/eric-wedge-it-is#49399266
Matthew - October 15, 2010
"the usually humorous use of a word in such a way as to suggest two or more of its meanings or the meaning of another word similar in sound"
Merriam-Webster
This would be the ‘two meaning’ type of pun.
quacker27 - October 15, 2010
You might be right, actually
pdb - October 15, 2010
Nope.
JY - October 15, 2010
A pun is using words that sound like other words to make a joke.
So something like, “Immanuel doesn’t pun, he Kant”, has Immanuel Kant’s last name, “Kant” punned against the word “can’t”.
Or “You can tune a guitar, but you can’t tuna fish.” Tune a and tuna are punned.
Or “Why do we still have troops in Germany? Answer: To keep the Russians in Czech” puns the word Czech and check.
joof - October 15, 2010
"You must be from France, because you're a peein'."
Pun?
Thingray - October 15, 2010
Yes.
joof - October 15, 2010
Also, "Fister? I hardly know'er!"
joof - October 15, 2010
Wait, isn't this the same as saying "Can I wedge in there and ask the new manager a question?"
Thingray - October 15, 2010
Not quite.
Fister is substituting for “fist her.” But, by a simple textbook definition of puns, both qualify. I just don’t have the energy (or the interest, because really, who cares?) to mount a literary argument against the misunderstanding.
Both are wordplay. Leave it at that.
harkening - October 15, 2010
Matthew clarified everything a little higher up.
I’m done.
Thingray - October 15, 2010
I just realized I don't remember what this joke is originally.
joof - October 15, 2010
After some googling, it turns out the answer is "Poker"
joof - October 15, 2010
Nope.
Pun is a broader category than you think it is.
Liebkartoffel - October 15, 2010
I tried to take one from every category of pun on wikipedia!
There were thousands of them!
joof - October 15, 2010
I don't know where the idea that puns can't be based on homophonic/homographic words came from...
but my soon-to-be completed degree in English literature would beg to differ. Puns can be double entendres if and only if they are intentionally so.
harkening - October 15, 2010
This is why I'm confused.
I’m not an English major, and I don’t recall ever studying puns, but I’ve always thought puns could be simply using the word or name as part of the joke. Although I admit I don’t know if that fits the textbook definition.
Thingray - October 15, 2010
I don't give a shit what your degree says
but in the interest of semantics, let me offer this olive branch:, they can be technically puns.
What they are never, is funny.
Matthew - October 15, 2010
I wasn't trying to argue.
With regards to the “funny” part, agreed.
harkening - October 15, 2010
Coming back to this,
I apologize if this came across as degrading of your point. I meant it in a jocular tone.
Matthew - October 16, 2010
You don't think
double entendres are funny? You must hate nearly all British humor, then.
Liebkartoffel - October 15, 2010
They aren't visually funny
This is a visual medium
Matthew - October 15, 2010
You must be a blast at parties.
wilsonpdx - October 16, 2010
The Wedge of Darkness
lemonverbena - October 15, 2010
NO MORE PUNS
Jeff Sullivan - October 15, 2010
OR PUN ATTEMPTS
Jeff Sullivan - October 15, 2010
I'M A GREASED UP DEAF GUY!!!
YOU NEVER GONNA CATCH ME!!!
Thingray - October 15, 2010
Oh yes I can
Jeff Sullivan - October 15, 2010
I'm going to punt on this one
lemonverbena - October 15, 2010
OKAY OKAY OKAY!!
Let go!! SORRY!!
Geez…
Thingray - October 15, 2010
M's get a Wedgie?
ehhh? ehhhhhh?? Last year we got Wak-ed, next year we get a Wedgie, it pretty much describes being a Seattle sports fan.
dundundun - October 18, 2010
And now I know more about puns than I ever wanted to.
EducationaLL
the other side - October 15, 2010
"But six and a half years ago, I hated grapefruit. Now I have one every morning."
OH GOD MILTON BRADLEY IS GOING TO EAT ERIC WEDGE FOR BREAKFAST
Eyebrows - October 15, 2010 via mobile
He's got chunks of managers like Wedge in his stool
Kermit. - October 15, 2010
Fuck him then eat him?
When did Milton turn into a preying mantis?
Sec 108 - October 15, 2010
Well, that's the way I enjoy my grapefruit.
Eyebrows - October 15, 2010 via mobile
You can't spell grapefruit without rapefruit.
Eyebrows - October 15, 2010 via mobile
Well it does have all the letters..
Ence - October 15, 2010
You can't spell grapefruit without ape gut either.
Thingray - October 15, 2010
Or rufi
HititHere - October 15, 2010
Grapefruit Wedges for everyone!
PissedMick - October 15, 2010
I enjoy my grapefruit while wearing a shirt that reads, "Fuck Grapefruit."
RustyJohn - October 15, 2010
As previously pointed out
“Fuck Eric Wedge” is a suggestion/command, as opposed to “I fuck Eric Wedge”. Get it right! This shit is real now!
lemonverbena - October 15, 2010
Shorry wha wazz dat?
Fruffing uff Ewic wight naw.
Sec 108 - October 15, 2010
Hmmm?
joof - October 15, 2010
Wow, haven't seen or thought about that one in a while.
Goon alert!
sanford_and_son - October 16, 2010
Milton needs to back away from the Wedge.
MFAN - October 15, 2010
710 just had one of the Indians announcers on
he claims Shapiro fought the Wedge firing, and that it came from ownership, who wanted an excuse after the firesale.
msb - October 15, 2010
Excuses, excuses
Ence - October 15, 2010
Shapiro ♥s Wedge.
(♥s sounds like hearts but IS NOT EXACTLY the same. PUN!)
westbrook - October 15, 2010
When should I start up my righteous indignation...or rapturous glee?
I’m so confused as to how the internet wants me to react to this news.
pdb - October 15, 2010
The third option
Complete indifference!
Jeff Sullivan - October 15, 2010
Foiled again!
ermac - October 15, 2010
That's the approach I've taken so far and I will probably continue to do so
pdb - October 15, 2010
Indifference is difficult to recognize on the internet without the proper usage of 'meh'
Jeff Sullivan - October 15, 2010
And I suppose the very act of participating in this thread puts the lie to my claims of indifference anyway
pdb - October 15, 2010
Moderate indifference!
msb - October 15, 2010
That's why I'm not participating
Indifference (and neutrality) make the world go circles
beastwarking - October 15, 2010
and yet here you are!
pdb - October 15, 2010
... No I'm not?
beastwarking - October 15, 2010
two coments in this thread would be pretty damning evidence of participation
pdb - October 15, 2010
Could that really be considered participation though?
If it is; yay, participation points
beastwarking - October 15, 2010
So is it indignation or glee, then?
eponymous_coward - October 15, 2010
It's more "well okay then"
pdb - October 15, 2010
How different is this from "meh" levels of indifference?
eponymous_coward - October 15, 2010
it's less internetty
pdb - October 15, 2010
The thought of Opening Day next year is already making me cringe.
Whatever manager they hire isn’t going to do anything to change that feeling
Kermit. - October 15, 2010
Felix Day!
eponymous_coward - October 15, 2010
Whatever it is, it's important to have a strong opinion on this subject
ermac - October 15, 2010
I have a strong opinion that I am kinda indifferent.
msb - October 15, 2010
You'd think in the age of twitter they'd at least be able to tell us that in <140 characters.
Take out the analysis, I just need to know how pissed I need to be.
JY - October 15, 2010
Time to add "Fuck Eric Wedge" t shirts to the LL Store
Poochie - October 15, 2010 via mobile
Hey I would buy one
and I don’t know a thing about the guy. It’d just be a good conversation starter for other Mariner fans.
Ence - October 15, 2010
Easier to put on a shirt than:
“I will take Eric Wedge out for a nice seafood dinner, and not call him!”
JAH - October 15, 2010
I would rather have this on my t-shirt.
Chad Johnson - October 15, 2010
Physiognomy.
Russell Branyan + Mike Sweeney = Eric Wedge.
msb - October 15, 2010
Angry huggy?
lemonverbena - October 15, 2010
Who in that is angry?
I was going to ask if Wedge has a bad back actually…
Thingray - October 15, 2010
I'm just looking at the faces.
msb - October 15, 2010
Wedgie has back spasms.
Eyeball Kid - October 15, 2010
Are we sure the front office knows about the "F*** Wedge" shirt?
G_ - October 15, 2010
Let's not go down this road, okay thanks
pdb - October 15, 2010
Not sure without Rick Adair's input
Jeff Sullivan - October 15, 2010
Perhaps someone has explained how the Googles on the Internets tubes work.
eponymous_coward - October 15, 2010
It is a series of pipes.
RustyJohn - October 15, 2010
But Wedge isn't fiery!
Corco - October 15, 2010
Heh.
I am amazed how many fans of how many teams want fiery.
msb - October 15, 2010
That's because fiery is fun to watch, even if the manager is retarded
The 2010 Seattle Mariners were approximately the most boring team in baseball less Felix, so for me the number one way I will judge any move we make is “Does this make the team more fun to watch?” especially if we don’t know if the move helps us win games or not.
Corco - October 15, 2010
Along with "developing youngsters".
eponymous_coward - October 15, 2010
That may infact depend on ones escalatory scale of emotions to determine when exactly fiery has been met.
Then again it might also be derived from which Yuni he intends to wear opening day.
DHforHOF - October 16, 2010
I did just notice that Wedge is actually talking over and past the hand, so there's that
lemonverbena - October 15, 2010
Does this mean he doesn't take instruction well?
Thingray - October 15, 2010
Poorly made joke photo time!!
BrettJMiller - October 15, 2010
How long till we start calling him Red 2?
JAH - October 15, 2010
Right now!
harkening - October 15, 2010
After melting my brain with awful puns/not puns I'm going to rename him
Eric Fulcrum. Eric Doorstop. Anything but Wedge.
Kermit. - October 15, 2010
Eric Inclined Plane?
Faux - October 16, 2010
Eric 10 Iron
New England Fan - October 16, 2010
Is it just me or does Jack Z sort of look like Larry King there?
Coach Owens - October 15, 2010
All you
Matthew - October 15, 2010
So all him
Jeff Sullivan - October 15, 2010
Nah, nah.
The big head, the hunched shoulders. That’s just like Larry King.
Coach Owens - October 15, 2010
Still only you.
joey90 - October 15, 2010
You guys are a drag.
Coach Owens - October 15, 2010
Bwahahaha.
Excellent.
joof - October 15, 2010
Oh Eric poor Eric
better men than you have been broken by these Ms. Good luck, kid.
Bearskin Rugburn - October 15, 2010
I read this as referring to someone named "Ms. Good Luck".
Thingray - October 15, 2010
She's got a massage parlor gown on Canal Street.
Bearskin Rugburn - October 15, 2010
My indifference is raging so hard right now.
I can’t even……oh, nevermind.
sanford_and_son - October 15, 2010
Call a doctor if your raging indifference lasts more than six hours.
Thingray - October 15, 2010
I predict 5 more minutes before FUCK ERIC WEDGE is a dead meme.
HititHere - October 15, 2010
GOD! I JUST WANT HIM GONE ALREADY
joof - October 15, 2010
That's what I'm going to say when they hand me my tab at the bar tonight.
“Fuck Eric Wedge!” and see if anyone notices. They won’t.
Thingray - October 15, 2010
FIRE ERIC WEDGE
Bearskin Rugburn - October 15, 2010
Piece of shit hasn't done a single thing right as our manager
Bearskin Rugburn - October 15, 2010
Douchebag hasn't even won a single game.
pdb - October 15, 2010
You'd think he'd have at least filled out a line up card by now.
Kermit. - October 15, 2010
After Ichiro what difference does it make?
Coach Owens - October 15, 2010
Meh, what indifference does it make?
Paul Marrott Weaver - October 17, 2010
Playoffs?????
MT Olson - October 15, 2010
Terrible Choice
Might as well have brought back BoMel or Grover
New England Fan - October 15, 2010
Why?
msb - October 15, 2010
Personally I think he's going to provide the exact leverage we need.
Kermit. - October 15, 2010
Because he's the same guy
New England Fan - October 16, 2010
How is he the same guy?
Three different personalities, three different managerial records.
msb - October 16, 2010
Agreed, this is going to turn out Bradley.
CapSea - October 15, 2010
You are a treasure.
the other side - October 15, 2010
Priceless
scottg02 - October 15, 2010
I am leaving, now. To practice my puns
But I shall return. And when that day comes, sir, you will meet your end. Oh yes, oh yes indeed.
Kermit. - October 15, 2010
Sounds like you're pretty Kermitted to beating me.
But I doubt you actually have the will, son.
CapSea - October 15, 2010
I do not mean to pry, but you don't by any chance happen to have six fingers on your right hand?
Kermit. - October 16, 2010
Eric Mehdge?
box13_seattle - October 15, 2010
It's a punmanteau!
PissedMick - October 17, 2010
I think
the first time Milton meets with Wedge he should wear the “Fuck Eric Wedge” shirt. If they have both grown up, it should be a great ice breaker. Hell, Bradley may get fired up if Wedge laughs and have the Bradley season we were hoping for last season.
I love the Red 2 reference.
Game situation next year:
Wedge: “Milton, you need to get a hit here, even if the guy is throwing 102!!”
Bradley: “the ball is so small coming in at that speed skip!!”
Wedge: “It’s no bigger than the Womp Rats you were knockin’ outta the park during Spring Training!!”
I’m sorry, this is lame, but I had to do it.
seanchristopher - October 15, 2010
I know when I was 24 I was a lot more uptight.
Kirk - October 15, 2010
.
Men who love Eric Wedge
msb - October 16, 2010
By the way, the comments there might put the Times to shame.
msb - October 16, 2010
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