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Hot Sexy USSM (/LL) Event At Safeco Field, September 4th

This year's LL-rides-the-coattails-of-USSM's-extraordinary-organization-efforts event has been announced, and if you haven't already read Dave's post over there, then you can read my plagiarized post on the same subject right here. I just have to change around enough words to make it seem like it's not his voice anymore. Anybody know a synonym for 'pavilion'?

USSM

You'll notice, of course, the big difference is that this year's event takes place inside the actual stadium, allowing us to maximize attendance and maximize revenue which goes somewhere. You'll also notice that, while Dave talks to you about marginal wins, I talk to you about players who look like they smell, and the front office awkwardly asks why they didn't get a standing ovation this time, you'll be able to watch batting practice on the field, affording a rare opportunity to witness the true hidden extent of Chone Figgins' power. I want to see a BP team of Figgins, Jack Wilson, and Jose Lopez, just for optimum funsies. In my head, players look equally helpless in BP as they do in games. If that isn't true, then I have to start asking myself questions I really don't want to answer.

Oh, right, the event. For the price of $20, you get!

  • a ticket to watch the currently 40-68 Seattle Mariners take on the currently 46-62 Cleveland Indians, who are a Major League Baseball team
  • a ticket to enter and listen to important people talk to you for an hour and a half
  • a t-shirt of some kind
  • maybe an EQC fleece blanket? From the fine people responsible for the EQC Pitch Tracer
  • a chance to mingle for two hours until the game starts with this handsome son of a bitch, and also other people who are all right I guess

So you should come. I assure you that Dave and I won't take up too much of your time, the front office guys who show up always have interesting things to say, and given the circumstances of the season, I'm very curious to see if and how this Q&A event is different from the others, when the organization looked to be on the rise. Are you the world's biggest Brandon Morrow fan who, ever since the trade, has just felt this urge to give Jack a piece of your bitter, angry mind? This isn't not your chance!

Sign up. It'll be awesome. Dave promises.

0 recs  |  71 comments

Comments

Are the t-shirts all-you-can-wear?
I imagine all sizes begin with at least several Xes
When I think LL, I think fat
C'mon!

I burn some of that climbing the stairs outta the basement. My parents won’t let me have a fridge in the basement.

You should train the family pet to get you things from the fridge like the rest of us

Or build a robot

XXLL?
I should certainly hope so
How many t-shirts can one man expect to wear?
Unethical!!!!
This is such a bad weekend for this
Only if you're going to PAX or live really far away or already made travel plans for a holiday weekend
The only way I am in Seattle on September 4th is if I'm taking Ms. Poochie to Bumbershoot

: /

What the fuck is a PAX
NAS Patuxent River

seen here

Penny Arcade Expo

A gamer convention founded by the PA webcomic guys

Man, you are so square.
It's the TV network that is now Ion.
Or Bumbershoot.

Busy weekend.

I will support Jose Lopez in spirit from the Bay Area
Will there be a webcast?
There usually is
Or you can listen to the audio recording that will be posted afterwards
You can buy mp3 files of past events for $9.99 on itunes
I don't think they'll be making up the difference in cost with all the bottled water sales for the wet t-shirt contest.
Finally, I've been wanting to vent to Jack about that trade.

Totally kidding, but double negatives are fun.

Why can I never make these?
Poor planning on your part.
I'm going to buy a ticket for this

and then sit one section over from where everyone’s talking about baseball and start a conversation about random things.

You'll be your own little OT thread.
Please make sure your conversations are not too deep for a baseball stadium.
What if someone (me) already has killer tickets to that game,

but would like to attend the events?

Ask Dave!
Thanks, I'll head over to USSM and see what I can find out.
For those who are curious, here is the answer:

“Only those with USSM tickets can get in before the gates open. If you want to come, you can either sell your regular tickets for that night’s game, or if you’re attached to those seats, buy a ticket to this and then go sit in your normal spot for the game.”

So now I just need to figure out how to use my 300 level tickets to get into the events,

then give them away right before game time so I can use my good tickets… Any thoughts?

More details for the curious.

Per Dave: “You’d have to give your other tickets to the person you’re exchanging them with so they could use those for entry to the park, then you guys would just switch once both are inside. Once your USSM ticket gets scanned to allow you into the event, no one else will be able to use it to enter.”

So, once I go into the park, I can’t even step outside to smoke, or go meet a friend, or anything? This seems weird to me.

You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave.
You can

From the M’s official site:

“Guests exiting the ballpark to smoke must have their ticket scanned for re-entry by a Gate Host prior to exiting.”

So, on your way out, they’ll scan your ticket, and then you’ll be allowed to come back in. I guess you could theoretically give it to someone else outside and then they could use it as a “re-entry”, even if they haven’t yet entered, but there’s a chance the ushers might catch on and be kind of unhappy with you. I make no promises that you won’t get stuck outside if you try this.

I'm guessing that Dave was talking about the event.

The event tickets might have something special in the computer that allows the early entry to the Park but only once?

Why, I think I'm going to be there.
Are you going to break last year's attendance record, which was 500+? That's a lot of t-shirts to bring into the park.
You had me at Hot Sexy....
Annnnnnnnd this is the worst weekend ever.
So if you tweeted this title there are going to be a lot of disappointed bots out there.
Ample time to request a day off!

Hooray!

This is as good a time as any to point out for those unfamiliar with such things

that a transcript of the event will not be available, should you not attend. These things are “off-the-record(ish)”, not that anything top-secret will be divulged, but these events are informal chats done as a favor by the FO, not press events, and as such will not be recorded or transcripted.

However there may be courtroom sketch artists to draw pictures of the scene
Where did I put my charcoals....
Done by me in Paint if you donate 50 dollars to the LL Mods Foundation.
If I give you money right now it's either going for sunscreen or aloe
This is to
Annnnnd another double post fail. I apologize.
This is to awesome to pass up

But sadly I cannot afford the plane ticket. Have fun kids!

Just bought my ticket

Huzzah!

and two more tickets and the requisite airfare

Double huzzah!

No info on who will appear

Is this still undetermined, or do we know who will be there from the M’s?

Expect excellent representation
Ah, so it's undetermined.

I pretty much knew that already, but I thought I’d ask.

I don't know if it's undetermined so much as Dave probably knows and hasn't told me
Basically, we can't promise anything this far out

The event is a month away. Meetings don’t get scheduled this far out, so any commitment we have is tentative, and I’m not going to promote someone without knowing they’ll be there. If I say that Jack’s coming and then something comes up and he can’t make it, I would feel like I didn’t deliver on the product that I sold people, and they’d have a viable reason to complain.

So, we won’t announce any guests until I know that they can be there. But, you know, you can probably assume that we’re not going to get stuck with the janitor.

Good to know. Thanks, Dave.
As opposed to not being quite able to hear us talk.

Which is a dumb reason to complain

I think the word you are looking for is pillory
Wait a second, that might be the wrong word
Swing and a miss
How many seats will be made available?

Do I need to by mine now or can I wait a week?

10,000 or so

Our section is “view reserved”. They’ll keep selling us tickets until those are all gone.

Space is not a problem anymore.

I can't quite tell- are they opening up a concession stand for us at 3:30?
No

There will be vendors selling food in the USSM sectioned off area from 5:10 to 7:10. And, of course, you could always leave that area if you wanted some other kind of food.

Perfect

Thanks

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