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Hit it, Larry LaRue. This is the most obvious link and blockquote in the history of the Mariner blogosphere.

The Griffey that a year ago helped build camaraderie in the Seattle clubhouse has taken a leave of absence this season. There have been times during games when he’s retired to the clubhouse, texted friends, watched the TV broadcast.
...

So why didn’t Wakamatsu go to Junior off the bench.

"He was asleep in the clubhouse," one player said. "He’d gone back about the fifth inning to get a jacket and didn’t come back. I went back in about the seventh inning – and he was in his chair, sound asleep."

I'm not going to use this as another reason to get mad at Junior. That wouldn't be fair. What I will say, though, is that maybe people should lighten up on Milton Bradley a little bit. Players leave the dugout all the time. Pitchers shower and hang out in the clubhouse. Griffey falls asleep. If Bradley "quit on his team," then so did Seattle's greatest sports icon, because while Bradley may have left the stadium, it's not like Griffey was offering much support from his barcalounger.

Interestingly, LaRue hints that the time may be nigh for the organization to find a solution to the Griffey dilemma. I didn't realize we had options.

Note: here's the text-only version of the article, if the link isn't loading.

0 recs  |  330 comments

Comments

Really hope this turns into the first step for the retirement announcement.

To be able to open up that roster spot (maybe 2 if Sweeney goes away too) would go a long ways in enabling some flexibility and maybe adding a good bit of offense (if the right piece can be traded for)

Is the link to LaRue's article broken for anyone else?
As you can imagine, it's generating a lot of traffic
Good.

As long as the word is being spread.

I also sent it over to Tim Dierkes at MLB Trade Rumors

Just to get it out there some more… He just posted a brief about it over there.

At the rate it's spreading, the TNT blog servers are doomed.
LaRue oughta get a raise for all the traffic he is generating today.
He doesn't blog much, but he apparently blogs big.
The money from a traffic increase may need to go to new servers
Quality > quantity, as the saying goes.
Ina bold, dramatic managerial move, designed to show how seriously this sort of thing is taken,

Wakamatsu has replaced Griffey’s recliner with one of those #3.99 plastic outdoor chairs from Home Depot. When asked about it, he said “I’d like to see ANYBODY fall asleep in one of those things!”

Wow I really can't type today.
It was still funny.
From personal experience

I’m not sure it’d be able to hold his weight.

You've had to bear Griffey's weight?
He must play for the Mariners.
If this team was serious about winning they'd give Jr. Sr. the retire with dignity, go to the 60 DL, or be released ultimatium
Which apparently is happening?!?!?!
Wait, what!?
I can't wait to read that article!
I'm lucky to have gotten in before the server crash... It really is something that could have a large affect on things in the minds of fans
I'm just going off of twitter hints
Seriously?

Seriously?

Seriously?

I mean….. Seriously?

Those remaining Griffey promotions are going to be awkward if he is released.
60-day DL is the likely way if he doesn't retire, I would think..
With what?

Insomnia?…

It’s not…. fatal familial insomnia, is it?

Thats the worst.
Realistically, knee problems?
We do need a new hitting coach
That would be interesting...

Hey Alonzo! Thanks for coming up and acting as hitting coach… But, well..

..

Here is your bus ticket back to Tacoma.

From the announcement, he was the interim hitting coach, so I'm not sure if he really is expecting to stay long.
Problem solved!
Thats gotta be kind of annoying for him.
For Alonzo Powell?

Probably, but he went 16/56 in his big league career. I don’t mean to be harsh or anything, but…there are people with established pedigrees floating around who can, in theory, actually hit. And have proven it over long big league careers.

A self-aware man should know that his qualifications don’t really merit certain positions.

Yes.

I mean he was probably happy in Tacoma and now he has to be in Seattle for some unspecified amount of time.

You know how well Paul Molitor took off, though.

I’m tempted to ask Dan Wilson what his thoughts are on being a hitting coach or a manager. He probably has other things to do, but he strikes me as the kind of smart you need to be.

He was a better catcher than Wak.

RoJo go bye bye.

Wilson would send Rob up to Vancouver to take lessons from Luongo or something.

more hockey goalies need to become catchers. All we gotta do is find one who can hit.

Maybe in the US...

But in Japan he was batting champion 3 straight years. Which i don’t consider to be ANYTHING to be sneezed at. Maybe he didn’t play much here, but I still think he is qualified.

That being said, Employing Griffey as a Hitting coach/pinch hitter that we can trot out at the end of meaningless games for fans adulation is a great idea, and I hope that management thinks the same thing

If we're going to run out a player with zero skills could we at bring Byrnes back?
Playing softball will certainly help cut down on his uppercut swing
No.
Aw jeez it's not like the Royals will give up Yuni
Your ideas bring nothing but pestilence, famine, and rapine to the land.
Aw they're mostly stolen from Fogel
I'm the one that likes Brynes
No that's me
No that's me
No that's me.
You all can have Brynes

I’m the one that likes Eric Byrnes

No that's me
Yeah Eric Brynes

that is who we’re talking about

For as little as hitting coaches probably really help,

Griffey would probably be a horrible one. What’s he going to teach?
“Don’t worry about work ethic, just rely on the unbelievable talent you were given until you’re thirty or so, give up,
and milk that reputation for another ten years.”

Amazingly talented players, typically make shitty coaches,

because mortals can’t do things the way they did them.

Not only the promotions, but this:

The All-Star game has coaches, right?
Ask Tommy Lasorda how it feels to be a base coach at an ASG
I like that Griffey's picture has a grass background when he's unlikely to ever see the field.
Ooohhhhh

This makes me sad and happy and depressed and optimistic and just generally conflicted and split in two.

So, I'm guessing maybe the Kangaroo Court hasn't been in session a whole lot.

and, boy, he must really be missing the sugar from all that sodypop.

Oh man, I can't wait to read this whole article!
Dave just threw up a post about the same thing

and he seems to think one of our DHs is gone within the next couple days. Also, he took away from that article that Jr was the one possibly leaving. So yea, traffic die down so I can read it myself!

Ha!

Honestly, I really wish he was still decent enough to contribute.
Because really, it’s pretty awesome having a fat old guy on the team
that makes himself unavailable to pinch hit due to nap time.

Unfortunately, he doesn’t contribute. It’s time for either hitting coach Junior or 60 day DL Junior.

Here's a solution

A big F U to Griffey for quitting on his teammates and directions to the nearest dugout.

We all know he sucks. No we know he doesn’t give a shit.

I don't believe this is true.
Griffey has always been primarily about Griffey

it’s just that Griffey 2.0 is wrapped in a much more consumer-friendly package than Griffey 1.0 was. Seriously, if you’ve followed Griffey’s entire career this isn’t that far out of character for him.

I don't disagree with this.

I found Mr. 644’s implication that he’s “quit” on his teammates to be a little strong.

If I went to sleep on the job my employer just might consider that quitting.
he was just trying to relax a little

Wak’s been saying all along that the hitters are pushing too hard. Griffdawg was just trying to find his zone.

Can't expect players to stay alert for 162 games a year

Griffey falling asleep in the clubhouse looks bad, but it isn’t really much worse than horsing around in the dugout or checking out ladies. All that stuff about always being on the top step, cheering your team on – that’s college shit.

Agreed, but being unavailable to pinch hit?

That is a step beyond horsing around.

This happened with someone a year or two ago but I can't for the life of me remember who it was
John Olerud(?) was locked in the bathroom

I think it was him.. Can’t find it though

He & Aurillia got stuck in the video room.
Wake his ass up.

Unless he was dead in the chair.

It looks bad to bloggers and fans who have no idea what it's like to grind out a pro season.

Yes, it was on a homestand so jet lag had nothing to do with it, but a true pro knows you’ve got to bank some sleep by taking cat naps BEFORE road trips.

In the days before blogs and deadspin, great players used to grab a few minutes of shut-eye ON THE FIELD. They’d wake up if a ball was hit towards them, or when their teammates shouted (this is how the tradition of calling for fly balls originated). What’d we do with those players? Did we kick them off the team, or hound them out of town? We put them in the hall of fucking fame, people.

He fell asleep in the clubhouse during a game.

How do you excuse that?

At least he doesn't regularly fall asleep on the field like Mike Brumley
He is a 0 WAR player when he is asleep
So he becomes more valuable?
I agree with you

but seems like a 0-8 run is a time when every player ought to care a little more.

But, realistically, it's a time for every player to get frustrated and drift off in his own little world
Dave posted recently about Wakamatsu's much discussed 'belief system'

and how player-friendly it is. I suppose all that trust and support comes with a certain downside – the expectation that a struggling player tries a little harder what is minimally acceptable.

It looks worse than usual because I get the sense he was basically bought back to be a coach
I know.

I’m sure that I’m scrambling to rationalize that behavior of my childhood idol. But from the article it didn’t seem that the players were up in arms about it. They would know better than I what’s acceptable in the clubhouse.

They probably also realize that Griffey being unavailable to pinch-hit may be in the team's best interests
Someone's sneaking some NyQuil into whatever Junior's

drinking instead of soda. Probably a good call.

Seriously, I'm guessing Wak didn't wake him for this very reason.

It’s still disappointing that Wak needs a crutch/excuse to choose another hitter, but here we are.

We're going to look back on this as being way more hilarious than it feels now
It just feels sad.

But if it leads to a real DH for the rest of the season I’ll be happy.

I'm sort of moving that direction now.

I mean, fundamentally, this is pretty funny. A bit sad, a bit surreal, but funny.

I miss Turbo
He needs a crutch/excuse to choose Sweeney.

>:(

Also Griffey wasn't the only left handed bat on the bench better than Sweeney

I’m still wondering why Wak didn’t pinch hit Saunders in that situation.

I think he does give a shit

But this is Griffey we’re talking about and this article doesn’t really surprise me all that much, honestly. Griffey cares. If he didn’t care, he wouldn’t have signed.

Yeah this isn't that different from him running

autographed photos up to the booth during games last year. It’s just that we’re not winning right now and no one’s happy so fans are out for blood.

Maybe he doesn't give a shit.

And he’s so bad because he’s constipated?

Griffey is clearly done.

But I’m still going to be sad to see him go

As a kid, Griffey was the most exciting player I'd ever seen.

I still have an autographed picture of his from spring training in 1989.
This whole season tarnishes his legacy though; to me, the less I see of him now, the better. I don’t want him doing any more damage to this team.

I desperately want him gone now, because then I’ll finally be able to cheer for him one last time.

I'm curious as to how the Griffey apologists will respond to this.
"He is just old... Look at Milton!! He left the stadium!!!!"
"As long as Sweeney is still on the team Griffey can nap all he wants"?
He was showing confidence in his teammates

by making himself unavailable.

"He doesn't sleep well at night, he's away from his family, he's comfortable in the clubhouse..."

“They could have awakened him.”

Have any of you watched an m's game this year and not drifted off?

I can’t blame Griffey at all for getting sleepy. This offense is the cure for insomnia.

EVERYONE would fall asleep if they watched me at work, but I'd still be fired if I fell asleep at work.
Maybe I can sympathize

because I HAVE fallen asleep at work before.

There is a cached version of the article available.

I have no idea if this will work for anyone else.

That's what I just sent to Brock and Salk.. Who are reading it right now
The "text only" version

loads faster

There we go
Probably for the best that it was a post without comments, as well.
Good choice. Definitely.
Well holy shit
Wow. LaRue sounds convinced that this is Griffey's last week with the team.

I also get that it has nothing to do with his sleeping during a game, at least not a lot.

I think it's progress that people are starting to realize that he is done.
This makes me really, really, wish the Griffey had retired at the end of last season.

Because his ending to this season is not going to be pretty.

That's the saddest part to me.

He has the perfect chance to go out on a high note last year and like so many aging superstars just couldn’t let go.

Exactly.. last year was PERFECT timing to call it a career
He was even not-that-horribly-awful last year!
I think that's what we were all hoping for, yeah.

And while I’m sure that this isn’t an unprecedented occurrence, it’s just not acceptable within the context of his lack of performance. It makes him LOOK lazy and uncaring, whether that’s the reality or not.

Go home, Junior. You can nap all you want.

Yeah, this bothers me

I don’t want Griffey DHing, but I feel uncomfortable thinking that he will be released. I wish he could have gone out gracefully, but he didn’t, and now things could get really… awkward. I don’t know if that’s the right word.

Junior, for the love all all that's good, PLEASE retire now

What a totally embarrasing end to a hall of fame career. I can’t think of any sure HOFer (well, non-pitcher) who’s ever gone out with such a whimper. He must be regretting having come back for this last year.

There have been many

Willie Mays comes to mind.

At 41 he hit .184 w/ 0 HRs in 19 games, then was traded to the Mets…where he did slightly better.

At 42 he hit .211/.303/.344 with 6 HRs.

Thus far, Griffey has been worse this year, but last year he was better than Willie’s final line.

That said, Griffey is probably the biggest and most untainted superstar of our generation, so I think he gets more leeway than any other “star” from the steroid era. You wouldn’t see Sosa or Ortiz getting this kind of leash, and that’s for a valid (though maybe not very good) reason IMO.

Here's the game, by the way

http://www.baseball-reference.com/boxes/SEA/SEA201005020.shtml

Aw man that was a close one
Oh God that game was like watching a video of a crash.

You know it’s a disaster, you’re not quite sure at what point in the video it will happen, and people are going to fucking die.

So, when would the PH have come?

in the 4th, with the bases loaded, or in the later innings when noone was on base and he was the last out? Game impact seems minimal. But that only reaffirms my belief that the napping is a small part of the move.

Yeah, no, he's not nearing the end because he fell asleep

In fact, I’m guessing this isn’t the first time this has happened.

Wrong game

http://www.baseball-reference.com/boxes/SEA/SEA201005080.shtml

I thought it was

Both were painful, though.

Oh, shit. Well, could have used a lefty bat there

not sure if Griffey was the answer really, but still. That was the game right there.

I bet he would have taken that walk
My favorite part is where it says Rob Johnson specifically.

Like he is the only one not hitting. Apparently every IS Rob Johnson’s fault.

.
I’m not going to use this as another reason to get mad at Junior.

Cool. I will. Fuck you, Griffey.

I'm so glad I didn't sign on for Grifflent
There is an out clause for retirement, right?
No, no there is not.

Suckers.

No happy ending to this story unless he hits it out.

I guess it doesn’t have to be ML though.

Beer League Softball!
Who is actually still doing Grifflent?
Equally solid question!
I am...

I’ve even lost a few pounds. I’m torn on whether or not I want Griffey to hit the HR… My willpower probably isn’t strong enough to keep this up once I lose that motivation.

As a co-creator of the Kenneth Griffey Jr Challenge, yes there is.
Sucker.
Who's dumber, the creator or the idiot who follows him in giving up hot sauce?
Griffey- Mays

I’m too young to remember but I wonder if this was the same discussion in 1973 when Willie Mays was a shell of is former self on the Mets World Series team.

1973 Willie Mays destroys 2010 Griffey
It's not really that clearcut

Because Mays started 1972 out HORRENDOUSLY… and the 1973 numbers are too similar:

Mays: .211/.303..344 6 HRs over 88 games
Jr: .208/.265/.234 0 HRs over 23 games

Ok, Junior is worse this year… but hey, ground balls to the right side that make it through the hole are still hits, right? Right?

If Griffey played 88 games, maybe he’d end up getting an HR or two to even things out.

Please nobody mention the wOBA

Because Mays in 1973 was .302 and Jr 2010 is at .233, and that’s a pretty big diff.

Not to mention Mays could probably run a little
Mays had 10 doubles and 1 SB over 239 appearances

I guess that’s better than 2 doubles and 0 SBs over 83.

Junior hasn’t stolen a base since 2007, when he stole 6. You gotta go back to his last year as an M, 1999, to find a year where he stole double-digit bases.

Griffey - Mays

                                 BA OBP SLG OPS
1973 Mays .211 .303 .344 .647
2010 Griffey .208 .265 .234 .499

Unlike Griffey, Mays did play the field. He was so bad that that point may favor Junior.

I'd be more than happy if we released him

But I just hope for the sake of goodwill towards the FO he retires.

I may be comparing apples and oranges

But it stands out to me as more than a little interesting that the reaction to Griffey falling asleep in the clubhouse during a game is so drastically different than the reaction to Yuni missing early BP because he was asleep on the team plane during the announcement.

In other news...

“ModernTube: Keith Hernandez falls asleep during Mets game” is a current headline linked on the righthand menu.

Asleep? Or diabetic coma?
I really hope he just becomes a bench coach or retires

It would make me sad to have him be released

I'm sure Powell hasn't moved yet.

Griffey, you can retain your dignity by relinquishing your 25-man roster spot and becoming the hitting coach.

It would make me so happy.
Why?
Because he is old, fat, and useless.
I understand that.

Yet you seem to be actively rooting for his embarrassment as opposed to some sort of retirement or face-saving transition to the front office. I may be misreading you however.

Well, I would rather he become a coach or something,

but I just want him off the roster.

On this we agree.
That would be awesome.

It would make this whole thing less awkward.

He will go home to his family

he will not coach until his kids are off to college, I guess.

I think he'll retire.

The chances of him staying with the organization right now are basically nil.

I'm not sure if it's the same as the blog version

But it’s on the main TNT site here

Yup... That's it!

GO GO GO – before it crashes again!

Uh oh... It has comments enabled!
Anyone know a Joe Rehberger?
Stay Griffey! Why don’t we get rid of Figgins, Moore, Johnson, and pretty much everyone but Ichi and Guti while we’re at it, huh.
Yes, because everything in that article about Griffey leaving says it is all up to him!
This is why the comments should have stayed closed.
Somebody apparently thinks we still have Adam Jones.

I love our fans.

I mean that guy hasn't done anything for the mariners lately.

Cut him now.

I say we trade him to the Orioles and see if we can pry away that budding ace Erik Bedard...
Bavantastic Idea!
Damn it Griffey why didn't you call it a career after last season you old geezer :(

This will not end well. Signing him on for another season was a disaster waiting to happen.

As they say... Preaching to the choir.
How embarrassing.

Or is it even embarrassing at this point? I don’t know anymore.

Sigh.

Nope just darkly hilarious
Great news!

I can’t wait for people to somehow blame this on Milton Bradley.

Sarcasm…I hope.

He's ruining the clubhouse with his absence!
Griffey was so depressed that Milton was depressed.

His performance suffered. Dammit Milton.

As an old school Mariners fan this makes me sad

The sleeping in the clubhouse is bad, but if his legs are as shot as LaRue says, and as they appear to be from his play, Griffey needs to retire. The team can hold a ceremony, retire #24, and bring in someone who can contribute more than happy memories..

This is how I feel as well.

I don’t share the joy and mirth of those who are glad to see his downfall, or whatever this is.

I was 9 when Griffey joined the team. He is one of my childhood heroes. I was 15 when he when from first to home on the double. Watching him play last year was incredible and magical. I was there for what should have been his last game last year. They had so much fun, and in a way, I think Griffey thought that this could last forever, or at least one more year.

This feels like someone is stomping on my nuts. Seriously. I want to cry.

You really didn't see this coming?

Denial ain’t just a river in Egypt.

Yeah, you knew it was coming. But no one thought it would be this bad.

I did
I was delusionally hoping the team would do what it said it was going to do.

And have Griffey in a limited role. Basically just along for the ride. Then they made him the starting DH and I knew this would end poorly.

Yes, Griffey wouldn't have been such a hot topic if he was only playing occasionally.
Absolutely

As a spot start at DH/occasional pinch-hitter, I didn’t have an issue with him being the 25th man on the roster.

But then we brought Sweeney back as well.

And we then proceeded to make Griffey the starting DH against righties…what we have seen has been predictable since…

There was no way this season was going to end well for Griffey,
I feel the same as Henry

We all knew the season was likely going to end badly, but no one predicted a PR debacle where Gramps fell asleep in a La-Z-Boy backstage while the team was mired in an 8 game losing streak.

If there was 1 thing The Kid could still do, it was…well…stay awake and joke with his teammates through a horrendous losing streak.

Seriously. If anyone predicted a Napgate scandal going into this season, I’d love to see it.

Subject line please...

I would argue that just about EVERYONE thought / knew it would be this bad..

I don't think we thought it would be THIS bad

I think before the season I even said .335 wOBA!

No more nostalgia.

Mariners nostalgia in 2010 is officially fucking dead and buried.

No it isn't, which is why it's so fucking annoying.
I'm a bit older, but in the same basic age range.

Aren’t you desperate for him to leave and end this catastrofuck? If you saw Griffey in 1990-1995, then you know how agonizing it is to watch him now.

I’d like him gone, and I’d like to never mention that he was on the team in 2010 again.

Agreed.

This is just ruining his legacy. Like Jordan’s third stint in the NBA.

More like Jordan's stint with the White Sox.
I felt so happy for Griffey's return on the last day of last season when he was carried off the field to a standing ovation

that was the perfect ending to this Griffey 2.0 story. The 2010 postscript has been agonizing.

The perfect ending would have been for him to be traded here during 2007... or to retire here on a one day contract in 2009.
*sigh*

http://www.lookoutlanding.com/2009/2/4/749561/mariners-plan-april-ceremo
http://www.lookoutlanding.com/2009/2/4/749561/mariners-plan-april-ceremo
http://www.lookoutlanding.com/2009/2/4/749561/mariners-plan-april-ceremo
http://www.lookoutlanding.com/2009/2/4/749561/mariners-plan-april-ceremo
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http://www.lookoutlanding.com/2009/2/4/749561/mariners-plan-april-ceremo
http://www.lookoutlanding.com/2009/2/4/749561/mariners-plan-april-ceremo
http://www.lookoutlanding.com/2009/2/4/749561/mariners-plan-april-ceremo
http://www.lookoutlanding.com/2009/2/4/749561/mariners-plan-april-ceremo
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http://www.lookoutlanding.com/2009/2/4/749561/mariners-plan-april-ceremo
http://www.lookoutlanding.com/2009/2/4/749561/mariners-plan-april-ceremo
http://www.lookoutlanding.com/2009/2/4/749561/mariners-plan-april-ceremo
http://www.lookoutlanding.com/2009/2/4/749561/mariners-plan-april-ceremo
http://www.lookoutlanding.com/2009/2/4/749561/mariners-plan-april-ceremo
http://www.lookoutlanding.com/2009/2/4/749561/mariners-plan-april-ceremo
http://www.lookoutlanding.com/2009/2/4/749561/mariners-plan-april-ceremo
http://www.lookoutlanding.com/2009/2/4/749561/mariners-plan-april-ceremo

You are right nearly 100% of the time
As someone who is also late 20's ish

Yes. I’m ready. I wanted to see one more home run in a Mariner uniform in 2009. I got it. Let’s win some games.

I just hope this doesn't have a negative effect on Ichiro

Its been in the back of my mind ever since the season started. Ichiro seems like Junior’s little brother.

Ichiro will be fine.

Its nice when Ichiro is happy but he’s been excellent on some bad teams with sad clubhouses and he’ll continue to be excellent until his body breaks down.

Thats the part I've been worried about

I knew Griffey would slow down, but I understand what his presence did for Ichiro last year. Ichiro will continue to put up great numbers… but if all of us feel this bad watching our childhood hero deteriorate before our eyes, imagine how Ichiro feels.

Yeah, I hope he doesn't return his pre-2009 form.

He was terrible then.

Yeah, especially

that one year when he got less than 200 hits oh wait that didn’t ever happen

If nobody else is going to do it

I will begin the speculation on who the two players were. We know they must have been around while this game happened (May 2 2010).

Hint 1: “Two Mariners players, however, weren’t. Both are younger players, fond of Griffey. Neither had an ax to grind.”
They must be “young” players. We don’t know if this refers to their age or number of years in the majors. For our purposes we can throw out any thought of players above 28 years old.

Hint 2: "He was asleep in the clubhouse," one player said. "He’d gone back about the fifth inning to get a jacket and didn’t come back. I went back in about the seventh inning – and he was in his chair, sound asleep."
Player A (just to keep a distinction between the two sources) entered the clubhouse in the 7th inning. Fister pitched 8 innings so we can rule out any members of the bullpen from entering the clubhouse at this time. Therefore it must be a SP or position player.

Hint 3: “The other player, who knows Griffey a little better, tried to ratonalize.”
This tells us that player B knows Griffey better than player A. One could assume that player A was not on the team last year and player B was. Player B could be any of the position players or pitchers but likely was with the club last year.

Player A: younger than 28 yrs old, not part of the bullpen, likely did not play on the team much last year
Suspects: Casey Kotchman, Adam Moore, Matt Tuiasosopo, Doug Fister

Player B: younger than 28 yrs old, played on the team last year
Suspects: Rob Johnson, Jose Lopez, Franklin Gutierrez, Felix Hernandez, Ryan Rowland-Smith, Jason Vargas

There are definitely flaws in the assumptions but it whittles the list of players down.

Player A always tells the truth and Player B always lies.
If Player A is on a train headed to Chicago at 97 mph and Player B is hitchhiking to Akron in the back of an Amish buggy

what time does Wakamatsu wake Griffey up from his nappy naps?

Too much mention of "Player A"!
It's his mom.

Oh wrong brain teaser.

Warning: Nappy Times! Enter only if you have a valid passport to dreamland!

http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=745

If Player A is on a train headed to Chicago, I say we blow up that damn train.
Which door would the other Player tell me to enter!
By the way, ESPN has picked up the story.

No way this one isn’t going to get national attention now. Still no sign of it on the Seattle Times page, though. Get with it, Baker ;)

Baker is still recovering from writing his usual fluff blog pieces.
Maybe Geoff has a theory on how we can trade Junior

for Octavio Dotel.

I believe everyone is flying to Baltimore.

I assume that they may now know the proverbial fan has been hit, but may not have the chance to respond.

Does this mean I can't make

passive-aggressive swipes? Because if so I’ll never have anything to say.

Never stopped any of us before.
Yes it does mean that because there's no reason for them
Well now I'm confused.
How does that work?

I thought they get the day off and fly out tonight.

Steve Kelley did jump on the "M's won one for Cockrell" train, though.
If they had lost it would have been, "see the hitting coach doesn't matter" or "now they need a new scapegoat".
Feeling good I didn't enter the Griffey Challenge.
Holy shit, the perfect opportunity...

Griffey -→ DFR (retirement)
Saunders -→ fulltime LF
Bradley -→ fulltime DH
Langerhans -→ Backup OF who can spell Frank and Mike once in a while. And Ichiro twice this season.

Please please please please please…

And then I don't hate Sweeney being on the team any more
As much
One hugger is astronomically better than two.
Hate Sweeney, like Girffey but want him to go away three years ago
I don't understand why you hate Mike Sweeney
He's terrible and annoying
So why would Poochie hate him?
Harbors a grudge for Sweeney breaking the news that not all dogs actually go to heaven
Mike Sweeney is too rich to go to heaven
Unfortuantely, they would probably send down Langerhans and try

to acquire a right-handed bat.

I don't think so, Langerhans is an incredible 4th OF.

If we need a RH bat, it’s going to be at the expense of Sweeney. Sweeney’s only job is RH bat, he sucks at it, and if Griffey gets cut it’s hard to imagine them keeping a soft spot for Sweeney.

Let's add

Sweeney — retirement
Hannahan — new good Bloomquist role

Frank and Mike?
Gutierrez and Saunders, I assume.
Yeah it doesn't work
I'm listening to Brock and Salk right now, it is just comical.

‘We can’t release him! That is no way you treat a legend! We can just keep him as a utility player!’
Buh.

This is why they can't be taken seriously.
Salk called the caller out on this.

“How can Griffey be a utility player if he can’t play a position?”

Oh ok it was a caller. That makes more sense.
Jack of all trades, master of napping in the clubhouse.
To be clear that is a random caller's opinion.

Not Brock & Salk’s opinion.

Should note, this is from a caller.
A utility player...

who can’t play any position in the field… which is the definition of a utility player.

Or a coach!!!!
Brock wants to wait until we find out if JR had permission to head back into nappyland.
Maybe he meant utility worker.

Griffey, after all, does have experience sleeping on the job.

And now the callers are turning on the two anonymous players.
I'm surprised it's taken this long.
What if the players were Griffey and Sweeney?!
Oh snap now Salk is tearing into Junior.
Damnit. I missed it! What did he say?
Just went on a rant saying that Griffey is responsible for hitting, being a clubhouse presence, and putting fans in the seats

and it sure as hell doesn’t look like he’s doing any of that.

I hate sports radio

but Salk seems pretty cool. Brock, on the other hand, seems like an arse.

Salk is a smart dude. He has an audience that he has to keep in mind

but he knows what’s what

All this talk about naps....

Is making me tired. Have a great afternoon everyone. See you in a couple hours!

Give this 8 hours

it will come out that Bradley was the unnamed player who ratted Griffey out, and everything will be about Bradley being a bad boy again

Bradley Accused of Reading Griffey Bedtime Story; Legend Falls Asleep During Game
Griffey hurts this team by drooling when he naps.
Griffey hurts this team by drooling when he hits.
To tell you the truth, I always wondered if Ibanez drooled when he hit.

I mean his face was constantly crammed full with tobacco. Wouldn’t surprise me.

Then the sleeping Griffey, la-z-boy chair and all, was carried out of the stadium on the shoulders of his teammates.

Slowly moving pass those close enough could hear the mournful voices of Griffey’s teammates “Jesus Christ, didn’t we do this a few months ago?” “At least we didn’t have to carry this fucking chair then!” “Esta zorra es la grasa.”

With tears in their eyes, the crowd stood, raised their hands in the air and sang one last time: HEY HO! HEY HO!

Don't worry everyone...

Mike Sweeney will lead…

Hey, do you guys want back a player that is really good at giving hugs and creating clubhouse chemistry?
Griffey is a trending topic on TWITTER
Holy crap, that is IMPRESSIVE
Shannon Drayer has a followup story

Sleeping on the Job?

The capitalization made me think this was a reference to the biblical figure.
Shannon Drayer is great. If I am ever on trail, I hope she is there to be a character witness for me.
Against the bears? Boy Scouts?
I like "On Trail" makes it sound rustic!
If I were a cynic, I'd wonder if these reports were a pre-emptive PR bomb from the org to help justify Griffey's impending release.

Because, after all, this is the kind of thing that could compel average fans to accept a Griffey release in a way that arguments about opportunity cost and roster construction would not. This is exactly the kind of cover the organization needs to make the right move.

That would be a shrewd bit of realpolitik, but I’m not yet quite that cynical. I don’t think this was planned, partially because it would make it harder for Griffey to retire gracefully, but the organization probably has a window now in which they could sever ties in a respectful way.

Don't worry everyone, false alarm, Griffey napping on the job is nothing new.

Per Drayer.

I think the real money quote is the part about the cut or force retire.
She's trying to defend him and saying that he could be woken up if need be,

but wasn’t he needed in that situation? It seems like this shows the trust level in him as a PH or maybe I’m reading too much into it.

Yeah, that's what I'm taking from this.
Okay okay we get it he likes to nap and its not a problem

can we still get him off the roster? I mean, I don’t really care if he was unavailable to hit because he was stepping on kittens or ministering to SoDo methheads. I just want the retirement party.

I love the first comment on that.
Thanks!!!!!!!
Thanks, Shannon. This helps give perspective to LaRue’s blog. Amazing how quickly “normal” stuff can be misconstued. If The Kid was doing this even back when Piniella was here…give him a break, wake him up if needed and don’t insinuate that this is indicative of the Mariners’ struggles or Griffey’s motivation. May they score another 8 runs in Baltimore!!!
I am not surprised. I fall asleep all the time watching the Mariners offense....
Yeah but you're not supposed to be a part of it.
And you don't get paid for it.
Oh yeah, I hadn't realized this.
Your signature is apt here.
So the real take-away here is that those two unnamed Mariners should STOP SNITCHIN'
I just finished watching Season 4 of The Wire

and I can’t get the phrase SNITCH BITCH out of my head right now.

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